Typical Clueless Guy by PygmyPuffLover
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When the morning of the next day dawned bright and early, I was awoken by Molly hitting me over the head with her very heavy pillow.
Did Hermione Weasley drop him on the head too often as a child?
Would you like to know why Ariadne's anger sort of makes sense?
We just stood there like gorms, blinking at her and dripping from head to toe in various breakfast foods.
I wonder why... ah well, I’ll think about it later. For now, I’m hungry.
Do you see what I mean? Do you? This guy hears the words 'deranged' and 'psycho' and automatically knows who it is.
They look like someone has just told them that Ariadne is moving schools and they will never have to see her vile face ever again.
Dorcas the Downtrodden... where do they come up with these names?
Aww, how poetic. You know, other than the bit about my smudged mascara.
Not. – (I did think the ‘not’ was implied, but let’s be honest here, some of you aren’t the brightest, and may need me to advertise the sarcasm in my sentences. No offence like.)
Scorpius really is one of the cutest people I have ever met. If only there was no Rose...
He had sobered up when he got hit by Daphne the Amazing Flying Shoe.
I am officially the epitome of all that is cool.
I'm such a loser.
I curse her to the fierest pits of Hades.
I can just imagine a legion of old ladies with carpet bags and thick coats marching across the countryside like a line of mutant ninjas, waving their walking sticks in the air, and shouting that the noise needed to be turned down, because it was interrupting their cat's sleep.
Yeah, be jealous. Stupid, ordinary nosed people.
When she began to hyperventilate I decided to step in.
Ha, try and find a comeback to that one.
"Dad will laugh at me if I come home with no toothbrush again!"
I just feel like what he says means something that he's not letting on. Like it had a hidden meaning or something.
Why am I best friends with this girl?
I choked on my own spit.
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