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Rating
Mature
Chapters
34
Words
129,395
Characters
Dumbledore, Lupin, McGonagall, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew, OC
Primary Relationship
Sirius/OC
Secondary Relationship(s)
James/Lily, James/OC, Other Pairing
Genre(s)
Humor, Romance
Era
Marauders
Advisory
Strong Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature, Substance Use or Abuse, Sensitive Topic/Issue/Theme
Story Reviews
865
Status
Completed
First Published
2009-08-17 1:24am
Last Chapter
2011-07-23 10:38am
Last Updated
2011-07-23 10:38am

Track This Story: Feed

Ch. # Chapter Title Word Count Reviews
1 Not the Same After That

“Heard what?”

“That I have procured a girlfriend.”

Lily let out a low laugh and examined him, not quite sure if she believed him or not.  “Oh yeah Potter, who?”

“It’s,” James’s eyes scanned the girls in the common room.  The girls were pushing past each other and pulling each other’s hair in order to get in James’s eyesight.  James’s eyes then stopped, and he was looking right at me.

No.  No. No no no no no no.

1,527 79
2 The Sound of Settling

Boys’ dormitory.

More specifically the Marauders’ dorm room.

Most specifically I’m in it, with boys.  

2,714 60
3 Fell Down the Stairs

James then steered me towards the Gryffindor table and we all sat down.  There was an awkward silence as we all helped ourselves to food. 

Oh god.

I do not do well with awkward silences.  I always say something stupid.

“Did you know that hippogriff poop is not only an excellent manure but also doubles as some of the main ingredients in facial masks.”

3,951 49
4 Uprising

“Well you don’t seem like you talk, let’s just hope you don’t bite.”

“I’m a piranha,” I said as I chomped my teeth together.

Oh Merlin what the hell did I just do? Did I really just pretend I was a piranha? 

2,137 34
5 Alter the Ending

“And if I don’t?”

 

“Then I will banish you into a world filled with troll boogies.”

3,569 48
6 Until the Morning

What happens after. 

2,152 28
7 Little Lion Man

 Avery and Sirius stumble upon some trouble...

4,195 20
8 Sound the alarm

 “What shall we do with you?” Lucius said as he rounded in on me, the rest of the pack following behind him.

 

“How about the cruciatus curse,” Bellatrix suggested with a maniacal look in her eye.

 

“Too predictable,” Lucius dismissed quickly. “Snape,” he said turning his attention to the greasy haired boy. “I believe it's time you prove yourself. I'm leaving it up to you to decide what to do with her.”

4,367 24
9 These Things Move in Threes

“If you were my girlfriend I wouldn't let you out of my site.”

 

“Well thank Merlin for the fact that James is my boyfriend and not you.” 

4,312 36
10 My Unusual Friend

Theories:

Secretly a woman

Belongs to a secret cult that uses all of his energy. A cult devoted to chocolate. 

3,423 28
11 Snape the Squawking Canary

“Did you hit your head when you fell down the stairs today?”

 

“No, why?” 

2,684 27
12 Halloween

Avery and Sirius finally go to the concert. 

4,528 30
13 The New Heavy

The weeks after the almost, whatever the hell happened in the hotel.

3,090 31
14 You Tried to Turn Away

“Oh yeah?” I said and then wound up my foot and kicked him right in the groin, making him fall to his knees. “Looks like a I got lucky again.”  

4,165 40
15 Slug Club Party

Merlin I look like a monkey. Who the hell invented a bow tie? I'm going to hunt down the person that invented a bow tie and strangle them with their own invention. Let's see if they like their invention after they're dead. 

5,443 30
16 The Secret's in the Telling

 What if she's already grown bored of me? I'm charismatic! I don’t need to have a multi-dimensional personality, I've got my charms to get by. And if Avery isn't satisfied with that then she can leave.

5,991 21
17 The New Year

 “Lily leant me her bra, isn't she a sweetheart?” Sirius said looking over at Lily and blowing her a kiss.

6,141 22
18 Sneak Attack

 “Er, Remus, having some girl troubles are you?”

 

2,954 16
19 Blame It On the Changes

  “Maybe I should hire a body guard.” I responded cheekily.

 

“Or maybe you should stop being so accident prone.”

 

“Well if that's the case I better stop hanging around you guys, you seem to cause trouble wherever you go.”

3,782 14
20 Valentine's Day

 Valentine's day...

4,422 13
21 In the Backseat

In the Backseat...

4,664 11
22 Science of Fear

Science of Fear...

3,480 22
23 You Tried to Turn Away

You Tried to Turn Away... 

3,180 16
24 Spit on a Stranger...

 Spit on a Stranger...

3,914 15
25 There Goes the Fear Again

There Goes the Fear Again...

5,065 17
26 Massive Attack

 Trouble at Hogsmeade

4,524 23
27 Crash into me

Crash into me 

4,198 14
28 The funeral

The war becomes real. 

3,244 13
29 First Day Of My Life

 "Babes, why don't you unbutton your shirt in my presence?" Sirius asked edging towards me and playing with the collar of my shirt.

I swatted his hand away, "because I have other things on my mind aside from your sexual satisfaction."

3,791 11
30 Nose-Bug

 "He's been a spy for me many years, one of my most valuable members."

"No," I whispered, the reality crashing down on me. I swiftly stood up from my chair and started pacing the room. I was grabbing at my hair, trying to distract myself from screaming and keeping the tears that were begging to fall from going down my cheeks.

 

3,933 10
31 Annabelle and Snuffles

 Moody looked at me for a moment before a grimace that I assume to be a smile formed on his lips. "Aye, I like her Albus, she's got a mouth on her."

5,618 11
32 NEWT's

 "I didn't know it! I completely forgot. I'm going to fail my exam and never go anywhere in life, I'll be flipping burgers for the rest of my life!" Lily wailed dramatically, laying her back on the ground and putting the book over her face. "I should just give up, this won't work. I accept my life as an old hag with millions of cats and no teeth."

"You'll still have me babes," James said kneeling over her and removing the book from her face.

"Oh great, at least I've got my childhood boyfriend." 

2,720 15
33 Graduation

 The gang says goodbye to Hogwarts.

3,442 14
34 Epilogue

 This is the actual goodbye.  

2,075 23

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