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    Rating
    15+
    Chapters
    16
    Words
    36,437
    Characters
    Harry, Ron, Hermione, Fred, George, Ginny, Oliver, OC, OtherCanon
    Primary Relationship
    Other Pairing
    Secondary Relationship(s)
    Harry/Ginny, Ron/Hermione, OC/OC
    Genre(s)
    General, Humor, Romance
    Era
    Hogwarts
    Advisory
    Mild Language, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature, Contains Slash (Same-Sex Pairing)
    Story Reviews
    159
    Status
    Work In Progress (WIP)
    First Published
    2008-06-01 3:37am
    Last Chapter
    2009-02-16 7:41pm
    Last Updated
    2009-04-01 10:10pm

    Track This Story: Feed

    Ch. # Chapter Title Word Count Reviews
    1 Lassie was a dog you idiot

    I love Roger Davies and I hope Oliver Wood chokes on his stupid accent and dies—FINE Katie! I don't have any death wishes for Oliver (hehe).

    1,080 9
    2 One Happy Guy!

    Somewhere in Scotland, Oliver Wood is reading the headline of the Prophet and laughing his gorgeous arse off.... he may be my arch nemesis, but I'm not blind people!

    2,480 5
    3 Cue the Spirit Fingers

    I’ve decided that if Wood gets to have a bloody compound, I sure as hell want one too! I’ll house gorgeous Quiditch players, whorship Roger Davies, and have Oliver as my personal slave.


    Ewww George! Not that kind of slave you perv!


    xShuddersx


    Bad mental images.

    1,235 2
    4 Rogering

    Is it wrong to be on a first name basis with your personal stalker and have a tiny crush on him? Probably, but hey it works for Kates and Ollie!


    Cheese and rice, I was just kidding Katie! Put the quaffle down!

    1,184 2
    5 Holy Bologna!

    Leanne & Satan 4eva!
    Ol & Kat 4eva!!!!!
    Ruthie & Chuck 4eva and eva and eva and eva and eva....

    2,318 4
    6 I'll be your Miss Piggy if you'll be my Kermit

    Kermit makes me silly with girlish aspirations. If I was a frog I would sooo tap that.


    No Wood, you’re a toad.

    2,783 3
    7 A Keeper

    Oliver’s POV!

    She threatens people in her sleep.

    It’s kinda cute, in a creepy way.

    2,803 7
    8 Meet the Mates

    Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park.Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park.Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park.Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park.Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park.Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park. Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park.Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park. Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park. Piddle-Puddle-Paddle-Piddle Park.

    Try saying that ten times fast!

    3,193 8
    9 Cry Baby, Cry

    WHERE IS THE BLOODY BOX OF TISSUES!


    Hmm, the last time I saw it I was throwing it at Wood’s head.


    Oh dear lord. His head is huge. The box probably bounced off and is in Cuba right now.  Fidel Castro has my box of tissues.


    Oh, hell no.

    2,114 10
    10 Oxy Sans Moron

    It’s a proven fact that moron runs in my family.


    Look at my Uncle Rico! He went to jail for trying to light one of the Buckingham Palace guards on fire!


    Oh yeah, being obsessed with fire also runs in the family too.

    2,040 10
    11 You take the 'C' out of Class

    Ruthie’s got sass,


    Katie wants to be Ollie’s lass,


    and Wood is a big fat a-.... well you know.

    2,410 10
    12 I miss the way you babble

    Ba, ba, da BAAA!


    Ladies and gentlemen, boy and girls, I am proud to present the misteress of mixtures, the beastiest of brewers, the princess of Potions.....



    ...........MISS RUTHIE SPARKS!!!


    (Insert loud cheering and random male Quidditch players ripping their shirts off)


    Sniffle, sniffle... I’d like to thank all my friends and family, my BFF Sev, and Oliver Wood for always inspiring me to create concoctions to help with my evil plots against him. Thank you so much! I love you guys! No, not you Wood.

    2,401 14
    13 Doing Naughty, Naughty Things

    I just have one thing to say:

    In your dreams Oliver Wood!

    2,570 12
    14 Oh Happy Day!

    "Take your clothes off!"

    "Pardon," I asked shocked.

    "Take them off now," Oliver demanded gesturing to my nightie.

    Dear lord baby Jesus.

    2,452 11
    15 With a Mustache

    "It's not your fault you lost baby Jesus sweetheart, but-"


    “I DIDN’T LOOSE HIM! HE RAN AWAY!”



    Ahh... there is nothing like childhood memories.

    2,552 7
    16 Just Because

    He ripped his arm away from me, “Irrational, irrational!”


    “Yes and also insane.”


    “Insane, insane!”


    Okay, is he just going to repeat everything I say!?

    2,822 45

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