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1. Who I Thought I Was
:.~.~~.~.: I am a trained killer, taken into the arms of the Dark Lord even before I'd owned my first wand. I'm someone who takes her job to heart with the utmost respect. But what happens when love gets in the way of everything that I'd thought I'd always wanted? What happens when nothing in my life is ever as it seems? A HP/OC romance
2. Pushing Enemy Lines
"What? Am I supposed to throw a parade because of who you are? Listen I'm sure that you have enough people in your fan club, I just figured that you didn't want another teen girl fussing over you and making you feel like some alien. If I was wrong on any account, let me know." I turned back to him them seeing that none of them were capable of shutting their mouths fully.
3. Hostility, Tension, and Arguments
My smile widened, the trio seemed to be staring at me in horror. "Do me a favor and get the hell out of here. You may think that you are something special, especially with you father being who he is, but in all honest reality you're a prick and just being within five feet of you makes my stomach churn." That smile that I wore turned into an even sweeter smile as I tilted my head to the right just a bit.
4. Ebbing Away At the Hatred
Being with Potter was a feeling that I'd never felt before, but I felt in a way childish. We continued to play these childish games, finding reason after reason to hate each other. It was as if I was four once again and throwing a fit because I had to take a bath…not that that was a problem any longer, but it's how I felt.
5. A Torrid Affair?
Madison and Harry grow closer as they learn to get along while Madison faces the music of the Sorting Hat.
6. The Past: Shaping Who We Are
I was going back and I hadn't the ability to stop it. I was headed back to a time where the world sat in peace. The Dark Lord was still in ruins, or so they assumed, and everyone was just more confident. Fudge was even attempting to do his job. But more importantly I was going back for a girl, a dead girl, the same girl that I used to be.
7. Of Stars and Weddings
My hands were bawled into tight fists, my knuckles turning white. There was something wrong with me. I hadn't been the same cold heartless bitch that I was when I boarded that damn train. Something had happened within the past several hours that had changed who I was and who I thought I was. How was that possible?
8. Breaking Down at the Foot of the Enemy
"Nothing's wrong. I'm fine, Harry." My voice was strong, not only to my pleasure but to my surprise. I mean I had always been able to keep a straight voice before today, but with these recent events I wasn't really sure as of what I could and couldn't do anymore.
9. Sleeping With the Enemies?
The silence was broken by incoherent mumblings by him then followed by me. I had no idea what I was trying to say and by the sound of it I hadn't the faintest idea on what he had been trying to say. Instead we both just continued to make no sense whatsoever, noise was the only thing that fell out of our mouths: not words but noise.
10. Way to Start the School Year
I contemplated our situation. The room was dark; we had managed to buy some time hiding behind this desk. Harry was lying directly on top of me. I had no idea what spells were being shot at us. Harry's lips were only inches from mine. I couldn't spit out a spell that would demolish the school. Harry – damn it Madison, stop thinking about him for two damn seconds and think.
11. A Cross between Freakish and Godly
I was being held up to some pretty high standards. And the fact that I was being held up to that many standards made me look between the cross of a freak and a god when I felt farthest from both. It seemed as if the question on everyone's mind was now "what is she going to do next?"
12. Plenty of Mistakes
Voldemort's mind raced at the conviction as a small upward twitch hit the right corner of his lips, and then it twitched a second time, then a third before a small smile formed. And it was in that instant that he made the mistake of falling into Lucius' suspicions and blowing them into something huge to fit the moldings of his plans.
13. Another Attempt at Happiness Shot Down
We were close, so very close. I closed my eyes knowing that I was following orders but for every wrong reason. I wasn't going to kiss him because Voldemort wanted it, I wasn't doing it to gain his trust and loyalty so that I could bring him to death. I was going to kiss him because he wanted it, because at that moment there is nothing else that I'd rather be doing.
14. Testing the Waters
"Look, Knighting," I tightened at the sound of my original last name, "I know who you are. And you are stepping on the wrong toes, sweet. You overstepped your boundaries on the train and I'm going to let you know that I'm not taking it. I'm a male and face it, within our society you're a peasant." He smirked, believing that his words had an effect, and they did, just not a positive one.
15. Daring to Tell the Truth
"Phfff," I turned to look at Harry who had just spurted out a mouthful of pumpkin juice out of his mouth which now lay as droplets on the wood floor. His mouth was wide in shock as he looked on at the two boys heatedly. "What kind of question is that? You wasted the first question of the game on something that we already-"
16. The Third Time's a Charm?
He threw the short cigarette stub onto the ground before spotting his target leaving the Ministry building where he would follow. Keep a shadow's distance, don't look suspicious, blend in. The rules were always the same, never to be broken, never to be tampered with, that is unless you want to get caught. But a true assassin never really wants that: a psychopath, yes, but an assassin, no.
17. Death Is a Funny Thing…
Hermione's head was in my lap as I absentmindedly began to run strands of brown hair through my fingers. I dared not say a word, not fully trusting my ability to speak. Besides, what was I supposed to say? Would anything that I could say make any difference? None of my words were powerful enough to turn back time, none of them.
18. Downhill Head First
"Did Dumbledore decide on your replacement for Head Boy yet?" Of course Hermione saw this all as strictly business. That girl eats, drinks, and sleeps responsibility. I was going to make something of her yet. I shook my head momentarily, where had that last thought come from?
19. A Child of Nightmares
He knew of her alliance to the dark side, after all, he hadn't been born yesterday though he would have given anything to reclaim the years of his youth. He knew that she thought he was clueless, but he wasn't. He sighed then, closing his dull eyes as he began to rub the area of skin above his temples in slow circular motions. He wasn't sure how much more he could endure. But he knew that the fate of the world may very well be in a very worse condition than he.
20. Now Who's the Beast?
Of course a repetitive question was in order, so why the hell hadn't I thought of that before I asked the question. This man before me just spilled his story to me without any remorse and most importantly without any falsehood. So what was I supposed to say? That my parents were gone, I faked my death to run away from the foster home of hell, joined the Dark Lord, killed dozens of innocent people, failed to save a child, and was now assigned to Harry Potter? No, I don't believe that that would set right. Maybe a fraction of the truth will suffice. But even the thought of it made me uneasy.
21. If Only
"And as I've already promised you, the vampires are in complete support of the contract that we have all signed. And though it is customary to sign these things in blood we knew that you wouldn't entirely want that." Victor was showing two rather sharp canines in his very toothy smile. If he was lying, well Dumbledore couldn't even fathom the idea. But he knew that they would be a very great asset for the side of good. He just prayed that the agreement that they're reached would be followed through.
22. Boyfriend? I Think Not
"Ah, the sweet taste of beautiful, I've missed it so!" My left eyebrow rose in complete bewilderment. Where had that come from? But as if reading my thoughts Victor leaned in closely so that his breath was tickling my ear. "That Potter kid that you enjoy so much is watching us. I could feel his pulse from here. Let's give him something to watch. Jealously is always a fun emotion."
23. Paint Me Brown and Lavender
Damn it, she looked so familiar, as if I'd seen her somewhere before. But my memory was impeccable; I would remember meeting a girl with such a bubbly air, wouldn't I? But if that were the case then why was it that I could place her face with a name? It was clearly uncharacteristic of me.
24. A Puppet's Game
"They wouldn't want that, Harry. They wouldn't want me to reflect on everything that couldn't be but everything that could be. They'd want us to be happy, to do the things that make us feel as if we were at the top of the world though we all know that we'll never be invincible." It was true, I knew that much. And for the longest time I believed that my job did make me feel at the top of the world, I had yet to process that I was only playing a puppet's game.
25. Chess Anyone?
This was all like some big chess game to him, something that he was extremely good at. And the way he saw it, she'd just lost her queen and was now running in defense.
26. The Power to Destroy
He didn't seem to notice me, his nose practically attached to a Potion's book. He was smirking over something and at the moment I wanted nothing more than to wipe that petty smirk off of his face. And I wondered if it were possible to do so: to tear the lips straight off of a person. Many people would have called the thoughts psychopathic, and maybe they were…Hell, if I were in the right state of mind I would have thought that I'd belonged in some hospital where pillows were attached to the walls.
27. The Monsters That Live Within
I mean look at me. Look at where I was and can you honestly tell me that I have the right to yell at Malfoy for doing and believing the same things that I had? If anything I was worse than he will ever be, so what does that make me? What kind of low life scum does that make me? Hell, I don't even deserve these people's love, kindness, or respect.
28. The Knowledge of Fear
"And what scares you, Miss Bones?" I sat there in my seat with my eyes staring straight at the ground feeling completely incompetent. I didn't know how to answer that question and it was as if every possible answer led to another trap. How could he ask me such a question? He knew what was on the line! But I had to answer, and I did.
29. Rising Up In Society
The definition of teamwork is "a cooperative effort by the members of a group or team to achieve a common goal." Now the common goal was simple, win at any costs. So was I to sacrifice my glory for the team so that it would be shifted upon the girl that was so eager for Harry's attention? But then would I sacrifice the team for my own foolish thoughts? Decisions, decisions…
30. Remember That Post-Game Stunt?
"Oh don't think your post game actions didn't go unnoticed either, Madison." I turned to Lavender with an unattached jaw and a look that purely stated don't-go-there. But that phrase alone elicited a questioning glance out of Hermione. Apparently she had been just as occupied as I was after the game and hadn't noticed two of her friends embracing in such a manner.
31. The Art of Seduction
"So how much longer do you think it'll be before they actually allow us to apologize to them?" Despite the seriousness of my question I found myself completely relaxed and content in the arms of my boyfriend.
32. Warm Snow
Without much less a sound I found myself hurdling into thin air, pouncing at my victim as an "oof" came sprawling out his lips. From there it was a tumbling fest. Somehow I hadn't managed to see the trap that he'd created for me. He knew that I was there and he knew that I'd try to take him by force so he stood in front of a steep hill. How had I not seen it? The mistake left our bodies tumbling towards school grounds.
33. Why Be Nervous?
"Well unlike you, Harry, I have something to be extremely worried about. Madison likes you already, and I, well I have to make sure that tonight goes perfect!" Harry could see the nervousness in his best friend's eyes and was starting to feel bad for the guy. Hermione was a perfectionist, so it only made sense that she'd want tonight to go perfectly. He had some large shoes to feel.
34. Reassuring Doubt
He hadn't drunken the sweet nectar of life for two weeks now, weakening him more than severely. He needed that fiery red liquid in order to survive and he wasn't sure how much longer he could hold out. So one could imagine his inner turmoil as he sat there, arms chained to the wall, just watching Bellatrix's pure as red blood drip effortlessly from off her wrist and onto the undeserving dungeon floor. His mouth watered as its intoxicating smell filled his nostrils.
35. Doing One's Job
I watched with envy was Ron's mother pulled each of the four into what looked like a bone crushing hug, smothering them with love and praise as she'd held each of them. In that moment I'm not sure what I felt more of, envy or out of place. Hell, I didn't belong here. I belonged back at Hogwarts with the things that cared: my Potions and Transfiguration books.
36. The <i>Civateto</i>
Victor's eyes widened as he saw a pair of black eyes looking helplessly into his own. He could detect the fear that was surrounding his favorite cousin and in returned it installed in Victor a sense of high alert. "Kali, what's wrong?"
37. Influential Words of Wisdom
It was odd, this feeling that was running through me. It's something that I'd never felt before, this coming from a girl who lost her virginity to a person whom she thought herself in love with. But it was like Harry was this sort of drug that I just couldn't get enough of. I craved him on a daily basis. At night I would wake up in a sweat, slipping out of a dream of him and I that I shouldn't have been having in the first place. And if it wasn't for the fact that I'd killed people then I knew anyways that I'd be going to Hell with these not-so-pure thoughts.
38. A Very Harry Christmas? Part I
Christmas, the joyous occasion celebrated by many boys and girls was never an event that I found myself participating in. The holiday normally just consisted of sleeping in 'til noon and not getting my ass kicked by Anthony who found the holiday some great day where he could find himself an extremely drunk witch that would have no recollections of anything when she'd awake the next day. So imagine my surprise when at five-thirty in the morning I'm being shaken awake by two identical mischief makers who are intent on opening presents the moment they wake up.
39. A Very Harry Christmas? Part II
The air was thick around the dinner table that evening as I sat beside Harry, slowly placing pieces of the Christmas feast into my mouth. I couldn't even savor the delectable taste as it'd hit my tongue as only one thing was capable of maintaining my attention. The memory of just forty-five minutes before.
40. These Feelings That We're Feeling
My right eye twitched at the bright light that was now spewed upon it, the sunlight not easing up one bit. I went to move but found myself unable as a pair of arms encircled my waist and pulled my back into its chest. Harry had still yet to awaken and I didn't want to have to do it so I laid still, mind wandering.
41. The Truth Straight and Plain
He couldn't win either way. He'd sealed his destiny though the outcome had been unavoidable. Back then he'd had to kill to survive. And to kill was a sin, something that would send him straight to Hades while at the same time, so would suicide. And to not kill a human for feed would be suicide. So either way the devil had condemned him to Hell. But the least he could do while he was here was try and make things right. He could try to save the world.
42. It's Begun to the Sound of Magic
There it was again. The shrill eruption of some unknown sound as it caused me to once again take hold of my ears. The sound stopped once again but the throbbing of my head had yet to cease as I drew in long steady breaths. What was happening to me?
43. What Word Is Shouted Before New Years?
But that wasn't the only reason that Ron had felt somewhat distressed over the highly celebrated event. The biggest reason of all was standing at the other end of the room with her curly brown hair running down her back, her skirt showing a classy revelation of the legs he's dreamed she'd had, as she talked to Madison with a grin plastered onto her face.
44. Not the Only Bad Guy
So this is what I figure, there is always a good side and a bad side to everything. There is a yin and a yang, a white and a black, and this situation is just a jumbled mess of everything added together into one huge disastrous pile. And who is supposed to rake up this entire mess so that everyone can once again go back to their lives and live as they had before this? Me, and I have absolutely no idea as of how to do that.
45. Away With What Was Known
Draco on the other hand, up until this very point, didn't believe in God, or Merlin as witches and wizards referred to him. He'd been taught to embrace the evil of this world ever since he could hold a slight yearn of understanding within his developing brain. And in that cynical belief, how could one believe in a thing such as God, the very symbol that stood for the goodness in the world? What he hadn't expected was to have to be the one to kill a martyr who was un-doubtfully a full hearted Catholic who would spend every Sunday at church...
46. Happy Is Shouted Before New Years
"I don't know what you're talking about." But even as Ron spoke the words he knew that he was lying through his teeth. Of course Madison knew, the whole bloody school knew, so why wouldn't Hermione? How could the smartest witch in their school be so oblivious to the obvious signs that stood right in front of her? There was only one reason that he could think of: his feelings went unreturned.
47. It Won't Be Forever
Vito's eyes glazed over at the very thought of his older brother of whom he hadn't seen in nearly five decades. The last memory that he'd had of Victor was him standing over their sister, Victoria's, grave. There had been a blood red rose in his hand as he knelt over her grave praying to God that he'd take their sister's soul into consideration. And as Vito had stood there watching over the scene that he'd named nothing less than pathetic, all he could feel were his own emotions of hatred running deep within him.
48. Ashes, Ashes They All Fall Down
Somewhat long locks of sandy blonde hair fell into his face, surrounding perfectly sculpted high cheek bones and a rather strong chin. He was showing off his perfectly straight white teeth in my direction from which he stood a good six foot three leaning against the wooden frame of his desk. But what got me were those almost grey hypnotic eyes that I knew in my mind that I'd never in my life forget.
His hands wrapped around her wrist, squeezing tight against them as he pried her hands from off of his throat. He needed to hear her gasp for pain, he needed to see this barrier that she'd put up between the two of them fall, but most of all he needed her as a decoration on his mantle and an accessory to his bed.
50. Changes or a Repeat of the Past?
The Common Room fire was slowly dying out, the crackle of wood took hold of his hearing as did the smooth breathing of the girl atop him. He was laying at the end of the couch with one leg on the ground and the other dangling further down. His arms were wrapped around Madison who seemed to have fallen asleep carelessly on top of him with her head nuzzled in the crook of his neck and her back pressed against his chest which was moving steadily with each and every breath that he drew and exhaled.
51. Early Morning Escapades Part I
"You know exactly who I'm talking about! Don't act as if I don't know who plays on which side, I'm still a Death Eater for Christ sakes! Do you need to see my own personal version of a dark mark to prove it to you? I know exactly who my fellow Death Eaters are so don't try and sugar coat it for me! Why would you let Jonathan, or Professor 'Knighting' in here without searching into his past records, his history? We might as well let convicted felons teach us how to conjure dangerous potions!"
52. Early Morning Escapades Part II
He was back in school, away from the constant droning of his father's voice as he would sing of the Dark Lord's praises as if he were a canary. And he would talk obsessively over the "New World". He made it seem as if it were this glorious place but Draco had trouble seeing it through those same rose colored glasses. Instead he couldn't help feel that this "New World" would just be the same as this one except everyone would be controlled by one man, the Dark Lord. It was just as if they were the Nazi army and the Dark Lord was their Hitler...they were all drones of this Aryan race.
53. Conflicting Emotions
I needed to ask him a million questions. I needed to know why the war started, what it led to, whether he still experienced hate, whether dark magic had a play in all of it. But the question that seemed to be bothering me the most was who this Violet person was. And it might have been my reflection on these questions that kept me up until I watched the color of the sun hit the sky. Or perhaps it was just me. It's not as if I'd been getting any real sleep as of late.
54. The Choice of Sheep
Malfoy looked as if he were squirming in his seat. He didn't even look like himself. Normally he would be boasting about his ranks in their society, bursting with pride but now he looked uncomfortable, like he didn't want to be put on the spot, almost as if he didn't want to be the one who really was a Death Eater in training.
55. Crossing Over
At this moment he had no idea who it was that he hated more: the Dark Lord, his father, or himself. It was like this small trinity but the trinity from Hell. They were what was evil, not the rest of society. He just wished that he would have known that before he'd taken the lives of three innocent people, four if one were to count Blaise's killing as his own fault.
56. The Beginning of the End Part I
"Apparently you haven't heard the word then." Draco turned to face Nott who held a smile on his face clearly stating that he knew something that everyone else did not. And that thing rested in between his right thumb and index finger. "We're on the move again, and this time we're going to be taking the world by storm."
57. The Beginning of the End (Part II)
Then it happened, there was a huge force being exerted onto his chest, pushing him back onto the floor, upon collision he found it hard to breathe. It was as if a huge weight now lay upon his chest. His head buzzed and he could hear the gasps of the people that surrounded him. It was the end, he could feel death around him, but he never expected it to feel anything like this.
58. In All Honesty…
"Damn it!" I screamed and ran out the doors that I had entered. What I had just done could be my unraveling, how was I supposed to explain this. Within hours the entire castle would know about this short little outburst and look for an explanation, or in most cases they will make them up. Either way it was bad news.
59. Welcome Back
The table was cool on my back, but I did not complain. Instead I watched as five vampires worked quickly to set me up to muggle machines that read my heart beat, my blood pressure, the dream activity. I had been set up to some IVs to keep me from dehydration. Every precaution was being made. My life was in the hand of Romania's finest.
60. In the Course of a Month
"What do you mean you don't know where she is?" John cowered under the fierce voice of authority. He stood his ground however and forced his mouth to stay in a straight line. Any sign of weakness would only give the Dark Lord more reason to give him "suitable" punishment.
61. The Powerful Addiction
Objects continued to fly in disarray. It seemed as if everyone was trying to get further into the room to reach me, yet they were fighting against the air as if a brick wall stood in their paths. Their fists slammed forward and stopped abruptly though it appeared as if they hit nothing as one screamed that it was getting harder and harder to breathe.
62. Enhanced Senses
He walked down the hallway, a feeling of emptiness overcoming him. It had been five weeks and he had yet to hear a single word from her, though he was continually convincing himself that he didn't care about her. She could drown in a lake for all he cared, but the thought of such a thing brought fear to him. He couldn't understand it, how he could hate her yet couldn’t stop thinking about her at the same time. Truth be told, he felt as if the steam were blowing off and all he cared about now was seeing Madison again.
63. The Death Eater Inside Me
Hermione stood there, looking over the scene that had just taken everyone to the breaking point. She didn't know what to say or how to feel. The only thing she knew was that this scene no longer required an audience. And as she threatened everyone with detention if they didn't leave she could feel the tension surrounding her small group of friends.
64. The Division of Sides
Madison laughed, seemingly easing down Ron's tension. "Ginny really isn't my type, Fred and George wouldn't be able to handle me, Bill has Fleur, and Charlie isn't exactly in my age range. I'd say that we have nothing to worry about. And if we do, I might off myself before you get the chance."
65. Rules of the Jungle
"Look, Potter, I didn't say that you could stay here to stare at the back of my head so be a good little monkey and perform your tricks then go." Harry could see Ron and Dean smiling at one another even as Harry took the seat near Madison.
66. Questionable Trust
"Keep pushing me to the dark side, werewolf, and then your convictions about me might actually become true." I, like him, had whispered only loud enough for the two of us to hear.
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