Quibbler Exclusive: An interview with the hot new singer, Stubby Boardman. QE: First off, Mr. Boardman, I would like to welcome you and thank you for participating in this interview on behalf of our readers. SB: Thanks for the invite. QE: So, I think the question on every witch’s mind is, are you single? SB: Haha! Yes, I am single. But, sorry ladies, I’m not really looking. I sort of like the loner stance. QE: What a shame! I guess the other huge question on everyone’s minds is: Do you know Harry Potter? SB: Harry Potter? Yes, I know him. I was good friends with his father once. Nice lad. QE: Nice lad, true. Is that all you can say about him? Or do you not know him very well? SB: Unfortunately, for the beginning part of his life I wasn’t around much, as I lived up north. And for most of his later years in school I was on the go a lot. QE: Because of your music? SB: …Yeah. It kept me from settling down really. QE: It sounds as if you consider your music a burden. SB: Nah, I don’t think of it like that. I just sometimes find myself wondering how different my life might be if I hadn’t done certain things. Everyone wonders that at some point. QE: You have a point. Mind sharing with us what it is you did that you think you might have changed? SB: Wow, that’s hard to narrow down. A wise man once told me that everything we do has such diverse effects, that changes involving just one action are not imaginable. Granted, certain ones stick out in one’s mind. There are certain people I may have treated differently, others I may have trusted more, or less… QE: Sounds almost like a confession there, Mr. Boardman. Any specifics you wish to share? SB: Not without revealing the names of others who may not want to be brought up. QE: I see. Ah well, the past is the past and cannot be changed. So, getting back to the Potter family, you said you were good friends with James, did you know any of his other friends? SB: I did know a few, yes. But in his later years, James didn’t associate with too many people because of the war. QE: Did you ever know Sirius Black? SB: I think I may have met him once or twice. QE: Take no offense, but you bear a shocking resemblance to him. SB: So I’ve been told. But what is similarity, really? It does not make us the same. QE: That is true, Harry Potter and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named shared several similarities, but look what came of that. Have you seen Harry since the end of the war? SB: A couple times, but he primarily wishes to be left alone. He’s taking a few years to enjoy his life, without the tyranny of those horrid relatives or the pressure of the war. QE: Understandable I’m sure. Not that our readers wouldn’t love to know how he’s been. He took on quite a bit last year, battling You-Know-Who. Were you part of that battle at all? SB: I did all that I could, as would any self-respecting-non-evil wizard. However, my lifestyle being what it is, I was forced to stay off the radar for awhile. QE: Care to elaborate? That was a bit vague… SB: Well, the last thing that was needed was a musician tagging along. Harry’s movements would have been easy to figure out if a load of groupies were accompanying us everywhere. QE: I see. Unfortunately, that’s all the time we have. Thank you for joining us Mr. Boardman— SB: Stubby will do. QE: --Stubby, rather. Join us next week when we interview a young lady who claims to have captured the elusive Crumple Horned Snorkack.
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