Warning: Sensitive and Mature content


“James?” I called out.

I looked around at my surroundings. I could tell that I was in a muggle hospital room. No one was around though. Not in my room, not in the halls, not at the nurses’ station either. I was alone for some reason. I ripped the muggle equipment off me and walked over to the door. I peeked out, looking for anyone. Not a single soul in sight. I started to make my way down the hospital hall.

“Hey Belle.”

I spun around, finding myself coming face to face with Albus Potter.


“Oh Merlin, I’m dead, aren’t I?” I asked.

I had to be dead. How else could I be speaking to a dead man. I died and Al was sent to collect my soul.

“You aren’t dead.” Al said. “You’re unconscious in the hospital. You’re like half dead.”

“Then why are you here?” I asked confused.

“To help you decide.”

“Decide? Decide what?” I asked in a panic. “What the hell is going on.”

“Do you remember what happened Belle?” Al asked.

I shook my head.

“No, I just remember James and I were on our way to visit you.”

“James hit a patch of black ice on the way.” Al explained. “You guys slid across the road into oncoming traffic. You got most of the impact.”

“I don’t understand how I have a decision though.”

“Do you want to go back to the living or do you want to cross to the other side?” Al asked.

“I have a choice?” I was confused.

 Al nodded his head.

“Did you have a choice?” I asked.

“Yes.” Al answered simply.

“Why did you choose death then?”

“Because if I chose life I would’ve been in a world of misery.” Al said. “I know I destroyed you guys emotionally, but I had to.”

“Will I be in a world of misery if I chose life?” I asked.

“Yes.” Al answered.

I thought about how heartbroken James would be if he lost me so shortly after his brother. How devastated he would be about losing our baby too if I died. I wasn’t ready to leave. Whatever misery that may come to me, I knew I was strong enough to withstand it.

“I want to go back.” I decided.

“Are you sure?” Al asked.

I nodded.

“Okay then.” Al said with a nod. “Until next time Belle.”

“Wait!” I cried out, grabbing at him.

I pulled Al into a bear hug and squeezed him for as long as I could.

“I miss you Al.”

“I miss you too Belle.”

My eyes flew open. I checked my surroundings. It was the room I was just in not that long ago. Except this room had sounds and people moving around me. I looked over to my right. I watched the nurse check my vitals and scribble them down in her notes. I looked over to my left. James sat slouched over in the chair next to my bed.

“James.” I croaked.

I saw him open his eyes and look at me. His eyes met mine and he broke out into a large smile.

“Belle, thank Merlin, you’re awake.” He said.

The nurse from my right stopped what she was doing and leaned over the bed to check me. She shined her little pocket light in my eyes and some other little tests.

“She seems okay.” The nurse said. “I’ll go grab the doctor to come check on her.”

I watched as she left the room. I shifted my attention back over to James. He looked so thrilled to see that I was okay. Yet, I could tell that there was something off with him. That he was hiding something under all that happiness.

“James, what happened?” I asked.

His smile fell from his face. He reached forward and grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly.

“Belle, I’m so sorry.” He said. “I lost control of the car when I slid on some ice.”

“But I’m okay, right?” I asked. “I can walk and shit?”

“Yeah, the doctor said you have a concussion and just a cut from when your head hit the dash board.”

“And the baby?” I asked.

James looked down at the bed. He avoided my gaze.

“James, what about that baby?” I demanded.


“Just tell me!” I cried. “Just tell me.”

“You received most of the impact from the crash.” James said.

I felt horrible. He looked like he wanted to cry.

“Your body took in most of the shock. It caused the baby to become distressed.”

“But is she okay?” I asked.

“Belle, it was too much for her. She didn’t make it.”

No. No, that couldn’t be true. She’s supposed to be safe. I’m supposed to protect her.

“Get out.” I growled.


“Get out!” I screamed.

I flew my hand over to the side of my bed, hitting the call nurse button repeatedly. James looked at me before rising out of his seat. He took one more look at me before walking out of the door. I rolled over to my side, curling up into a ball. She was gone.

I heard the door open again and I quickly rolled over to see who it was. The nurse who was in here earlier entered, with the doctor behind her.

“How are you feeling Isabelle?” The doctor asked.

“Horrible.” I replied.

“Understandable.” The doctor mused. “You’ve suffered a lot.”

“Did I really lose my baby?” I asked.

“I’m sorry Isabelle, but yes.” The doctor said.

I looked down at my bed sheets. I was hoping for a different answer. I was hoping James was wrong.

“Isabelle.” The doctor started. “Here’s what’s going to happen over the next couple of hours. We’re going to give you some medicine to start labor. You will then give birth to your baby.”

“You want me to give birth to my dead child” I asked, mortified. “I can’t. I can’t.”

“You can.” The doctor said. “I can see you’re a strong young woman. You can do this.”

*                      *                      *                      *                      *                      *                      *         

The doctor was right. I could. I gave birth to my baby girl. My stillborn baby girl. I was devastated. I cried my heart out. I even let James back in the room. I may have been upset with him but she was his daughter too. The nurse wrapped her up in a tiny little blanket. She handed her to me. Our baby girl was no bigger than the size of my hand. She was so little and fragile. She didn’t belong out here in the world.

I passed our baby girl over to James. I watched his body language as he held her close to him. I could see the tears running down his face. He then handed out daughter back to the nurse. Another nurse came in with a folder. She sat the folder down on my bedside table.

“This is just some paperwork.” She explained. “You don’t need to do it now. Just whenever you’re ready.”

I reached for the folder. James handed it to me and I opened it up. Inside was traditional paper work, a birth certificate, and a death certificate. I slowly pulled them out and grabbed the pen. I signed my name at the bottom of each paper. I slid the papers over to James for him to sign.

“What should we name her?” James asked.

I sat back in my bed. I wasn’t sure what to name her. We thought we had so much time left to figure out a name. We only just found out the sex not that long ago.

“Nevaeh.” I said. “Its heaven spelled backwards. Nevaeh Grace Potter.”

“You want to put Potter?” James asked.

“Of course, why would I?” I asked.

James shrugged his shoulders.

“You seem to blame me for the accident.”

“I’m grieving.” I responded. “I just lost my baby.”

James wrote down Nevaeh’s name on the papers. He didn’t ask any more questions. I watched as he took the stack of papers and placed them back into the folder. There was a knock on the door and the doctor entered again.

“Isabelle, we’re going to keep you here overnight for some observations. If everything looks okay, we’ll be good to release you in the morning.”

I nodded.

“The nurse will be in to give you some medicine to help you sleep.” The doctor said.

James got up out of his chair.

“I’ll let you get some rest.” He said.

He planted a gentle kiss on my forehead before leaving the room. The nurse came in shortly after and gave me my sleeping aid. I took it and curled up under the sheets.

“I told you you would be in a world of misery.”

“Al?” I questioned.

I rolled over in my bed. There was Al, sitting in the seat that James was just in not that long ago.

“I don’t understand. I’m not dead. How are you here then?”

“You’re dreaming.” Al explained.

“Oh.” I whispered. “Did you know my baby was dead when you were talking to me earlier?”


“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked.

“I couldn’t sway your decision. You had to decide if you wanted to go back or not. How death works is a tricky concept. Your injuries could’ve killed you but they weren’t severe enough. This is when Death gives you the option.”

“Have you seen her?” I asked.

“Your daughter? Yes, I have.” Al said. “Death has given her the form of her toddler years. She looks just like you Belle.”

“You’ll watch over her for me, won’t you?” I asked, crying. “Take care of her until I can be with her again?”

“Of course, Belle. Nevaeh and I will always be watching over you and James.”



Author’s Note- Alright guys, what do you think? I’m sorry for this chapter being shorter than my last. I just felt like this was a good stopping point. I feel like a terrible person for ripping the baby away from Belle. Leave a review with your thoughts.


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