A/N: If You Haven't Read The Edited Version Of Chapter One Yet, I Suggest You Do Otherwise Sirius' Behaviour Will Be Difficult To Understand.



December 1978

I stood staring at the body before I turned on my heels and stormed up to the shower. I was in there just long enough to wash my hair and body before I dried myself and chucked on the first pair of jeans I could find and a black jumper. I grabbed some parchment from Remus’ room and wrote a quick letter explaining that something had come up and I wouldn’t be able to go out tonight as planned. Remus’ owl hooted at me as I opened its cage and sent it off with my letter but I was too confused to care. My stomach grumbled loudly but I ignored it as I made my way back down to the living room. The body was still in the exact same position I had left it when I ran from the room less than twenty minutes ago.

“Unconscious bodies don’t tend to move much,” I grumbled to myself as I sat on the armchair facing the fire. I was too scared to utter the counter curse and hear what my visitor had to say so I sat and stared at everything but the body sat in the centre of the room.

At about three in the morning, the eyes flicked open and a hand instinctively went for a wand but I had already taken it. A hand rubbed a temple as if in pain and a low string of curses were uttered until the person realised exactly where they were and that I was sitting there. I felt a flicker of guilt for not waking the person sooner and for the pain I had caused but the anger soon overtook that. I still averted my eyes as the girl pulled herself into a sitting position but I could see from the corner of my eye that her face lit up as soon as she saw me.

“Sirius,” She muttered; her voice was thick with disbelief, joy and surprise.

“Jessica,” I nodded once without even looking at her.

She frowned but didn’t move from her position on the floor.

“How did you find me?” I asked with my eyes still on the fire. My gaze involuntarily flicked up to where a silver photo frame sat on the mantelpiece; Jessica was wrapped up in my arms and we only had eyes for each other. Lily had tried to make me get rid of the picture but I refused. Now, I wish it was gone. I wish that I had no reminders of her in a house she’d never even been in before tonight.

“Didn’t Dumbledore tell you?” She asked. I could tell she was getting annoyed with me but I didn’t have any patience left for her now.

“Obviously not,” I moved my gaze from the fire to the window. I was glad the house was in London and I couldn’t see the stars here. I didn’t want to be reminded of all the nights I had spent staring into space when I was at school. The deep blue sky was filled with grey clouds that seemed to match my current mood.

“I got back from Spain earlier today,” She sounded upset. I glanced at her and saw she had developed a nice tan. “Benjy and I finished our mission and Dumbledore asked to see me. He told me that I could stay here for a while until I was ready to go back home. He knew I wouldn’t want to be there just yet with all my memories,” She dropped her head and I felt a sudden urge to pull her into my arms but I fought it and continued staring out of the window.

“What’s in the box?” I asked, mainly to pull the topic away from her parents and the memories of the few months after they died.

“Nothing important,” She mumbled.

“Well, you can have the first room upstairs on the right. I’m in the first on the left and Remus’ the second on the right. Bathroom’s the one next to my room. Remus will be back tomorrow so you can see him then,” I stood up and made my way to the door. “Goodnight, Jessica.”

I threw myself on my bed and put a silencing charm on the room. “Fucking hell,” I roared as I punched the pillow repeatedly, “Fucking Dumbledore!”

He couldn’t even be bothered to tell me that he was sending Jessica to live here with me! Didn’t even think to tell me that there would be someone staying in my house! I’d managed to only think about her once or twice a day and now she was living with me!

I heard her faint footsteps as she went to her room and shut the door. I removed the charm from my room and lay staring at the ceiling for hours. At about seven, I heard faint sobs coming from the room opposite mine. There was a pang in my chest as I listened and I started humming softly to distract myself from the noise. After a short while, her sobs died away and I slowly made my way across the hallway. I stopped outside the door to check she was sleeping and gently pushed the door open. She was curled up in a ball and her hair was a mess. Her cheeks were tearstained and she was hugging the pillow for comfort. In front of her was the wooden box she had arrived with. The box was still shut but she was holding a letter in her hand. I carefully walked over to her and saw that it was a letter from James. I guessed the box was full of the letters she hadn’t been sent while away. I knew James and Remus wrote at least once a week. Jessica mumbled something and rolled on to her back. I sighed softly before going back to my own room.


“Sirius, get up!” Remus roared as he threw open my door. I grumbled and tried to roll over but he pulled the duvet from me. I sat up and punched his arm before flopping down on the bed with my legs pulled up to my chest.

“I’m fucking cold,” I told him as the room filled with light and my eyes burned from behind their sockets.

“Breakfast’s in ten minutes so you’d better be there,” Remus said loudly before slamming my door.

Dumbledore had moved me and Remus into this house at the beginning of August. I was a bit annoyed at having to give up my flat but Remus could cook and this house had a garage so I moved in without too much fuss. I’d always wondered why there were three bedrooms here but there was never enough time to ask about it at the Order meetings.

I was sat at the table with Remus when we heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Remus put down his paper and looked at me curiously, “Did she stay again last night? I didn’t see her in your room this morning.”

“Nah, she didn’t come last night,” I mumbled and Remus raised his eyebrows. “Something else came up.”

Remus was saved from replying when the door opened and Jessica stood there with her hair and make-up perfectly done. He stared at her for a minute before grinning and lifting her into a hug.

“When did you get here?” Remus asked as he put her down and she made her way to the table.

“Dumbledore sent me last night,” She replied as she poured herself a glass of juice.

“You look different,” Remus observed as she ate.

I looked her over properly for the first time since she’d arrived and I couldn’t help but agree. She’d cut her hair really short before we left school but now it was down to her bum again and looked slightly more tamed than before. She was still tall but she seemed more graceful with her height than she did before. She was a bit slimmer than before but it seemed to me that the weight had moved itself to more pleasing areas; her chest was looking even bigger than before and the curve of her hips was more mesmerising that it had been. She had a deep tan and there was a tiny sparkle in her eyes when she caught me staring at her.

“I missed everyone so much,” She said sadly without taking her eyes off me.

I huffed and dragged my eyes away from her. There was a knock at the front door and Remus excused himself to answer it. We could hear Remus talking to someone and he tried to get the person to leave but the door to the kitchen flew open again.

Crystal Whyte stood in the doorway with a concerned look on her face. Remus stood behind her and was staring at me with a look of regret. It was obvious that he hadn’t wanted to let her in but there is no stopping Crystal once she’s decided something. Internally, I rolled my eyes as I realised all the drama this could bring.

“Sirius, are you alright?” She asked gently before frowning at Jessica. “Who is she?”

Crystal’s light brown hair was pulled into a ponytail that swung as she walked and she wore her favourite lilac robes. Her eyes were lined with black which helped to show off the electric blue of her eyes.

“I’m fine, love,” I told her as she came over to give me a kiss. “She’s Jessica, James’ sister. She came back last night and we weren’t expecting her so you couldn’t come over.”

“I thought something bad had happened. Your letter didn’t say much,” Her eyes kept flicking between me and Jessica, who was looking rather disgruntled.

“I’m sorry,” I gave her a quick kiss before she stood up.

“Don’t worry about it, Sirius,” She straightened her robes. “I just wanted to check you were ok before I went into work.” She walked to the door and stopped next to Remus, “I’ll still see you tomorrow night?”

I nodded and she carried on walking; only pausing once to give Jessica a dirty look. I heard the door shut and the faint pop as she disapparated.


I was curled up on my sofa reading the Daily Prophet when the tapping of an owl at the window distracted me. The bird flew in the second I opened the window and landed on the arm of the sofa. It was Remus’ owl so I knew it would either be Sirius or Remus sending me the letter and a wave of guilt hit me as I hoped that it would be Remus. Sirius had sent me dozens of letters since Jessie had left and I was getting sick of hearing about his problems.


I need to talk to you.


Before I even had a chance to find a quill to write back, there was a knock at the front door. I rolled my eyes as I went to let him in. As usual, he swept into my flat and made his way to the living room. I expected to find him sat on the sofa but when I entered the room, I was surprised to see him pacing in front of the fire.

“I only just got your letter,” I pointed to the owl still perched on the sofa with a small smile. Sirius didn’t even look at me as I spoke and he just carried on pacing. “What do you need to talk about this time?”

Sirius didn’t even flinch at my tone; he was used to it by now. At first, he had been annoyed with the exasperated tone I sometimes used but recently he had just accepted it. I’m sure he knew he was being unfair but putting all his troubles on to me but I knew that I was the only person he could talk to about this.

“She’s back,” Sirius stopped walking and just stared out of the window. “Last night, I heard someone in the living room so I stunned them. It was her. Apparently Dumbledore had decided that she would live with me and Moony but didn’t think to actually tell us before he sent her.”

“Does James know yet?” I asked and he shook his head.

“Lils, she just looks so happy again,” Sirius mumbled. “She smiled more this morning than she has for the past year. I don’t know if it’s because she’s been away or if she’s finally starting to get over everything with her parents.”

“She’ll never get over it,” I told him quietly. Even after all this time, my dad’s death still upset me at random times but I was getting better at hiding it from James. “Maybe the time away has helped her to process things.”

“She was crying last night,” Sirius still hadn’t moved from the window. “She had a box of letters and she fell asleep crying with one of the letters by her side.”

I didn’t even want to know how he knew she had cried herself to sleep but decided not to press it just yet; he’d probably get defensive and bite my head off.

“Does Jessie know about Crystal?”

He nodded, “Crystal came round this morning just after Jessica had come downstairs.”

To be honest, I really disliked Crystal. She was a bit stuck up and could get really possessive of Sirius; she had nearly hexed me the first time she saw me hug him! She was a few years older than us and her bright blue eyes were the only remarkable feature about her. I knew James didn’t like her either but he seemed to be able to tolerate her more than me. Crystal seemed to cling to Sirius whenever they were out together and would force him to baby her. This pissed me off more than anything because I knew she was independent but she seemed to lose herself whenever she was around Sirius. I admired her for working her way up to the Minister’s office but she was too closed minded about the war and tried to ignore it as much as possible.

But Sirius had been a different person since he started dating her a month ago. He’d seemed happier when we were all together but I knew he still thought of Jessie sometimes. I’d told him it wasn’t healthy to have pictures of them together in his house but he’d refused to move them. He seemed to ignore the negative points of Crystal’s personality but sometimes he’d look bored in her company.

James was writing to his at least twice a week to keep her up-to-date with what was going on back here even after Dumbledore told him that she couldn’t read them while on the mission. I had wanted to write but I knew she wouldn’t read it and I had nothing much to say to her. We still hadn’t spoken since our fight after Easter. Obviously, I wanted to get on with her considering she was my old friend and James’ sister but she was just too difficult sometimes.

Sirius vented his frustrations to me for nearly an hour and I practically had to kick him out when I needed to visit my mum. She’d been alone in our old house since Petunia got married in late July and I worried for her. Petunia would often throw in some snide comments about how I should be staying at home with her instead of living in my own flat so I’d been visiting mum at least three times a week.

Dumbledore had suggested that my mum might be at risk considering I was now in the Order and Severus knew all about my home life which could be passed on to those we were fighting against. James and Sirius had come round with me the first time and placed as many protection spells as they could on her house while I distracted her. We had decided not to tell her of the issues in the wizarding world so she wasn’t aware of the spells.


The ticking of the clock seemed much louder than usual as I sat waiting for James. I was terrified of what he would say but also excited to see him after so long. Sure, I’d read his letters and he seemed to get calmer as the months passed but I didn’t know if my reappearance would remind him of his feelings after my departure.

James didn’t know why he was coming to Sirius’ house and I had been sent to wait in my room until his arrival. I think Sirius and Remus wanted it to be a surprise but I just wanted to see my brother again. I could hear James’ voice from downstairs and had enough of waiting. I practically flew down the stairs and burst into the living room with a smile.

“Jam-Jam,” I screamed as I threw myself into his arms. He held me close as I made a noise somewhere between and giggle and a sob. “I missed you so much.”

“Me too, J,” James let out a low chuckle and pulled me close so no one else could hear, “Why did you leave? Why didn’t you tell me?”

I pulled back and looked at him properly; his hair was a messy as usual and his glasses were still a little lopsided but he couldn’t hide the worry in his eyes as he surveyed me.

“Don’t worry about it now, James, it’s not important,” I told him sternly and he nodded. I glanced around the room and caught Sirius rolling his eyes at my words. “Tell me everything I missed,” I commanded James as I slid off of his lap and onto the seat next to him.

We spoke for hours; James told me every detail of the last five months and I told him all about my mission. Sirius had left after about half an hour muttering something about seeing Crystal and I fought the urge to scoff at his words. Remus had stayed a bit but didn’t make any effort to join the conversation which I was glad for; I needed some time to talk with James without any interruptions.

“We had to go to Lily’s sister’s wedding,” James groaned. “The woman has married an idiot. I swear to Merlin, J, he has the brain of a troll. He called me a magician!”

“One of those muggle people that pretend to do magic?” I asked with a frown.

James nodded, “All he talks about is bloody drills and cars. Just be thankful that you never had to meet her sister.”

“I did meet her. The summer between second and third year, I spent the day at Lily’s house and she was there. Petunia looked at me like I was dirtying the house just by standing there,” I laughed. James frowned at me and I guessed his question before he even opened his mouth, “I didn’t tell you about it. I think you were at Peter’s house or something and Lily made me promise not to tell you where she lived.”

“Lily’s mum tried to make Petunia have Lily as a bridesmaid but she refused. Lily was so hurt; she thought they would start to make up now she’s not at Hogwarts anymore. Lily looked so beautiful at the wedding though,” James’ eyes glazed over slightly as he remembered what she looked like.

“Have you proposed yet?”

“It doesn’t feel like the right time yet,” James muttered. I could tell he was nervous and it was obvious that he’d been thinking about it for a long time. “I wanna do it in private. Lily wouldn’t want a big fuss.”

James was actually thinking about what she wants! A year ago, he would have just done it on impulse and not cared about the way she would want to be proposed to but I could see just how much he has changed from that one act. I couldn’t deny that Lily had a good effect on him.


A/N: I'm So Sorry For The Long Wait...I've Just Been Distracted By Supporting Both Of My Countries In The Euro's (Italy And England If Anyone Was Wondering Lol) And Finally Getting To See Nicki Minaj Live In London For The First Time :D. Not Wholly Satisfied With The Chapter But I Had To Post It For All My Faithful Readers Who Had Waited So Long. A Lot Of PoV's In This Chapter So I Hope Its Not Too Confusing For You. Thanks To Michell ginny potter, RJ, Horsepatronus, Shelter And Titch95 For All The Reviews :)...Thanks For Reading And I Hope You Enjoyed This Chapter xx

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