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amazing chapter image by Magic_Phoenix. even the picture makes me hate the guy.


“Fred, are you wearing a turtleneck sweater?” I asked, wondering idly what my life would be like if neither of the Weasleys were in my circle of friends. I’d ask a hell of a lot less questions about questionable clothing choices, that’s for sure.

And people wonder why I’m so fucked up.

“Yep. I thought I needed something to make me stand out a little more, and what could make a person stand out more than a turtleneck and necklaces from the Mr T Collection?” Fred grinned, dropping down on the seat next to me and ignoring the fact that the people on either side of us shuffled away slightly.

I cocked my eyebrow down at the table as Fred scooped a spoonful of spaghetti bolognaise off my plate and dumped it into his bowl.

“Fred, you stand out enough as it is with a voice as loud as yours and a brain as... unique as yours.” Fred looked up from ravaging his dinner to beam at me, red sauce dribbling down his chin and mince stuck to the side of his lip.


That doesn’t make me want to throw up at all.

“Oh, by the way,” Fred said through a mouthful of food, “Scorpius asked me to ask you who you’ve been snogging.” He stared at me with oddly inquisitive eyes.

“I’m not going to tell you.” I said flatly, and Fred shrugged.

“Alright then. I tried.” Fred said, twirling some more of my spaghetti up on his fork and shovelling it into his mouth, our short conversation already forgotten. See, why can’t Scorpius be more like Fred? Honestly, you tell Fred that you don’t want to tell him and everything is perfectly fine, but you tell Scorpius that and he thinks that you’re shagging every bloke on the Slytherin Quidditch team.

Seriously, he actually accused me of that last night.

And now, because Dom was in a bad mood and got a little sarky, he believes that I’m pregnant with some Sixth Year’s baby. Yeah, the last I heard the bloke was in the Hospital Wing, but he might have been transferred to St Mungos in the time since I last checked.

Scorpius is surprisingly nimble with his fists. And his feet. And his wand.

“Oh, have you checked in on that bloke that Scorpius put in the hospital today?” Fred asked, and I wondered idly whether or not he was able to read minds.

“No, I was going after dinner. I sent out for a bottle of Firewhiskey as an apology and it arrived before, so I’m going to pop round and give it to him. I hope he’s awake, I feel so awkward when he’s just lying there.” Fred nodded sympathetically and took a deep swig out of my pumpkin juice.

“I’ll come with you if you want.” Fred offered, and I looked up so I could beam at him.

“Really? That’s really nice of you.” I smiled at Fred, and he grinned back at me.

“Yeah, well Scorpius asked me to spend as much time with you as possible so I could take note on which guys smiled at you, acted overly friendly or stared at your arse when you bent over. So I decided to come with you tonight.”

And with that lovely, sentimental friendship moment ruined, I think I’ll just finish my dinner.


I think James is a little offended. It can’t be very fun when the girl you’re snogging suddenly starts laughing whilst you’re nuzzling her neck. But it was just funny in a kind of sick, twisted way. It wasn’t funny in a humorous way; it was just strange to think about.

“What?” James asked, shooting me an offended glare.

“I was just imaging Scorpius beating you up because he found out that you’ve been snogging me for over a year.” I smirked, and although he tried to hide it I was sure that I saw his face pale a little bit. So much for being a Gryffindor.

“I don’t ever plan on him finding out.” James shrugged nonchalantly, but the fact he wouldn’t look me in the eye kind of ruined the whole ‘I’m not bothered’ attitude he had going on.

“Really?” I asked, biting the side of my lip and widening my eyes, shoving me backwards so I could look at his entire face. “That’s so very, very brave of you.” Heavy sarcasm. I leaned forwards and kissed his ear, moving my lips slightly so I could nuzzle his jawbone.

James chuckled slightly and leaned forwards so that my back against the headboard, my legs still folded on the bed and my arms wrapped around his neck.

“I’m very brave.” He murmured, then he pressed his lips against mine quickly, before leaning backwards again. “I’m so brave you can’t even class me with all the other normally brave people.” James leaned forwards and pressed his lips against mine again.

It would have been a lot more impressive and awe inspiring if his sentence had actually sense.

I told him this.

“That would have been a lot more impressive if your sentence had actually made sense.” James rolled his eyes and then pressed his lips back against mine, hands sliding down onto either of my hips, lifting the hem of my shirt slightly.

“I don’t need to make sense. I’m good looking and my dad is Harry Potter. I could make no sense for the rest of my life if I wanted to.” I rolled my eyes again and ran my finger along the side of his jaw.

“I know that you don’t actually believe that thing about your dad. You’re always moaning about how you live in his shadow.” James’ expression instantly fell a little bit and he ran his hand over the back of his hair.

“Yeah, well. Can we not talk about my dad right now?” James asked.

“Alright, no need to get your thong in a twist, darling.” I kissed his bottom lip as he jutted it out at me. When he didn’t kiss me back I leaned my head back towards the headboard and stared into his face. “Alright, I’ll bite. Why are you in a huffmobile now I mentioned your dad?”

“I just don’t want you thinking about my dad when we’re in the middle of snogging.” James said, and I rolled my eyes.

“Alright, I’m thinking about you without a shirt on. Now, can we get back to snogging?”

James grinned triumphantly and shoved his hands into the roots of my hair, shoving his tongue into my mouth with an intensity that I swear could be classed as violent.

“Much better.” He grumbled against my mouth, pulling open the bottom buttons of my shirt. Honestly, the bloke can get so touchy when people mention his dad.


“Hey James, were you snogging someone last night?” And cue: me choking on my pumpkin juice and consequently spewing half it out over Penny, who was very pale and holding her spoon in shaking hands. Penny jumped slightly and brushed herself off, looking a little disgusted.

“Thanks for that.” Penny grumbled quietly, her eyes swollen up, which made her glare much less threatening.

“Um, no. Why would you think something like that?” James asked, his voice shooting up to an octave that cannot be considered safe in a seventeen year old male.

“Because I woke up in the middle of last night when someone knocked over the lamp next to your bed, and I heard a hell of a lot of moaning. I just hoped that you were snogging a girl.” Fred cocked an eyebrow suggestively.

James followed my suit and spewed a mouthful of pumpkin juice out of Connor. His disgusted expression rivalled that of Penny.

“I mean, yeah, of course I was snogging a girl.” James said, and I choked on my chicken. Great, now I’m pulling a Connor. If I turn blue, please whack me on the back.

“What?” Dom asked. “Who were you snogging?” I shot James a glare so ferocious I nearly burned the flesh off his body.

“Yeah James.” I said tightly. “Who were you snogging?” James assumed the expression of a deer trapped in headlights and quickly crammed a mouthful of Dom’s beef into his mouth, waving his arms around to show that he couldn’t talk.

Eventually he swallowed his food and winced when he noticed that Fred and Dom were still staring at him. Penny and Connor had lost their interest and were now drinking their soups again.

“I was kidding, of course. I wasn’t snogging anyone.” James said, and Fred opened his mouth to ask the question that we all dreaded, but James cut him off before he could even formulate the first word. “I was just snoring. You must not have heard me right, you’re like a zombie when you wake up.”

Fred looked like he was going to object and then closed him mouth, shrugging.

“Alright. I was pretty out of it, I’d spent the night drinking Firewhiskey with this gorgeous bird from Ravenclaw –” And that was right around when I zoned out, no longer interested in whatever Fred had to say. I’m such a fabulous friend.

“Do you guys think I’m a doormat?” Penny asked suddenly, looking up from her soup and staring at us all with oddly bright eyes.

All of us fell silent, none of us wanting to tell her what we really thought.

“No, of course you’re not a doormat.” Fred said softly, his tone immediately changing from bold and obnoxious as he told us about the girl he was snogging last night to soft and gentle, staring at Penny with eyes that were much more sweet and sentimental.

I blinked at him in confusion.

“Then why does he walk all over me?” Her fingers were curled around her spoon, clutching the metal handle so slightly her hands were shaking. Fred suddenly seemed to lose his voice, and he looked down at the table, his lips pressed together and his hands curled into fists.

“Because he’s a grade A arse that doesn’t deserve you, that’s why.” Fred hissed, and his tone was so completely livid Dom shuffled sideways on the bench slightly.

Of the six of us, Fred is the most likely to commit homicide. He may act like a happy-go-lucky charmer, but he can get pretty darn angry when he wants to.

“He told me today that I should count myself as lucky because he’s stayed with me, even though I have less personality than a door handle.” Penny’s hands shook worse than ever and Fred’s fists clenched tighter.

“Did he say anything else?” James asked through gritted teeth.

“He said that one day I was actually going to stand up to someone and grow some balls. Either that or I’m going to stop bugging him and just let him move on with his life without hanging around like some kind of overgrown bat.”

Fred’s goblet smashed into pieces in his hand and sprayed bits of golden metal all across the table.

“I’m going to fucking murder him and pour the pieces into a blender and drink it.” Fred growled, and his eyes flashed so menacingly that I leapt backwards slightly and nearly jumped onto James’ knee.

“No Fred, please, he doesn’t mean it. He’s probably just having a bad day, and I wasn’t really helping by being all persistent and trying to force him to talk to me.” Fred’s eyes flashed brighter and he turned to look around Connor, staring Penny dead in the eye.

“I’m going to tell you this once, and once only Penelope. You are worth one hundred times more than that idiot, and one day you are going to realise this and get with someone who actually deserves you. You are smart, beautiful and the kindest person I know, and he is nothing other than an evil bit of slime that should be stomped into oblivion. You’re perfect. Remember that.”

I breathed out heavily through my nose and resisted the urge to stand up and slow-clap, deciding that Fred would probably sock me in the nose for that.

Since when has Fred gotten all sentimental over things like this? He’s normally the laid back friend that offers to use muscle rather than encouragement.

“Thank you.” Penny murmured, and without another word Fred hauled himself off the bench, stepped around Connor and pulled Penny’s shoulders into his chest in the most awkward hug in the history of the world.

Fred NEVER hugs people, so it’s really unnerving to watch.

“What the fucking hell is going on here? Get your arms from around my girlfriend, or I will club your head in.” Shit no. Hell no. Fuck no. Oh god, please no.

“No.” Dom breathed. I knew that girl was my best friend for a reason.

“Dominique, Summer, if I say step behind me then you do it, got it?” James hissed, and the pair of us nodded. I didn’t miss the way Connor slipped his hand into the pocket that I was almost sure his wand was stored in.

Fred stepped backwards and grabbed his wand out of his back pocket, holding it next to his hip and glaring at Kane Owen, who had stood next to Penny and clicked his fingers, which resulted in her immediately springing out her seat.

He may be a giant prick, but she’s nearly as big an idiot for going along with it.

“So what, are you trying to steal my girlfriend or something?” Kane asked, and his tone was so completely homicidal even Fred took a step back, and his muscles are twice as big.

“She’s my friend and I gave her a hug.” I noticed how he left out the reason that she needed a hug. “Feeling a little insecure, are we?”

“Fred...” Penny moaned quietly, closing her eyes tightly and locking her fingers around Kane’s hand. Something twisted in the pit of my stomach as I stared at Penny.

Her warm brown hair was waving down her pale face, her cheeks splashed with pink, her eyes rounded with deep purple circles from lack of sleep and her bottom lip swollen slightly from where she had been biting it – her nervous habit.

And even with her eyes closed it was impossible not to see the innocence that seemed to radiate off her in waves, projecting such a strange angelic vibe that all you ever wanted to do was protect her and get her away from the bloke standing next to her – who incidentally gave off a vibe of pure evilness (which is now a word).

“You give her a hug again and you’ll be dead before you even say the word ‘insecure’.” Kane threatened, and there was something so completely terrifying about his voice that James grabbed my arm and pulled me onto his knee, shoved me off his knee on the other side of the bench and got his wand out his pocket.

“Dom, get behind Connor.” He murmured, and the pair of them flushed pink as Dom climbed over his knee.

“You think you’re so bleeding hard, don’t you?” Fred hissed, stepping forwards and cracking his knuckles. “You think just because you’ve got a wand and eyes that look like you’ve rolled around in eyeliner you’re somehow some kind of big shot that can actually get away with threatening to kill people?” Fred scoffed.

Kane folded his arms.

“You sound ridiculous, and you cover up the fact that you’re so bloody insecure about the fact your girlfriend is about an inch away from leaving you by threatening to kill people who actually care about her. Just get over your fucking –”

He cut off when Kane stepped forwards and punched him in the nose, knocking him out cold.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the man that Penny chooses to make her boyfriend. Maybe that means she’s a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic.

“Kane!” Penny protested weakly, and pausing only to shoot her a furious glare he stalked away from her, tearing his hand out of hers and jamming his wand back into his pocket. James relaxed slightly and dropped my hand.

Penny dropped to her knees and pulled Fred’s knee onto her lap, brushing his fringe off her forehead, her eyes slightly glossy as she stared down at his face.

I slammed my head down onto the table.

“I hate him.” I murmured into the wood, and James ruffled my hair as a way of agreement. I hate Kane so much it nearly makes my marrow run cold.


“Are you sure you’re alright, you don’t feel faint or anything like that?” Penny asked, running his hand over Fred’s forehead and blinking at him like some kind of Florrie Nightingale.

That’s a strange surname. Nightingale. It’s kind of like the word nightmare. And to be perfectly honest, it would be a bit of a nightmare to have that as your surname.

“No, I feel fine. I was only out for about a minute, I’m absolutely fine.” Yeah, Fred should have realised that Penny would worry the hell out of this when she insisted on sleeping on a camp bed in their dorm in case Fred stopped breathing in the middle of the night due to having some kind of concussion – not that we would know if he did, because he refused to go to the Hospital Wing.

“Alright.” Penny moaned, biting her bottom lip. With one last worried glance she took a delicate bite out the side of my waffle and then sat down so she could watch his face.

That girl is going to be grey by the time she is twenty if she doesn’t stop worrying.

She should be more like me and just not give a rat’s ass. Everything is so much easier.


“I have a fabulous idea!” Dom cried, and Penny winced at the same time I slammed my head into my pillow to try and block out her voice.

Yeah, it didn’t work.

“What’s your fabulous idea?” I deadpanned, and Dom bounced to the end of my bed and sat down like some kind of chipmunk on drugs. Maybe she’s drunk. Or maybe she got in the way of Fred trying to practise his Charms again.

“Let’s have a girl’s night tonight. We can wear our pyjamas and I’ll sneak down at get popcorn and we’ll just have girl’s night in.” Merlin on a motorbike, it’s been about two years since we last had a girly sleepover.

“I can’t Dom; I promised Kane I’d go round to the Slytherin Common Room tonight to help him with his homework. He’ll get ang – upset if I don’t show up.” Dom opened her mouth as though she was going to say something – most likely something that involved a good few swear words – but she closed her mouth again and nodded stiffly.

“What about you Summer? Should we have a girly sleepover, just the pair of us?” Dom blinked at me, Bambi-style.

What would be the correct answer to this question?

Well, not the truth, that’s for sure. ‘Sorry Dom, I can’t spend the evening painting my nails and wearing face masks with my best friend because I already have plans to go and snog your cousin.’

Oh yeah, that will go down a storm.

“Sorry Dom, James is helping me with my homework, so I’ve got to... go round to the lad’s dorm...” Dom cocked an eyebrow at me.

“You’re going to do homework with James in the boy’s dormitories?” She asked disbelievingly. “Wouldn’t it make more sense to go to the Library?”

Yeah, not allowed to go there. Turns out Pincy was being serious when she said we were banned. I tried to walk in there the other day and she physically chased me out, waving a textbook above her head. I was sure she was going to die, because surely it can’t be healthy for a woman that age to run that fast.

I asked James, and he said he tried to go in the other day with Connor and Fred – I didn’t even know Fred knew where the Library was up until this point – and she grabbed him by the earlug and dragged him out.

I think she has issues.

Maybe she thinks books are gods or something, like she goes back to her room and gets down on her knees and prays to the great Encyclopaedia in the sky.

Tee-hee. Amusing mental image. I’ll share that with James later.

“Um... I need the loo.” I darted away from Dom’s curious stare and slammed the door of the bathroom shut behind me. I’m not cut out for this kind of thing.

I would be the world’s worst ninja.

This is a shame, because it would be awesome to be a ninja. You could wear one of those cool masks and swing around on ropes like there was no tomorrow. Pretty amazing way to live, don’t you think?

I think I need a serious life re-evaluation. You know you’ve hit rock bottom when you’ve locked yourself in a bathroom to have conversations with yourself about ninjas.

“Oi, Summer.” Dom hammered on the door, showing her usual levels of femininity and grace – did all the Veela-personality genes go to Victoire or something? “I need to pee, so hurry and go study with James.”

I grinned at myself in the mirror – I go back to what I said about me needing a life re-evaluation – and pulled open the door.

I grabbed my school bag from next to the door and called goodbye to the dorm at large.

“See you in a bit.” Dom called through the bathroom door. “Oh, and do us a favour.”

There was a very loud flushing noise, a pause, and then Dom walked back into the dorm. “While you’re there, ask James what’s going on with him and Erin for me.”
I turned around so fast I was almost positive I’d snapped my neck.

“Who’s Erin?”

“Oh, some girl in Ravenclaw. Erin Jameson, I think.” My head was filled with an image of a pretty blonde girl with very blue eyes. “Fred convinced James to ask her to Hogsmeade next weekend, so he’s taking her. I don’t know if he fancies her or something, so do me a favour and ask him while you’re there?” Dom grinned at me, and I forced my face into a wooden smile.

James is going to Hogsmeade with some fancy-arse Ravenclaw girl?

And he didn’t bother mentioning it to me. I mean, it’s not like he has to mention it to me, but James, Connor and I normally go to Hogsmeade together, because Dom is normally off with whatever twat she’s dating, Penny is forced – ahem, chooses to go with Kane and Fred is off with whatever chick he wants to snog against a tree.

It never occurred to me that James might take someone else with him. Well, he can, that’s his choice after all.

This is going to be a very awkward snog.


disclaimer: none of this is mine. how depressing.

 A/N: so... first time we ever saw kane. what do you think? live up to your expectations or not?

what about james and erin and their sooper-special-hogsmeade-date? anyone have any predictions as to what is going on there? 

kisses, ellie ♥♥

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