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Kaleidoscope, they called it.



 

 


Kaleidoscope: A continually changing pattern of shapes and colors.



 

 

And finally, she understood.



 

 

Love is kaleidoscope. She knew it the moment He looked into her eyes.



 

 

It was white. It hit her. Hard, and fast, and bright. At first, at least. And she knew..simply knew that she must have it.



 

 

And then, it was red. It burned. Left an ache in her chest every moment of every day that he was not hers. And so she planned and planned, until finally she thought what to do.



 

 

It would be simple, really. She would only have to catch Him while He was alone. It didn't happen very often, and so she would wait.



 

 

And so, it began. He was hers. Finally, after so long, He was hers.



 

 

And then, it was pale. Not any less; just pale. Pastel. Beautiful, and pure, and pale. She knew He was hers, and that He would always be hers.



 

 

But then, it was darker. She was tricking Him. She knew, in the very recesses of her soul, that it wasn't right. What if He didn't really love her? Could she stand it if He didn't? Was it so wrong to love someone so much, so very  much, that you'd forced them to love you back? But maybe...maybe He did. But would He ever forgive her for lying to Him? She couldn't risk it. She just couldn't.



 

 

But she had to. She was her father's daughter, yes...but that, by any means, did not mean that she was anything like him. She could never ever force her sole purpose in life to stay, unwillingly by her side. Especially now. And He was her only reason to survive. He was her everything. He was her life.



 

 

But she had another reason now. A son, growing within her. And the son was His, too. Surely that would be enough to make Him stay? It had to be. But she couldn't risk it. Couldn't.



 

 

But she had to. Because she loved Him. That, and their son, had to be enough, didn't it?



 

 

And so she stopped.



 

 

Stopped feeding Him with false love for her.



 

 

And she could see the change, growing gradually in Him.
And then, it was gold. Bold, and bright, and new, because it was true.



 



 

 

He loved her. It was miraculous, but He did! He stayed by her, took care of her, loved her. And the light in his eyes when He looked at her was enough to let her know she'd done the right thing.



 

 

But then, it was gray. Lonely, and sad, and afraid. Because she had a secret that she knew He would not like, no matter how much He really did love her.



 

 

Because the child that grew within her was strong. And not just strong in the sense that his father, her love, was. No, he was strong in the sense that only powerful, magical beings were. And it was, at that point, that she finally acknowledged the blood that ran through her veins. The same blood that ran through her child's veins.



 

 

It was old blood. Powerful blood. Pure blood.



 

 

It's atrocities had lain dormant within her, because although it was powerful, it was marred by her 'weak heart' as her father had called it.



 

 

Because she had loved, and could love. And her heart was not weak, but strong because of it.



 

 

She feared him. She feared her unborn son. But she loved him too. How could she not? And she was confused, and didn't know what to do.



 

 

And her love, her everything, her life...He knew. And He feared their son, too. But He did not know him, so He did not love him as she did. He loved only her. And it wasn't enough.



 

 

And He left.



 

 

And so, the kaleidoscope changed again.



 

 

And then, it was black.



 

 

And without His love to make her strong, she could not love her son. She only feared him. Her son was no longer her's. He was the child of her blood. The child of Power, because his heart was not strong as hers was. His heart could not overthrow the thirst - the need - of their blood as she had. He could not love, as she did. And then he was born.



 

 

And she did not belong on this Earth anymore. Could not belong - could not stay strong for the son of her blood - without her reason to survive. And so, she let go.



 

 

And then, it was Nothing. Everywhere was Nothing.



 

 

Everywhere, and everything. And she knew Nothing. But she waited. She had to wait. There was nothing but waiting for her to do.



 

 

She was empty, and alone, and confused. And she did not know how long she waited. Seconds? Minutes? Hours? Days? Months? Years? Did time even exist in this vast expanse of Nothing? She did not know. She knew nothing, like the Nothing that surrounded her.



 

 

And then it was white again. She knew white.



 

 

White was hard, and fast, and bright.



 

 

And then it was red. And she knew that, too.



 

 

And then it was pastel. And then dark. Then gold. Gray. Black. And she wasn't Nothing anymore, and she remembered.



 

 

And then it was Him. Her love, her life, her everything. Her reason to survive. And He was everywhere and nowhere all at once, and she was dizzy.



 

 

But He caught her. He'd always caught her. And behind Him was His family. His mother. His father.



 

 

But then they were gone. And the son that was never theirs was nowhere to be seen.



 

 

It was her, and Him. Like she'd always wanted. Like He'd always wanted.



 

 

And then it was Gold. And she was afraid that the other colors would come again, and He would leave, so she closed her eyes. If she could not see it, it would not happen.



 

 

But He stayed. And He touched her eyelids softly, tenderly, with His gentle fingertips. Silently pleading with her to open them. And she could feel Him laughing, breathing, existing. And so, she looked into His eyes once more.



 

 

And finally, after everything going so wrong for so long...everything was right. And He smiled. He held her, kissed her, loved her.



 

 


Kaleidoscope, they called it.



Kaleidoscope: A continually changing pattern of shapes and colors.



And finally, she understood.



Love is kaleidoscope. She'd known it the moment He'd looked into her eyes.



And she knew it again, now.



 



--------------------



 



So. I don't really know if that made a lot of sense. It's reeeaaalllyy late, and for some reason, I only ever feel like writing anything when I'm half asleep. And I think I've developed an unhealthy obsession with commas and italics. Haha.



A couple things to know: Yes, all the He's and Him's are capitalized on purpose, because I think Merope probably worshipped Tom a little bit. And all the Nothing's are capitalized because the Nothingness is kind of like a waiting room for whatever happens after you die. Limbo, I guess. And Merope couldn't move onto her Gold (Heaven) until she was with Tom, so she had to wait for him. Or, Him, I guess I should say. Lol.



And, yes, I do believe Tom had to have grown to love her, but was just too scared to stay.



So, yeah. That's it. Lemme know what you think :)



-Jess



 

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