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Chapter Eleven:



  Prongs- I'm on my way--Padds


“HELLO? SIRIUS? SOLENE?” Charlotte’s voice cut through the wood and the locked door rattled as someone shook the doorknob.

“Who’s in there?” Nate joined in.

“She was with us just a second ago,” Audrey added, and there was a knock on the door once again.

Solene and Sirius were frozen. They remained totally quiet, Sirius’ hands still on Solene’s waist, hers around his neck, the full lengths of their bodies connected and their breathing unsteady. Sirius didn’t know what to do. He scanned the room for an exit, and found no way out.

“I know someone is in there! I’ll just go find a key then,” Charlotte threatened.

“She’s bluffing,” Solene whispered uncertainly and looked up at Sirius, but his eyes were shut forcefully. He had really been fooling himself in thinking he would be able to kiss Solene and pull away. In a matter of seconds, he had backed her against the wall and stripped her. He was instantly more aware of their nudity, aware of their bodies slick with sweat and stuck together, and aware that they had told everyone they were cousins.

If Charlotte hadn’t knocked I’d be fucking Solene against this wall right now. Am I this shallow? Am I insane? Sirius’ thoughts were spinning out of his control. There is no way this wont come bite me in the ass. What if Regulus finds out? Or what if he doesn’t find out, and I just have to live knowing I almost screwed his wife. Does he deserve it? Can Solene live with this? Is she mad? How the fuck do we get out of here? Can I apparate?


“Yeah, I’m in here,” Solene answered finally, and pulled away from Sirius, their skin seeming to peel apart as they separated in the heat. She picked her clothes up from the floor and began to put on her shorts unhurriedly. She looked over to Sirius, dumbstruck and motionless.

“Are you going to get dressed?” she asked calmly and raised her eyebrows.

“And Sirius?” Nate answered.

“Yeah,” Sirius grunted in response, wondering if Solene had a plan.

“What are you doing? Can you open the door?” Charlotte asked.

“Yep. Hold on a second,” Solene replied and pulled her shirt over her head, brushed her hair back with her fingers and waited for Sirius to finish dressing before she pulled the door open.


The puzzled and concerned faces of many of their friends greeted them. Charlotte, Nate, Audrey, Elias, Claire, and Gilles were cramped into the narrow hallway.

“Is everything alright?” said Nate.

“Yes,” Solene answered and turned to Sirius. He nodded and ran his fingers through his hair nervously.

“We thought you two were fighting again. Maybe one of you had finally killed the other,” Gilles joked and Sirius faked a smile.

“Plausible,” Solene said calmly and smirked.

“So what’s going on?” Charlotte’s arms crossed around her chest, “I don’t want any fighting during my farewell party!”

“Sirius just needed to get something off his chest,” Solene chuckled amused and Sirius chuckled nervously.

“What is it with you two anyway?” Nate questioned, “You’re family. Can’t you just lay off each other?”


“Let’s see. Sirius, can you just lay off me? I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve your manhandling,” Solene bit her lip innocently but Sirius was not amused.

He did not find the situation funny in the slightest. Something about how right it felt, felt wrong. Having Solene beneath him made him feel as if he was on fire. Her body against his erased every other reality in his world. It was as if he would do anything to make sure it was always his mouth against her skin, always his hands gripping her thighs, and only his name on her lips. He could have few thoughts more dangerous.

“I need some air,” Sirius struggled with his words and pushed past his friends, through the crowd and down the porch steps, well aware that Solene was tailing behind him.

“Where are you going?” she asked.

“For a walk or something.”


“Can I come?” she replied.

Sirius turned to face her standing on the steps. The light from inside shown against her body and he could see her lips were red and plump from their kissing.


“Why not?” she smiled. Is she really so unfazed, Sirius wondered.

“I need to think.”

“Just go along with it. Stop thinking.”

“I just did that and I think it's cost me my sanity.”

Solene approached and led him further away from the crowd. The sand was cool against his bare feet and the wind was refreshing. It made Solene’s hair dance in front of her eyes and Sirius’ hand twitched as he resisted tucking the strands behind her ear.

“We’re just having fun,” she assured him, trying to excuse their actions.

“That’s not all it is anymore, Solene,” he groaned.


“What are you talking about?”

“You think that was just fun? How far would it have gone if Charlotte hadn’t knocked? Is that really so meaningless to you?”

“You have no problem locking yourself in rooms with the other girls,” Solene remarked, her voice tainted with hurt. The feeling of rejection was alien.

“You know you’re different. Can’t you see what is happening?”


She looked up at him and had trouble finding the words. She didn’t understand what he meant.

“What do you want from me then, Sirius?” she asked softly, scrunching her brow.


“To stop pretending! I see you Solene, you aren’t like your family, you’re like me.”


Solene shook her head immediately. She could not have another one of these conversations. Sirius just had to let it go. She did not know what she wanted or who she was, and was tired of Sirius trying to tell her. He moved forward towards her and took her hands in his own.


“Sure you are. You don’t believe in what you say you do. Stand up for yourself Solene. Stand up for what you believe in.”


“I can’t,” she whispered.

“What are you afraid of? Change? Trouble? Because we can’t stay like this. I won’t renounce everything I believe in for you,” Sirius said flatly.

“Well I won’t ruin my life for you!” Solene retaliated.

“I’m not asking you to ruin your life,” Sirius said aggravated, “I’m asking you to stop being … dead. You’re dead, Solene. You’re just their puppet, a pretty worthless face to toy with.”

“I’m not,” she said and tried to inch away but Sirius kept his fingers entwined with her own.

“Not to me. But you are to your family, to Regulus, to your pureblood-obsessed friends,” his voice was pained.

“That’s not true. My family loves me,” Solene countered and then added cruelly, “you wouldn’t understand.”

He sighed helplessly and looked away. Solene could still feel him clinging to her hands.


“Do you want me dead? Do you want your friends in that house dead?” Sirius tried to reason with her again.

“Of course not.”


“They’d kill us, Solene. My own brother wouldn’t think twice.”

“Stop being so overdramatic,” she rolled her eyes.


He laughed disbelievingly and released her fingers, running his hands up to her shoulders and bringing her closer to him.

“Open your eyes, Solene!” he begged.

“I can’t!” her voice cracked, “My family would never forgive me. I’d be…” she stopped herself but it was too late, Sirius knew what she was going to say.

“You can say it. You’d be an outcast. And a blood traitor. You’d be filth.”

Solene remembered her parents’ tone when they spoke of traitors and muggle-lovers. It was the lowest insult, and one far too sharp for her to swallow. Sirius’ eyes were shining in the moonlight and he held her firmly. She remembered the first time he had held her that way, what had started it all. They had come full circle, and suddenly she felt as if nothing had changed.

“How could you ask me to willingly become that?” she asked in disbelief.

“You’re a coward,” he said in astonishment, shaking his head in disappointment, “you are a spoiled, selfish brat. Would you just look around you? You love those people in there, muggles or not. Who cares what your family says, Solene? They are insane fanatics who don’t understand what it is like to love anyone— so they could never love you. They all abandoned you this summer! Not one person came to see you. Drop your ridiculous pride and do what you know is right!” he yelled. “I’d bear the burden with you.”


Sirius brought her closer, but knew it was too late. He recognized the look: Solene’s eyes glazed over with an icy glare of contempt and pomposity and the warmth that had been stirring beneath them all summer was suddenly lost with a blink of her eyes. Her lashes suddenly shadowed, not complemented her face and her soft, pale lips were pulling into a haughty scowl. He had lost her.

“I would never take on your mistakes.”

He was so frustrated he had to hold back from throwing her away from him. He didn’t wish to hurt her; he was just desperate to wake her up. He looked away from her delicate face and out to the ocean, her tense but unmoving body still against his own. She was driving him crazy. What more could he do? Sirius released her and stepped away. Solene averted her eyes, already regretting her words. She had never seen Sirius so disappointed. His jaw was clenched and he couldn’t even look at her. Solene suddenly felt very cold and moved farther away from him. Every particle of her body was aching to be near him, but she could not continue any longer. She had to leave. Without another word Solene turned back to the chateau.

Sirius walked down the shore alone, desperately trying to clear his head. The water lapped against his feet and he dug his toes into the sand. He had really thought he had been able to change her, to rouse her, to get her to remember. Perhaps Solene Rosier was a lost cause and he had wasted a full summer on an unachievable feat; perhaps there was no sense in trying to change the tides.



Solene opened the kitchen entrance to the chateau, her body still raking with sobs, when Minny appeared with a crack in front of her.


“Mistress, Master Regulus is back,” she squeaked, “And he has company.”

“Who?” Solene asked bewildered.

“Master Avery, Master Wilkes and Master Malfoy,” Minny answered nervously, her eyes darting back and forth with her shaken nerves, “I brought you some robes.”

Solene felt her heart race in panic; she was far too drunk to deal with this. She took the robes from the house elf hastily, discarded her muggle shorts in the trash and threw the fabric over her head, patting down her hair and rinsing her mouth of the taste of alcohol and Sirius. Her heart immediately pulled when she thought of him.

“Did they ask about me?” Solene questioned.

“Minny told them you were sleeping, Mistress Rosier. They told me to fetch you and Minny told them you were going to take a bath.”

“Fetch me some perfume, make-up, soap—anything to make me presentable,” Solene snapped and tried to catch her breath. This was too close of a call.

 Over half an hour later, when she finally felt composed enough, Solene made her way into the den slowly. Avery, Wilkes and Regulus were seated at the round table, drinking scotch. Malfoy was pacing beside the window. The room was dimly lit with two candles and outside the window it was still dark. The sea looked like an immense, black void.

“Finally,” Regulus said upon her entrance, but he smiled genuinely and looked happy to see her.

“Good evening everyone,” Solene said, making an effort to lace her voice with the arrogance and seduction it had all but lost.


“Solene, dear,” Malfoy approached her and kissed her flushed cheek softly. “You didn’t have to trouble yourself getting so dolled up for us.”

“No trouble at all,” Solene smiled vainly and seated herself beside Regulus. Her boyfriend slipped his hand over hers and kissed her lips softly, breathing in her scent.

“Anything I can do for you gentlemen?”

Malfoy smiled, “We were awfully rude to wake you. You see we have been set up here for a few days with some errands, and I just wanted to let you know as soon as I could that your dear Narcissa and I are engaged to be married. I thought the news would please you.”


“That’s wonderful,” Solene plastered her face with a grin and approached him again, kissing both his cheeks in congratulations. His skin was cold and she felt the hairs on her arms rise in fear that he would be able to sense Sirius on her skin.

“And we were just discussing,” he continued, “when it would be Regulus’ turn to have the same honor with you.”

Avery and Wilkes nodded in agreement, their eyes running up and down her body hungrily, almost salivating. Solene chuckled softly and returned to Regulus’ side. She felt more secure by him.

“Well, I suppose that would be up to Regulus,” she oozed. Somehow she felt responding with any less enthusiasm would be unwise.

“How quaint. Regulus said it was to be your decision,” Malfoy seemed to be thoroughly enjoying playing matchmaker and Solene was secretly relieved that Regulus still valued her opinion in the matter. She looked up at her boyfriend gratefully, and he ran his hand across her cheek. She couldn’t help but relax at his tenderness. There was something that prevented her from believing Regulus could be evil.

The men chatted for another hour of things with little consequence. They were drunk and Solene was sleepy. She rested her head against Regulus’ shoulder, her comfort from him returning out of habit.


“I can understand all too well the loverbirds’ need for quality time, can’t you boys,” Malfoy laughed loudly and threw back the rest of his drink, “Come now, Regulus. You retire for the night, we can get the servants to set us up in some rooms.”

Regulus seemed relieved and he rose from his chair, firmly grasping Solene’s hand and bidding goodnight to his company. He excused himself to speak to the house elf quickly about where to set up his guests and then returned to Solene, leading her to his bedroom.

The moment he shut the door behind them, Regulus pulled Solene up against his body.

“How I’ve missed you,” he groaned in an odd combination of ecstasy and agony. Solene was caught off guard once again by the new passionate Regulus.

“Take off your clothes,” he demanded and leaned his back against the door.

Solene stood petrified. There was no way she could handle this: making love to Regulus just after grinding her naked body against his brother’s. And yet, she felt as if she did not have a choice.

“Now,” he stressed and moved towards her, untying her robes and kissing down the center of her chest.

“Regulus,” she whispered, her breath shaking, “I don’t think I can do this right now.”

“I know, I know,” he kissed along her jaw and tangled his hands into her hair, “You’re upset with me I know. You have the right to be. But I love you and I need to feel you Solene.”

“Regulus I—”

And his lips met hers forcefully as he pulled the cloth off her shoulders and circled his hands around her neck.

“Please, please, baby,” he whispered, “You don’t know how I need you. I need you to do this for me.”

Solene swallowed and felt her body begin to shake. She was overwhelmed, she was drowning, she was lost. She didn’t know what to do. Regulus pulled his own robes off his body quickly and backed the two of them against the wall beside the fireplace. His hands held her face tenderly and he kissed her again and again, her lips and her eyelids and her collarbones. Solene felt her blood begin to rush and the alcohol resurged through her system. Regulus always knew how to make her feel good, she could lose herself in him, she could find a release in him.

She grazed her teeth against his mouth and pulled his hips closer, her hands pushing ardently up his chest. Suddenly, she hungered for this: contact. Solene licked the boys lips again, they were warm and swollen. How red Sirius lips had been when they pulled away from their kiss. How soft his skin was, his lips were, his tongue had felt slipping into her mouth. Sirius had tasted like tequila and lemons. How she loved the sensation of squirming after sucking on lemons. Had he tasted like that for her, had Sirius’ lips been so sweet and soft just for her?

And his skin so smooth, his eyelashes so thick against her cheek. She ran her hands across her boyfriends shoulders, reliving the tangled moment when Sirius had backed her against he wall and she had felt how broad he was, how overpowering he was. How she had clung to him; both an anchor and the undeniable start of all her chaos. She ran her fingers up his neck and into his hair- how thick and silky and black his hair had been tangled in her fingers. He had been so forceful and passionate. Murky, dark, black. This kiss was forceful and passionate the same, this kiss could absolutely convince her she was against that orange wall again, absolutely lost in what she knew she was forbidden to do again. Hands ran up her stomach and traveled to her breasts. How rough his hands had felt against her curves.

“Mmm Sirius,” she murmured, her breath hitched and she sunk deeper into the body. It wasn’t until the lips softened and suddenly pulled away sharply that she realized what a terrifying mistake she had just made.

“What?” Regulus asked, his eyes narrowed in repulsion.

‘I…” Solene fumbled with her words. How could she have been so stupid? “I …don’t know where that came from.”

He gripped his fingers hard against her jaw and pushed Solene further into the wall.

“Don’t lie to me!”

She averted her eyes from his menacing glare, heavy and insane with rage.

“Tell me!” he nearly bellowed.

She steadied herself, “You were gone all summer,” she stated coldly.

“So you fucked my brother!” he cried.

“No,” she replied calmly, “I didn’t. But I was lonely so I spent time with him.”

“So you wanted to! You dreamt of being an addition to the list of blood-traitors and whores!”

“Regulus, calm down,” she pleaded, “I wanted nothing like that from him,” she lied.

“Solene you said his name. You moaned it for God’s sake!”

“It was a mistake. It didn’t mean that.”

“What else can that mean?” he sneered.

Solene was silent. What else could it mean? Regulus laughed bitterly and clenched his fingers around her face harder, his lips brushing hers roughly as he spoke.

“Stupid Rosier has the hots for a muggle-lover. Let me explain something to you: I know my brother. And you mean nothing to him,” he spat “You don’t go to school with him, you don’t know what he is like. Between the legs of ever girl he decides to conquer. Never one to discriminate, dear Sirius—muggles to Slytherins, he ruins them all. You should see the girls after he jilts them, the way he breaks their stupid hearts. You’re just another tally, Solene. Another idiot bitch he’s managed to taint. Except you come with an even bigger prize.

Solene shut her eyes forcefully, trying to block out the sound.

“You think he gave two shits about you? He was just trying to find a way to ruin me.”

Solene began to tremble. He was going to leave bruises on her face. He was almost smothering her.

“You were everything to me—“ Regulus started.

“No,” Solene found her voice, it was meek, but it was there, “No. I was nothing to you but a trophy Regulus. You left me here to spend months alone, you knew Cissy wouldn’t come.”

“I have other obligations!”

“Like what? What have you been doing?”

“Proving my loyalties.”

“Which loyalties? To whom? What would you do if Voldemort commanded you to kill me—”

Suddenly, Solene’s head smashed against the wall as Regulus clamped down on her shoulders and shook her, “How dare you speak the Dark Lord’s name!”

Solene’s skin fell chalk pale. Was this what her boyfriend had become?

“Regulus,” she whispered and he released her, backing away in shock and fear and shame. He had never laid a finger on her before, how could he now feel as if he could crush her without hesitation. She stepped forward following him, suddenly unafraid, she knew what she had to do. Slowly, she touched her fingers to his wrist. Regulus didn’t move away, but he turned his head down to avert her gaze. Gently, Solene placed his arm in her hand and focused in the dark. Her heart fell as her eyes came across the image of a serpent and a skull etched into the pale skin of they young boy’s forearm. She didn’t comment, didn’t even gasp as she released him bluntly and moved away. She moved away from Regulus, away from his room, away from the dark.


“You wont find him,” Regulus muttered bitterly to Solene’s shadow and she stopped around the corner of the doorframe to hear him finish, “He’s left you.”

Solene shook her head, refusing to believe it; after all, how would Regulus know? She rushed determinedly down the halls, reciting in her head what she’d say. Sure for the first time that this was what she wanted. Sure that a premature and empty marriage to Regulus would be the death of her and that she would rather her reputation rot then spend another minute in the shadows of a husband’s growing wickedness. She hurdled herself down the stairs, along the way breaking into a run, and her breath caught as she turned down the hall, fumbled Sirius’ doorknob without knocking and barged into his room.

It was empty. His school trunks were gone, his clothes were gone, and he was gone.

Regulus was right: Sirius had left her. Again.

A/N: Please don't throw things at me! I'm doomed to be slow but no one is perfect! :/ Anyway, the rest of this story is all mapped out and partially written so I will never abandon it!! As of now, looks like 4 chapters left. I would really appreciate a review hehe to know there are some people out there still reading. Thanks so much for sticking with me! 


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