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A/N; Hey Y’all. I cannot even begin to say how sorry I am for leaving this almost a year. I have only recently got back into this site and was reading some and getting really frustrated that people had just left stories for ages then I realised that is what I did. But I am on summer holidays now, so I will see what I can do.

Right, I am going to go through and edit the previous chapters because I don’t like them at all. The characters are not right, and it all happens to fast, so I will let you know when I have edited.

Lily stiffened at Claire’s words but forced herself to keep walking. She knew that walking away from Claire would probably be the stupidest thing she had done in a long time. Who knew what kind of information she would feed James to manipulate him to be hers. It was common knowledge that Claire was the one who sought after James the most, and there was some bad blood between her and Lily because of the whole thing.

But it was too hard to stay. To see Claire act around her boyfri- ex boyfriend like that. She had no worries that Claire would tell James that Lily and James dated. She would not want to ruin her own chances like that. But if she could torture Lily in the process there was no doubt that she would.

Lily quickened her pace to find someone, anyone to talk to, to take her mind of what was happening in the great hall behind her. She hurried up the stairs and into the deserted corridors. Now that her lessons had been relinquished she felt a sense of nothingness.

There was no James to keep her occupied when the homework ran dry, or when she just wanted a hug. She could do the catch up work she was inevitably going to have to do when they returned to class, but she just didn’t have it in her.

Her future had seemed so clear with James by her side. They would marry. Buy a small house. Have children.

But now all that seemed like wishful thinking. It was silly really. James had only been in the coma for 2 weeks, and been awake for about 2 days. But 2 weeks and 2 days were all it took for Lily to doubt everything they have and believe it not true.

Surely their love was stronger than that? It could survive anything. Look what they had already been through. Lily’s parents being murdered just before they had got together. A death eater attack on them at Christmas, with them barely escaping with their lives.

They had pulled through, with the occasional rough patch. But still, here they were.

Lily’s feet had somehow managed to take her straight to the Heads dorm without her realizing. She uttered the password and clambered in not expecting anyone to be there. Least of all Sirius.

He looked up at her entering, “Lily, are you alright? You look like you’ve been slapped in the face” He said in a voice that was unusually kind for Sirius.

Lily nodded dolefully. “Ho- How did you get here? I left you with James and C- her.” Lily questioned with some confusion. Then the thought hit her, “You left James alone with her?” Panic set in as she looked back at the portrait hole contemplating whether to run back there and just say she had forgotten something that James had. Anything to get him away from her.

“No! No, I would never do that to you.” Sirius leapt up from his place on the sofa and went over to Lily obviously sensing she was in a bit of a fluster. He lead her back to the sofa and with difficulty forced her to sit. “Dumbledore came to collect James just after you left, and I couldn’t bare being in that Claire What’s-her-face’s presence any longer, so I hopped on back here for some peace and quiet.

“But, how did you get here before me?” She asked.

“Well, when you are a Marauder you can do pretty much anything!” Sirius joked lightly. Lily couldn’t help but a small smile at that; it was terrible true. “There’s the Lily we know and love!” Sirius commented as she smiled. “I knew she was in there somewhere!”

Lily looked at him sadly; “It’s been a rough few weeks…I guess I’ve just sort of lost myself a little.” She looked down at her hand, not wanting to meet Sirius’ piercing glare much longer.

“Look, Lily,” Sirius shuffled closer to her and put an arm round her, “I know I’m not one for giving advice and it is usually dangerous to take any advice at all from me, but trust me here things will get better, but you can’t let it get to you.”

“It’s just so hard, seeing him every day. Knowing that every touch, every kiss meant nothing” She whispered in a hurt voice.

“Meant nothing? Of course it did! It meant the world! Lily Evans actually dated James Potter. It gave the world hope that there is no lost cause, that there is no mountain high!” he exclaimed jumping from his seat. “If James Potter can get Lily Evans to date him, for six months no less! Then anything is possible. Even getting James memory back.” Lily looked up to him.

“You really think so?” She asked stupidly.

“Yes I do. But he can't fall in the love with you again, if you aren’t the same girl. He fell in love with the feisty Lily that stood for no crap and would never give up. He needs you just as much as you need him.” The Sirius added in the most since voice he owned “Trust me"

Lily felt a surge of hope rush through her. “Okay. But…I’m going to need your help okay?”

Sirius nodded knowing he would just about go to the ends of the earth to get his best mate back. 

Lily and Sirius were right underway with her specific job when Remus walked into James room about half an hour later with a box under his arms.

“What has happened in here? I thought we wanted James to get his memory back. Not prevent him from remembering!” He exclaimed at the sight of the room. Lily knew he must have seen the abundance of missing photos that had once cluttered James walls. Lily turned to face him ready to explain… if she could. But Sirius cut in.

“Remus old pal,” Sirius greeted as he turned around ignoring Remus exclamation, “What’s that you got under your arm there? Food for me I hope!” He winked.

“No no… photos…" Remus said absentmindedly. Lily could see the cogs working in his brain, trying to figure out why only some of the photos had come down. And as if she could see into his mind, it clicked. He turned to face her, “Only the ones of you two together?” He asked casually.

She nodded. Remus looked around again, “You don’t want him to know…” She shook her head. No, she didnt want him to know about their relationship together.

“It’s better that way. We don’t want to force too much on him. We need to take our time” Sirius said. Remus said nothing, just nodded. Lily was painfully reminded of her conversation with Madame Brown the night before James left the hospital wing.

She had yet to tell anyone what had been said, and was planning on keeping it that way. “I want him to remember on his own. He has enough to deal with without me pushing our relationship on him. It would feel… wrong.”

“There’s nothing I can say to change your mind?” Remus asked, knowing her response already.

“Not a word. I am sticking by this Remus. We need James back. And if we do it. We are doing it the right way!” She said a spark of her old self slipping into the speech.

“That’s our Lily…” Remus murmured as he set off helping them sort through the boxes dedicated to Lily that lie dormant in James closet.

Lily couldn’t help but smile at the comment. Maybe Sirius was right. She could still be herself. All wasn’t lost. 

The clear out of James room was a tiring and slow process. There were so many things dedicated to Lily that James had cumulated over the years it was a nightmare having to sort through it all.

As she was sorting through one particular box of notes they had written to each other before they had dated Lily was overwhelmed by a sense of love and dedicated that James had shown her despite the way she used to treat him. He was always there for her no matter what, and it wasn’t until now she could truly appreciate that.

The boxed all the photos and love letters up ready for when James was ready to see them. Lily could not bear to part with then and she was sure that James was flip if he found them missing when … if … his memory came back.

“And that… is the last of it!” Sirius sighed with great satisfaction as he pulled out the last box entitled; “LILY- NOTES FROM SUMMER”. “Who knew James was so creepy about keeping all that stuff? If I were you I’d be scared Lily!” As he looked at the boxes in the corner filled with things Lily related. Lily just laughed lightly.

There was a large shoe box filled with countless photos and drawings of Lily. Most of which were taken without her consent. There was the box that Sirius had pulled out containing the letters from summer, and two similar with Christmas letters and hate letters. Along with those where several framed photos of Lily and James.

Whilst Lily and Sirius had been clearing out all the photos and things Remus had been redecorating the room with photos he had found of the four boys together, along with a couple photo albums he had lying around as a device to trigger James memory through sight.

His job had only taken a few minutes, so when he had finished he was sent down for guard duty to make sure James didn’t come up and see what was going on. It would be far to complicated to explain.

“I better get this stuff to my room then. James never goes in there anymore anyway so it won’t be found by unwanted eyes.” She commented quietly. Sirius nodded settling down on James bed. “Are you going to go down to find James? Maybe he is with Remus.”

A funny look came over Sirius’ face when she mentioned James, “No, no. I’m fine here. Rather tired actually. I didn’t sleep well last night. Lily frowned. That was unlike Sirius. When James was in the hospital wing he hadn’t left his side, now here he was not wanting to spend time with him. She just shrugged it off, se had too much to deal with at the moment.

She levitated the boxes behind her and made her way down stairs leaving Sirius behind. Evidently Remus had been successful in capturing James before he came to his room and the two were engaged in conversation with Remus dropping in prompts here and there.

Lily hesitated at the bottom of the stairs seeing James' frustration. It tore her apart inside that she could do nothing to help. And she knew in the long run she was adding to the pain if he ever found out that she had kept this from her. But for the time being, it was preventing the hurt, maybe not for her, but defiantly for him.

James sensing a presence behind him looked over his shoulder, “Hey, Evan, whatchya got there?” He asked noticing the boxes.

“Nothing you need to worry about James, I assure you.” She looked over at Remus, “Any luck?” Remus just shook his head, and James dipped his head in sadness at having made no progress.

“No matter” Lily said with false sincerity and happiness, “It will come back. I know it will. James Potter never let anything beat him before now!” She laughed. Remus contributed a small laugh, but James just looked confused.

“But I’m not that James anymore am I? Whoever he is was gone and I can’t seem to get him back”

Lily stopped laughing and looked James in the eyes. “We will keep trying. Its only day 2.” And with that she carried on her journey up to her room.

As in line with Lily’s personality her room was spot less as ever. She levitated the boxes neatly into a corner. She would deal with those later. She had no energy in her at the moment to be sorting them out. 

A vase of forget me nots sat on her bedside table, made to last forever by a charm. James had give them to her on their first date. How ironic it seemed now.

She hoped that Alice and Marlene had made their way to the library after Breakfast too look up more on James condition. She decided to go down and help them. It was the least she could do really.

Any sliver of hope was worth taking a look at. She would find out what was wrong with him and how to fix it. No matter what.

"Lets try again" Remus said as Lily went up to her room.

“Remus, I don’t know why we are bothering! We have done this so many times! I tried it last night with Lily, and now with you. The verbal prompting is obviously not working is it!” James burst out after failing to remember another aspect of his life. He was getting sick of it already and it was only the second day.

“I know I know” Remus said calmly, “Its just that if you remember magic, you must remember other things connect to magic right?”

James nodded stiffly. He saw the logic, but everything was related to magic yet he remembered none of it.

“So, if we can try and get you to think about specific magic that has a link then maybe you will remember why you used that magic you see?” Remus continued. “Like how can you remember so much about transfiguration and still be fooled into believing that Professor McGonagall was your mother? There’s a connection lose and all we need to do is find it and put it back!”

“You make it sound so simple. But it’s not some sort of toy you are playing with Remus! It’s my mind. It’s not something that’s easily fixed. If it goes wrong then that’s it! I’m done for!” James jumped up from his seat seething with anger. Why was Remus taking this so lightly? This could go so easily wrong.

“Erm… James, is everything alright?” Came a tentative voice from behind James. He turned around to see Lily stood looking onto the scene confused. James shook his head and shot a look at Remus.

“It’s fine.”

Lily servayed the scene for a moment, and decided she wasnt needed so just nodded and left through the portrait hole.

It was silent for a few moments and James words hung heavily in the air. He flopped down onto the sofa again.

“I’m sorry” Remus said finally in a small voice. “I know it’s not easy for you, and it must be frustrating. But it’s not easy for us either. It is difficult and frustrating too to see you like this, so helpless.”

James was suddenly washed with guilt. He hadn’t even thought about what his condition would be doing to these people. And they obviously cared about him. They had been at his beck and call from the moment he had left the hospital wing. There was not a moment where he was alone.

“I didn’t really think of that…” James said slightly embarrassed, “I guess I didn’t think about everyone else and what it was doing to them …” He trailed off.

“It’s okay. You have yourself to worry about. I just thought I would remind you that you are not alone that we are feeling the same pain and the same frustration that you are in this situation. Right, do you want to try again?”

Trying again was the last thing James wanted to do, but it needed to be done. “Okay. But how about this time I ask some questions you know, so I know the dynamics of it all?”

“Sure, that works.”

“Okay, so you are one of my best friends right?” Remus nodded, “You and that Peter fellow. And Sirius” Remus’ eyes flashed slightly but he nodded anyway, “And the Lily, who is she to me?” James asked.

Remus faltered slightly. He would keep to her wishes as he knew what it was like to be on the wrong side on her and he did not want to be there again. “Sh- She is a good friend.”

James noticed the falter, but carried on anyway, “And the other girls? Alice and Albus?”

Remus chuckled lightly, “Yes they are also your friends, not as much as Lily, but still. Also, while we are here; Albus’ real name is Marlene. She was playing a joke on you”

“I gathered as much when Professor Dumbledore asked me to his office, and I proceeded to talk about how there was a student with the same name. He set me straight soon enough. No doubt he got his giggles first though” James said sourly.

“Marlene does like her jokes. Anyway, moving on…”

“Yes yes” James said briskly, “So, Who am I closest with then?”

Remus blanched but answered none the less. “Sirius most defiantly. We are a tight knit group, but you are Sirius… have a strong bond.”

The answer baffled James. On one hand he expected it because Sirius seemed like the person he was most like to with his fun personality (at least the small amount of it he had seen) and jokey manner. But then again he had hardly seen Sirius around. When Al- Marlene had shown him around the castle, Sirius had claimed to be in detention, and when they had been speaking to the girl in the great hall, Claire, Sirius had disappeared pretty quickly.

Not once had Sirius offered to help James remember anything and to James that seemed odd.

James was brought back to the present by Remus’ voice; “…trouble is you and Sirius, so you really want to talk to him about the pranks in detail and see if he can get anything out of you” Remus quietly added under his breath; “If he ever hangs around long enough…”

James silently agreed. “So, have we been friends right from the beginning of school then?”

“Oh yes, just after the sorting hat put us in Gryffindor you and Sirius befriended me, and about a week later took Peter under your wing.”

“So there’s the four of us in the group. Got it. Anything else about us four?”

“Well, we kind of nicknamed ourselves the Marauders because…” And Remus launched into a detailed explanation of how they were renowned pranksters while James looked on with excitement.

The only thing James could not shake was the feeling of being left out. It was like hearing the story for the first time. It seemed utterly crazy that he had done any of those things at all. That he and Sirius had once made a boy’s head swell twice its size resulting in 2 weeks detention. Or that they had scaled the outside of the girl’s tower just to spy on the girl slumber party.

He was not seeing himself do these things, but another unnamed, blank faced boy in his mind. Nothing felt familiar.

Lily walked down the deserted corridor at a slow pace it was only second period he day seemed to be moving so slow. As she was about to turn off down the corridor that lead to the Library, she decided instead to check in on the hospital wing to see when Madame Brown would want James to pop in for a checkup.

She hadn’t had chance yet to speak to her about it all.

When she arrived at the Hospital wing Madame Brown was bent over a bed at the far end, with sounds of whimpering coming from the bed.

“Well next time you decide to have an argument think twice about doing it at the breakfast table young man!” She scolded as she stepped out of the way to reveal a young boy with a rather large orange shoved up his nostril. “Oh hello Miss Evan”

“Hello Madam Brown, I was just wondering if I could have a word?”

“Yes yes dear” The boy from the bed looked up in anger the nurse and point to his nose. Madame Brown just tutted, “You can wait a few moments, call it penance for your silly behavior!” The young boy rolled his eyes and turned away, evidently sulking.

Madame Brown turned back to Lily, “What can I help you with then?”

“Well, I was wondering whether you were going to have James back in for any tests. After all he did have a rather large bang to the head.”

“Of course I was planning it, but the little bugger slipped out before I could arrange anything.”(Lily couldn’t help but giggle at that, it was such a James thing to do) “I wasn’t even that keen on letting him go so soon. I mean after all, this case of amnesia is new to me and I just don’t know what kind of strain his brain is being put under.” She said briskly as if scolding Lily for letting it happened.

“Yes…” Lily said quietly, “Would you like me to bring him by soon then?”

“That would be fantastic. Today would be best please. When you next see him.” Madame Brown said approvingly.

“I will do that now then…” She said, knowing that she had nothing else to do, and going to the library to look up more about James condition just seemed unappealing. Madam Brown had never seen it before, so there was a great chance there was nothing in the library to help.

She turned and left, making her way back to the heads dorm.

Using the short cuts that James had taught her not to long ago Lily was back in no time. She entered to see James and Remus still talking on the sofas and Peter having now joined them.

She made slight eye contact with Remus, who slyly shook his head indicating that there had been no remembering as of yet. Lily tried to reassure herself it was early days, and that these things took time. So she plastered a smile on her face and greeted them brightly.

“Hello, working hard I see James.” She commented, he turned to look at her and gave her a smile as fake as her own. She could see the sadness in his eyes. “Madame Brown wanted me to come and get you for a quick check up, apparently someone snuck out this morning without telling her!” Lily said with added lightness to her voice. James seemed relieved to be able to get way from Remus probing and invited the chance to leave.

“That’s fine, lets go” He said quickly, jumping up and leading out, “Thanks Remus and Pete!” He called over his shoulder as he left with Lily in tow.

For a while, neither of them said anything and they just walked in comfortable silence to the hospital wing.

“You know you really shouldn’t have left the hospital wing like that.”Lily commented finally breaking the silence. “You fell off your broom and were in a coma for 2 weeks, you should have stayed and rested.”

“No way, I wasted two week of my life in there asleep why would I want to waste more while I was awake? Plus its so boring!” He moaned like a small child.

“It may be boring Mr. Potter, but it is safe to be there! What if there was more damage done to you huh? You weren’t to know! You fell off your broom for Merlin’s sake!” Lily fussed, glaring at him.

“But I am fine! No harm done. Not even a scratch on my body!” He replied smiling lightly at her attempt to tell him off. “And what are you my mother?...Mmhmm. I didn’t think so Miss Evans.” He emphisised her name.

Lily blushed and looked down as she was walking. “No…” She mumbled, “I was just trying to be considerate!” She claimed defending herself.

“No worry, I can take care of myself Evans.” He swung an arm round her should in a friendly way and squeezed her should before letting go. She wished he would have stayed there.

They approached the hospital wing, and immediately Madame Brown started laying into James about wondering off when it was not safe. Lily kept her distance and just watched.

It was so easy just before to forget that he had amnesia and just interact with him like she always did. Just to joke around and pretend nothing was wrong. But it was, and here they were. In the hospital wing.

She tuned back in just in time to head Madame Brown ask James; “Now, have you had any headaches, nose bleeds, or anything of that nature since you left?” James shot a look at Lily and she realized no doubt, that if she had not been there he would have lied. He opened his mouth to reply, but Lily cut across him.

“No, nothing of the sort. He has been fine. But also no memories.” James nodded showing no indications that she was lying. Lily knew perfectly why she was lying, even if James did not. But she needed to lie to keep him. If she told the truth, she knew that Madame Brown would keep him in for observation.

But she was not losing him again.

“Good good” Madame Brown seemed satisfied by the answer and detected no foul play. “You have been very lucky not to have suffered any lasting damage Mr. Potter. Now you may leave. I would like to see you in a little more than a week. And if anything changes, such like nose bleeds or memories returns please do see me instantly.” James groaned and Madame Brown turned sharply to look at him, “I know it’s a pain, but it is for your own good Mr. Potter.

And with that she went back to her office muttering about ‘Quiddich being so dangerous!’. 

A/N Okay, so it was a long informative chapter. I know, more sorry’s are due for my rubbishness at being an author. If there are any of you lovely readers left THANK YOU.
What Lily asked Madame Brown will be revealed in due time, so dont you worry. 

If there’s anything that doesn’t make sense let me know, because I don’t really remember the story and I can’t remember what I have and haven’t published.

Review please please please. It’s the only way I know whats going on in your little minds. Im starting the next chapter right now because I feel bad, So here goes!

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