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By Lady Malfoy. Phwoar.

I own Sweet Luke, but not Harry Potter...

Dear mum, 
It’s been a week since I came back to this... place... and nothing out of the ordinary has happened. I accidently turned Scorpius into a mouse, but that was a small thing and it won’t happen again, I promise. I’ve been studying hard, Quidditch trials are today, so maybe I’ll win a prize or something. 
Hope you’re well and make sure dad doesn’t blow up the washing machine!

Problem Seventeen: I’m a compulsive liar. 

I can’t tell my own mum what I’m thinking in case it offends her. Even my friends don’t know everything about me. In fact, the one night stand where I lost my mind knows a little more than they do. Possibly because he was reading my mind. 

That might be a lie. It might just be me that’s confused about my own thoughts. 

I’m up at eight o’clock. On a Saturday. Why? I hear you ask. What sane person wakes up willingly at that hour? Well, I guess it’s because trials start at ten, and we want to warm up. We being Caspar, sleepy Livi, and me. 

The pitch is empty, surprise surprise, and everything is misty. In a nice, morning on the moors way, not like Dementor fog. 

“Good conditions, nice temperature, no wind, I think we’ve got a good one!” Cas rattles off. 
I ignore her, still annoyed that I’m here. Two hours isn’t a warm up, its torture. I’ve already said this a few times, so I doubt anyone will listen this time. 

Even in her comatose state, Livi thought this wouldn’t be a bad idea. She’s currently hauling the crate of balls out ready to start. Chucking me the Quaffle, she rubs her eyes. I catch it even in my state of mind, and put it gently on the ground. 

Suddenly, there are shapes in the fog. “Stupefy!” I yell, and hear a satisfying thud in reply. 

“Rose you nutcase!” I also hear Albus yelling. Huh. “That’s James you just stunned!” 

“Serves him right, creeping up on me like that,” I say proudly, “I’ll be famous for my reflexes yet!” 

“Enervate,” Albus sighs, “Shame I feel I have to wake the bugger up.” 

James groans and opens his eyes to see us two peering down at him. 

“I thought I was in heaven,” he says dreamily, “Then I saw you two.” 

“Charming,” I remark, “I wonder what Olivia will have to say about that.” 

James looks at me in frustration. 

Ah, emotional blackmail. It’s the best. 

“Guys! We’re supposed to be warming up!” Cas yells, “Al and James, you can join in!” 

I groan, and Albus sniggers. “I wondered why you were out here so early. Caspar made you!” 

I shoot him the filthiest look I can manage. “This is no laughing matter! She has unbelievable power in her muscles, and being that it’s stupid o’clock I’m not functioning properly to fight back!” 

“Just be glad you got the Weasley Quidditch skills,” James says darkly, “I saw a picture of your mum on a broom. It was like putting a fish on a Thestral.” 

“That makes no sense, you plonker,” Al says. 

“Yes it does!” James argues, “Helpless and doomed to fail.” 

“Huh,” I chip in, “He’s got a point. Mum apparates everywhere because she doesn’t like flying.” 

“Guys! Come over here and gear up!” Cas yells, louder than before, “We haven’t got all day!” 

Bracing myself, I stroll back over to her, pick up my broom and stare at her glowering face for a moment. 

“Something wrong, Cas?” I ask sweetly. 

“I AM GETTING ONTO THIS TEAM WITH OR WITHOUT YOU!” she bellows. I flinch. She hasn’t yelled that loud for a while. “Get on your broom before I go MAD!” 

I obey quickly, not even stopping to laugh at my stunned cousins. They look like they’ve been slapped. 

Cas flies up to meet us, holding the Quaffle. “Get in a circle! I throw, you catch! Understood?” 

We nod quickly, scared of another outburst. She really can be terrifying. 

We work our way through drills, stopping only when Livi falls asleep on her broom. James disappears and reappears with toast that vanishes without the help of magic, pleasing Livi, who kissed him on the cheek again for stopping her tummy growling. It was cute enough to make James blush and me smirk. 

“Half past nine!” Albus announces as I score against Caspar, for the third time in only an hour. She’s good, this girl. 

“Let’s get off the pitch,” I yell, being further away than anyone else, “So we just look amazing. People will start arriving soon.” 

So we pack up and trudge off the pitch, taking showers and refreshing our robes. Stepping fresh back out onto the pitch twenty minutes later, I realise this is a huge event. Loads of people are crammed into the middle row seats, at least fifty people are crowding around the north facing hoops, and Sweet Luke himself is on his broom in the sky, watching the scene helplessly as chaos unfolds. I can hear him mumbling.
“Uh... guys? Can we make a line, please?” 

Livi and I turn to look at Cas expectantly. She rolls her eyes, but points her wand at her throat. 

“Shut it, you lot!” Her voice echoes over the stadium. “Sw—Luke is trying to do tryouts! Those still talking might be disqualified for not obeying their captain...” 

Everyone immediately falls silent. If the voice Caspar’s using isn’t scary enough, no one wants to be disqualified. 

Sweet Luke copies Cas’s spell and makes his voice boom across the stadium in its dusky tones. “Hello, thanks for turning up and a special thanks to Caspar for giving me some control.” 

“Oh yeah, favour the band of sluts!” Someone yells. No one says a word. 

“Sluts, did you say?” I ask politely, a wicked edge to my voice that frankly sounds terrifying, “I wonder who said that? Say it to my face, sunshine, or I might snog you in a cupboard.” 

A short, pretty brunette pushes her way to the front. “I said, you’re a band of sluts,” she sneers, “Rose Weaslet, Olivia Posho-name and Caspar the blonde bitch!” 

“Harry’s ex,” Cas whispers, “Real psycho. Tried to burn his hair off.” 

“Oh goodie,” I mutter, walking towards the girl. I wait until we’re nose to nose to do anything. “Don’t be nasty, it messes up your face,” I say sweetly, and then think Levicorpus! 

I turn and walk away, leaving her dangling there. Livi shoots the pants spell at her too, for good measure. No one smack talks us. 

“Anyone else got a problem?” asks James, stepping around me protectively. 

“Why are you even here?” I ask him confusedly, “I thought you just got signed.” 

“I did...” he replies, “But then Professor Macmillan sends me a letter asking me to be a teacher! So I thought—“ 

“Oh dear lord,” I say, aghast, and turn my back on him. James in school again? No! 
No, no, no! 

Sweet Luke looks uncomfortable. “Please don’t bitch about your possible future teammates,” he says, “Split up into groups of six and wait in a line by the north hoops, please.” 

Livi, Caspar, Albus and I join two fourth years who can’t take their eyes off the floating girl, who is now screaming indignantly. Caspar holds up her wand, and the fourth years stare at her greedily, eager to see more happen to the short psycho. She must be unpopular. 

Silencio,” she says calmly, and the girl can no longer make such an annoying noise. “We must look evil, hanging that idiot upside down.” 

“Nah,” Livi waves away the accusation, “We’re just a band of sluts anyway.” 

We break down into laughter. 

“Uh, I think we should be moving,” says one of the fourth years nervously. 

Haha! Be afraid, very afraid! Who dares to speak to us, the band of sluts! 
“Oh, of course,” Livi sings, “We want to be on this team!” 

“Do you think we’ll make it?” asks the other little person. No, not Al, the other fourth year. “I’m Marcie, by the way. Marcie with an ‘i e’ not a ‘y’.” 

Yeah, your name will really help you. 

“I dunno,” I reply, “Can you fly?” 

The fourth year puffs herself up. “Yes, of course! Grace and I were voted best fliers in our class.” 

“Well, good for you and Grace. If you can fly and are willing to put in the effort, do it,” Cas encourages. 

I give her a look. “Hello, mum.” 

She gives me the finger. 


“Girls, we’re up,” Al says nervously. Suddenly, something like killer worms attacks my stomach. 

“I can’t do it!” I cry, “I suck at Quidditch! Why am I here?” 

“Get on your broom, you plonker,” Livi drawls. I listen to her, trying to control my ragged breath. Grace and Marcie are staring at me strangely. 

“Alright,” Sweet Luke says, watching the last people land and making notes on some scrap parchment, “Next group! Fly twice around the pitch as fast as you can. Ready, set, go!” 

I go shooting off; Livi and Caspar equally fast to me. Al, who wasn’t paying attention, catches up quickly. The other girls are left to plod on. We make two laps in less than twenty seconds – not a record, but not bad. We land and wait for Marcie and Grace, who land ten second after us. Not bad for young’uns. 

“Well done!” Luke yells from his lofty post, “Next!” 

I stumble towards the other groups. “I hope I get in, because you just flew into my leg, Al!” 

Al snorts. “Well if you weren’t so busy racing Livi, you’d be fine!” 

“You landed badly!” 

“You were all bad!” 

We glare at each other for a moment, and then I laugh. “We rocked!” 

He laughs too. 

“I swear to Merlin, you guys are the strangest family I’ve ever been part of,” I whirl around to see Roxanne grinning, her arm rested on Fred. Despite the age difference they’re roughly the same height. 

“Roxy!” I call delightedly, scooping both her and her brother into a hug. 

“Bloody hell!” Fred protests, “I only came to try out, and now I’m next in line to be murdered by a slut!” 

Roxanne hits him. “Fred you arsehole!” 

“What’s this about sluts I know?” Louis appears, decked out in a Ravenclaw scarf. “Nice trial, guys.” 

“Are you spying on us?” I ask suspiciously. Louis looks affronted. 

“Spying on you? No! I’m spying on Captain Heart Throb up there.” He points up at Luke, who is currently looking mildly horrified at a group of second years, one of which just crashed his broom. 

“So you admit that he’s good looking?” I ask innocently. Louis swings more towards the male side of life, but he won’t admit it. 

“Yes, I do,” he confirms, “But don’t get over excited.” 

“It’s too late,” Fred remarks, “She’s peed herself.” 

I hit him... Lightly, though. He still makes a show of being hurt. 

“C’mon, Lou!” I whine, “You’ve got to admit it one day! You like—“ 

He clamps a hand over my mouth. 

“Are you mad?” he hisses, “We’re in a crowd! And besides, I have a girlfriend!” 

My eyes just about pop out of my head. He takes his hand away slowly; watching me to make sure I don’t blurt out what we both know is true. 

“You have a girlfriend?” Roxy says, “How the hell did you do that? You know the Imperious curse is illegal, right?” 

“Oh, ha, ha. Actually, she asked me—“ 

“Well, you wouldn’t ask her, would you?” 

“—and I said yes. We’re going to Hogsmeade on the trip.” He looks immensely smug.
“Well I’m going tomorrow with Matthew, so why don’t you come too?” I ask sweetly. 

“Alright then!” Louis says, unwilling to back down despite the fact he looks terrified. 

Bloody Weasley genes. 

“Meet me by the Honeydukes tunnel,” I command, “And bring your lovely girlfriend.” 

“Fine then!” he huffs. I smile. 

“Sounds like a date.” 

“Excuse me, guys, could you pay attention?” Ah, bless Sweet Luke. 

Everyone turns to look at him, even upside-down-brunette-psycho. 

“Could the following people stay for further trials, please; Venus Shade...” 

I toned him out, yawning widely. It was a stupid idea to be up so early, truly. Why I even listen to Caspar is a mystery to me. I’d be fine without her... I think. Maybe I’d have a little difficulty with some things, but overall... 

“—Rose Weasley, Caspar Clark, Olivia Hampton-Gray, Albus Potter—“ 

“Get in there!” Caspar whisper cheers. I high five her. 

“My name sounds ridiculous,” Livi says moodily, holding her hand up for a high five of her own. 

“We got through! We got through!” Albus chants quickly under his breath. I grin at him. 

Sweet Luke finishes reading off names and claps his hands. “Uh... The rest of you, thanks for trying out.” 

Loads of people trudge off the pitch, leaving about fifteen people. That’s eight people to get rid of. 

I look over my competition quickly. A couple look like they’re about to have a heart attack, one is shaking visibly and another is swaying. 

Good so far. 

Sweet Luke lands near us and beckons. We all walk over. 

“Alright, we’re going to do some drills,” he pauses to pick up the Quaffle. “Don’t get on your brooms yet. Get in a circle, please. I throw, you catch. Got it?” 

I exchange a look with Livi. This sounds very, very familiar. Sweet Luke passes to the shaking guy, who fumbles it but still holds strong and throws it back to him. He rockets it at Cas, who catches it and whams it right back at him. He throws it to some other boy, and carries on playing despite the horrific drop the kid makes. This goes on for a while, and then Luke announces we should get on our brooms to do the same thing. 

Further trials go on for six long hours, by the end of which I’m tired, hungry and quite irritable. 

“—fly twice around the pitch, catch the Quaffle, dodge the Bludger, and then take it from the top,” Luke says, and I give up. 

“For fucks sakes!” I yell, “Can’t you just pick a fucking team and be done with it!” 

Everyone turns to look at me. Caspar has a look of total horror on her face, asking why I’m so stupid. I’m red faced, mud splattered, glaring at Sweet Luke. I never thought I’d glare at Sweet Luke. 

“Rose,” Sweet Luke says, “Please go wait on the stands.” 

I fly down to the ground, muttering every bad word I was ever taught by James. 

“Fuck... stupid twatting game... shitting bloody hell!” 

I stomp into the changing room, stripping off my sweaty kit and turning on the showers. Soothing my aching muscles under the hot stream, I keep glaring at everything and anything. 

Why do I always open my mouth like that? Can’t I just be patient? 

Bloody feet. Toenails need cutting, again. And my legs could do with a wax. 

Hey! Now I’m back at Hogwarts I can do that with magic! 

I rush back into the changing room and grab my wand, twirling it through my hair to straighten it perfectly. 

Pointing the stick of wood and unicorn hair at my feet, my toenails pedicure themselves perfectly. 

I love magic! 

Quickly, almost faster than flying, I flick my wand and all the hair pulls itself off my legs.
“Ow, shit!” I yell. I forgot how painful it is. 

But at least they look good now. 

“Rose, are you in there?” Livi calls from outside, “Luke wants to see you.” 

“What, now?” I call back. 

“Yeah now!” 

I sigh and get dressed, vanishing the pile of hair on the floor. 

Striding calmly out of the doors, I notice everyone has mysteriously disappeared. In fact, they’re flying so high above they look like ants. 

“Rose,” Sweet Luke calls from my right. 

I walk over to him. He looks me up and down. 

“Yes?” I ask, feeling all of ten years old and waiting to be told I couldn’t have a pony.
“I know the process is long, and I’m sorry. Practices are going to be on the notice board – be there.” 

I shrug nonchalantly, like I knew he’d want me on the team. “Alright, see you there, Luke.” 


Apologies for the lack of Scorpius! I promise next chapter there will be contact of the blonde kind...
xx Ella

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