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Boy
A Voldemort and Anna (OC) one-short

I used to know him, back before everything went wrong. I look back on it now though and I just can’t see the same boy he used to be. He was always a little different of course and I never minded at all, but then his parents died and he was sent away. He changed a lot after that. He became more distant and alone. It worried me but there was nothing I could do. I was just a child back then, like him.

Now though, he’s not the same. I don’t know why he changed so much or turned out the way he did. I can’t say I support him but I would hate to see him killed. I had a crush on him at one time, but not anymore. I don’t think I could ever feel that way anymore. The feelings that I had for him faded when he changed. I wish that I could see the boy I used to know once more, but I see through him that the boy he used to be is no longer with us. The man before us now is not the child I once knew.

Everything about him has changed; I just wish that I understood why. What made him so unhappy? What made him stray so far from his path? What went so wrong? If only I understood, but I don’t think there’s any way I ever could. I can’t see inside his mind and I don’t know what he thinks. Still, if I did know would I understand any of it even if he explained it all to me?

I said it before, he was always different and I didn’t always understand him, but now when it comes to him I’m just so lost. I don’t see why he would want things this way. Why would he work so hard towards something like this? For what? What is his aim, his one true goal? I just can’t see it no matter how many times I look, no matter what angle I try to see it from. I just don’t understand.

I kind of wish I knew a way to save him, to bring him back to who he used to me. Did you know that he used to be happy at one time? I don’t mean just a smile or a laugh. I mean real happiness, not this happy he tries to play now. Then again, maybe he isn’t playing now, maybe back then when I thought he was happy, it was all just a lie. The more I think about it and him, the more confused I get.

There are so many questions swimming through my head. I want to go up to him and ask them all. I want to know what happened. I want to know where his heart went or why he cast it away like he did. I just want to understand and see the world through his eyes. I don’t believe I’ll ever be able to, let alone get the chance too.

Often enough I’ve been told that things aren’t always easy, but I wish now that I had been told that things are very hard and even more confusing. At least then I might have been better prepared.

I looked up now to his face, he doesn’t look the same, like a monster from a horror movie. He’s rather frightening but still I can not turn away. I want to try and see the boy I used to know somewhere in that crazy body of a man. I don’t see that boy though, no matter how long I stare. I wonder if he feels my eyes on him, but then why does he not speak? I wish he would say something to me, let me know that he’s still there, somewhere inside that body. He never speaks to me though I have heard his voice many times before.

Finally I bring myself to look away a frown crossing my face. Another chance and another day I still do not understand. To some extend I am afraid to go up and ask. What answer will I get? Will I be told that the boy I used to know is gone? Will that fear of mine be realized, for real this time? I don’t think I could face that. That may be why I don’t go up and speak to him.

I do not fear this man like so many around me. I can’t fear him; I can not bring myself to feel the fear. It may just be because I am ignorant to the fact that he’s not the same boy I used to know. No matter how many times I tell myself that the boy I used to know is gone and hidden far away, somewhere deep inside. Still, I hold onto the hope that somewhere inside him that boy still remains and I would like to meet him again someday.

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