Confessions of Adhara Greengrass | Confessions of pick-up lines, Scorpius' serenade and arguments
Meanwhile, inside the mind of Scorpius Hyperion *snort* Malfoy…
Honestly, she’s laughing at me. What’s so funny with the fact that I like Rose? I mean… I’m a fairly good-looking bloke… scratch that, I’m like, super good-looking, yeah. And, I thought it was quite romantic to write a poem. I mean, it was like, a really good idea. And, I’ve memorized it. I was so proud of myself. And, I haven’t even told Albus… I decided to tell Adhara first. And she laughed at me. She’s still laughing. Salazar, she can be so rude sometimes.
“What’s so funny, anyway?” I snap at her.
She’s gasping for air in between fits of laughter. “You… liking Rose! A poem!” she giggles.
She can be so cruel. Does she know that I am very mad at her at this moment? I try and make my mad face at her to intimidate her. Which is a cross between a frown and a glare.
She just continues laughing.
I cross my arms over my chest. “Well, I don’t see what’s so funny,” I huff at her.
She’s still laughing.
Honestly, what a witch. Scorpius, my brain reprimands me, how could you think something so malicious? You’re right brain, sorry.
She’s still laughing. She’s such a diva.
I open the door to the broom closet after much struggle. “Just so you know,” I say to her, “I’m leaving.”
And she just continues laughing. Ugh!
Scorpius, my brain says to me, you’re acting like a drama king.
Shut up, brain, I argue, I’m having a breakdown, I am fully entitled to have a nervy b.
Are you sure you’re not homosexual? My brain asks me.
Ugh! I huff at my brain.
Like the good friend that I no doubt am, I have decided to go visit Albus inside the Hospital Wing. I even brought him a gift: a chocolate frog, well more like half because I got hungry on the second floor. But, it’s the thought that counts.
I walk into the Hospital Wing and head towards Albus’ bed. And stop dead. There, leaning against the foot of the bed is Rose Weasley. Breathe. Breathe. Okay. Calm. Be suave. I walk closer and Albus spots me and smiles.
“Hey, Scorp,” he says, cheerfully.
“Hey, Al,” I say, my eyes glued to the back of Rose’s head.
Rose turns around and narrows her eyes at me. I instantly feel intimidated by those clear blue eyes. I smile unsurely. She glares at me. Cor, she is so difficult to please. I walked closer and stand next to Rose. Breathe, Scorpius, breathe.
Oh, my god, she’s right there. Quick, brain, think of something charming to say. “You have the shiniest, most silky hair I have ever seen,” I say. Albus winces. Rose narrows her eyes at me, again. What? It was a charming thing to say!
What is it with girls and all their weird signals? I know Rose likes me. I knew it from the day she hexed me into a ferret in first year. She’s just shy about her feelings for me. Adhara says I’m delusional, but I see the look of love in her eyes when she jinxes me. It is love. But, then, when I flirt with her she glares at me. Or sneers. Or hexes me. Or my personal favourite, when she narrows her eyes at me, Cor, she is so sexy.
I will never understand women and their tempers. Why oh, why did I have to fall in love? And with a Weasley at that. Cupid, you are so unfair.
“How’s your head?” I ask Albus, casting a subtle sideways glance at Rose.
“It’s all right,” says Albus, shrugging. “It doesn’t hurt as much. And Poppy said I can leave tomorrow.”
“Wasn’t it your cousin who whacked the bludger that sent Albus into a tree?” asks Rose, raising a slim red eyebrow.
Cor, Adhara, you’re always ruining things for me. I cough uncomfortably.
“It wasn’t her fault,” says Albus, “she was trying to keep it from hitting the team members.”
“By knocking out the captain?” asks Rose.
“It was an accident, Rosie,” says Albus wearily.
Rose sniffs. I stand there awkwardly. Albus just lies there. Merlin, this is so awkward, say something to make things less awkward, after all Adhara says every awkward silence a gay baby is born. How many babies do you reckon that is?
Eleanor interrupts my train of thought. “Hello, Scorpius!” she shouts across the ward. Sadly, Eleanor is still feeling the side effects of the exploded Potion. And shouting profanities every now and then. Honestly, she said Adhara has a voodoo doll of Gemma. That’s bullocks. Adhara isn’t that… insane. Well, she probably is…
“Hi, Eleanor,” I say, smiling.
At that precise moment a very strange boy walks into the ward. He has sort of long blond stringy hair and he’s wearing ill-fitting Slytherin Quidditch robes and he has a mustache. Salazar, that mustache can rival old Sluggie’s.
We’re all staring at the peculiar boy. And wondering how he got Slytherin Quidditch robes until Eleanor shouts, “Adhara!”
You see, she won’t stop yelling profanities.
We’re all still staring at the peculiar boy. Until I realize it. It’s Adhara in disguise!
Blimey, her fake mustache looks quite real.
“Adhara?” I ask.
“Why do you fools keep referring to me as this ‘Adhara’ person. I do not know this person you speak of.”
Oh my, I think we’ve embarrassed the poor boy.
“Adhara,” says Rose, “Don’t be silly, why are you dressed up as a boy?”
It is Adhara!
“My name is Salazar Slytherin,” shouts the Adhara/peculiar boy, defensively.
No, it’s Salazar Slytherin! Wait a minute… that doesn’t make sense…He’s like a million years old. It is Adhara!
“What on earth are you doing?” I ask her.
She looks around self-consciously. “That is highly confidential,” she says importantly. You see what I mean? Rude.
Eleanor takes that moment when we are all staring at Adhara in disbelief to jump on her, pulling her fake mustache off.
“Eleanor, you stupid sushi!” Adhara screams at Eleanor.
Eleanor looks rather confused. “What did I do?” she asks.
Adhara clears her throat. “I came here to see you, and you blow my cover, some best mate you are,” says Adhara, crossing her arms over her chest.
Eleanor is getting all huffy and turning red.
Adhara pulls off the Quidditch robes and sits on the end of Eleanor’s bed while Eleanor is shouting defensively at her.
Girls are so bonkers.
Adhara and Eleanor are discussing in harsh whispers. I turn to Albus and Rose. Albus looks confused. Rose looks incredulous.
“Your cousin is completely mad,” she states.
“So I’ve noticed,” I say. Well, what? It’s true! I can’t defend Adhara at this point, it would show I was biased.
Poppy comes into the ward. “Mister Potter? I’ll have a look at you now,” she says.
Albus goes off after Poppy into her office.
Adhara and Eleanor are still arguing.
I feel so awkward. Rose is standing right there. I think now would be a good time to serenade her.
I pull out the piece of parchment where I wrote the poem down. You know, just incase I forget out of nervousness. I swear I memorized it.
God, she is so beautiful, with her thick dark auburn hair and her wide blue eyes and graceful eyebrows and her plump lips—
“Scorpius,” snaps Rose, narrowing her eyes, “Stop looking at me!”
I avert my eyes quickly. Gosh, she is so scary.
Okay. Here goes nothing:
I clear my throat uncomfortably and Rose looks up and stares at my nervous demeanor curiously.
And then I begin to sing.
“Red rose, Red Rose,
Loving, caressing you.
I am interrupted because Rose begins to hit me with a book.
“You sicko pervert!” she shouts at me.
This is what I get for being romantic. Bloody Hell, I am never copying a Muggle poem again.
Rose stalks out of the ward her hair flying behind her.
Adhara walks over. “What was all that about?” she asks.
“I tried to serenade her, but she thought I was trying to get fresh with her,” I say.
“Get fresh?” she asks, quirking an eyebrow.
“Yes,” I say huffily, “get fresh, like, trying to hit on her.”
Adhara nods. “I wish I had been there to see it,” she says sadly.
Merlin, she is such a dreadful cousin!
She eyes my appearance. “Uh, Scorpius? Why are you carrying a purse?”
“It not a purse,” I say defensively, “It’s a satchel!”
“Sometimes I question your sexuality,” she says gravely.
Oh, for Salazar’s underpants, I am not gay! Wait a moment… why was it another male’s underpants that I was just thinking about?
“I’m not gay,” I say.
She looks at me blankly.
“Just so you know...” I say casually.
“Scorpius,” she says, resting a hand on my shoulder, “it’s not healthy to beat around the bush with your feelings.”
“I’m not gay!” I shout, “I like Rose!”
“Okay,” she says, looking at me like I’m crazy. I am totally and completely sane. I don’t talk to myself, well, only sometimes. But, that is completely not the point.
Aha, insanity, my brain taunts me.
Oh, my treacle tart, my brain commentary is back! Leave me alone, brain!
Don’t worry, replies my brain, I’m not here half the time anyway.
“You know what, Adhara?” I say, trying to contain my anger, feeling on the point of a complete nervy b spaz, “I’m getting really upset with the way you treat me.”
She looks at me blankly. “Scorpius, for Merlin’s blue bikini, it’s all right if you’re gay.”
“I am not gay!” I shout. She looks at me like I’ve gone mad. “Don’t look at me like that, Adhara Elvendork Greengrass!”
She gasps audibly. There’s a moment of silence.
Cor, I’ve really done it this time.
Girls lose their tempers all the time with me. What is it that I’m doing wrong?
Note to self: read Witch Weekly more often.
Adhara is glaring at me. “You did not just go there,” she spits venomously.
“Yes, I did,” I say, putting a hand on my hip.
She glares at me more. “Well, at least my name isn’t Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy,” she says coolly, despite the death stare she’s giving me. “What did Uncle Draco and Aunt Astoria think you were? A hyper Scorpion?”
Now its my turn to gasp. She did not just go there. Oh, bloody hell, why is it that I can never think of good comebacks? I glare back at her.
“Well, at least my middle name isn’t Elvendork,” I say lamely.
Wow, how original, Scorpius, my brain says.
Shut up, brain!
Adhara gasps again. She looks around self-consciously. No one is in the ward except Eleanor… who’s talking to a wall?
“Well, at least my middle name is unisex, yours is just stupid,” she says defensively.
“It’s not stupid, its manly,” I say indignantly.
“Well, clearly Aunt Astoria and Uncle Draco judged you a little too fast seeing as their manly son now carries a satchel and reads Witch Weekly,” she says meanly.
“That was only once!” I shout, instantly regretting my honesty, “And for the last time, it’s a satchel!”
We glare at each other. I feel really sad inside. This is our first real fight.
Adhara is biting her lip unsurely. “I’m sorry, Scorp, I didn’t mean to insult your dignity,” she says quietly.
“It’s all right,” I say, “And your middle name isn’t all that bad, blame it on the excessive interbreeding of purebloods.”
She shrugs. I decide to hug her. We stand there in an awkward hug. Merlin, we’re never this creepy.
She pulls back. “When the hell are we ever serious?” she asks.
I think about it for a moment. “Never,” I agree.
Albus hobbles into the ward.
Adhara's cheeks turn a deep crimson.
"Hey, where'd Rose go?" he asks.
Now its my turn to blush.
I stutter something about her having to study.
I look between Albus and Adhara, who are both very awkward.
And then I think of it: My master plan. Involving Adhara, Albus, a broom closet and that locking spell we learnt in Charms. I am a genius.
And then Gemma walks in.
Oh, right. I had forgotten about her whilst planning my master plan to put Albus and Adhara locked in a broom closet together.
Well, Gemma proposes a slight problem.
Maybe I can get Eleanor to confound her… you know, only for a few hours…
… I am not evil.
And then I turn to see Eleanor jump on Gemma.
Sweet Salazar, Eleanor really is a beast.
Author’s Note Thanks for reading! I really appreciate all the positive feedback that you readers give me for this :)
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