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No one could convince Ron to leave his room; not even Hermione, though admittedly her bursting into fits of the giggles did not do well to earn her favour back with Ron. He still believed that she was to blame for his dreadful humiliation, and he was adamant that he would never ever forgive her. In fact, he was certain that he didn’t want to be married to her anymore; he never wanted to see her again. This was where Hermione burst into the room, blasting the door open with her wand and sending pieces of splintered wood everywhere, and poking Ron hard in the chest screaming something about “AT OUR WEDDING YOU SWORE YOU’D STAY WITH ME FOREVER!” or something like that anyway; Harry and Ginny were trying to have a conversation in their bedroom but unfortunately the noisiness of their neighbours rendered this impossible.

         They only stopped arguing about “swimming trunks” and “wedding vows” when Rose stormed out of her room to kick what remained of the door and tell her parents to “SHUT THE BLOODY HELL UP!” This shocked the whole house enough to make everyone shut up, and silence followed, broken only by Ron muttering, “Dear God… she is a bit like me after all…”

         (Admittedly, Rose did have red hair too.)

         Albus had stolen a bed near the window and James insisted that he wanted it. There was another bed by the window, but Hugo had stolen it whilst James wasn’t looking. Lily and Rose had decided that they would share a single bed, sleeping at either end despite there being quite enough beds for everyone. Ginny had thought it unwise to put the children all in one room; can you imagine the mess?? But they insisted they wanted to be together, that it would be fun, that they could learn to appreciate how important they were to each other a lot more… No one believed this rubbish. The responsible adults perfectly understood that they just wanted to tease each other, and make lots of noise and mess and then destroy the room so they’d have to move in with their parents… it was going to be awful. Who had suggested this holiday??

         “Allllllllll!” James whined, “I want this bed! I was aiming for it when I walked in; everyone could see that!”      

         “How were you aiming for it?” Albus asked sceptically.

         “I was…” James struggled to answer, “I was looking at it! With my eyes.”

         He opened them very wide and pointed at them, trying to creep Albus out. Albus had been frightened of eyes ever since his first visit to the opticians in Diagon Alley, and the wizard had put a huge, thick pair of spectacles on Albus’s nose, so that his eyes grew about five times in size and looked bigger than his actual head. The three-year-old Albus had been most disturbed by this. 

         “But I got here first,” Albus reasoned, “So it’s mine. Go find another bed.”

         “NO!” James said, and he whipped the duvet off it, so Albus tumbled onto the floor, “HAHA I have your duvet! You can’t sleep here now!”

         Albus slapped out at James, but James took a neat step back so Albus fell onto the floor.

         “Oof!” said Albus, getting up and securing his glasses back on his nose.

         “You’re such a big fat bully James,” said Lily, ignoring a steaming Rose storm in having just screamed at her parents, “Give Al his covers back!”

         “Or what?” James taunted her, “What you going to do about it?”

         “I’ll…” Lily cast her eyes around for inspiration, “… steal yours!”

         Her eyes met James’ and they both simultaneously glanced sideways at the bed that James had temporarily dumped his stuff on. Quick as a flash Lily was underneath the duvet and had then stolen it.

         “But I still have a duvet…” James said, holding Albus’s in his hands, “You fail smelly Lily!”

         “Not anymore!” Albus took advantage of James’ distraction and stole it straight back. He then sat on it, and licked it, so James wouldn’t take it back; James hated saliva.

         Lily giggled.

         “Good one Al! Now I still have James’ duvet… what shall I do with it?” she pondered, in a mock thoughtful voice.

         “You could give it back,” James suggested shrugging and putting his hands in his pockets, acting like he didn’t care. He knew Lily would get bored if he acted like he didn’t care; he thought he was being very clever. “Reverse psychology”, was what it was called. He was so clever…

         “No… no that’s a boring idea,” Lily said, hugging the duvet tightly. It was a lot bigger than her, so it trailed along the floor and she had to grip it very firmly in her little arms. Her malevolent face was still poking over the top, brown eyes glinting.

         “You could flush it down the loo?” said Hugo, sitting proudly on his un-attacked bed, in optimum position next to the window, with perfect scenic views and its own blue blind.

         “Oh Hugo! You genius!” Lily praised him, and hurried away to the toilet as fast as she could, which wasn’t very as the duvet was rather large and lumpy.

         James, thinking that Lily wouldn’t even try, didn’t react quick enough to stop her. He had only removed his hands from his pockets as Lily shuffled out the room, at a close to lightning pace, but not quite.

         Then… the toilet flushed.

         “NO!” shouted James.

         “What’s going on?” Harry had poked his head out his bedroom door, to see James thunder past down the hall, and stop outside the bathroom, and then open his lung into a full scale – “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”       

         Harry rushed to his side, and there he saw Lily flushing the toilet, which had been filled with – Harry could only assume here – a duvet. It hadn’t fitted, and Lily was flushing away, getting it soaked in one section. James was trying to pull it out, but Lily was holding on with all her might, laughing like mad.

         “That’ll teach you James Potter - stealing people’s bed things!” she told him, now hooking her feet behind the toilet cistern so that she would win the tug of war.

         “Relashio!” Harry pointed his wand at the duvet, and both children simultaneously let go. James flew backwards into the opposite wall, and Lily fell down the toilet, but this was so full of wet duvet that this didn’t matter.

         “What were you doing?” Harry demanded of them both, just as Ginny eventually arrived, wearing a new floaty white dress.

         “What do you think?” she asked Harry coyly, swishing her skirt around, completely oblivious to the scene in the bathroom. The dress was new, and she was very proud of it.

         “Not now Lily,” Harry dismissed her, before turning back to James and Lily – wait… that was wrong…

         “I’m Ginny! Not Lily!” Ginny told him, slapping his arm.

         “What? I know you’re not!” Harry told her, looking at her in surprise, unaware that he had just addressed his wife with his daughter’s name. Ginny rolled her eyes, and grabbed his ear demanding again, “Do you like my dress?”

         “I’d go out with you,” Harry answered, looking at her up and down, “Yeah, do you want to get a drink sometime?”

         “Oh Harry…” Ginny said, giggling and going red, “I’d like that drink though…”

         She bit her lip and looked up at him through her eyelashes, whilst twirling her skirt; she was trying to seduce him in a comedic way, but Harry had been seduced a long time ago… she didn’t need to resort to this, he thought…      

         “Erm… I’m trying to tell Lily off… right now,” Harry said, trying not to laugh, “She’s been naughty…”

         Just then James let out a yelp; he’d been distracted by Ginny’s arrival, and hadn’t been paying attention to Lily. Lily, taking advantage of her distracted Dad and brother had eased open the bathroom window, and put the duvet through it with a –

         “Wooooo!” she said, “There it goes!”

         It flapped down into the garden outside, landing in a large bush that looked rather spiky. It clung onto the bush like an overweight ghost. Harry put his face in his hands, saying “Oh Lily, oh Lily no…”

         James tried to grab onto his little sister’s hair, but she dived under his lunge with agility inherited from her father, and rolled into the hall, before diving into the safety of the bedroom, where she was protected by Hugo.

         “LILY!” shouted Ginny, marching off after her, storming into their bedroom.

         “Dad what will I do?” James despaired, leaning out the window, mourning for the loss of his duvet; it was twitching up at him, due to a light wind that was rustling the bush… it almost like the lost duvet was waving at him mournfully, as though understanding that it would never see James again…

         “Don’t worry,” Harry said, moving James to one side and pointing his wand out the window:

         “Wingardium Leviosa,” Harry said, and the duvet joyously rose into the air, blocking out the sun and causing its ray to flare out either side of it… it could’ve been an angel…

         “Oh wow!” James said breathlessly, “Thanks Dad!”

         He pulled his duvet close, hugging it, telling it that it was safe now. No more Lily’s would hurt it… Nothing would get it now.

         “James… that’s been down the toilet,” Harry reminded him. James did not care… he didn’t think he’d care about anything anymore.

         “Just goes to show what he thinks about personal hygiene,” Ginny said, wrinkling her nose.

         “People have done poos in there,” said Lily, absolutely delighted. She had crept back and was now peeking into the bathroom, using her small height to remain underneath the eye line of her parents.

         “You’re a poo Lily,” James said, walking past her, and determined to put his duvet in its rightful position: on the bed.

         “You’re a poobum James,” Lily said, following her brother back into the bedroom, and standing on the trailing duvet that he was pulling behind him.

         “You’re a stinky pooey smell bum,” James said, “And get off!”

         He gave the duvet a yank and Lily flew off and landed with a thump on the floor. She looked at Harry beseechingly, willing him to tell James off.

         “I’m sorry Lily,” Harry said, pulling her to her feet, “But you really did ask for that.”

         “Hmph,” said Lily and she stalked off, back into the bedroom where she struck up a very “serious” conversation about how evil Harry was.

         The rest of the afternoon was fairly uneventful, with everyone just wanting to settle in before embarking on more adventurous things the next day. Ron finally emerged from his room at about five o-clock, due to issues involving food… in that he wanted some. He skulked around, trying to avoid everyone. Harry, Ginny and Hermione tried to save his dignity by not laughing at him, but unfortunately the children were going completely the wrong way about cheering him up; they kept laughing, and their laughter sent Ginny off, which sent Hermione off, which sent Harry off. Harry tried to remind Ron, that he had laughed last out of everybody, which must surely mean that he’s the nicest one. Ron didn’t agree.

         After a round of hot chocolate and quiet conversation and book reading, everyone deduced that after all the hard travelling an early night was surely called for. James tried to make a reasoned argument as to why this was not a good idea, but he this potentially good argument was ruined by a yawn. His yawn then made everyone else yawn, so there was a moment where everyone was inhaling air very heavily. This sounded and looked so stupid that everyone got the giggles, until Rose looked up from her book with a very Hermione-ish look upon her face, which then made everyone laugh even more. Altogether, it was a very giggly evening, and it was at least another hour before anyone went to bed.

            And whilst they were in bed, they all laughed again, so chuckling could be heard through all the walls in the house, although by this time, no one was sure what was funny, and the giggling was soon replaced by snores.

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