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Flashback: August 28th, 9:03 p.m.
“Where’s Remus?” Marlene yelled over the pounding music. She swung her bottle of firewhiskey around in the air, and I grabbed at it laughing so she wouldn’t knock anyone out. Marlene was a horrible drunk, and I didn’t understand why anyone would drink that much…

“I don’t know he said he would be here. I’m sure he’s on his way.” I called at an equally loud volume. We were at one of James Potter’s infamous end of the summer parties. The music was booming, the firewhiskey was flowing, and everyone was dancing. It was one of his best ever. He had out done himself with the decorations as well. There were flashing lights, and sparkling streamers everywhere. I would have to ask him what charms he used some other time.

“He’s missing the best party ever! Woo!” She said swinging her hips around erotically and gaining attention of a few guys that were sliding by, one of which grabbed her and began to dance with her. Poor guy, drunk Marlene was a wild dancer that no guy was ever ready for.

“I’m going to go look for him, ‘kay?” I called to her though she wasn’t paying attention and instead focusing on her next dancing victim. I laughed as I turned and began to look around the party.

It didn’t take me long to spot his gorgeous reddish-brown hair. I hurried over to him and covered his eyes with my hands from behind. He jumped, startled.

“Guess who?” I said into his ear, smiling. He took my hands and lowered them from his face before turning around. He didn’t even have to speak for me to notice something was off. “What’s up?” I said slowly as his amber eyes looked at me with exhaustion.

“Can we talk?” He said slowly. I nodded, and he took my wrist and pulled me through the crowded room. He pulled open a door that led to the Potter’s study. There were bookshelves lining the walls and large brown armchairs in the middle. He leaned against one, not meeting my gaze.

“Remus, what is it?” I reached for him. Had someone died? But he didn’t look sad… He looked like he was being forced to do something, but not even that. He looked like he was about to do a chore.

“I don’t really know how to say this.” He rubbed the side of his face with his hand. A gesture he did whenever he wasn’t sure what to say. “I don’t know where to begin. So I’m just going to come right out with it.”

“Okay.” I said slowly, my stomach knotted.

“I think we should break up.” I heard the words he said, but they didn’t registered. I stared at his face as though waiting for him to tell me he was joking. I stared at him for what seemed like hours, but he didn’t say anything more. Emotions started to build inside me, sadness, pain, confusion, anger… Then one took over.

“WHAT THE HELL?!” He obviously wasn’t expecting that outburst, and he jumped back away from me a few inches. “ARE YOU SERIOUS?” I screamed on the top of my lungs.

“Addy, I… I just don’t think that this is a good relationship for either of us.”

“BULLSHIT! THAT’S THE STUPIDEST REASON I’VE EVER HEARD!” The other emotions caught up with me, and my voice cracked as I said, “You better give me a good reason right now!”

“I-I don’t think I love you anymore. I just think it’s time.” He said tentatively. Then I humiliatingly burst into tears. He reached for me, but I moved away.

“How can you not love me? I’ve given you everything! I’ve done everything!” I cried.

“Addy, it’s not you it’s – ”

“Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare give me that line! So what, we go out for three fucking years and you just decide out of the blue that you don’t love me anymore?” I said covering my face.

“I’ve been thinking about it for a while now.”

“Great! So I’m just the fool. Thanks a lot!” He reached for me again, but I pushed him away. “Don’t touch me! Don’t act like you care! Save it!”

I turned and pushed through the door back into the booming music. I gasped for air in between my sobs, and ignored the looks that people were giving me. I felt like someone had ripped out my heart, trampled on it, and tried to put the broken pieces back in place. I felt so rejected, so horrible…

I elbowed my way through the crowd ignoring the many rude comments I received. I wasn’t sure where I was going, but I ended up at the bar. The man behind it smiled at me, and said something like I must be having a rough time and told me the drink he shoved at me would take my problems away. I drank, wanting to find an escape, wanting the burning liquid to somehow, some way, take away the pain.

It didn’t help. After I had had too many drinks to count I felt horrible, and now I couldn’t even walk straight. I bumped into person after person. I would reach for someone for support, but they kept pushing me away; rejecting me.

I somehow made it to the stairwell. A rope blocked it off, but I pushed by it and stumbled my way up the stairs wanting to escape. I pushed through the first door I saw, and fell onto the unmade bed inside of it.

“Uh, hello?” A voice said from the corner. It was only then that I looked up and saw Sirius lounging in an armchair in the corner holding a letter in his hand.

“What are you up here?” The sentence didn’t sound right, and my words were slurred.

“I’m taking a breather…” Why was the room spinning? “What are you doing up here?”

“Suffering.” I said matter-of-factly.

“Oh.” He got up slowly and set the letter onto his window sill, crossing the room and sitting next to me where I leaned against the bed from a kneeling position on the floor that I had somehow gotten into. He grabbed me tightly around the waist, and effortlessly pulled me onto the bed beside him.

“Am I pretty?” I said drunkenly. My head felt fuzzy and I couldn’t make out his face so I leaned in closer.

He chuckled. “Your breath smells horrible. You’re so wasted.”

“Am I pretty?” I demanded.

“Of course you are, Addison.” I fell back onto his bed staring at his ceiling. I didn’t feel all that great. On top of my broken heart, my stomach now felt horrible. My heart, the pain hit me in full force. Tears were flowing from my eyes within seconds. “Woah, woah, Addison! What’s wrong?” He was touching my face.

“Why doesn’t he love me? Why aren’t I good enough?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Oh, like you don’t know.” I scoffed. “He probably told you WEEKS ago, and you’ve just been laughing at me ever since knowing that I – ”

“Stop! I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“He broke up with me! Okay? There! I said it!”

“Remus broke up with you?” He sounded astounded maybe he really hadn’t known.

“Are you going to make me say it again?”

“No, no, but Addison. I’m so sorry.” He was leaning back on his elbow beside me, and I didn’t know what made me do it. Maybe it was the my desperation to want to feel loved, or the high amounts of alcohol pulsing through my body, but suddenly I was on top of him kissing him urgently willing him to kiss me back. At first he was frozen, and I felt my heart beginning to fall a part even more; I was about to be rejected again. And then just as I was about to pull away, his arms wrapped around me, and he kissed me back.

***

I should have gone after him, but I couldn’t. I sat frozen to my bed. I had really hurt him, and whether or not we were broken up, I had still hurt him, and I loved him, so that hurt me as well.

I sat there for I don’t know how long. Carina came in a sat with me for a while, her arm around me, holding me comfortingly. I barely heard her reassure me that mum and dad had gone to London early in the morning so they had heard nothing. After a while she whispered her apologizes and left to go somewhere.

I stared at the wall. It was off white, and had a nice texture. The longer I focused on it, the more I could work out pictures from the shadows. There was a bird, and then a bird perched on a nest, then a bird on a nest in a tree.

The tapping brought me back. It was persistent, and my need to shut it up broke me from my statue form. I turned and looked at the window. There was a mangy owl sitting there in the rain waiting impatiently with a letter tied to its leg.

I slowly got up and walked over to it, pulling the window open. It hopped in shaking off its wings as it did.

I untied the piece of parchment from its leg, and shooed it back outside, shutting the window behind it. I unrolled it slowly:

Addison,
    I think we really need to talk. Please meet me.
-Sirius


I crumpled the note in my hand and threw it at the off white wall. My body shook as I cried the tears I had been holding in all day. I threw open my closet’s door and pulled out my old broomstick.

I needed something to keep my mind off of what had happened. Flying through a dense forest at high speeds seemed to be a good plan.

---

A/N: Chapter two! I hope you liked it. I hoped you got the it was a flashback in the begnning and then present at the end. Tell me what you think. I love reviews! Chapter three coming soon.

P.S. I'm going to be changing the banner to my story in the near future, so if that's how you like identify it, just be aware it's going to be changed.

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