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Chapter Twelve: Boys Like Girls

While Hermione and Remus were working out some of those just absolutely delightful issues that happen to come along with things like their every thought being replayed to the world, James was getting his manly strut on down Hogsmeade’s main street, searching in vain for Lily. “Lily!” He called out, then waited a moment before repeating himself. “Oh, Lilyflower - I’ve got something to tell you!” He had walked up and down the street several times by now, passing The Three Bromsticks at least five times without stopping once for a butter beer (This, folks, is a record. Take careful note, now), and he still hadn’t found her.

Not that there wasn’t a plethora of other interesting things to amuse him while he searched, of course: there was much shrieking as the female’s (Okay, the little boys were shrieking too) realized that their date was only sitting through the few hours they spent in Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop was only for the sex he might get afterwards, finding out that your boyfriend is cheating on you with the easiest girl in the school, and other fun discoveries that the inhabitants of Hogsmeade were getting today. It was practically like being on Bill Nye, really. Minus the hypnotic intro.

James attempted calling for his Lily again, and this time he was rewarded; in the small alley in between Zonko’s and the closed-for-the-cold-season ice cream parlor, came a muffled “Ugh!” that could only be from a certain stubborn green-eyed seventh year.

“I’m coming, princess!” He called, grinning widely as he ran down the alley from which he had heard the scream. Finally, curled up in a lethal ball, was the red headed girl, who’s lips were moving almost silently, repeating her own war cry:

“Don’t think anything, don’t think anything, don’t think - there he is. Err, Hi James.” She said the latter in a bit louder tone, the false cheerfulness oozing through her voice; James was so glad he had found her. “James doesn’t even need the frickin spell, he speaks his mind enough already.” Lily continued muttering to herself angrily.

“How are you on this fine, fine, day?” James questioned, squishing himself down next to her as close as he could get. Surprising, Lily didn’t flinch away, not even a millimeter.

“Wonderful, thanks to you.” Lily said, and James noticed that he voice didn’t sound as sarcastic as usual, almost as if...almost as if she actually meant it. James’s smile grew a little bit wider, threatening to cut his face in half, even though his hope was a feeble one.

“Mine too, Evans, mine too.”


Meanwhile, Sirius would have been scaring his not one, not two, but three female escorts if they had been bothering to listen to a word of what he was saying, thanks to the infuriated muttering that was going on, most of it directed at James.

Luckily for Parvati, Lavender, and Grace, they were not listening to Sirius, nor Sirius to them. If he had been listening, he might have heard something worth hearing: he does have fan club, after all. A fan club with a male photographer as a member. Yes, Lavender had bullied Colin Creevy to not only supply the cameras, but also as many pornographic photos that he could take. Unfortunately (In Parvati and Lavender’s opinion, anyways - Grace and Colin were secretly very glad) he hadn’t gotten any yet - Sirius kept his pants on when there were lowly fifth years around.

So as Sirius muttered to himself about the idiocy of his seperated-at-birth brother, the girls bitched to each other about every stray thought one of them had. After all, no one liked what the other one was thinking.

“I should really just get out of’s not my problem.” Grace thought to everyone in The Three Broomsticks, slowly edging out of the seat she was in. “Not my problem, not my problem...I think I can...” She started to edge away, but Lavender cut in.

“Not so fast.” Lavender’s hand snaked across Grace’s wrist, and pulled her back into the table they were sharing. “You should stay with us instead.” Lavender told her firmly. “She’s not getting about to get away from Parvati that quickly, not without me.”

“I heard that!” Parvati shrieked, turning towards Lavender. “Perhaps this would be a good time to inform her that her boyfriend, Dean’s, cheating on her...with me.” Parvati opened her mouth to say it out loud to Lavender, but then she realized tat she already had. “Oops..” She told Lavender sweetly. “Take that.” She added in a nastier tone.

“Is she serious...oh I...” Lavender remembered that everything that she was saying was being relayed to Parvati and Grace, so she changed her tone. “What makes you think I didn’t already know? WHy else would I be going out with Sirius tomorrow?” She grinned towards the muttering black-haired heart throb, and smiled wickedly.

“In case she didn’t realize,” Grace bristled with anger. “He had his arms around ME these past few hours, thank you very much?” Lavender and Parvati didn’t like being reminded of that little fact, and they all turned on Grace, tempers rising higher than they already had bee.


Meanwhile, Hermione and Remus remembered a key piece of information and were attempting to keep their thoughts strictly G rated - and there was a lot of muttering, “Don’t think about it...don’t think about it.” It may not be the best solution, but it had gotten them back to Hogwarts, which also happened to be out of the spell’s range.

“Sorry about that.” Hermione blushed scarlet as she turned to Remus the second her “Don’t think”’s were no longer audible.

Remus was blushing just as much, so she decided to drop the subject.


That night, after everyone had safely arrived home from Hogsmeade with only minor damages, rumors were flying. Even the first and second years were wishing that they were just a little bit older, if only so that they could have gone to Hogsmeade with the upperclassmen. Although their older siblings told them otherwise (“It was horrible! Absolutely, positively, disasterous!” Cho Chang assured her little sister, who was also in Ravenclaw, when she had realized exactly where Sirius had been - and they had both heard every single thought of the other) they didn’t believe a word they said about it. Even if they did, they would have rather been there for themselves. That way there would be more drama for their innocent preteen selves, after all.

Not that the end of James’s little spell was any relief - almost everyone knew about the fact that the Marauder’s (Which they had already established was their name, no one had seemed to notice the fact that the infamous Marauders hadn’t roamed Hogwarts for almost thirty years) were planning a prank on all of Hogwarts - and no one knew what it was. Remus, Sirius, and James could be rather good at keeping secrets when they wanted too, and that was no relief for the rest of Hogwarts.

As to be expected, the Great Hall was buzzing during their Halloween Eve dinner, rumors flying from House Table to House Table, no one was spared the horror.

“I heard that Sirius has a spell that will turn the professor’s hair pink - and there isn’t a countercurse!” One little Hufflepuff told a neighboring third year, who shook her head agonizingly.

“That’s much too weak for them.” She lectured the idiotic child - why else would she be in Hufflepuff? “They’re obviously doing something much more, maybe I shouldn’t tell you. It might give it away.” The Hufflepuff in question was only saying such thing because they didn’t (No, really) actually know what the Marauders were planning, and hadn’t had proper time to think up a good rumor yet. She decided to just copy off one that a Slytherin had told her, just to make it easier on her side - she could always blame it on the Slytherins later, after all.

“No I’m not!” The other Hufflepuff argued back, pouting a little because she had also missed the Hogsmeade trip that day, thanks to her lowly rank as a second year.

“Are you sure?” Her neighboring Hufflepuff stalled, trying to remember how the Slytherin had phrased it. The little second year nodded eagerly, so she spilled all: “The Marauders are going to ‘turn off’ the magic to all the proffessors and Slytherins, so that we have total power over them!” She announced, grinning widely.

“No!” Gasped the second year again, her eyes widening in horror. Then added a perfectly innocent question, “Can they do that?”

“Of course they can.” Her neighboring Hufflepuff replied smugly, glad to have won the little girl’s admiration. Across from her, on the neighboring Ravenclaw table, a sixth year boy had heard what she had said, and eagerly passed it on to his ‘posse,’ proud of himself for gathering the information. “Those new kids, right?” He addressed them, calling them to attention by banging his fist loudly against the rock-solid rock cake on his plate. Finally, all Ravenclaw male sixth years were watching him. “They’re planning a huge prank tomorrow night -” He was then interrupted by a jeer from one of his fellow Ravenclaws.

“We all know that, idiot!” A rebelling sixth year protested, for he was too bookish to use ‘real’ cuss words.

“Yeah, but I know what they’re doing.” The former Ravenclaw glared at the other one. “They’re planning on snapping all of the Slytherins and Dumbledore’s wands.” He was only satisfied once her heard the collective gasp from all of his friends. “Yup.” He said, more to reassure himself than anything else.


After dinner that night Professor McGonagall posted a notice on the Gryffindors bulletin board, with more information about the relocating of the Gryffindor first through seventh years and the remodeling of the Gryffindor common rooms, which hadn’t happened since the sixteenth century, and was in great need of it.

Everyone crowded around it for quite a while, pushing, screaming, gasping, hexing, etc, until Hermione had the good sense to use a simple duplicating charm so that there was fifty neatly piled copies of the notice for everyone to read a bit less violently.

“Slytherins.” James and Harry said at precisely the same time, grinning ever most maddeningly. If that look, the one that they’re wearing right this moment, doesn’t scare you, then nothing ever will.

“Slytherins?” Questioned the remarkably short for his age Nathaniel Ryback nervously, quivering in his royal purple slippers. He pulled out his Hogwarts School Of Witchcraft and Wizardry: The Rules book again, looking for the fourteenth time for a reason why it wouldn’t be okay for them to do this to him, but it was useless. He already had the entire list memorized - a feat only him and Hermione Granger had ever done, in the entire history of Hogwarts - so there was no chance of finding anything any more than there was five minutes ago.

“Slytherins?” Ginny turned to her best friend, Jennifer Hathwing, with a rather nervous look on her face. Jenny, however, didn’t look quite so nervous at all as she jumped up and down, mouthing ‘Draco Malfoy,’ over and over, squealing every once and a while. Ginny, however, was thinking on a whole different level: Harry. He’d be there, too.

“Slytherins?” Neville questioned, biting his lip hard, clearly on poor Nathaniel Ryback’s side.

“There will be no compromising.” Professor McGonagall informed them, sweeping up from behind the assorted first through seventh year Gryffindors, who were all squished tightly in the common room, and surprising them all. “It’s time to go to bed.” She added a moment later, as no one had moved nor spoken.

“Your mama’s compromising.” Whispered a first year muggleborn without thinking, who had heard the term years ago from his muggle brother. McGonagall swiftly turned to the boy, eyes flashing.

Author's Note: Sorry that this is such a lame chapter, I was extremely un-inspired and much too lazy to bother to do anything else, plus there's the fact that I couldn't think of anything else to write, so this is pretty much a very filler-y chapters of boring-ness. On a brighter note, I've written almost almost forty thousand words (Okay, maybe more like 37721 words - but we must think positive here) on my NaNoWriMo novel, which I happen to be very proud of (Not vainly, of course :) considering it's only day twenty. Ten more long days to go... *sighs* Anyways, back on topic. I want to know what the prank is just as much as you,'s just not coming to me so it's extremely doubtful that I will have another extra chapter up before December 1st. Which is when I'll start writing it, not when I'll put it up. Unless I happen to be very inspired, which is pretty doubtful...sorry for all this rambling, but you may just be subject to a little bit more, if you don't mind. *winks*

I just wanted to tell you guys a little bit about my story (Which is called
Kill Me In A Coffee Shop I used to really like the name, but I don't know now...

Anyways! It's about this girl named Anastasia and she babysits this little girl named Juliana, and every day they go to this coffee shop named Lighthouse Cafe where Anastasia writes another story about a certain Princess Kiera, which mean's that my story's really kind of a double story, because you read bother Anastasia's & Kiera's story, and they're both about the same length. I also made this little graphic for the story, which is going to be my ending point for this dry rambling.

Update, as of 12/3
I MADE IT! I got to 50,070, and I DID IT! I'm so proud of myself, even if that does sound vain....I DID IT!

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