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I walked slowly into transfiguration, my stomach grumbling loudly. I shouldn’t have skipped breakfast. Honestly, public humiliation would have seemed a whole hell of a lot easier on a full stomach. Maybe I should have just popped down to the kitchens for a quick bite of cereal. Mum would kill me if she knew I was thinking such things. She has her whole stupid S.P.E.W. thing. It’s completely ridiculous. House elves like working for no pay. And they’re pretty damn good cooks. Mum isn’t though. I don’t know how dad can eat so much of her food. He must have an iron stomach or something. All I know is that I long to go back to Hogwarts and each good food again during the summers.

I paused outside the door to the classroom. Ahh, it shouldn’t have been this hard to open one door. I shook my hand in preparation. This was it. I strode confidently to the door and yanked it open. The buzz of talking students that I had heard a moment earlier completely dissipated and I felt my face flush bright red. Every eye in the room had turned to stare at me. I let the door close behind me and moved a few paces to the left. The room instantly resumed its usual clamor, as if they all had not been just talking about me. 

I sighed and leaned back against the wall, letting my bag fall to the ground at my feet. This was only my first class. Would it be like this all day? I’d never eat lunch, let alone make it to lunch if everyone kept this up. I might have to declare myself dead and take up residence with Myrtle.

The door creaked open again and this time the clack of heels on the stone floor accompanied the person into the room.

“Take your seats,” McGonagall barked, brushing past us scrambling students.

I quickly picked up my bag and glanced around the room. Lucy was sitting in the corner, doing her makeup. She looked up when she felt my eyes on her. A broad smile broke across her face and she patted the empty seat next to her as if I was some sort of dog.

I resisted the very strong urge to flip her the bird and strode confidently to the front of the room and took a seat next to Al. I knew that he usually sat with Ian, while I sat at the back with Reagan, but I figured that if everyone really was talking about me and Scorpius, he would be less violent.

“Hey Rosie,” he said, not surprised by the fact that I was sitting with him today.

“Hey Al,” I replied. 

“Sitting up here with me today?” he asked. I could tell by the strain in his voice that he was trying to keep his tone as conversational as possible.

“Yeah,” I replied nonchalantly. “I figured I’d see what it felt like to be a teacher’s pet for a day, you know…”

He chuckled and punched me playfully on the arm. “I see,” he grinned. “Well then, I think I’ll just be going. Reagan is looking mighty lonely back there…”

“No!” I said quickly, grabbing onto the sleeve of his robe.

“What’s wrong?” he asked innocently, cocking one eyebrow.

“Nothing,” I said, trying as hard as I could to stay normal, “I just don’t want to be up here all alone. What would people think of me?”

He winced at my last comment and I wished that my giant textbook wasn’t in my bag, so that I could have smacked myself in the face with it. So he had heard…

I felt a large hand clap me on the shoulder and I spun around expecting to see McGonagall, but was pleasantly surprised when I saw Ian standing behind me, looking bemused.

“Hey Rosie, I think you’re sitting in my seat,” he chuckled.

“Oh, hey Ian, I’m sorry – didn’t realize – yeah, I’m sorry. I’ll just go back and sit with Reagan,” I said quickly and stood up.

“No,” Al said, pushing me back down into my chair. “It’s fine. Ian, you can have my seat. I have to ask Reagan something anyway.”

“Okay…” Ian replied, looking bewildered.

He slid into the seat recently vacated by Al. I know I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again – the universe is really out to get me.

“So whatcha been up to?” Ian asked, turning to smile at me.

I felt guilt twist in my stomach and panic slice through me. Merlin, had I really agreed to go to Hogsmeade with him last night? Yeah, I think I had. And then I went and snogged Scorpius Malfoy. It’s official. My life was turning into a muggle soap opera.

“Not much,” I replied, my voice squeaking. Oh nothing. I was just out snogging a Slytherin after agreeing to go out with you.

“Silence!” McGonagall roared from the front, interrupting our conversation, much to my relief. The classroom went instantly quiet. “Thank you.”

She began her lecture and I felt my interest beginning to wane immediately. I felt my stomach grumble again and I sighed, putting my head in my hands and trying to think of anything but food, Malfoy, or Ian. This was proving increasingly impossible as I my stomach continued its grumbles for food and I could smell Ian’s musky cologne from where I sat.

I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned to look at Ian, who was staring steadily forward, seemingly listening to McGonagall’s lecture. I dared a glance behind me to see that the two Ravenclaw’s whose names I could never remember were also studiously taking notes. Puzzled I turned back around and saw for the first time a piece of parchment sitting innocently on the desk between Ian and me. I cautiously looked up at the blackboard where McGonagall had her back to us and then picked up the paper.

I glanced at Ian and for the first time I noticed how he kept running his fingers through his hair and how he was chewing his bottom lip. I saw his eyes dart to the side to look at me, and when he saw I was looking at him he pretended to go back to listening again.

My curiosity piqued I picked up the parchment and read the sentence that was scribbled in small neat writing at the top. ‘Is it true that you shagged Malfoy last night?’

My mouth dropped open in shock and I stared down at the words on the page. Is that what everyone was saying – that I’d shagged Malfoy? I picked up my quill and hastily scribbled ‘NO! Who told you that?’ I slid the paper back into the middle of the desk and watched out of the corner of my eye as he slid it the rest of the way over to his side of the table.

My hands were shaking I was so nervous. I gripped the edge of the table to stop them, but they continued anyway. For the first time I was glad I had not eaten breakfast this morning. It would have been all over the floor by now.

Before I knew it the parchment was back in the middle again and I was reaching out for it.

‘Well, everyone’s been talking about it. Apparently the two of you were going at it in the third floor corridor during prefect rounds and McGonagall caught you and is calling a meeting between your parents tonight.”

I wasn’t sure if I wanted to laugh or cry.

“That is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”

I pushed it back into the middle again and this time he didn’t bother to pretend like he was paying attention as he snatched up the paper and read my answer.  His face was inscrutable while he wrote and I could hear the blood pounding in my ears when he pushed it back to me.

“So you didn’t sleep with Malfoy then?”

“Nope. I’m completely virginal.”

I pushed it back to him without even thinking about what I had just said. It only occurred to me how naïve and lame that sounded when he slid it over to himself, and by that time I knew it was too late to get it back. Stupid, stupid, stupid! I slid down in my seat and let my long hair fall forward so that he could not see how red my face was getting.

I heard the whisper of the parchment slide along the desk and I tucked my hair behind my ears again and reached for it.

“That’s cute.”

I glared over at him and was unsurprised to see a smirk plastered across his face.

“Shove off.”

I crumpled the parchment up into a ball in my hand and with one last cautionary glance towards the still oblivious McGonagall chucked the ball at Ian’s head. I watched with satisfaction as it hit him in the ear and as he jumped slightly from the unexpected attack.  

It was his turn to glare at me, although I could see mirth dancing in his eyes and I stuck my tongue out at him. He smiled again and turned back towards our lesson. I couldn’t help the slight grin that played at the corner of my lips either.

I went back to daydreaming, but was promptly interrupted when I felt something warm brush against my knee. I brushed it off the first time, assuming that it was just my skirt, but then I felt it again, this time harder and more flesh-like than my skirt.

Oh my god.

Ian’s hand was on my knee! Ian was touching my knee!

I wasn’t really sure what I was supposed to do – I thought it might be a little awkward for me to hold his knee too – so I just let sat there, beaming like an idiot.  

I wasn’t quite sure how I made it until lunchtime. Hell, how I had lived through Herbology second hour was a complete mystery. It was obvious that when Ian had said that everyone was talking about me, he meant EVERYONE. A first year Hufflepuff that I had passed in the hallway had called me a slut. And that was not the worst of it. Oh no. I had discovered when I had walked into the bathroom between classes that someone had charmed the back of my robes to read “Property of SM”. Kids these days were so cruel.

This was exactly why I found myself sneaking down to the kitchens at lunch instead of joining my peers in the Great Hall. Public humiliation in small doses I could handle. But walking into the Great Hall alone right now was a suicide mission. And quite honestly, I liked living.

I came to the painting of the fruit basket and reached out a finger to tickle the giant green pear that sat in the middle. It giggled loudly and swung forward to show the bustling kitchen. I stepped inside and inhaled deeply, drinking in the smell of steak and kidney pie and pumpkin juice.

“Miss Rose!” a small, high pitched voice cried and I looked down to see Winky bustling towards me, her tiny arms laden with food and a big smile plastered across her face.

“Hey Winky,” I called. “How’re you?”

She came to a stop right at my feet. “I am good Miss Rose. Thank you for asking. Is there something I can help you with?”

“Oh, I am just looking for a little peace and quiet and some food,” I replied, looking down at her. “Do you need help with those dishes?”

“No, I am fine,” she answered quickly and with a snap of her fingers the plates disappeared. “You want food, yes. Here, Winky will get you food.”

She grabbed my hand and with surprising force for such an old, tiny elf towed me through the sea of bustling elves to a tiny table in the corner.

“Sit here, Miss Rose. Winky will be right back with food.”

I took my appointed seat while Winky ran off again. She was back moments later with a giant plate loaded with mashed potatoes, a slice of steak and kidney pie, cabbage, and two rolls.

“Here, Miss Rose. Enjoy.”

“Thank you, Winky!” I cried, picking up my fork and tucking into my food. It had never tasted as good. Winky disappeared back into the sea of House Elves and I sat and ate contentedly.

Suddenly the portrait creaked open again and I heard the sound of numerous familiar voices before my teammates stepped into the kitchen. I tried to sink lower into my seat while still shoveling food into my mouth. Maybe they wouldn’t see me.

“There you are, Rose!” Kat cried, pointing at me.


The team turned as one to look at where she was pointing, and I straightened up, blushing.

“Hey Rosie,” James said, making his way towards my table while the rest of the team followed in his wake.

“Hey guys,” I said weakly. “What’s up?”

“Oh nothing,” James answered when they reached me. He pulled out the other chair that sat opposite me and flopped down into it. “We were just wondering why you missed two meals.”

“Oh,” I replied, shifting uncomfortably in my seat. I grabbed my goblet of pumpkin juice and took a large gulp.

“Would that reason have anything to do with the fact that the entire school is talking about how you shagged Scorpius Malfoy last night?”

I tried to spit and swallow at the same time and managed to choke on my pumpkin juice. I spluttered and coughed and then turned to look up at James again. His hazel eyes were livid.

“I didn’t sleep with Malfoy,” I squeaked.

“Because that’s so convincing,” Reagan drawled sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

“I swear!” I cried angrily, slamming my goblet back down on the table with so much force that some sloshed out over the sides. 

“Rose, you know that dating during Quidditch season isn’t allowed. And dating a Slytherin? That’s disgusting Rose,” James said, as if he hadn’t heard what I’d just said.

“I’m not dating –“

“And if you continue this way, I might just have to kick you off of the team,” James continued over me, shaking his head as if he was disappointed or as if I had let him down in some way. “Rules are rules. No one else has had a problem following that –“

“Hold on a moment!” I yelled.

I could feel anger boiling up inside of me. This was all beginning to become too much. I could handle stupid first years calling me mean names. I handle having things charmed to my back. I could even handle the fact that my reputation had gone down the toilet faster than the way Mum’s plum pudding went through dad. But I could not handle my own teammates turning on me like this.

“Have you not been listening to me at all?” I screeched, glaring at the lot of them. “I didn’t shag Malfoy, alright? I’m not sleeping a Slytherin! I’m not! So don’t you dare come in here and talk to me like this! You can’t control who I shag or when I shag them. And even if I was shagging Malfoy, it is none of your business. You can’t just bully me about.”

By the time I finished my tirade I was panting. Every eye in the kitchen was locked on me. I took a deep swig of pumpkin juice and watched my teammates stunned faces. They all looked stunned.

“Rose,” Al said at last, “I’m sorry for what was said, but you have to understand, everyone’s been talking about it, and Lucy... well…”

“Save it,” I snarled, standing up from my seat. “Some friends you lot are if you believe that bollocks over me, one of your own.”

“Rose,” Ben said, placing his hand on my arm. I twisted away from him as a tear fell down my cheek.

“You know what?” I croaked as angry tears started falling fast, “I quit. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

I brushed past Ben and Al, who were closest to me and sprinted to the painting. I could hear their shouts to come back from behind me, but I didn’t stop. I pushed through the door and ran down the corridor. I wasn’t sure of where I was going yet, but I knew I just had to get away from there. Tears streamed down my cheeks and my side ached from my combined running and sobbing.

I catapulted around the corner and ran smack into someone.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I cried as I staggered slightly to the right and caught myself against the wall. I looked up to see Lucy’s friend Charlotte sitting on the ground, surrounded by her books from where she had fallen when I’d hit her.

She glared up at me and began assembling her things, I bent down to help, but the withering glare she shot me had me instantly recoiling. Charlotte straightened up and turned to look at me.

“Whore,” she hissed and brushed past me, purposely bumping into my shoulder.

I gaped after her, my mind blank of all thoughts or emotions except bewilderment. How had everything in my life gone so wrong so fast?

Fresh tears streamed down my cheeks and I slid down the wall. I buried my face in my knees and cried until my eyes were all dried up.

It just wasn’t fair. Why was it that everything I did turned around to bite me in the arse? Why could I never catch a break? 

Anger swept across me. Really, this time it wasn’t my fault. It was Scorpius’s fault for kissing me. I guess then it would also be Lucy’s and Charlotte’s fault for spreading it around the entire school.

Malfoy, Lucy, and Charlotte were so dead. It would be so satisfying to exact some well deserved revenge. They wouldn’t even see it coming. The idiots thrived off of the gossip and rumors that were ruining my life. Malfoy would just be seen as a hero that had gotten another girls “V-Card”. Lucy loved being the center of attention, and with such a juicy story to tell she was sure to have been popular today. And then there were my so-called friends who had believed such lies. They would have to suffer too.

I added it up. I would be committing nine murders today. Could I get away with it? Probably not. At least everyone would know that you don’t mess with Rose Weasley unless you wanted to end up like my nine victims.

They’d probably have to send Aurors to get me. The normal Magical Law Enforcement Squad would be too afraid of me. Poor Uncle Harry. He’d have to head the inquisition. It would be so humiliating for him – having to arrest his niece for the murder of his two sons, his niece, and their friends. And my mum, she would be devastated. She’s probably have to prosecute me in front of the Wizengamot. My dad would probably go mad and start abusing Hugo then, because I’ve been taken to Azkaban for the next million years and then Hugo would go and do something stupid.

I stopped there. The downward spiral was just too much. Maybe murdering everyone was a bit drastic. Besides, I probably wouldn’t have the nerve anyway. I could barely feed a flobberworm to Hagrid’s favorite Blast-Ended Skrewt without feeling guilty.

I sighed and stood up, all the joints in my body creaking. I ran my hand through my hair in a futile attempt to make something out of it and dried my eyes on the hem of my sweater. I started along the corridor slowly, my eyes never leaving the ground until I got to the staircase in the middle of the entrance hall. I trudged up two flights of stairs and then got off on the deserted second floor. I kept on walking, not making eye contact with anyone until I got to the deserted girls bathroom. I walked inside despite all the stories I’d heard about Myrtle and checked out my reflection in the mirror.

I looked horrible. My eyes were swollen and red and my hair stood out at odd angles. I turned on the faucet and splashed some cold water on my face. It stung my raw cheeks at first, but after a while it felt good against my hot skin. I smiled as I straightened my gold and scarlet striped tie. My smile turned into a chuckle, and before I knew it I was laughing hysterically.

What was wrong with me? None of this was funny. Maybe it was just the irony of it all. Maybe it was the fact that I’d finally hit rock bottom.

I glanced around the unused lavatory. It wasn’t that bad. It was rather large and was slightly dusty, but it had a rather homey feel to it. I took off my robe and spread it out on the tiles. Then I dropped my bag at the head of it and lay down, using my bag as a pillow. All in all, it wasn’t bad, almost comfortable even. Which was good, because if I had my say in it, I was never leaving this bathroom again.  


 A/N: Hi everyone! I'd just like to start this AN by saying thanks to all the awesome staff who has worked so hard to get this site up an running again! They've done such a great job and deserve a great big round of applause. 

On the topic of the crash, this story has lost about 50 reviews, which isn't alot compared to what some people lost, but all of them were really very special to me, and I miss them now. I contemplated deleting this story and starting over again, and I still might. I'm not going to beg for reviews, but it would be really nice if you guys went back and reviewed some of the chapters that lost everything. 

Thanks for reading everyone, and I hope you liked it! This officially concludes the longest author's note ever. Please review!

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