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The shadow of a woman could be seen walking swiftly down the streets, he over-coat pulled around her pale cheeks, to keep out the bitter wind that wiped around her. Lily had taken the night bus after the healers had told her that she was too emotional to use any other sort of transport, and might end up splinched in half if she tried to Apparate or in Egypt if she missed her fireplace through using the Floo Network.

Without noticing where her feet were taking her, she found herself at the front door to the large mansion; she looked around to see if there was any sign of a trespasser, but nothing moved in the darkness, only the twinkling sound of the fountain and the rustle of the trees could be heard.

She turned and opened the door, as she stepped inside, her shoes echoed loudly around the silent house. She pulled off her coat and let it drop soundlessly to the ground, while continuing to walk towards the stairs. She gripped the handrail as she took each step at a time, tears beginning to run faster down her face.

Oscar lay flat-out on the cool floor just at the top of the stairs, and at the sound of Lily’s footsteps, he opened his eyes and his tail began to wag with happiness. Lily smiled and gently picked the now full-grown cat up in her hands.

“Don’t worry. I’m here,” she whispered, stroking the cat’s head, who purred softly. Without taken off her clothes, Lily lay down onto the king-size bed, Oscar curled up beside her, she stared blurry-eyed into the darkness for a second, before she couldn’t hold it in any more and she let off a loud heart-retching howl. She gripped her hair in her two hands, and yelled into the air, cursing everybody who did her wrong and also cursing James for what he made her do.

“I fucking hate you James!” she screamed, her voice going hoarse, “I hate you! Why did you leave me! You bastard! I hate you and your egotistic head!” and she began to sob, “I-I hate you James,” she whispered, covering her face in her hands and crying... She was totally alone...

When Lily woke up she found that the sun was already high in the sky. She grabbed hold of her wand from the inside pocket, and gave it a small flick. The heavy-curtains closed over, shutting off the light of the sun, and she rolled over onto her stomach, not ever wanting to leave that bed...

Lily watched as the cool water fell from the tap and into the glass, her wedding ring on her finger glistened in the sun light. She had been by herself for five long and agonising days, with no sleep; anxiety attacks ten times a day and not one single shower, which resulted in her looking like she had been dragged through a rubbish kip- with greasy hair, dirty skin and a sick-looking tinge to her skin.

She turned off the tap, and turned around with the glass cupped in her hands.

Two knocks came from the front door, making Lily jump. She cautiously placed the glass onto the counter, not wanting to make her self known to the intruders, before walking around the table and peaking out to the front door. Two silhouettes were standing outside the front door. Lily slid onto her knees. She watched as the little head of Dotty walk towards.


The elf turned at the sound, and her eyes fell onto her master crouching behind the wall.

“What’s wrong Master Potter?” the elf squeaked. Lily shook her head, before whispering.

“Don’t answer it.”

The elf gently nodded her head before walking off muttering to her self.

The two husked and deep voices were coming from outside, and Lily watched as on bent over.

“Lily! Open the door! We know you’re in there!” screamed the voice of Sirius Black. Lily bit her bottom lip.

“Richard is worried about you.” Remus added.


A sudden urge came over her and without answering the door, she ran up the stairs to her bedroom.

She flung open the large wardrobe and without pausing to look at any of the clothing she started to pull them out and they scattered all over the bedroom floor. When all the clothes were littering the ground, she flicked her wand and levitated the bundle out into the hall and towards a window that looked out to the back of the house...

Lily stormed down the stairs, her heart racing with adrenaline while her ears were being filled with the shouts of Sirius and Lupin, but she continued her way to the back.
She pointed her wand at the clothing and muttered “Incedio” to sudden burst of flames shot out of her wand and towards the clothes, which caught fire.

Lily stood watching at the hungry flames slowly burnt away the fabrics, the grey smoke drifting upwards towards the sky.


She turned to see both Remus and Sirius come into view, there cheeks a rosy red from running. Lily gave them an evil smirk.

“What are you doing?” demanded Sirius with a low puff, holding his two sides with his hands.

“Doing something I should’ve done a long time ago!” Lily screamed, turning on her heel and heading back into the house.

As she turned on the kettle, she could hear the two men shout ‘Aqua Eructo’ in their attempts to put out the fire outside.

“Lily? Where’s Prongs?” Sirius asked walking in, his brow covered in sweat. Lily didn’t answer him, but held out the cup to him. He didn’t take it; instead he folds his arms across his chest.

“I want to know what the hell is going!!” he yelled. Lily placed his mug back down onto the counter and made her way over to the table.

“Lily?” Sirius asked sitting on the chair across the table from the shaggy looking woman, whose emerald green eyes met his. “Where’s James?” he asked slowly. The chair scrapping across the ground as Remus sat down.

“We haven’t seen either of you in almost a we-“

“He’s dead.” Lily stated flatly. She had no emotions left inside of her to show.

The silence that fell was deafening, but before either man could say anything, Lily continued to explain.

“I wrote a letter to him telling him I was moving with Richard. Well you know how James gets. He headed to Hogwarts where he bumped into a group of death eaters. He was hit with a curse, a piece of wood cracked his skull and dug into his brain. When he woke up in the hospital he didn’t know who I was, he didn’t know who Harry was, and knowing me- I hate to break promises, so I kept the promise we made while we were still in school. I had to put him out of his misery.”

Lily didn’t want to look up into their faces, she knew they would be filled with anger, hatred, despair, so she kept her eyes glued to the mug. The minutes that passed felt like days.

Sirius was the first to make a sound, by clearing his throat.

“Why didn’t you contact us?” Remus asked.

Lily shrugged her skinny shoulder “I didn’t want the hassle. I knew if you two knew you would try and persuade me not to do it. But I had to do it... I loved him too much not to.”
“Didn’t want the hassle?” Sirius asked, and for the first time ever his tone was bitter, making Lily look up at him, startled. “Oh don’t mind us, Lily!” he continued his eyes boring into hers; he abruptly stood up from the table “We’re fine not being told when our best mate is dead! When my brother is no longer more!” he yelled, his face turning a rich shade of red. With one clean sweep of his hand he sent the cup he was drinking from flying pass Lily and colliding with the wall, where it shattered into a million pieces. Lily looked up at him, a small part of her terrified at what he was going to do next. She could see the features of his face soften slightly but before she could know for sure, he turned on his heel and stormed out of the room, the front door banging as he left.

Lily and Remus sat in silence for a while.

“You can also leave me if you want.” She said sadly, Remus looked at her, his eyes etched with sadness.

“I was never the one to turn my back against my mates.” He said, taking Lily’s hand in his. Lily smiled.

“I’m sure he was happy...He had you by his bedside.” Lupin said, with a sad smile.
Lily smiled back, but no tears came into her eyes.

“I didn’t want him to go. But I had to.” She whispered and Remus nodded.

“I know.” He whispered, standing up and kissing Lily on the forehead.

“You were his world.” he whispered into her ear.

Lily sat at the table in the study, with a blank piece of parchment lying flat out in front of her. She didn’t feel like Lily anymore... She felt numb, unemotional, unattached to everything around her.

She picked up the quill, dipped it into the black ink and dangled the tip of it over the parchment for a second before she wrote. 'Lily’s List’, she smiled before with a couple of neat movements with her wrist she wrote the first two words....'Bellatrix Black'.

Lily Potter wanted revenge...

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