Search Home Read Write Forum Login Register
**Disclaimer** I don't own any of the characters, objects, places, dialog, ect. that are familiar to avid Harry Potter Fans.







I grew up in a family where good meant the nastiest and foulest.  I grew up to learn that Muggles were dirt and Mudbloods no better.  In other words I grew up in a family of dark wizards. 


In my family I was always given high expectations.  Learn the dark magic, sit up straight, brush your hair. Above all else, honor the family name and do nothing to tarnish it. 


No matter how hard I tried to please them I would always be second best.  When it came to practicing curses Bella would always succeed where I wouldn’t, Bella who would become the Dark Lord’s favorite.  But I learned enough.  I wasn’t stupid, however much talk there was about loyalty to your family I knew that one wrong move, one wrong choice and I would be on my own.  I had to know the Dark Arts as a means of survival, not just to satisfy my parents.  As they always said, “Learn the Dark Arts or have them be used against you.”


I felt as though I had no control of my life.  If I even thought of going out with anyone who wasn’t Slytherin, pure blood and rich, I would be disowned.  Muggle Studies was out of the question.  I grew up as if I were reading of a script.  I knew what was expected of me and I did it.  My parents knew some pretty dark magic.  Even at Hogwarts I was being watched, for Bella would report back to Father if I so much as looked at a Mudblood the wrong way, nicely that is.  They didn’t openly threaten me but I knew if did one thing to tarnish the family name I would be kicked out of the family, just like my sister Andromeda.  


To my family Anna was the worst there was.  Her first offence was becoming a Gryffindor, and it all cascaded down from there finally ending with marrying a Mudblood, the worst offence.  If anyone asked we were to pretend we weren’t related.  My parent had just enough heart to let her come home for holidays, but when she started dating Ted Tonks they forced her to find her own house.  We never spoke of her again. 


But I thought of her often.  I had always admired Anna, never openly of course.  Sometimes I wish I had stood up for myself and done what was right instead of what was easy, like Anna did.  I envied Anna for having the nerve and bravery to do as she wished, to marry who she truly loved despite the fact that he was a Mudblood and it would lead to her banishment from the family tree.  She was brave enough to be against the Dark Arts.  I knew the Dark Arts were wrong whatever my parent’s said to the contrary, but she unlike me did something about it.  I was not brave or noble or bold or any of it.  I suppose that’s a good thing or I would have been put in Gryffindor and I would’ve been on the same road as Anna.  At the time I thought that was a bad road but now not I’m not so sure. 


I wasn’t even allowed to marry who I wanted.  It wasn’t called an arranged marriage, but it was as good as.  I never loved Lucius Malfoy and he knew it.  Being the good little girl that I was, I acted polite and courteous.  "You are lucky to marry Lucius," I was told when I showed less that eagerness toward him.  And I believed them.  My parents owed his parents a favor and as we were both pure blood and there were few other choices.  Our families would have dinner together then leave us alone in a fancy sitting room at the Malfoy Manor.  I was told how lucky I was to marry a rich, respectable, pure blood and how I should be happy.   I was passive enough to believe them.


Bella married Rodolphus Lestrange.  It was her own choice.  My parents were so proud of dear Bellatrix, for finding such a wonderful pure blood husband.  He was strong, handsome and had all the right connections.  Bella’s life goal was to be close to the Dark Lord, and he was merely a tool to get near him.  They worked well together but there was always something missing.  I could see it in her eyes.  The one thing I learned from my Dark Arts lessons that was actually of worth was; “It’s all in the eyes.”  I could tell that there was no love in the eyes of my sister. There was never that sparkle in her eyes when she looked at him.  She didn’t look at him like Anna looked a Ted.  But he was head over heels in love with her and so it all worked out.  I think Rodolphus was a bit too concerned with the physical aspect of their relationship to notice Bella’s lack of affection. 


Bella never wanted love and she never got it.  Anna wanted love, fought for it, and got it.  It seemed so simple for them.  I wanted love but I wasn’t strong enough to fight for it, so I never got it.

 Lucius and I ended up together, destined to be married.  Who was I to complain?  We got along alright as long as we both followed the unspoken rules.  I stayed out of the way and did as I was told.  He never went too far and provided the best.  All was well.  I think Lucius, like Bella, was too focused on the Dark Arts to spare time for love.  Bella was meant to marry Lucius, but she was too independent and he was too controlling, so he got me instead.









It seemed as though my fate was sealed since the day I was born.  This life I have led, already laid out for me.  Maybe I could have changed it if I had more bravery more cunning or less loyalty to my family.  Despite the way I was treated I always felt an immense loyalty to my family.  My family was my life and it was my duty to honor their wishes.  They made it clear that I had two choices the Dark Path or Death.  If I was against the Dark Lord I was against my family and as good as dead.  Still, I realize now that I had a choice and I chose the Dark Path. 


That second path that held no Dark Arts, my parents assured me would end in death.  “Learn the Dark Arts or have them be used against you.”  I didn’t see the second path as an option when it came my time to choose.  Even as it became clearer when I saw Anna take that road, I wasn’t strong enough to take it.  For along that path I could see many challenges and burdens that I knew I couldn’t withstand.


Little did I know that although my family made the first path look easy it too would be a difficult one full of loses and suffering.


For Bella the choice was obvious and she was eager to take it.  I suppose for Anna the choice was a little harder.  She was happy with the choice she made, but it must have been difficult.  For me I always thought the choice was made for me, but it wasn’t.  I always had the option of following Anna, but I chose to take the easy path.  I was never truly happy following my eldest sister but that was the choice I had made, and I was told there was no turning back.















AN: I hope you liked it, please review! 

Track This Story: Feed


Write a Review

out of 10

JOIN HARRY POTTER FANFICTION


Get access to every new feature the moment it comes out.

Register Today!