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Disclaimer: Yeah you may have noticed that the way I write the characters is NOTHING like what they are in the books, so NO I don’t own them.  I just play with their situations.

 

Author’s Note:  I know I said that the next chapter would be up last Friday, but things got in the way.  But this is most definitely an update and a definite improvement over the months it took to get you the last chapter.  Thank you for your reads, reviews, and adds.  I’m about to hit 2000 hits!!  *does a happy dance* I want this to end up being my most viewed story when I'm done.  Okay so I’m going to shut up now.  Go ahead and read and review.

 

Why Don’t You Kiss Her?

Chapter 5: The Walk

 

Draco,

      I have my own mind and when it comes to Ron it IS made up.  I said yes.  I love him and I want to be with him.  You can say what you want to say, but it comes with a price.  I already know you’re displeased, that you don’t think he deserves me, but that is MY choice to make.  So you can put up with him for me and have faith in my decision OR you can keep this up and lose me.  It’s your choice, but I’m not changing my mind about Ron just because you’ve decided to be a prat.

 

Hermione

 

Draco threw the letter into the fire.  So she was in love with Weasel.  This was something he had concluded some time before now, but he always assumed Weasel would keep screwing up.  It seemed to be what Weasel was best at.  After all, how many times had Hermione come to him depressed and/or crying because of something he’d done or said? 

 

He drew a shaky breath as he raked his hands through his hair.  How much was he willing to risk for his own selfishness?  That was really all it came down to.  If he were to hold fast to the attitude he had displayed when she’d told him everything, then he would lose her.  Was he willing to take that risk?

 

He shook his head and laughed.  No, he wasn’t.  Other than his mother, Hermione was the most important person in his life.  He had his dignity and he had his pride, but when it came to her…none of that took precedence.  There was a time when it would’ve, a time when how he looked had mattered more than anything else, but that time had passed.  He knew what he’d had to do.

 

He would have to support Hermione.  Did this mean that he liked the Weasel?  No.  Did this mean he’d be okay with their relationship?  Definitely not.  What it did mean was that Draco would keep his stupid mouth shut.  And maybe it wasn’t being completely honest, but Hermione knew how he felt about it already.  And that was all he could do.

 

Laughing in disbelief, he realized something.  The great Draco Malfoy, cocky arrogant bastard that he was…whipped.

 

-5-

 

Hermione,

     I never meant for you to leave and I know you’ve wanted this for a long time so I hope you’re happy.  More than that, I hope he treats you right.  I miss you Mione.  Meet me on the train?

 

Draco

 

So they were done fighting.  Hermione fought the urge to jump in the air screaming for joy.  She was so relieved all this fighting nonsense was over.  As much as she hated to admit it, her threat to Draco about losing her if he didn’t support her were just empty words.  She was not in any way prepared to end her friendship with Draco under any circumstances.

 

As much as she hated to admit it at times she actually needed Draco.  Losing Draco would be like losing a part of herself.  He was her best friend in a way that Harry and Ron just couldn’t surpass.  She loved him too damn much to let him go…as a friend.  Right?

 

She was definitely confused, though she’d never admit it to herself, because for some strange reason she LIKED that Draco was angry about her being with Ron.  It gave her reason to believe that he was jealous.  And for some reason she liked that she made him jealous.

 

-5-

 

Hermione sat at the breakfast table looking through a catalogue with Ginny.  There was to be a Yule Ball this year and they were getting a head start on their dresses. 

 

“Hey!  Our Hogwarts letters came!” Harry said enthusiastically as he untied the letters from the owl’s leg and handed them out.  He loved Hogwarts.  It was more of a home to him than any other place on the face of the earth.

 

Ron groaned as he looked at his booklist, “They’re trying to kill us this year, aren’t they?”

 

Hermione peered over his shoulder and laughed, “Ron it’s N.E.W.T.S this year.”  She kissed his cheek and opened her own letter.  Suddenly she gasped, “Oh my goodness!”  Squealing she jumped around the kitchen.

 

Ron looked at her quizzically, “What’s the big deal Mione?  I know there are books on that list and all, but come on books aren’t that great.”

 

“Go Hermione!” Ginny said as she looked at the letter.  She got up and started doing a happy dance with her.

 

Harry looked at them in confusion before comprehension dawned on his face, “Did you get Head Girl Hermione?”

 

Hermione nodded before hugging him happily.  “I can’t believe it.  I mean I had hoped, but this is so amazing.” 

 

Ron hugged her tightly, “I knew you’d get it.  You have to be the top student in our year.”  He kissed her lightly, “I mean who else is that obsessed with their homework?”

 

Hermione hit him playfully.  “I’m going to go write my mother.”  She gave Ron a peck on the cheek and ran upstairs.  She wrote Draco a quick note letting him know what had happened before going to work on her mother’s letter.  She sighed, this was not something she wanted to face right now.  Though she loved her mother very much she didn’t want to write her or talk to her any more than necessary.  Every time she tried to talk to her mother she felt like crying.

 

She knew why they’d divorced and it just wasn’t because of her father’s infidelity…she knew her father didn’t like that she was a witch.  He’d never said anything to her face or in his letters, but whenever she would go home for holidays she’d always hear them fighting about Hogwarts in some form or another.  One time it was about how she’d never get a real job with her education, one time it was about the fact that they did not even know their own daughter, and the last one she remembered was about how a witch was not a normal thing for a person to be and maybe they should take her somewhere to take care of her abnormality.  That last one she’d heard on the trip she took to Italy with her parents after fourth year and ever since then she’d spent summers at the Weasleys.  This summer she’d decided she had to be there for her mom, but the more time she spent with her mom, the more she felt like it was all her fault, like she was what drove her parents apart.  Her mom had fought so hard against her dad’s prejudice towards what she was and she couldn’t help but wonder if her mother regretted it, that if her mother too thought that things would have been so much better if she hadn’t been ‘abnormal.’

 

She choked on a sob and buried her face in a pillow.  Parents were supposed to love their children.  They weren’t supposed to resent them and insult them for things that were beyond their control.  She had not heard from her father since they’d informed her of their divorce and she had begun to suspect that she probably never would again. 

 

-5-

 

Draco opened his Hogwarts letter without enthusiasm.  While Hogwarts was fun and all he really didn’t want to deal with the incensed Slytherins.  A lot of the Slytherin parents were in jail and he knew they would either be kinder because of it or absolute horrors.  Draco was more inclined to think they would be absolute horrors.  Going back to school also meant that he would have to be an ass to Hermione and he hated that.

 

His eyes quickly glanced over the paper.  Nothing seemed that important…that is until his eyes glanced across the words ‘Head Boy.’  His eyes widened in shock and he jumped into the air with a WHOOP!!  This was great!  He wouldn’t have to live with the insufferable Slytherins…or room with Crabbe and Goyle.  This just kept getting better and better.

 

Narcissa entered the room in the middle of Draco’s celebrating.  She raised an amused eyebrow, “What are we celebrating?”

 

Draco turned beet red as he turned to face his mother.  He smoothed his clothes and coughed, “I got Head Boy.”

 

His mother clapped her hands and smiled, “That’s wonderful dear.”  She moved towards him and enveloped him in a hug.  He stiffened for a moment because this was something new they’d started doing.  Lucius had never approved of affection.  But Lucius wasn’t there anymore was he?  Draco relaxed into his mother’s embrace and hugged her back.  “Do you want to celebrate?  I’m not opposed to having Blaise and Hermione over.”

 

Draco sobered at the mentioned of Hermione, “I don’t think Mione would come, but Blaise might.”  He banished all thoughts of Hermione from his head and looked out the window, “I think I’ll owl him immediately.  We can get our school supplies tomorrow as well.  We do only have one week until we return.”

 

Narcissa nodded, “I’m going to Amelia’s for dinner.  She and Pansy haven’t been the same after the battle.  Armand certainly did a number on that family.”

 

Draco nodded.  There had been a time when he greatly resented Pansy because he was betrothed to her, but after the war, after they had talked and found out that they had been in very similar situations as children, they had become tentative friends.  It was nothing like him and Blaise and nowhere near what he and Hermione shared, but they were friends, “I should invite her too.”

 

“I’m sure she would enjoy that.  She has been very lonely.” Narcissa said, trying to hide her smile at her son’s thoughtfulness.  It was an old habit that she had yet to break.  She could sometimes let her son see that she was pleased with him and then there were other times when the need to be stoic was branded in her very veins.

 

“Well she won’t be tonight.”

 

-5-

 

They were dancing around his room, wine they had snagged from the cellar in hand, and music blaring in their ears.  It was pretty obvious that Blaise, Pansy, and Draco were having a good time.  After awhile they got tired of dancing and ended up sitting on his bed talking.  It started out pretty innocent, ‘what did you think of me when you first met me?’ and ‘who was your first kiss?’, but then Pansy asked the question that killed Draco, “Are you currently in love?”

 

“No.  I’m not sure if there’s a girl I wouldn’t get tired of.” Blaise answered honestly.  He had always been a ladies man and though he had morals (he would never sleep with someone he didn’t care about or cheat), a lot of the time he ended up getting tired after a period of anywhere from two weeks to four months.  It probably didn’t help matters that he was devastatingly handsome with his caramel skin, amber eyes, and short curly black hair.

 

“Well I know I have.  Still am actually, but he doesn’t notice me as anything more than a friend.  Even though I love him dearly, I don’t want to lose the friendship that we do have.  It’s just not a risk I’m willing to take alone.  Now if he’s willing to take that risk with me, that’s an entirely different story.” Pansy answered after taking a long drink out of the wine bottle.

 

“I don’t know.  I might be.” Draco answered vaguely. 

 

Blaise hit the back of his head, “You aren’t allowed to get away with that.  Pansy and I had to be all honest and shit so you’ve got to be all honest and shit.” Blaise drank some more wine, feeling pleasantly buzzed.

 

Pansy nodded and Draco groaned, falling back on his pillows, his hands rubbing his temples, “Yeah well maybe I don’t want to talk about it, maybe I’m in a rather pleasant state of denial.”

 

Pansy rolled her eyes, “Draco all three of us have every intention of getting sloshed tonight so chances are you won’t even remember,” she hit his shoulder, “now spill.”

 

Blaise stared at Draco with an expectant look on his face and Draco groaned again, “Fine.  She’s my best friend and the only people that honestly know about our friendship are she, my mother, and me.  She may have told other people, I’m not too clear on that one, but as far as I’m aware that’s who knows.” He took a shuddering breath and drank some more wine.  He was definitely going to need it, “Someone she’s had a crush on for years finally got the balls to ask her out.  The jackass finally realized what a prize she was.  When she told me that he kissed her I felt like killing him.  He’s treated her like shit for the past six years and then he gets an epiphany and she’s going to just let everything go?  I don’t understand it.  I’m jealous and I know it.  There’s just no other explanation for the way I’ve been acting.  In terms of loving her,” He thought for a moment, “I’m not really sure.  I mean I know I care about her more than I’ve ever cared about a girl before.  She touches me and I feel like I’ve run a marathon.  I’m all out of breath and exhilarated and all I’ve done is hug her or squeeze her hand.  And I can’t say anything to her about this.  She doesn’t feel the same way and I want her to have her happiness with this other guy, which she has made very clear she is going to do.  I can’t stop thinking about her and all I want to do is be around her.  She makes me feel like I’m the best I can be with her.  She’s indescribable.” He paused for a moment, a smile coming to his face as he thought about Hermione.  He turned to Pansy, “Does that mean I’m in love?”

 

Pansy sat there with her mouth hanging open, “You’ve been feeling all that for how long?”

 

“Since the end of last year when we danced in the rain.” Draco answered.

 

Blaise chuckled, “I must say that I am shocked.  I never thought the horny, womanizing Draco Malfoy would be in love.  I always thought you’d end up being some kind of player that never settled down and died a single, rich bachelor.”

 

Draco scowled at Blaise and pushed him off the bed, “Thanks.  That makes me think very highly of myself.”

 

“Well you have to admit that he’s right Draco.  You’ve really never had a girlfriend.  You’ve just had girls that you fucked around and amused yourself with.”  She laughed at the incredulous expression on his face, “It’s not your fault Draco.  You were kind of always taught to use what you needed and move on with no attachments.”

 

“When you say it like that it sounds like a bad thing.” Draco drawled as Blaise got back on the bed.

 

“That’s because it is.  I always thought something like this would end up biting you in the ass.” Blaise said as he laughed again.

 

“Something like what?”

 

“Come on Draco.” Pansy urged as she rolled her eyes, “You’ve never really had to want in terms of girls.  You’re hot.  And every girl you’ve ever wanted has been at your beck and call the minute she found out you were interested.  Now you’ve finally found a girl that you want and you can’t have her.”

 

“Fuck. Is not getting what you want usually this fun?” Draco asked sarcastically before he started drinking in earnest.

 

Blaise and Pansy fell on the floor laughing.

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