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Disclaimer: Don't own them, Don't even own the books (a sin, I know), but my mommy does.....which still leaves me with nothing....

Enjoy!





The air was filled with the freshness of spring; the air was a pure brisk quality that made the villagers smile in appreciation. Newly cut flowers were littered in all the small shops in a somewhat vain attempt to bring life into the dim lit rooms, due to its nature the sunshine preferred to stay outside where the plants seemed to compliment it more then the inanimate objects stuck on the inside.




Soaking in the blissfulness of the day Remus Lupin strolled down the brown cobble stone street, leisurely making his way to the quaint little café on the corner of Main and First St.




He was quite pleased with the weather; it was a simple pick-me-up that was doing wonders for his mood, which as of late had been dreadfully morose and cynical. Then again, it isn’t like the rest of the world wasn’t experiencing the same despair as him, after all times had only gone from bad to worse to the pits of hell.




Voldemort seemed more powerful than ever as more and more muggles and non-pure bloods were being ‘exterminated’. Remus shivered at his thoughts. Lately he couldn’t seem to think on much else. Neither could anyone else.




This genocide, which is what it really was, had been devastating the wizarding world for six long years now, and there was no end in sight. It had begun back in his sixth year at Hogwarts; consequently, it really hit home when Lilly and James were killed and Sirius was sent to Azkaban…Peter also went missing, but that didn’t seem so distressing, Remus just guessed he went into hiding as was his habit.




It had been one year and six days since the Potters had been murdered and the pain was still as potent as the night it happened.




Remus Lupin had had a hard life.




What was most concerning to him was that he was only twenty-three years of age. That still left about fifty years of solitude and guilt to eat away at his already weary soul. For you see, Remus hadn’t tried to make friends after The Event as he had titled it in his head.




Nor did he intend to.




Last time hadn’t turned out that swell and he didn’t think he could handle feeling like his soul was being shredded into a thousand tiny bits and set on fire. That feeling isn’t something one wants to experience. Ever. Much less twice.




Shaking his mind free of his morbid thoughts he instead tried to think on what kind of tea he was going to being ordereing. The café had an exquisite selection and it always was a bit tough to decide what sounded best. Either that or Remus was just indecisive, a rather distinct possibility.




“Lupin!” A soft voice yelled from behind him.




Stopping to look behind him Remus saw a vaguely familiar looking woman jogging slightly towards him. He had seen her face before, several times in fact, but despite that fact, he couldn’t quite place where he knew her from.




Grinning broadly the wavy-haired brunette stopped a foot or so away from his person, breathing slightly heavier than normal. Remus just stared at her, still trying to place her face, but failing miserably.




“Remus Lupin Right?” She questioned, although it sounded as if she was pretty confident she knew perfectly well it was Remus.




At his nod she giggled, amused.




“You don’t remember me do you? Ah, no matter, it’s been….what…about five, six years?” Her soft voice floated pleasantly to his ears.




“Hogwarts?” was his confused reply.




Nodding, her wavy hair bounced slightly as she grinned again taking his hand, causing a surprised look to pass over his confused face as he found himself being dragged to the café by a strange woman.




Well, this is different




He thought a little more amused then concerned. He was fairly sure he had gone to school with her, and even if she was sent here to kill him in the worst possible way he figured that he’d be able to fend her off with minimal effort.




She was rather tiny. Well, maybe tiny was the wrong word, she was only a couple inches or so shorter then he, but it seemed as though a strong wind would blow her away. Slight, yes, that was the word.




“Hope you don’t mind me kidnapping you for a cup of tea, I haven’t seen another Hogwarts student for about two years and I know we were nothing more then acquaintances at school, but still, you don’t know how happy I am to a familiar face. Oh by the way, I’m Lucy Devalle, I was in the same grade as you but in the Slytherin house, I kept a low profile at school so it isn’t surprising you don’t remember me.” Lucy said in a happy voice.




Remus smiled. He remembered now.




“Lucy? I always thought you preferred to go by Mittens.” He chuckled softly at her former nickname.




Lucy dropped his hand as they got in line for the counter her brown eyes smiling kindly as her lips settled into a soft smirk.




“I haven’t been called Mittens in forever.” She said sighing softly. “The last person to call me that was Mimi, and that was almost a year ago.”




“Mimi…Another girl in our year?” Remus questioned tilting his head trying to unbury his memories.




Smiling softly at his confusion she opened her mouth to reveal who Mimi was, but it appeared they had reached the counter.




“I’ll have the regular Chase, and he’ll have…..” Lucy said politely to the boy behind the counter before turning to Remus with a questioning look.




“English Tea and a Scone please.” Remus said as he went to pull out the money due only to have his actions spoiled by a small hand swatting his own.




“Put your money away Remus, I brought you here I’ll pay.” She said her eyes still looking happy but now noticeably more stubborn.




Sighing he complied, if memory served him right, Mittens (Lucy) had always been a little head strong, regardless of her ‘low profile’ she was known far and wide for being stubborn.




“Still as stubborn as ever?” He joked quietly as they gathered their orders and found a table in the small café.




It was strange.




 Normally Remus would have excused himself as soon as he had realized they had gone to school together-part of the not having your soul ripped apart again plan.




But there was something about her…she seemed genuinely happy, not just to see him but in general. It appeared as if the war/genocide hadn’t touched her at all.




It was selfish.




But Remus felt as though he could pretend the last four five years of his life hadn’t been hell because her smile was the same one he remembered her flashing everytime they passed in the halls at school.




It was like nothing bad had happened.




“Mimi was my younger sister. She was three years bellow us and in Ravenclaw.” Lucy said smiling fondly with a somewhat dreamy look in her eyes.




Was.




Past-tense, meaning no more. This little grammar arrangement did not slip pass Remus’s attention. Shooting her an apologetic look he quickly busied himself with his tea and scone.




Her soft voice brought his attention back to her face as she began speaking again.




“You know, you don’t have to look sorry. Mimi was the kind of person that would have yelled at someone for saying they’d miss her when she’s gone. She didn’t really believe in sadness, said there was not point to it really. Every body dies, and sometimes it’s not pleasant and sometimes it’s not right, but sometimes people die for exactly the right reasons.”




Remus just blinked.




“Really now.” He said slowly, as if doubting her.




Lucy just smiled and nodded.




She sure does smile a lot.  He thought somewhat annoyed but mostly curious.




Clearing his throat and figuring that after tea he probably wouldn’t see her again he decided to set politeness aside and satisfy his curiosity.




“So, what has you so happy in during such a bleak time?” He asked, twitching slightly at the bluntness of his question.




“Surely you’ve lost loved ones to Voldemort no doubt, how can you smile like nothing happened?” Okay, so maybe he was a little bitter, he couldn’t help it. Voldemort had more or less ruined his life and everyone he’d every cared about.




Sipping her tea she looked to be contemplating her response, smile gone for the first time that morning.




Looking up he was startled at the intensity that had entered her eyes, friendliness and happiness smothered out.




“Well, truth be told, all I have left of my old life is my smile. Voldemort’s done a number on my life that’s for sure. Since I was placed in Slytherin but nowhere close to being pureblood it had long ago been decided that I was a disgrace on the oh-so-impressive Slytherin name, and thus, according to my former class mates and he-who-must-not-be-named, I needed to be removed, and so did the rest of my family I suppose.”




She paused briefly, not glancing at him before continuing.




“After we graduated I married Lance Rallien, he was a hufflepuff a year ahead of us, and we had the most beautiful baby girl together. Ismene was my baby’s name. She had her daddy’s looks but she got my spirit.” She said grinning at the memory of her daughter.




“Mimi used to baby-sit for Lance and me. Those two were inseparable, it was so cute. That was how Mimi was killed though. She was baby-sitting at our house while Lance and I celebrated our three year anniversary. I guess the death-eaters thought we’d be home.”




“When we returned home, smiling and laughing we walked in to find Mimi and Ismene dead. It was a hellish nightmare. Lance couldn’t handle it, and to be honest I was close to losing it too. Anyway, three weeks later it would have been Ismene’s first birthday, and I guess it was just too much for Lance to handle. He had hung himself up in the nursery. When I came home from work I found him there.”




“It was like my nightmare was never ending.”




“To say the least I was in hysterics when the ministry officials had arrived. I think I scared them right good with my crying and wailing. But no matter, I think I went temporarily insane for a while there. I had no problem letting grief consume me; it was a weird, twisted comfort.”




“I really couldn’t understand how the people I had given my heart and soul to were laying cold, six feet in the ground. It didn’t make sense. I think what hurt the most was that no one else cared. I mean, yes, our family was devastated, but overall, the world didn’t care, after all so many others had had the same terrible thing happen to them, and my family was just three more casualties, three is a number, its impersonal, there’s no names or faces or memories in three.”




“Some lost four, some lost two. I found myself realizing that hundreds of other people had experienced this terrible feeling of losing everything, they had their hearts ripped out, and they had survived. What right did I have to act so selfishly? Technically I wasn’t the real victim; I still had my life, my health, and for the most part, my mind. Mimi, Ismene, and Lance only had the maggots crawling around their insides. As morbid as that is.”




“After all, I mean it’s not li—“Lucy’s voice faltered as if she just now realized that she had practically poured her heart and soul out to Remus.




Blushing embarrassed she smiled apologetically and turned her attention to her tea. It was suddenly very interesting.




Remus didn’t know what to say, or if there was anything to say.




“I’m sorry; you probably didn’t want to hear about my sob story.” She said quietly, sounding as if she truly regretted telling him, sounding guilty almost, like she had laid a burden on his shoulders.




And truthfully, Remus felt the weight of guilt on his shoulders. Sure he had had a tough life so far, watching your best friend’s life’s slip away because of another best friend’s betrayal is torturous, but he was pretty sure he would have ended his life if he lost a son or a daughter.




No one should have to bear that weight.




A slightly awkward silence settled over the two as Lucy felt suddenly self conscious to revealing so much about her self to an old acquaintance that hadn’t ever remembered her all that well. Meanwhile Remus still wasn’t quite sure how to react.




Sighing irritably Lucy decided she couldn’t possibly make a bigger fool of herself, besides it felt good to talk about it.




“It’s tough being a survivor, huh?” She asked only slightly rhetorical.




Remus nodded, smiling a smile he hadn’t used since Lilly and James’s deaths. Lucy smiled back quite brilliantly.




It was in that little café in the company of Lucy, a girl he hardly knew, that the world seemed to make perfect sense to Remus Lupin.




Yes, life was tough, it was down right hellish at times, but life was something not everyone had. Being a survivor is both a blessing and a curse.




On one hand you feel left behind, all alone, the only one to be tortured by the past and the ghosts that haunt it.




But on the other hand, being a survivor means you have a future. You still have a chance to make the world a better place, and if the world is too big, there’s still the chance that you can make someone else’s world a better place.




Even if all you do is give them a smile, after all it is rumored that they can light up rooms; surely the same applies to the world as well.






A/N: So what do you guys think? It's my first fic so be as cruel as you want, nothing's better then a dose of reality. Cheers!

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