“You will tell him won't you?” I asked for the hundredth time when Sirius and I were sitting at the window ledge of Astronomy tower on our ‘date’. We couldn’t go on a proper date without James knowing about us. We both felt really guilty about that…
“Yes I will…” said Sirius assuring me for the hundredth time.
“When?” I pestered.
“After this…” and he leaned in to kiss me. For the next few moments I forgot everything. After we pulled apart I let go of the subject. There were better things to do on a date. But I couldn’t help feeling that the more we put it off the more problem it would become.
Sirius and I entered the common room that evening, a little late, hoping that James wouldn’t notice anything amiss.
“Hey guys!” called Remus. I could almost hit him. I was planning on sneaking up to the dorm and then pretend I was there all the time. Stupid Remus. He has been a big pain all this time.
“Hey Moony!” called Sirius and went to join them as if everything was normal. I could learn a thing or two from this guy. I always get a little cold feet because I am bad at lying. I waved awkwardly to Lily and Kia as I went to join them. Lily raised an eyebrow teasingly at me and turned to continue her chat with James. Kia on the other hand was less jovial. She just pushed her glasses up on her nose and gave me a look. I knew what she was thinking. I should tell James. That girl can be a pain sometimes. But only because she is right.
“Where were you Juliet?” asked James as I sat next to Lily.
“I was… uh – I was…” I was, all right. I will be in the past if he knew what I had been up to. how long would it take for me to say ‘I was just having a hot snog with your best mate who also happens to like me’? But no. Why would I say that? If I wanted to die and get Sirius killed, maybe then I would say that. But as of now I just stammered.
“We both went down to the kitchen because we were hungry.” completed Sirius. He just keeps giving me more reasons why I snog him. I don’t think I want to do this. I have been doing this, I mean snaking around, for one week and its not really fun. I feel guilty. Its not fair to James. It really isn’t. suddenly I was feeling so rotten that I had to retire to bed. They were all worried about me. but I think Kia and Remus guessed it. when James looked so concerned I was feeling even more bad. I don’t care. I wasn’t going to snog Sirius until he tells James.
“Hi Ju!” whispered Sirius as he came near me. we were all headed off to breakfast and Sirius had lagged behind to fall in step with me.
“Hey…” I muttered, totally not in the mood. I wanted Sirius to tell James. Period. Don’t ask me why I won’t tell him. Because I didn’t start it. Maybe its because I am scared of James. But whatever.
“What happened?” he asked.
“Did you tell him?”
“No…” he said looking away. At least he had the grace to look ashamed.
“I won't talk to you till you tell him!” I said.
“That’s insane!” said Sirius laughing like I was joking.
“Maybe that, but its true!” I said walking away and seating myself in between Lily and Remus. Sirius frowned at me and sat next to James. I looked at him significantly. He nodded.
“James… mate… I need to tell you something…” started Sirius. Finally, I thought. I tried to look as if I wasn’t interested as I bent my head down to eat. “Well… I had to tell you that there … is a certain… a certain girl… and I – uh – really… ummm, like her… and I …”
“Wanted my advice on it?” completed James grinning.
“Something like that…” said Sirius smiling weakly.
“Who is this girl who makes the Sirius Black stutter?” asked James.
“Yea that was the whole point… the girl is – uh… listen James… don’t get angry with me… but its-”
“Its lily isn’t it?” completed James again frowning, “that’s why you are hesitating so much!”
“N-No!” said Sirius, alarmed.
“Well it can’t be anyone else! I would be angry if you fell in love with two people. One is Lily and the other is my sister and it’s a hard chance you have fallen for my sister!” Sirius gulped. I seriously felt sorry for him.
“Well yea…” he started, throwing me a nervous look, “I …”
“Was just messing around with you!” I completed turning to James and laughing. Ok I cracked. But I did feel sorry for Sirius! He was looking so cute and all and I am… well I am just a girl! “Come on James! Cant you take a joke?” I continued hurriedly, “Sirius just wanted to see your reaction if he told you he fell in love! And a fat chance that is going to happen!” James looked suspiciously at me and I bit my lip. He then started to laugh and I let out the breath I was holding. Phew! That was close! Sirius and I exchanged a nervous look and heaved a sigh of relief as we left for our classes. James and Lily walked ahead of us talking to Peter. Remus and Kia were behind Sirius and me.
“What did you do?” whispered Sirius when he saw that no one paid any attention to us.
“Sorry!” I shrugged sheepishly, “I guess I was too concerned about you…”
“Yea and now I don’t think I am ever going to get the courage to say it to him!”
“Maybe we don’t have to!” I said.
“What do you mean?”
“Maybe we don’t have to tell him at all! Maybe we will just keep it a secret forever!”
“And maybe, just maybe, that’s insane!” said Kia from behind.
“You eavesdropper!” I said accusingly, turning to her, “you just have this habit of listening in don’t you?”
“Well…” she started grinning guiltily, “you know you will be better off telling James!”
“Telling me what?” and James appeared behind me. Sirius and I glared at Kia who looked back at us defiantly. “Telling me what?” he repeated. Sirius turned and gave Lily a pleading look and Lily bit her lip, not knowing what to do. Everybody was looking guiltily at each other and James was staring between all of us with a frown.
“Ok I know there is something going on and I want to know it right now!”
I was in big trouble.
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