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Chapter 3
James who?

I must have looked horrible because when Remus sat down, he instantly asked, “What’s wrong?”

I uncurled myself, let go of my ankles, put my feet on the floor, and sat up strait into my usual position, as I tore my eyes away from the window. I was doing so good to not cry, but I wanted to more than anything. No. Almost anything. I wanted James first, and then there would be no need for the tars to com. Slowly, I inhaled and said, “Nothing.” Remus smiled in that way that told me he knew that something was up. Then it hit him, ‘Lily just lied!’ that was new! I guess being with James did that. “Ok,” I said, but I didn’t really want to say anything after that. “It’s just, someone that I met over the holidays. I’m never going to see tem again.”

Remus didn’t understand. This ‘person’ lived in another part of England and I didn’t know when they were moving or to what part of London they were moving to. All of my ways to contact James were gone. I actually, loved him, and yet, I can no longer see him. It is so like me to go for the muggles. You know, as I keep thinking about me and James, our love seems kind of, forbidden. We really like each other, but something is holding us back. It is a lot like a muggle play called ‘Romeo and Juliet,’ except, our parents done even know! Hehe.

Soon we felt the train start to slow down. We decided to go and get changed. Most everyone already had. When Remus returned, he found Peter. Eh. I am always uneasy around Peter, but I don’t now why. There is just something about him. Last year, Professor McGonagall asked Remus to tutor him, and some how found a way to befriend him. Remus said that he felt bad for him. I, on the other hand, don’t trust him at all. I stayed silent until we reached the castle.

It felt good to be back at the castle again. It was my escape. Escape from Petunia, my parents, and the whole muggle world. The only bad pat was Snape. He was worse than peter. Sevorous made my skin crawl. He somehow got it in his head that he liked me. He has been trying to lad a move on me since last year! He really needs to get it through his greasy hair that A: he is weird, B: Disgusting, C: really needs to take a twenty hour shower and actually use soap and shampoo, and D: that I will never beyond EVER go out with him. What girl would ever find that attractive?

Peter, Remus and I filed into one of the carriages. Remus and I sat across from Peter. I looked out the window to find of all people to be looking for a carriage, Sirius Black coming our way. I groaned right before he limbed in, asking to ride since the rest were full and he didn’t want to wait. I swear! Sometimes he can be a bit too full of himself! Peter moved over as my eyes rolled. The carriage took us to the doors of the castle, where Sirius left and Peter fallowed Remus and I like a lost puppy until we sat down at the Gryffindor table.

Professor Dippet welcomed us and then dismissed professor McGonagall to get the first years. About five minutes later, a out one hundred freighted first years fallowed Professor McGonagall through the great hall. They were sorted and then Professor Dippet went over the rules for the first years and welcomed them as well before singing the Hogwarts song. Then, at long last, the food appeared. About an hour later, the food disappeared and desert came up. It all looked so good. Eventually it all disappeared and we were dismissed. I was so tiered.

When I got to my dorm, I didn’t change or anything. I just plopped onto my bed. After I stopped bouncing, I heard a very familiar voice say, “Hey lily!” I looked up to see my friend, Niki and smiled. “What was up with you? You stopped answering my owls!” She said and laughed as she plopped next to me. AS I sat up, she asked, “So? What’s up? What did you do over the holidays?”

I smiled before asking the tall brunette, “Can I go to sleep and tell you in the morning?” and I tried to wipe some of the sleep from my eyes.

Niki frowned, but then bushed her curls over he shoulder, her light green eyes looking tiered as well. “Ok, but I want a full –detailed summer update in the morning.” She said as she climbed into her won bed. I nodded and nestled under my own covers. No sooner had I closed my eyes, I was a sleep, in a world where James was right next to me.

It felt like only two minutes after I closed my eyes when Niki jumped on my bed, once again. I stretched and opened my eyes and wined, “It’s too early!”

Niki laughed. “How could it be too early? Everyone else is down stairs at breakfast!”

I shot up. “WHAT?” Niki nodded. Oh my gosh! How could I have slept in? I never sleep in! I am always awake and on time! I hurried to get changed and to do my hair! Not that it made a difference, I was still a wreck! Niki helped and we eventually made it down stairs at the end of breakfast.

When we were walking down to the great hall, Niki said, “so, what did you do over the holidays since you decided to stop answering my owls? The last I heard, you were going to the coast for a two week vacation, and I had owled to ask how it was, but you never answered!”

“I’m sorry. We went and I, met someone.” Niki’s eyes widened. “His name is James, and well, we had contact, but just recently, something happened. I no longer can find him.” I said as we kept walking.

“Well, if I had known that! Man! Lily, actually interested in someone? THE OPOCOLIPS IS COMING!!!!!” Niki yelled, and we both laughed. And we found our usual seats at the Gryffindor table. “But, if you can’t find him anymore, the best thing to do is just to move on.” I nodded. I knew that she was right, but I didn’t want to forget! “Hmm, well, I don’t know if you ever caught it, but I really think that you and Remus would make an adorable couple!” Niki said as she got some toast. I didn’t know where she was coming from. “I mean, everyone can tell that he is totally into you!”

“Oh stop!” I said. “You have to got to be kidding! Remus? He is only a friend! I would never dream of going out with him!”

Niki looked at me and said, “ok, you try to find your muggle, and I will focus on something easy.” I looked over, somewhat interested. “Sirius.”

My jaw dropped. Did she just say Sirius? Like, Sirius Black, Sirius?! “Good luck with that one! I have a bigger chance of fining James!” I said, shocked and slightly disgusted. Sirius is such a git! “What ever gave you such a stupid thought?”

Niki smiled innocently. “Um, well, you can’t deny how hot he is! The only way you couldn’t would be if you were blind!” She said. I had to give him his props, but he was still a royal git!

I tried not to think about everything that could go wrong if they hooked up. I mean, Sirius Black! He goes from girl to girl, snogging them until he gets board, and then moves on, leaving them heart broken! I just didn’t want Niki going through that too. I wanted to change the subject, so I said, “I hope that there won’t be any ‘slug-club’ meetings.”

Niki laughed. “I know! They are so boring!” we stayed on that subject until Remus joined us.

“I’ve had a horrid night.” Remus said as he sat down. I looked sat him, wanting to ask why. “I couldn’t sleep. I am just getting used to the beds again. That’s all.” I knew that the bed wasn’t his reason for lack of sleep. The beds at Hogwarts are so comfortable. If Remus wanted to keep the real reason to himself, I guess I should let him.

For the rest of breakfast, Niki, Remus, and I talked about our summer. Remus took a trip to America, and Niki visited her cousin in France. While they were talking, I couldn’t stop wondering why Remus looked so wasted and bat up. it didn’t’ make sense! A rough night of sleep couldn’t possibly leave cuts all over. I tried my hardest to pushy it to the back of my mind… Unsuccessful.

Classes were simple since it was the first day back. All we did was turn in our homework, and meet a new teacher for defense against the dark arts, Professor Williams. I have to say, he was cute. He had perfect teeth, sandy blond hair, tall and had the cutest face with chocolate eyes, and dimples! Can’t forget those! He just got out of learning to teach the subject. He was young, and this was his first job.

It was only the first day, and I already had to help Niki. Somehow, she had a tendency to get behind. Me? No. I am taking the usual History of magic, potions, defense against the dark arts, transfiguration, and charms, but I am also taking ancient runes, divination, Arithmancy, and muggle studies. Niki was never good at muggle math, and was practically celebrating when she found out that she could ditch it. She was also from a muggle family. She obveosly didn’t want to go back to math, but she was interested in divination, so I took that with her, and she will take ancient Runes with me. Niki liked runes, but I thought that Divination was bogus, yet fun anyway.

As school went, I started to understand where Niki was coming from. I h ad never noticed how much Remus had been staring at me during class or how he acted around me. It was a different side of Remus that I had really never seen, even though it had been there for a while. James started being pushed to the back of my mind, and everyone else’s. I was actually starting to like Remus.

Days went by and he never said anything on the subject. I never really expected him to, but still. We would do homework together like we did on most nights, Sometimes Niki would join us, but leave soon after, giving me a smile as to be saying, ‘go on. Tonight is it!’ I smiled back, hopeful.

One night in December, things were about to change. Remus, Niki, and I were working on Divination. Niki had finished hers, so she left, and we did our smiles. Remus was still thinking about his dream for his dream log. He was thinking really hard before saying, “Well, there was a girl. I couldn’t make her out, except for her hair. It was red.” Remus was looking up at the ceiling while thinking this. “And she had the most beautiful smile.” I am not sure what she was doing, or what it meant, but that is all I can recall.” When he finally looked over to me, I was full out blushing! Then it clicked. The girl in the dream was me. Remus was totally shocked. Then he knew what it meant. He now understood. As soon as my blush had left my cheeks, Remus leaned over and kissed me. It was slow and passionate. I cold tell that he had wanted to do that for ages. When we broke apart, I smiled and blushed again. Then Remus said, “Um, well, I think I am done with Divination. How about you?” he said nervously.

I ruffled my papers and said, “Um, yeah. I think I’ll just, uh, head up for the night.” I smiled and took my thinks over to the landing, where Remus and I exchanged smiles one last time before saying goodnight.

When I got up to my bed, Niki was wide-awake, waiting. When she saw that I was beaming, she instantly squealed. I had to join her. When we were done with our girlish squeal, she asked, “So, how was it? How did he do it? Come on! You know I want the details!”

I laughed at her anxiousness before saying, “well, we were finishing our Divination, and he was explaining what he saw in his dream, and he was explaining, well, me.” Niki was trying to hold in laughter. “And, then, well, we kissed.” She nodded and we both let it out.

The next day was a bit awkward. Remus really wasn’t sure what to say. Well, neither of us did to tell you the truth. We kissed, and then, he got nervous, witch made me nervous, and we both left the scene, um, well, a bit confused. He was the one who kissed me, so I knew that he wanted to, but I was not so sure that he knew that I enjoyed it as well. I had to let him know, so at lunch I gave him a hug, and grabbed his hand. He blushed, but smiled as well. James was no longer stuck in my head. In fact, if you asked me who he was, I couldn’t tell you. He was forgotten. Now all I wanted was Remus.

A/N: A little twist on things huh! eeeheheheheheeee! please review.

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