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A/N: Well the AP Gov & Politics exams are DONE! Thank goodness. Anyways I just got done with a new one-shot called " Never Meant to be", just trying to get some new ideas out and I'm TERRIBLY sorry I didn’t update as soon as I could.

Disclaimer: Honestly…. would I write this if I owned anything?

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Chapter Three: A Bloody Dingy?!

The silent night was peacefully lulling Sydney and Lily in a trance of sleep….well actually no, scratch that, Sydney and Lily were walking worriedly into the entrance hall to get through the welcome feast without any detentions or points taken away.

"I'm sure Sirius wont tell anyone, I mean come on, how self-degrading is it to the male ego that he got punched by a girl?!"

Sydney forced a smile although she couldn’t help feel like something big was about to happen. Maybe it was her woman's intuition or just the fact that everyone was staring at her in awe.

They both took their seats after gazing around the entire hall. Candles were gracefully floating above their heads and the beautiful stars that night were shining down through the enchanted ceiling of their school.

Lily patted her shoulder in a supporting way as they looked around wondering if any of the professors had seen Sirius. He had stopped his nose from bleeding but it was extremely swollen so he made off with some story of getting into an intense fight with one of the Slytherins.

"He's so full of himself," Sydney snorted in amusement. But as soon as she saw professor Slughorn walking down from the head tables to the Gryffindor table, she automatically turned to Lily and widened her eyes in fear. Lily saw him and being one of his favorite students, she tried to distract him.

"Well hello Professor Slughorn! How was your summer vacation?! Good, I hope!" She tried to block Sydney out of his view as she chatted with him. Sydney tried to get up from the table and maybe leave the feast. Hell, she would skip the next week's dinners, just so she wouldn’t get a detention on her record, even if it was well-worth it.

"Actually Lily dear, I need to talk to your friend, Sydney Lane."

Sydney turned around hesitantly and there was her potions professor right before her. His thick blonde mustache and big build constantly reminded her of a walrus. She just shrugged and had to bear what he had to say.

"Miss Lane, I need to speak to you in my office before the feast…"

"Umm BUT the sorting! Yah…I have to see the sorting…."

"I'm sure you've seen it many times, seeing as it is your seventh and last year, I think seeing it six times is quite adequate."

"Right…well yah know I think the seventh time is a charm…no pun intended."

He eyed her suspiciously and led her to his office. She sighed unwillingly and followed the bulk of man towards his dingy, organized and candy-hidden room.

"Sydney, it's come to our attention that there was quite a commotion on the train today."

"Oh…really? What happened?"

"Don’t play coy with me Miss Lane. Sirius Black may be quite the smooth talker and a jokester but there is no need to break his nose…"

"But…but…" she realized there was nothing she could say now, so instead she closed her eyes and waited for her punishment.

"Love never ran the smooth course, Sydney."

Sydney opened one of her eyes and noticed that Professor Slughorn wasn’t looking at her but out his window at the drawn nightshade. The crescent moon was glowing into the office. Sydney wrinkled her forehead and looked up at the ceiling rethinking what he had said. Did he just say love? What in the world was he talking about? She hated Sirius…how could he say such a thing? Her nose wrinkled up and she almost chuckled in humor, what was Slughorn on?


"Sydney this is your last year, instead of letting the Marauders get to you and Lily, let it all in. You do realize that hate is the closest thing to love, right?"

She didn’t even hesitate to let a snort out. Was Slughorn a druggie?

"When you hate someone you think about them constantly no matter in what way and when you love them, they're always on your mind. It's quite a similar comparison."


She didn’t know what to say now. Wasn’t she supposed to be getting a lecture on not giving the entire school a peepshow of her nude self? Or something about not letting out her anger on an idiotic mentally challenged student, she grinned to herself as she thought of Sirius' face groaning in pain as she punched him.


Sydney gasped. Had Slughorn read her thoughts? Was he any good at occulmency? She tried to clear her head and just get on with the lecture.

"Well Miss Lane I've taken up a good amount of your time, it's off to the feast now."

She stood up in shock. He hadn’t given her any warnings, detentions or expulsions. Just as she was about to run off with a gleeful laugh, he stopped her at the door when he called out her name.

"Remember….love never ran the smooth course…."

She rolled her eyes and joined Lily in the entrance hall, leaving Professor Slughorn in his office staring out the window with a sorrowful glaze to his eyes.


"What happened?" Lily asked as she sat down next to her. Sydney was still gleaming her smile from ear to ear.

"I'm so glad Slughorn is a drunk."

"What?! You didn’t slip him a potion did you?"

"Lily! Sheesh, I punch Sirius and all of sudden I become a huge delinquent."

Lily shrugged and continued eating her dinner. Sydney had missed the sorting but the feast had just started, so she could still get a good dinner in. She grabbed a chicken leg and chomped away furiously, she hadn’t had the time to eat on the train, in between her nudity stunt and punching Sirius' lights out.

Suddenly a voice erupted through the entire feast.

"Oh baby baby….make me the happiest warlock alive….it's complicated and insane but I'll dive right in. Stir me up a love potion…even though it's already as vast as an ocean."

Everyone turned to see what was going on and sure enough there was one of the marauders walking down the hall with an awful singing voice rising from his throat. James Potter was walking with swag in his step and his intentions were towards Lily Evans. His awful rendition of " Your Spells and Charms" by Lucinda Wartyhag was reverberating throughout the hall.

Lily's eyes were literally popping out of her head as he walked toward her as he kept singing. She turned back around trying to ignore him but by now everyone was staring and laughing hilariously.

"Don’t push me away…your spells only keep me closer and baby, your charms wrap me around your finger, so I'll stay and linger."

"Is he still there?" Lily whispered to Sydney, who was clutching her sides in pain from all her laughing. Not getting an answer, she bit her lip and tried not to turn around and associate herself with him. Sydney looked over to see James gazing down at Lily with pleading eyes, seeming quite pleased with himself.

"Lily flower…just one date!"

"Please go away Potter…"

"Aw come on Evans."

"Seriously Potter…leave me alone. We may have head girl and boy duties together and a dratted common room but I swear to you, one more move on me and I'll….I'll…." She nudged Sydney at her side for help.

"She’ll chop off your bloody dingy."


Lily stared at Sydney in horror.


Sydney slapped her forehead in frustration. She heard a familiar annoying laughter from behind her and sure enough there was Sirius with a fixed nose.

"His dingy? Surely, you know what it's really called right, my darling Lane?"

"Black, shut up or do you want me to break your nose again?!"

Sirius shut his mouth but gave her an evil glare. Lily got up in anger and after Headmaster Albus Dumbledore's speech, she led the Gryffindors to their common room. Sirius kept kicking Sydney's heels as she walked with Lily, but when she would turn around he would pretend like some innocent five year old, she grumbled in annoyance but ignored him, not wanting another disturbing lecture from Slughorn.

She said goodnight to Lily who was silently cursing James who followed her like some loyal puppy to the head's common room. Sirius was busily flirting with the sixth years in the Gryffindor's common room to realize Sydney had done something quite humiliating for his ego. She had posted up a flyer on the bulletin board.


It's true, just recently a female on the train to Hogwarts had punched Sirius Black's lights out. He was out after the first hit. And afterwards he was crying like a baby calling for his mommy.
This news has just been given to the genius witch " Sadistic Mad Lunatic"
Be ready for more updates.

She thought it would be cool to have her initials in the name. Sirius was too much of a git to ever understand that her initials were the same as the Sadistic Mad Lunatic witch anyways.

Sydney grinned and headed up the stairs to her warm plush bed. When she had sneakily put it up, she charmed it to glow neon green, many had seen it and were laughing hysterically. Sirius eventually came by to see what the deal was and when he saw it, he turned bright red and flames almost shot out of his ears.

Heck they were almost even in their little game…but then again being nude in front of your fellow classmates does add up. Breaking a nose just doesn’t compare. Sydney had to deal with him for six years and she wasn’t going to take it anymore. Oh Sirius Black was going to get more where that came from….

A/N: Okay people TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!! I honestly tried to make this one longer….but anyways tell me if you hate it, love it, or absolutely think it's insanely (insert comment) haha…so I'll update soon.

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