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Chapter 10: All At Once

Lily woke up to find herself in a room she had never seen before. She looked around the room at the pale green walls and white furniture. “This is the most beautiful room I have ever seen,” she said to herself.

But then something at the side of her bed caught her eye. It was a person. She wasn’t entirely sure who it was as her vision was still slightly blurred. But the morning sunlight caught onto something on the persons face. Glasses. She then made out that the person had untidy black hair. Really untidy. “James,”

James had stayed in the chair beside Lily’s bed all night. He wanted to make sure she was ok. He hadn’t slept all night, but he wasn’t tired. He couldn’t sleep until he knew for certain that Lily was ok.

He looked again at her face, as he had been doing all night, to find her eyes were open and looking at him.

“James?” she asked weakly.

“Lily it’s ok, I’m here. You are safe,” he said trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to come when he saw she was awake.

“Where am I?” she asked in the same weak voice.

“Potter Manor,” he said. “We brought you here last night after….”

“After what? Why am I here? Shouldn’t I be at school?” she asked herself. But then the events of last night came back to her with full force. She could see everything as if it was happening all again; Voldemort pulling her by the hair, cursing her, James showing up, her parent’s bodies on the ground.

Then the realization finally hit her. “My parents are gone. They are dead. No they can’t be. They are fine. What was I thinking?” But then she remembered again the image of her parents lying on the floor, lifeless, and she knew it had really happened. It wasn’t a dream, no matter how much she wanted it to be.

(All at once - Whitney Houston)
‘All at once,
I finally took a moment,
And I’m realising that,
You’re not coming back,
And it finally hit me,
All at once.


James was watching Lily very closely. He saw the emotions on her face change from confusion, to realization, to horror, to sadness. It tore him apart to see this. “She knows,” was all he could think.

Then tears started to roll down Lily face as she finally accepted what happened. She tried to fight it, but she couldn’t. James got off the chair and sat on her bed, wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug. He wanted to cry himself but knew he had to stay strong. “For Lily,”


‘All at once,
I started counting teardrops,
And at least a million fell,
My eyes began to swell,
And all my dreams were shattered,
All at once.


Lily held onto James with all the strength she had. She buried her head in his chest and cried for hours. James sat on the bed with her and held her, rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head, telling everything was going to be ok.

Lily looked up at James and into his eyes for the first time that morning and saw so many emotions in them. Sadness, worry, grief, sorrow, misery, but most importantly, love. She saw the love burning in his eyes as he looked at her that she had never seen before but somehow she knew had always been there. She wanted to stare into them forever. She needed that. She needed to be loved. It was at that moment that she finally realised what she had been fighting for five years. She was in love with James Potter.

James looked down at Lily to see the horrible look of grief and sadness that was clouding them. But as he looked deeper into them he saw something different emerge. Love.

They both moved their heads until their lips finally met. There was a feeling of longing coming from both of them. This was something they both had been waiting for for a long time. It was a gently kiss but it contained every emotion in it. Everything they had both been feeling up until that moment was put into the kiss. When they finally broke apart James looked down at Lily again to see the love in her eyes was glowing above everything else.

“I love you Lily,” he said quietly, not breaking his gaze from her eyes.

“I love you too James,” she said in a much stronger voice than earlier, before reaching up and kissing him again, more passionately than before.

They both sat like this on the bed for a while, but neither knew how long. They were lost in each other. They both wanted to escape the hurt they were both feeling.

When they broke apart after what felt like hours, Lily laid her head on James’ chest again. James wrapped his arms around her again, hugging her into him. They sat like this for while before Lily spoke.

“James, please tell me it didn’t happen,” she said quietly.

James sighed sadly. “I am so sorry Lils, but I can’t. I really want to.”

Lily started to cry again softly. “It is all my fault. I forgot my wand and I had to go back and get it, so I hid them in a closet. But when I got back the Death Eaters where outside it and they…..and they….” She sobbed, but she couldn’t finish that sentence. She couldn’t say they were dead.

‘Ever since I met you,
You’re the only love I’ve known,
And I can’t forget you,
Those I must face it all alone.

‘All at once,
I’m drifting on a lonely sea,
Wishing you’d come back to me,
And that’s all that matters now,
All at once,
I’m drifting on a lonely sea,
Holding on to memories,
And it hurts me more than you know,
So much more than it shows,
All at once.


James turned her around to face him. “Lily, this is not your fault. You cannot blame yourself. You tried to protect them, and that was really brave. You have to believe that. You will never be able to move on if you keep blaming yourself. The only one to blame about this is Voldemort,” he told.

Lily looked into his eyes again. “James, I am so sorry,” she sobbed.

“Why Lily?” he asked worried, afraid she had done something.

“I am sorry I treated you so badly all these years. I was so horrible to you and you didn’t deserve that. And I don’t deserve you,” she said trying to pull away but he held on tight.

“Never say that Lily. If anything, I don’t deserve you. You are smart, caring, beautiful, sweet, kind and gentle. I know I acted like a jerk in the past and you have every right to be mad at me over that. But we have both grown up and all that matters now is that we are together. We need each other. I am never going to let you go Lily Evans. I have chased you for five years and now that I have you, you are never going to escape me again. I love you Lily and I always will. Nothing is going to change that,” he said and kissed her again with all the passion he was feeing.

Lily looked up and smiled for the first time that morning.

“I love you too James Potter,”

And with that they fell asleep, exactly as they were, wrapped in each other, each taking comfort from the other.


Slowly the door opened slightly and Sirius and Remus poked their heads in it, looking at their two friends.

“Well it looks like Operation Stag and Flower has succeeded,” said Sirius smiling at the sleeping couple.



A/N: Awwww! Well we all knew that it was coming! But it's still really sad! What did you think?? Please review and tell me! Thank you so much for reading! And extra thanks to everyone who reviewed! I really love reading what you all think! Thanks again! = )

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