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Chapter 10-Mrs. Logan Johnson

It’s official. I am now believed to be deeply infatuated with Logan Johnson. I’ve mentioned it lightly to Holly over the past week or so and I’ve upped it a notch as of late. I must say, I’m a stealth little thing. I seem to have a knack for this sort of business.

It’s almost as if I’m pranking the entire student body. Someday, when we’re all gathering at some class reunion and all of the flamboyant airheads are gathered near the bathroom, the arrogant prats by the bar, and the most-likely-Death-Eaters-by-this-point-in-time crowd are sending evil glares to nearly everyone in the room, I’m going to announce it to them all. I’m going to shatter their pride. I’m going to put a huge dent in any ideas they were given during this year of school.

“I never liked Logan Johnson. You were all just too gullible and stupid to believe otherwise. Ha. And let me say it again, ha!”

It’ll be beautiful. Absolutely delightful. Lily, the almighty master of spite.

Anyways, since I’ve sort of embraced the stalker in me, I’ve learned quite a bit about Logan Johnson, who I virtually knew nothing about before taking on this wondrous task. When I say nothing, I mean nothing. I knew his name and well, his house, but that’s about it. I’ve never spoken one word to him throughout my entire four years. Yes, I’ve learned loads…

Logan Johnson
My Beloved

-Logan is in every single one of my classes. Honestly can’t say I knew that before I started giving him a bit of extra attention. He’s even in Arithmancy with me. I didn’t even know any fourth year Gryffindors besides myself took Arithmancy. Well, now I know.

-Logan’s best friends are Frank Longbottom and Amos Diggory. Alas, I’ve been on friendly terms with both Frank and Amos for several years and I can’t say I knew that they were friends with Logan, let alone best friends.

-He’s the Keeper for the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Ah, yes, I feel kind of bad I didn’t know this. Whenever I referred to the Keeper, I sort of just pointed at him, opposed to figuring out his namesake.

-Apparently, he asks me to pass the pumpkin pasties during every meal. Normally, Holly has to pass them, but when I finally did pass them to him last night at dinner, both Holly and he went into states of complete shock. I’m hard of hearing, I tell you. It’s completely understandable that I hadn’t heard him during previous meals.

-He’s allergic to cats. Last week, in the common room, I asked him to watch Jules for a bit while I ran up to get a book. When I came back, he was covered in hives and begging me to take my cat back. Yes, I can see that this could be problematic…

I can tell already that he’s growing suspicious of my newfound appreciation for him and his well-bring. I dragged him to the nurse’s office, making sure that Bertha Jorkins and Rita Skeeter, two of the biggest gossips in the entire school, saw us.

Word does travel fast. And you know what? I’m starting to like the fact that nearly everyone at Hogwarts is nosy. I really am. The Snape rumors have officially stopped. I hereby declare this month, ‘Lily Evans Appreciation Month’. This institution could have done me no bigger favor than that.

I’m not entirely sure if Holly believes me about Logan though. She’s been eyeing me funny these past couple of weeks. She just doesn’t see me as the ‘crush’ type, I suppose. I’m a very convincing actress, if truth be told.

Well, right now I’m sitting in detention and I’m completely bored out of my skull. I’ve been doodling in you, you poor diary, for the last forty minutes. An entire two pages, two good and useful pages, might I add, have been wasted on scribbling Logan Johnson. See? I really am devoted to making those stupid prats pay. I am so slick that I’m even convincing unconsciously.

I did notice Potter glancing over a few times. He seems a bit disgruntled for some odd reason. Couldn’t possibly be because the berk likes me, could it? This’ll teach him for being stupid. Why the hell would he choose to like me? We loathe each other. He’s been nothing but mean to me for four entire years. And now, I’m going to give him a reality check. He needs to realize it’s never going to happen.

Wow, I really am wicked. And I’m completely loving it. Now, tell me this isn’t a GREAT touch; Mrs. Lily Johnson, Mrs. Logan Johnson, Auror Johnson, Lily Johnson.

I’m bloody brilliant. Now, I must explain something to you, diary. If I start babbling incessantly about how adorable Logan’s ears are or something equally revolting, you must forgive me. It most likely means prying eyes are gazing onto your pages. Potter’s really nosy, I tell you. Too nosy, if you catch my drift.

All of those Marauders are a bit too ‘involved’ with everyone in this school. I mean, people like Bertha Jorkins gained their reputations early on. Yet, Potter’s gang just never seemed the type. That is, until this year. I’m suspecting that perhaps, just maybe, James Potter is stalking me.

Oh, Lord, he just looked over! Damn, damn, damn. I think he saw that. His neck’s turned red. He did see that.


Ah, revenge is sweet. I just hope that was enough to throw him off of what I wrote before that. Probably not. Potter’s far too annoying and incessant to forget what I want him to.

Maybe if I sit here and concentrate real hard.

Forget, Potter. Forget, forget. What you just read was complete rubbish. I indeed don’t notice that you have your friends trail me like leeches. Don’t notice at all. Honestly. I think about you as little as possible. Even when you annoy me. Forget, you bloody ignoramus.


Wow, I’m sickening myself. I really am. I feel like I’m going to vomit a little. Perhaps that’s because Potter read that I think he’s stalking me. Ah, well, maybe he was just blushing because Snape accidentally brushed legs with him.

Please, Merlin, please! Let that be it! As disturbing as that image is, please let that be the reason!

Great, time to go. I absolutely hate walking back to the tower with him. My little legs can only carry me so fast though. I hate being short. Damn my mother for passing along the recessive genes!

Right now, I’m sitting in Transfiguration and have managed to sneakily (so stealth, baby) place you on my lap so that I may record all that happened last night. It was bizarre, let me tell you. This coming from a girl who owns a one-eyed cat. When I say bizarre, I mean bizarre.

So, as fast as my little legs could take me, I walked down the hall, James Potter following closely after me. Of course, seeing as he’s at least three inches taller, he caught up.

He had this odd expression on his face, somewhat put out. It was as if someone had stolen his broom. And a broom to Potter is like magic to Dumbledore. Can’t live without it.

“’Lo, Evans,” he said, almost miserably. And shockingly, I sort of felt sorry for him. Don’t ask me why. I hate the boy with every fiber in my entire body.

“Potter,” I replied politely. He eyed my diary, which has now been covered with Logan’s name. I swear it, when I get the chance, I’ll have you re-covered diary. For now though, you must endure this horrible torture.

“Been hearing lots of news about you lately,” he mentioned casually, his hands settling comfortably in his pockets.

“Suppose you have,” I retorted, laughing so hard on the inside. I know, I’m vicious.

“And also, surprisingly, Logan Johnson’s name has been one of the hot topics of this month,” he informed me.

“Spending time snogging Skeeter, have you, Potter?” I asked him sarcastically.

He swore under his breath. I only caught small parts such as, “Cow” and “Over my dead, decapitated body.”

“It’s just a strange thing, you know,” he told me. “I mean, Johnson’s never really been a conversation starter. I should know. We’re on the same Quidditch team. I don’t have a thing against the guy.”

“And I care, because…?” I asked, even though I knew why he was mentioning this. He was jealous. Don’t ask me why. As said, I don’t know what makes sense in Potter’s mind.

“From what I can see, you’re madly in love with the bloke,” he told me. “I would think you’d care.”

“Madly in love? That’s carrying it a bit far,” I insisted, smiling slightly at my own ploy.

“Whatever you say, Evans. It’s just curious, is all,” he told me, turning a bit too soon down a forking hallway. He must have been off to cause some sort of discomfort upon the school. “Seeing as you haven’t said a word to him before last month.”

And that’s where he left our conversation. It was hanging midair and he just left it. He’s an odd one, I tell you. Odd. At this point, I’m not too sure about what he’s feeling. Is he jealous? Or unconvinced? A bit of both?

“Lily, your so-called love interest is leaving,” Holly announced, interrupting my thoughts abruptly.

Great. Now I’m going to have to stampede the halls.

Off to swoon my test subject,

Lily Evans

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