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Sorry it has been so long since I've updated...I promise it won't happen again!! Thanks to all my reviewers.....You guys are great! Nothing is My Own Read and Review ************************************************** Chapter Twenty: Secrets in My Mind With the end of Christmas came the return to Hogwarts, and it was one time Harry was thankful for the return. Two weeks at Grimwald Place was enough, the memories were becoming harder and harder to bear. Their things were gathered and they were returning to Hogwarts that afternoon by floo. “I am so behind on my studies, I can’t wait to get back to the library,” Hermione muttered placing her trunk in front of the fireplace. “What are you going to do after Hogwarts? I mean you can’t study you whole life, can you?” Ron asked shaking his head. “Do you honestly think you’ll know everything when you leave Hogwarts Ron?” Hermione said rolling her eyes. “Lunch is ready, hurry up and eat or you’ll be late,” Mrs. Weasley called from the kitchen. Ginny pushed past Ron giving him an evil glare. “Still not talking to you?” Fred asked with a smile. Ron huffed, “what would you two have done if Percy would have shown up with you here?” “Not what you did mate, sorry but that was a bit stupid,” George teased. “We’d have given him one of our silencing caramels so he couldn’t open that big fat trap of his anymore,” Fred finished. Ron walked to the kitchen, “I don’t care he’s a stupid git, and I only wish I’d have been able to give him a bigger piece of my mind,” Ron said hatefully in response. The last week at Grimwald had been a Weasley battle. If there was one member of the redhead family that could hold a grudge longer than Ron, it was Ginny. Her temper was equal to the color of her flaming hair. Instead of the silent treatment which was Ron’s specialty, she had let him know what an insensitive prat he was whenever a situation presented itself. Also she had George and Fred’s malicious trickster trait, so she was literally make Ron’s vacation intolerable. “I’m just glad to be getting out of here, I can’t handle anymore of Ginny,” Ron said flatly to Harry as they ate their lunch. Hermione let out a sigh, “well you could apologize to your mother, she might lay off you a bit then.” “I didn’t do anything wrong, Percy is the one who betrayed our family and disowned us, and I’m the one being prosecuted!” Ron argued. “Well, there is no sense in arguing about this,” Hermione said casually. “Professor O’Riley asked me to restart my Occlemency lesson,” Harry said completely off subject, he had been waiting for the perfect opportunity to tell his friends, and the way thing had gone lately, that perfect time was never going to arrive. “What? When did you she ask you that?” Ron exclaimed. “Christmas, right before Percy showed up,” Harry said quietly. “Is Snape going to instruct you?” Hermione asked. “No, she’d be taking over my lesson,” Harry explained. Hermione shook her head, “you going to do it, right?” “I don’t know, I mean I still think the reason Voldemort was able to trick me was because Snape had weakened my mind. I mean I’m not having dreams anymore and my scar hasn’t hurt since that night at the ministry.” “Harry you’re being silly, Professor Snape didn’t weakened your mind intentionally, and you know we can trust Professor O’Riley,” Hermione pleaded. “I don’t see why I should go starting things up again,” Harry explained. “What does Dumbledore think?” Ron questioned shoving half a sandwich into his mouth. “It was his idea, I think.” “Are you guys coming, Professor O’Riley is waiting by the fireplace?” Ginny asked poking her head though the kitchen door. “We’re coming,” Harry said with a forced smile. Hermione grabbed Harry’s arm, “we’ll talk about this later?” He nodded. Harry hadn’t developed a liking of flooing over the holidays as the small dizzy sensation pulled him back into the Gryffindor common room. It was already fairly crowded with returned students. “Hey Harry, have a good Christmas?” Neville asked as a greeting. “Good, and your?” Harry returned. “Not to shabby, I got a new plant!” Neville said as a smile creped on his chubby face. “Hey Ron, Hermione, “ Neville said cheerful as the next two appeared. “Glad to be back?” Hermione asked. “Did you hear, Herbology, they’ve reinstated classes,” Neville informed them. Ron looked a Harry slightly worried, he was thinking about the dragon egg Hagrid wanted to hatch. “Still no Quidditch though, say it’s too dangerous,” Dennis Creevy added from across the room. “Harry got a strategic planning board,” Ron yelled back over toward Dennis. “Really, what’s that?” Dennis asked in his normal naïve muggle sense. Ron was about to explain, when someone beat him to the punch. “It’s a board that in enchanted to play out Quidditch scenarios magically. They’re very expensive and usually only professional teams have them,” Pavarti interrupted. Harry didn’t let his eyes lift to meet hers, suddenly feeling slightly guilty. “Who got you that?” Dennis finally asked. “Cho Chang,” Ron said with a smile. Harry reared on Ron with a cold look and an expression that said “big mouth.” Ron shrugged, “what?” “Cho Chang got you a strategic planning board?” Pavarti asked oddly. “I don’t know why?” Harry said innocently. “Mr. Potter?” Professor McGonagall called from the portrait opening, “your presence is requested, follow me please.” It was the first time that a Professor had requested him and he was truly grateful. He glanced at Pavarti right before he disappeared out of the common room, slightly surprised to see a glaze over her eyes. “There is a secret meeting of the Quidditch team captain, there is no sense in getting the rest of the student body all worked up since nothing is determined yet, you are to keep this to yourself,” Professor McGonagall instructed leading him down the corridors. “What is the meeting about Professor?” Harry asked attempting to keep up. She opened a door and motioned for him to enter. Professor Dumbledore and Madame Hooch were sitting at a table chatting excitedly. “ Welcome Harry, your fellow captains should be arriving shortly,” Professor Dumbledore said with a familiar sparkle in his eyes. “What’s going on Professor?” Harry questioned. “Patients, all will be revealed shortly,” the old Professor responded. It didn’t take long for all the captains to gather and the meeting took shape. “What are we doing here?” said Zacharias Smith, “I thought Quidditch was cancelled for the year.” “Indeed it is to late to start the typically Quidditch season,” Madame Hooch confessed. “So what is this meeting about, I’m a Seventh year so plans for next year are pointless,” Slytherin team captain Rosy Rodchester complained. “I agree,” Cho spoke up. “Madame Hooch and I believe that the Quidditch matches are a much needed distraction, and since it is too late in the year to continue our normal schedule we are thinking about altering it. Maybe a tournament of sorts, over a weekend. I know it is not traditional to play games so close together but we haven’t had a game last over a day in 35 years,” Dumbledore started. “But what if we do?” Rosy questioned. Dumbledore let out a slight chuckle, “I do believe we’ll deal with that situation if it arises.” “What about practices, we can’t freely go onto the grounds,” Cho argued. “Professor Flitwick and myself have charmed the grounds, so they are slightly more protected, but it is still unsafe for student to wander un-chaperoned,” Dumbledore continued. “meaning the teams will work on an extremely strict practice schedule, and your head of house will monitor all practices.” “So, we’ll be allowed outdoors?” Harry inquired. Dumbledore smiled, “yes Harry, one hour of practice once per week.” Cho looked over towards Harry with a blush, and Harry tried not to notice her eyes. “You’re dismissed, please keep this quiet among your teams, we don’t need everyone in the school aware of these plans,” Madame Hooch reminded. The captains muttered happily to themselves, “I can’t believe it, we’re going to get to play Quidditch,” Rosy muttered. “It’s going to be a tough weekend, three games?” Ernie added. “I don’t care as long as I get outside,” Rosy continued. Harry nodded his head in agreement, the only time he’d ever agree with a Slytherin. “Did you have a Happy Christmas,” Cho asked shyly. Harry suddenly felt something obvious go off in his head, she had given him a Christmas presents, and he hadn’t gotten her anything, infact he hadn‘t even written her a letter. “Thanks for the strategic board,” Harry offered, avoiding her eyes still. Cho lowered her head, “don’t mention it, I owed you one.” “No you didn’t. You’re the one that saved me from the Dementors,” Harry said, guilt creeping into his voice. “If you walk me back to the Ravenclaw common room, we’ll call it even,” she bartered. As they left the meeting together, Harry suddenly realized he didn’t even have the slightest inkling where the Ravenclaw common room might be. “Which way,” Harry asked dumbfounded when they reached the end of the corridor. Cho laughed lightly, “follow me.” “Did you have a good holiday?” Harry asked desperate to find an excuse for not getting her a gift. “My mother made me stay in bed most of the time, but I’m feeling a lot better now,” Cho confessed. She did look stronger, the swelling in her face was greatly reduced and her eyes didn’t seem a puffy. “You look better,” Harry said stupidly. “Not that you didn’t look good before.” Cho giggled turning slightly pink. “That didn’t come right,” he said feeling awkward. “I know what you meant,” she offered, “I don’t know how you do it. One encounter and I was bed ridden for months .” “I’ve never charged a Dementor before,” Harry corrected her. Cho stopped and bit her lip, “no but you’ve face him. Almost anyone else who faces him dies.” “I sometimes wish I was like everyone else, just to get it over with,” Harry muttered mostly to himself. “How can you say that. Your bravery is inspiring, the way you turned to face that Dementor, you aren’t afraid of anything,” Cho continued. Harry shook his head violently, “I’m afraid of everything. I’m afraid of losing everybody. I‘m afraid I‘m not going to be strong enough to do what I‘m destined to do.” “I don’t understand,” she said eyeing him. In that moment Harry wanted to tell her everything, the secret that he had kept to himself since that fated day when Sirius had died. His back found the cold stone wall and followed in down to the floor. “What is it, you can tell me,” Cho pleaded kneeling next to him. “No, I can’t,” Harry said mindlessly. She found a seat next to him and rested her head on his shoulder, “I’m not going to pretend I understand what your going though. All I can do is be there if you need me to be.” “If I let you into my world, he’ll kill you,” Harry said turning towards her. Cho looked at him speechless, her body quivering slightly at his words. She tried to pull his arm closer to her body, when he doubled over in pain, grabbing his forehead. “Ahhh,” Harry cringed. “Harry, are you okay,” Cho asked desperately. His face twisted in agony as his scar burned furiously, “not again.” “You have to stay away from me,” he warned Cho. “Harry I don’t understand,” she begin to cry. He rose to his feet, “don’t you see, my scar is burning again. Something terrible is about to happen.” Cho rose to her feet followed Harry’s lead, “I won’t run. You’ve got to talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.” “I have to kill him!” Harry finally screamed. “Kill who?” Cho begged. “VOLDEMORT!” As the sound of his name Harry’s scar surged with an unbearable pain that brought him to his knees. Cho rushed to his side and threw her arms around his shoulders. “I’ve got to see Dumbledore,” Harry finally choked out. Cho nodded helping him rise to his feet, “I’ll go find him.” She took off down the corridor towards the room the Quidditch captain’s meeting was being held. Harry clinched his forehead trying to block out his mind. He wasn’t going to be tricked again, he wasn’t going to let Voldemort into his mind. “Harry, are you alright?” Dumbledore asked approaching quickly, followed by Cho. “It’s happening again Professor, my scar,” Harry said in one breath. Dumbledore nodded, “I was afraid of this, take Miss Chang back to her common room and then come to my office.” He turned quickly disappearing down the dark passageways of the castle. “What’s going on?” Cho pleaded again. Harry lowered his head, “when Voldemort is up doing something particular bad, my scar hurts, like a warning.” “Oh Harry,” she whispered letting her fingers drift across his forehead. “It hasn’t happened since last year,” Harry started, but his strength failed him before he could finish. He walked with her in silence thinking about the last time his scar has erupted in pain. He rubbed his fingers across his scar trying to wipe it away, but he learned along time ago that it didn’t work like that. “This is the Ravenclaw common room entrance,” Cho said stopping suddenly. “Don’t worry, everything will be okay,” Harry said sounding unconfident. “I want to go to Dumbledore’s office with you,” Cho blurted out. Harry shook his head, “I don’t want you getting involved in this, you’ve been though enough.” “I WANT TO HELP!” Cho yelled. Harry grabbed her hand, “you don’t know what your asking.” Cho hiccupped as the tears streamed down her face, “I owe it to Cedric, and to you.” Harry leaned in and kissed her cheek lightly, “I’ll tell you everything tomorrow, I promise.” He released her hand and began to walk off knowing he had just lied. He couldn’t tell her everything, he’d be putting her in great danger. When he reached the statue that guarded Dumbledore’s he said the password, “Gawp.” His feet carried him up the spiraling stairwell into the Headmaster’s office. “Professor?” “Ah, Harry, I didn’t expect you so quickly,” Dumbledore confessed. Harry didn’t pay attention, “what’s Voldemort up to?” “Alas, we do not know. The reason I wanted you come to my office is I wanted to discuss the subject of Occlemency with you.” “He must be up to something, my scar hasn’t hurt since last year,” Harry argued. The old professor nodded his head, “indeed, but I fear it is to dangerous to leave your mind vulnerable. I’m aware Professor O’Riley had already offered to continue your lessons, but if you would prefer I also would like to offer the option of teaching you myself.” “I’m not sure I want to continue with Occlemency sir,” Harry confessed. “I was afraid you might say that. It is even more imperative to continue now. He has found a weakness in your mind, and I fear he will exploit it if you don’t learn to defend yourself.” “Professor O’Riley, is she as skilled in the subject as Snape?” Harry asked nervously. “Indeed, it was due to Professor Snape that Professor O’Riley learned to master the subject. She is one of the strongest Occlemenist I know,” Dumbledore confessed. “Won’t Occlemency weaken my mind again?” Harry asked slightly concerned. Dumbledore nodded, “indeed, I went against my better judgment not restarting your lessons when you returned to Hogwarts, but I wanted to give you time to grieve. I just pray I did not wait to long.”

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