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Chapter two – Change, The Good and the Bad.

James arrived to breakfast the next morning looking tired and dishevelled. He had spent the night in the forest taking his anger out on innocent trees and shrubs. He sat down with a sigh next to Sirius. Sirius turned sharply at the sudden presence behind him. “Prongs! What the hell happened to you? Where were you all night?”

James took a deep breath. “I had a chat to Evans. Last night after we saw Dumbledore.”

“And…?” Sirius prompted impatiently, which earned him a smack in the back of the head from Remus. James barely noticed.

“And she has a boyfriend and it’s not me because I am not what she wants. I am too arrogant and vain. I lost my chance because she can't stand me.” He recited in a straight monotone as if he had spent the night chanting it.

Sirius, Remus and Peter fell silent. What does one say to a statement that they had heard repeated for the last three years? Sirius settled for a sympathetic pat on the back and a forced grin of encouragement. James returned the smile as silent thanks for not ragging on him. He suddenly heard a familiar giggle and turned to see none other than Lily Evans walk in on the arm of Elliot Barker. James felt a series of different emotions all in a couple of seconds. He was shocked then disheartened then finally furious.

“Easy Prongs,” Sirius told him as if he had pre-empted his rage.

“I gotta get out of here.” James told them as he stood up. He left the hall so quickly that he didn’t notice Lily stop laughing to watch him walk by her.

***

“Does he annoy you yet?” Ruby asked suddenly that morning in transfiguration. Holly looked up, startled by the sudden question and the fact that her quiet and usually obedient friend wasn’t doing her assigned work.

“Does who annoy me? Coz I could think of many people who fit that description.” Holly stated wryly, looking back at her work.

Ruby rolled her eyes and quickly glanced up at McGonagall before answering. “Elliot!”

“Oh.” Holly breathed. She thought for a moment, finally looking up from her work. “Yes. But I don’t know why.”

Ruby sighed. “Me neither. I thought I was alone in these thoughts.”

“No way.” Holly shook her head. “You always had Him backing you up.”

“Who?” Ruby asked turning to see where Holly had gestured with her quill. Seeing it was James Potter she sighed again. James was staring at Lily and Elliot with a face that made her want to hug him. He looked heartbroken and ready to kill all at the same time. Tuning back she nodded grimly. “Who would ever have guessed he actually processed real feelings for her?”

Holly shook her head, picking up her quill again. “Not me…” She whispered in a voice barely heard by Ruby. But then who would have ever thought Sirius Black would ever have shown the slightest bit of interest in her?

“This years already strange and its only the first day!” Ruby whined.

“What do you mean?” Holly asked.

“Lily has a boyfriend who isn’t James and who ever thought that would happen, and look at James! So far he hasn’t done anything about it!”

“So?”

“So-o, this is the guy that has been obsessed with her for how many years and he hasn’t tried anything stupid yet?”

Holly considered this for a moment. “Fair point. So maybe you were wrong. Maybe he doesn’t care.”

Ruby snorted indignantly. “Have you seen him lately? If anything proves his feeling are genuine it’s the way he just watches her…” She finished softly.

“Aww. Is my tough girl Ruby going gooey?” Holly joked. ‘Maybe you are right. Everyone has changed. Except me. I’m still the same.”

Ruby snorted again. She couldn’t help it. “Have you seen yourself lately?”

Holly shrugged. “What? So I cut my hair. That doesn’t count as change. That was me trying to piss off my mother.”

“Exactly.”

“Exactly what?!” Holly whispered a little louder than she meant to, drawing looks from her class mates and also McGonagall.

“Exactly what?” She repeated quieter.

“It seems, Holly my dear you have finally started standing up for yourself.”

Holly sat up straighter in her seat. ‘Is that a good thing?”

Ruby nodded. “Sirius seems to think so…” She stated slyly.

Holly gasped, slapping Ruby lightly on the arm. Ruby frowned. “See, old Holly wouldn’t have done that.”

Holly grinned. “Then I like change.”

***

James had had enough. All day he had watched Lily hang off Elliot Barker and it was beginning to make him sick. James had never noticed just how many classes Elliot had with the Gryffindor’s. Lily seemed absolutely oblivious to James death stares at her new boyfriend. She was in her own world and she was deliriously happy.

By the time they had finished classes James’ jealousy and rage had simmered into a pathetic depression. Even though watching them made him want to cry he couldn’t help it. He desperately wanted to know what Lily saw in him and more than anything else wanted to be him.

He watched them all through tea, so much that he almost forgot to eat. He could see that he made her laugh but didn’t get it. He had known Elliot for years and knew that Lily deserved someone who would treat her better. Elliot was the possessive type, and James knew from watching that Lily was so smitten she would do anything to please him. it was a disaster and there was nothing he could do about it.

Suddenly, Lily turned around and caught his eye. She raised an eyebrow as if to say, yes? He quickly looked down at his still full plate then back up at Lily; she had already diverted her attention.

James stood up. He needed to get back to the common room to be alone. He strode passed Lily but she didn’t notice him this time. James took his time getting back. He dawdled along the deserted halls in the general direction but wasn’t actually aware he was walking. He suddenly stopped as he heard voices behind him. At once he knew exactly who it was so quickly ducked behind a suit of armour. They walked right by him without so much of a glance in his direction. He snorted in disgust and once they were far enough ahead, continued his journey. James reached the Fat Lady, said the password and stepped through the portrait hole into the common room only to witness Lily and Elliot sitting on a couch by the fire having a bit of alone time, James turned on his heel and went back outside into the hallway, he leaned against the cold stone wall.

(Hopelessly Devoted to You)
(A/N: well, a song that needs no introduction.)
Guess mine is not the first heart broken,
my eyes are not the first to cry I'm not the first to know,
there's just no gettin' over you
Hello, I was just a fool who's willing to sit around
and wait for you
But baby can't you see, there's nothin' else
for me to do I'm hopelessly devoted to you
But now there's nowhere to hide,
since you pushed my love aside, I'm not in my head,
Hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you,
hopelessly devoted to you
My head is saying "fool, forget her",
my heart is saying "don't let go"
Hold on to the end, that's what I intend to do
I'm hopelessly devoted to you
But now there's nowhere to hide,
since you pushed my love aside I'm not in my head,
Hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you,
hopelessly devoted to you"


***
A/N:

Hopelessly Devoted to you, Olivia Newton John, Grease.

(A/N- people please review! i need to hear you thoughts!

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