Chapter 4: Non Thieves
We raced back to the common room and sat on the couch nervously being impatient as we waited for all the Gryffindors to leave for the Halloween feast. I tried to make a run for it several times but Amy grabbed my robe and pulled me back on to the sofa. Finally the inhabitants of the room we were planning to invade came down the stairs, separately because I guess they were still a bit angry with each other. They didn’t notice us because we ducked down and the sofa back was facing them, thus shielding us from view.
“Let’s move it Prongs I’m starved” we heard as the portrait closed, Prongs? What was that about? I’m beginning to think these blokes are nutters.
Even though the common room was deserted, for some reason we tiptoed as quietly as possible over to the boy’s dormitory and scurried upstairs. We found the door marked 7th Year Male Students easily. I pushed it open and cautiously looked in.
“Are we sure about this?” I asked Amy “Once we go in here, we may learn things we cannot forget, our memories could be scarred forever, our dreams could eternally be haunted.” I would have gone on more but she rolled her eyes and shoved me into the room.
So this was the boy’s dorm. Sort of like the girls only guy stuff was everywhere instead of girl stuff.
“Which one is his?” Amy whispered as we looked over identical beds and trunks, no sign indicating who owned what. So we split up after deciding to search each one.
“Ugh, this must be James’s” I said picking up a muddy Quidditch robe that looked like it hadn’t been washed in days. How hygienic. Some papers were scattered on his bed with Lily’s initials in a heart. This boy was border lining creepy. I felt a little disappointed his Quidditch robes were all gross and what not, I have a secret ambition to try on the Gryffindor uniform and strut around even though I have no clue how to play.
“Ew, you don’t even want to know what’s in Peter’s trunk” Amy called out from across the room.
“Why are you looking in his trunk?” I called back, I was now going through a bag with such messy writing, that I knew it couldn’t be Mr. Prefects. Who the heck was Padfoot?
“I didn’t know it was his until I read the name on the inside, and you were right, I’ve learned something I don’t think I’m likely to forget no matter how hard I try.”
I continued rummaging through the same trunk because I felt intrigued. I lifted a mirror and snorted. This had to be Sirius’s then. Reluctantly I moved on after confirming it wasn’t Remus’s, curiously would have to wait.
After merely opening the next one I triumphantly found Remus’s bag, and VOILA, squeezed in between some papers and hopefully unread was the incriminating note.
“Jackpot! Lets get the heck outta here Aimes, the feast should be ending and everyone will be back soon with their stupid satisfied stomachs.”
“Whoa, Paige come here, you have to see this.”
I glanced over and saw her staring at a piece of parchment that was lying on top of one of the trunks.
“What is it, the answers to our next potions test?” I asked hopefully.
When I came closer I saw that it was some sort of map with dots moving around. Then I realized it was a map of Hogwarts. And the dots were people. And it showed secret passage ways. And……oh my giddy god, it showed the location to THE KITCHENS!
“Amy!” I shrieked, “The kitchens, there is bound to be some left over Halloween feast food.”
I snatched the map up and started towards the door. She wasn’t following me; I turned around and tapped my foot impatiently. “I saved you, now you must save me from the anger of my stomach”
Amy hesitated “Maybe we shouldn’t steal this”
Now she decided to be respectful of other people’s privacy. “We’re borrowing it for a little bit, that’s all” I told her distractedly as I was still staring at this wonderful treasure.
She remained standing for a bit and suddenly we both heard her stomach growl. I grinned; this was definitely a win for me.
“Alright, let’s get going already” She said passing me.
As soon as we reached the common room people began pouring in, I held the map behind my back when I saw the owners enter.
“Top of the morning to yah” I greeted cheerfully and side stepped by them.
“Err, I hope you guys had a good meal” Amy told them as I awkwardly walked backwards with a large grin plastered on my face.
“Uh, you too” James spoke for them, his eyebrows raised.
“Oh we will” I whispered to my friend as we stepped out of the entrance.
We navigated the hallways, ignoring the teachers telling everyone to return to their houses. Finally we stopped at a painting of fruit.
“Argh the kitchen entrance is right here, what do we do?” I whined.
Amy hit it, pulled the frame and yelled some confusing words at it, but the painting wouldn’t budge.
I looked down at the map again and realized it was changing.
Mr. Wormtail would like to suggest that the angry ladies tickle a fruit to get in
Well that was annoying and slightly creepy. I looked at Amy and we had a quick match of rock paper scissors. Damn, she always beats my rock with that infuriating paper.
I reached out slowly and tickled the apple. Once again nothing happened, except I’m sure I was looking very stupid tickling a painting. The map changed again.
Mr. Prongs would like to add that the lovely ladies should more specifically tickle the pear
Prongs, that was the name I heard Sirius call James before they left the common room. I wondered if they actually created this map instead of buying it from some joke shop, but my thoughts were interrupted by the opening now in front of me from Amy impatiently tickling the pear while I was thinking.
We walked in unsure and were met by a breathtaking sight.
“More hot cocoa Miss Springer?” A house elf asked me.
“Oh yes Dodger, please and the turkey was divine!” I replied and he or maybe it was a she gave an excited squeak and in seconds I had a refill.
Amy leaned back in her chair, “Oh man I have never been so happily stuffed, kudos to you for suggesting borrowing this map”
I sipped my hot chocolate, which was just the right temperature and smiled.
“We should be heading back though, it’s after hours”
“Alright” She sighed and got up and stretched before rubbing her stomach.
“Ugh don’t get sick on me, you kept us up all night last time you ate too much”
“I’m fine” she muttered but I thought she was starting to look a little pale. “Let’s go, we can slip the map under the door or something”
I was a little disappointed; I wanted to keep it for a little while longer. Which is way the entire way back I tried to persuade her into my way of thinking. She is much more honorable than I.
We were almost back at the fat lady’s portrait when we heard a familiar voice.
“What are you two doing out here” To our relief it was Lily but maybe that wasn’t so good. I heard she even gave prefects detentions when they were out after hours while off duty. What’s the point in having power if you can’t get away with things yourself? Well I’m sure there is a point that doesn’t register with slackers like me.
I gave her my innocent face but she crossed her arms.
“Don’t expect me to go easy on you because we are friends, you guys are still out of bed after hours.” She scolded.
I gasped, “Is it actually after hours? We had no clue.”
She chuckled a little “Alright, get your behinds into bed though” Amy almost left but stopped and said “Don’t worry Potter already told us to go back to bed, he is doing some patrolling.”
“Really” Lily asked “Doing extra patrolling, how very…Head Boy of him.” And with a thoughtful look on her face, she turned and went downstairs.
“You have to let this go” I told her sternly as we made our way to the boy’s dorm, unsure of how we would slip that map back. As we reached their door, loud voices could be heard.
My friend looked at me conflicted, “should we?”
“Its human nature to be curious” I answered her and we leaned on the door with our ears pressed firmly against it.
“Come on Mooney, its got to be here somewhere” We heard Sirius say tiredly.
Amy and I exchanged looks. Mooney, I did not want to know where that nickname came from, although it may have been a funny story
“Are you sure, Padfoot? Maybe you just gave it to Snape, we all know how you love sharing secrets with him.” Remus shouted at him. Harsh. Who would tell Snape a secret? I flashed back to seeing them talking together in the hallway. What was this all about?
“Lay off him Mooney! He said he was sorry” I heard James yell. Hmmm I wonder if he is Prongs, poor Peter has got to be Wormtail. The quietest ones always get the worst of the nicknames.
Remus sounded even more upset. “Of course you would take his side; I can’t listen to you two anymore!” Before we could react the door flew open and we shrieked and fell into the room.
The boys stared at us, once again mystified at our tendency to get into weird situations. Oh well, one day they’ll get used to it. I don’t know how they survived Hogwarts without one of us getting tangled up in their path.
“Haha, well Amy what do you know, this isn’t the girls dorm it’s the boys!” I tried to be smooth, standing up and dusting myself off.
“How much did you hear?” James asked accusingly, we couldn’t tell if he was still upset from before or just majorly pissed at us. Please be the other one.
“Just some shouting and really weird nicknames” Amy grumbled still on the floor, Remus walked over and helped her up, and then they all noticed the parchment in her hand. Oh this isn’t going to turn out well.
Sirius walked over and snatched it, “What, you two stole this from us?” he asked with a little bit of shock and anger in his voice. He turned to me “First you eavesdrop in the dungeons and now your stealing our stuff, what is it with you two”
Excuse me! So he’s bringing that up again.
“To be fair we only borrowed it and besides we were only up here in the first place because Lupin stole something from us and I wasn’t eavesdropping” I found myself saying defensively and rather loudly.
Remus looked at us confused and said “I never took anything of yours.”
I found myself going slightly pink and trying to explain “Well you didn’t really steal it on purpose, it was sort of involuntarily and we came to get it back and the map was there, and well what would you have done?”
“We were very hungry” Amy agreed. She was looking a little green too. Uh oh.
Peter took the chance to speak up and startled me once again “We probably would have taken it, and there may have been a chance we wouldn’t have given it back, so it’s nice that you guys did.”
I beamed at him. With out a doubt he was now my favourite Marauder.
“You are my favourite Marauder” I told him, vocalizing my thoughts. He smiled back at me. I turned and narrowed my eyes at Sirius “You are my least favourite”
He looked at me like I was crazy.
“Wait, so am I second or third?” James asked, seemingly forgetting to be mad. I put my hand to my chin and thought. “I guess you are my third”
“Remus saved me from choking, life saving puts you high up there”
“This is ridiculous” Sirius interjected. I bet he was just mad that I liked him least. Or he had some maturity.
“Hush number four” I scolded him.
“Don’t call me number four!” he shot back. I tried starring him down and slowly raised my hand with four fingers sticking up.
“I’m going to curse those bloody fingers off if you don’t put them down” he threatened. I tried to hold it in but a small laugh escaped from my mouth, I covered my lips with my fingers to hold back a smile. He bit his lip slightly to hold back his own laugh.
“You are slightly mad, you do know that” he told me. Ha! Says the boy who was just threatening me with physical violence for giving him a four fingered hand gesture.
“So I’m told” I answered and straightened my robe absentmindedly.
It was time for us to make a quick exit I decided, but I was interrupted by Amy throwing up all over the floor.
“Knew I shouldn’t have tried the tofu turkey” She grimaced.
Noticing that she looked faint as well as sick I yelled “Remus catch her” as she swayed a bit and fell back. He caught her and Sirius came over to give him a hand and each of them put one of her arms over their shoulders.
The four of us then made our way to the hospital wing. If she had been conscious, she may have died of happiness when she found out who caught her. I guess our life and death situation worked, only not in a very classy way.
“You know that was my first time ever in the hospital wing” I supplied as we left the room, assured by the nurse that Amy would be fine after a night of rest and a few potions.
They both laughed. “We spend half our lives in there” Sirius said fondly.
It didn’t take long for it to be awkward again as the two realized they had been fighting not too long ago. Well if Amy could meddlein matchmaking I could dabble in friendship healing.
“You guys should make up; I mean Sirius really seems to be upset and sorry for whatever he did.” I said trying to break the tension.
“I am buddy.” He said to agreeing with me and thankfully not asking me to butt out.
Remus sighed “I know I don’t like there being conflict between us.”
We continued walking quietly but something terrible seemed to have gone away.
“Yeah, conflict is bad” I announced, for some reason needing to point out the obvious.
HEY, boys shouldn’t be allowed to smack girls in the head. Even if it is lightly.
The next morning Aimstar was still in the hospital wing and it was up to me to bring her homework to her. Of course I never stop my genius planning and decided I needed to continue my own little match making game I had started earlier on in the year. Hey if she can get Lily to think well of James (She was polite to him at breakfast) then I can certainly do this. Plus I have less of a challenge since she is completely wonderful and Remus would be an idiot to not want her.
As soon as class was over, I took my chance.
“Remus, would you mind taking Amy her homework for me? I have to get to the library really quickly to find a book and I know she would want her homework right away” I lied.
“Sure thing” he said taking the books out of my hand but I wasn’t finished yet.
“Also do you think you could bring her something, you know to cheer her up, she hates being sick.” I pleaded with big eyes.
He smiled “Of course, I don’t much like being sick myself.”
Muhahaha I walked down the hall with a huge grin on my face. Unfortunately my grin slowly faded as I saw Kimberly Roberts walking down the hall in my direction, two of her little friends behind her. She was laughing at something while seductively licking the pudding off her spoon to the delight of the various boys in the hallway. When she saw me she immediately headed toward me with a look of determination on her face.
She seemed to be very pissed with me these days. I don’t know what an innocent girl like me does to deserve this kind of treatment.
She stopped with a bit of distance, like I would give her some sort of contagious disease if she got too close. Sheesh, more like the other way around.
“So” was her opening statement. We stood there for a bit. I didn’t know if I was supposed to respond or not. I checked my watch after a bit, how long was this going to take? I was rather hungry at the moment.
“So” she repeated before finally adding some words to the conversation “The loser twins have somehow managed to become friends with Lily Evans and the Marauders and now you both think you’re on top of the school”
I didn’t answer her. I had a feeling I was about to be threatened and making fun of her lack of speaking skills wouldn’t help me.
“You two must be great actors,” she continued “I mean you must have had to pretend to be pretty interesting for them to like you freaks.”
“Seriously Kimberly, what have I ever done to you besides laugh at you behind your back, steal your friend and totally become best buds with your crushes” I told her. Oh dear this “being the big man” and walking away thing clearly wasn’t me.
“Well you guys better remember what its like to being all alone because it won’t last”
“What? Our friendship or your waist size without surgery” I snarked at her and indicated to her pudding. Alright I lied; making fun of her did help, even if my insult was extremely petty and hypocritical since I eat mountains of pudding on a daily basis.
She moved towards me, erasing the distance between us.
“Freak” she spat.
“Slag” I fired back.
OW, she slapped me across the face. Really hard too. I can’t believe how disgusted I am, a slap? That is so cliché. So low. So childish. So……..girly.
“You cow!” I yelled at her. I do not like being slapped. And you know what she did right after? She shoved me. She reached out with her perfect little manicured hands and shoved me then took out her wand, to ensure I didn’t whip out mine to hex her. Remember when I said muggles could be more macho without the use of wands? Well there was just enough space for arm reach.
So I punched her in the nose. That’s how we real women do it.
A/N: Wahoo! I got the chapter out earlier than I expected. The funny thing is I already have many ideas for chapter 6 and 7 but for 5, I only have a few. So that chapter might take a little longer to get out.
Again, I love my reviewers, you guys rock my socks off and I have to wear sandals. I have no idea where I heard that but I decided to put it in anyways.
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