27 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Adina Late Night Visitor

18th May 2017:
Why have you deleted everything, I was right in the middle of reading it😔 It's so good

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Review #2, by HPfanbf85 Late Night Visitor

17th May 2017:
This is a really great story! I enjoyed it greatly. But now it is only showing chapter 1 and the two sequels are completely gone. Do you know what happened?

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Review #3, by LilyPotterEvans1976 Late Night Visitor

4th September 2015:
I loved this Chapter, it reads like JK'S work, I was picturing that scene with the hose and laughing out loud he he, also the scene on the roof with Dobby (Dobby *sniff* ) Fantastic start 10/10 xxx

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Review #4, by taylor Late Night Visitor

16th August 2013:
Good first chapter. I can't wait to read the rest of this epic story. I was curious though, have you considered also publishing this on fanfiction dot net for ease of access? Since it's already finished, it wouldn't be time consuming at all.

Author's Response: I was on there with this story years ago but found I liked HPFF better. Hope you enjoy the story!

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Review #5, by MUFC Late Night Visitor

17th July 2013:
just read the first chapter. seems a good read. i have been waiting for a good fanfic for a long time. hope this fulfills my expectation. though if the rest of the book is anything like this, then i know that i am in for a good read.

Author's Response: We've talked through my FB page and though you've told me you already caught up to the latest chapter in CoW and told me you like the story very much, I'm going to answer your reviews anyway :) I think it's important to address any thoughts you had while reading.

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Review #6, by luke544313@gmail.com Late Night Visitor

22nd May 2013:
wow, just from this first chapter i can tell that you are a great writer and i can tell that i am going to be pulling an all-nighter to read this. Hopefully I won't fail my final for reading this instead of studying.
P.S. if you have or ever write a book please email me so i can read it. email me below.

Author's Response: I'm glad you like the story but please don't fail any finals because of it! :) I am writing a book, but I have also completed a script and am moving into preproduction to get it filmed. I can't post links, but here is the address to my public FB page with the . and / spelled out... check it out and like for updates about all aspects of my career... my real name is Kris by the way :)
www(dot)facebook(dot)com(slash)#!(slash)pages(slash)Kris-Williamson(slash)443820389044174


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Review #7, by Mr White Late Night Visitor

4th April 2013:
Liked it a lot, and you have a writing style similar to Rowling. The only thing I disliked was the use of the term "screwed this up", which gave it an informal and slangy tone. Other than that I enjoyed it a lot and will likely be reading the rest of this story

Author's Response: Well I'm glad you like it so far! As to the casual slang, I've realized reading back that I put alot of my own dialogue and sayings in these character's mouths so you're bound to see more like it. Sorry if it takes you out of the story but I guess it's just my writing style :) Looking forward to hearing any further thoughts you may have as you read, thanks for giving the story a try!

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Review #8, by Lady Asphodel Late Night Visitor

17th January 2013:
Hello! Just wanna say it was a very good chapter and I love the humor to this as well. So far you've got great characterization of the trio and I love love the part of what Harry did to Vernon.

I'll be reading on. :)

Author's Response: Thank you! The part about Vernon is a foreshadowing of other things coming as you'll find out... Hopefully you continue to enjoy the story and continue on to the sequel. Thank you for taking the time to stop and tell me you enjoyed the chapter, I appreciate it greatly :) Happy reading!

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Review #9, by Kevin Late Night Visitor

5th November 2012:
So far so good. I like your writing style. I can picture the characters in the scenes.

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Review #10, by Hippothestrowl Late Night Visitor

28th October 2012:
There are a few strange anomalies at the start so I almost gave up but I persisted! Drive should never be abbreviated to Dr in a narrative. Few of us in the UK have air-conditioning (even 15 years later!) probably less than 1 in a 100. Nobody in the UK walks on the sloping, slate roof of this sort of house. It's dangerous and inaccessible without a ladder from outside. These houses are only two stories high plus loft space under the roof so Harry could not swing 'a few stories above the ground' - indeed, such a fall might be fatal. Yet Harry, who ought to be terrified, simply says (tiredly,) "Hi Dobby," as if he were out for a walk in the park. Anyway, maybe all the above would only amaze a Brit and overseas readers might not notice so they can be regarded as trivial.

I persisted because it's well-written, easy-reading, has good pace, and a promising storyline. As one or two reviewers have said, it's written in a similar style to JKR so that's not only tried and tested but it fits Harry Potter-type stories. I aim for the same style in my own fics - though far from perfect!

Author's Response: Yes, you've uncovered my secret, I'm American :) I do try to think like a Brit while writing this, but it's difficult as I've never been to any other countries except Canada and Mexico and therefore recieve all my culture through media which is not always true to life. All I can say on those points is sorry, I gave it my best shot. I had no idea about air conditioning over there, it just worked with my story and figuring Dursley was the type to always want/have the latest and best they'd have one. As to the roof, it also simply worked for the storytelling... I have no other explanation so I guess I'd ask that you just suspend reality with me there :) As to Harry's lack of terror... that was a character choice on my part... I figure he's been through so much at this point, dangling from his broom from much higher in the air, his more logical side would kick in for a smaller scare like that.

I'm glad you persisted and hope the story continues to capture your attention though I understand that everyone likes different things. Thank you for the compliments on my writing, it is what I'm trying to do for a living. I realize there are several typos and misspellings in these chapters, hopefully they aren't too distracting and someday I'll have the time to go through and fix them all...

I'll have to check out your stories in my ever dwindling downtime. Again thanks for reading and leaving your thoughts, I truly appreciate it!


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Review #11, by Blaise Zabinis Fiancee Late Night Visitor

11th September 2012:
I really like how you started the story off! I saw that you commented you were trying to write similarly to how JK starts the books -- you did a really great job. The first chapters are always a bit slow and uninteresting, but preluding to some sort of excitement to come. That Harry is still on Privet Drive, and that the Dursleys are even more controlling than ever makes it feel even more in line with how the novels start ^_^

I think some of my favorite parts were the little quirks about the characters, like how Hermione jumps straight into schooling, or Ron sticks his foot right into his mouth, or Harry's small, personal escapes from the outside world. Hermione and Ron's bickering is more similar to how me and my brothers fight than to how two people in denial of their love might. I don't know if you did that intentionally or not, but seeing as this is a Harmony fic. I however did have a slight problem with Dobby. There was just a bit about his mannerisms that bothered me I guess. Like, Dobby would never throw but place something where it belongs. I know it's like, nit-picking, but that was the only thing that got under my skin forreal. I really want to continue reading, but I have to get up in the morning for school... bleh.

I will be back though!

Author's Response: Well, I'm glad you liked the first chapter, and yes... I've found that writing Dobby is a bit harder than everyone else... but there are more scenes to come with him, in this story and the sequel so hopefully those will be a little more like him... but you are right and perhaps a change in wording is required here.

The characters will start out much how they were outlined by Rowling... but as they begin living the life I lined out for them here, they may change from what you recognize, but I have tried to keep them true to their core characteristics and how I would think they'd react to the situations they face in this story.

Ron's crush on Hermione will definitely be addressed in this story so look for a bit of drama there... It's hard to say anything when you're only a chapter in... I don't want to give any spoilers :)

Let's just say I tried to address everything that came before while at the same time changing it to fit the way I want things to go in that world.

Have a good day at school, thanks for reading and reviewing, I find it encouraging :) Happy reading!


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Review #12, by DUMBELDAVE Late Night Visitor

27th June 2012:
Well I just found your story and it looked interesting ,and there is nothing I like better than a lot of chapters waiting for me to read !

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Review #13, by Stina Late Night Visitor

10th June 2012:
Harry and Hermione better get together...

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Review #14, by Original Name Late Night Visitor

10th April 2012:
I like the changes you've made with the addition of Dobby, and the early foreshadowing of Harry's telekinetic abilities. I was a little skeptical to the probability of bringing RoM up to the same standard as CoW, but the extra little bit of detailing and the expansion on the depth of the story has worked wonders.

I only noticed a few small things like, I would query the use of a conjunction to start a paragraph. I know that it was frowned upon whilst I was in primary school, that is, to start a sentence with a conjunction. Although I know that starting a sentence with "and" or "but" is quite acceptable nowadays, so I'm not sure if that's the same with the start of a paragraph. Thought I should mention it anyway.
Apart from that and the some missing capital letter's in "the Order" or one of the "Hogwarts: A History" it seemed fine to my eyes.

Also I remember being quite confused the first time I read this story as to why there were speech marks around the letter. I'm glad to say that I finally understand that the letter was (for lack of a better word) "regurgitating" Ron and Hermione's words.

Well one chapter down, only 37 to go. If all the chapter's are this well written then my job's going to be incredibly easy.

Author's Response: The conjunction thing doesn't bother me, it may be frowned upon but there are tons of books where they go ahead and do it anyway. I was looking more for like really obvious grammar issues, because most of this gets written at night while my roommate is asleep so I can use the computer, and my attention to details like that tends to wane with the hour.

I also was looking for the first part of your review. I want to know that the things I'm changing and adding to the story are strengthening it and not bogging it down unnecessarily. I'm glad you liked the improvements, I never liked this chapter before, it was like the thing I had to write to get into the story (That's how I always feel when writing a 1st chapter though) And since Dobby was one of the characters I loved from the books but haven't done much with here, I decided it would be a perfect place to put him in. Thanks for starting to do this, looking forward to you thoughts about the rest.


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Review #15, by Yigit Late Night Visitor

3rd February 2012:
its a very good start i'd say as a person who normally doesn't enjoy reading fanfiction that much.. i love the series (read the 7 book 7 times each) therefore i feel like this should be the start of the 6th book which is my least favorite.

Author's Response: The 6th and 7th books were my least favorite which is why I took to writing these stories, to create an ending I liked better. Ring of Mykele is my version of the 6th year and the sequel currently a WIP, Coven of Warriors, takes the place of their 7th year. I'm actually doing a major overhaul on this story now that it's complete and I know what my intentions were, I've already re-edited through chapter 26 with a lot more to go. I hope you give it a chance and read some more of the story. Thanks for stopping to leave your opinion, happy reading!

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Review #16, by Eleon Riddle Late Night Visitor

11th December 2011:
Great chapter it kept me up

Author's Response: Thank you, hopefully you'll continue to read on and enjoy the rest of the story and sequel as well. Thanks for stopping to let me know you like it so far!

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Review #17, by Eleon Riddle Late Night Visitor

11th December 2011:
Great chapter it kept me up

Author's Response: Thank you, I do hope you read on because it does pick up and get better. I appreciate you stopping to let me know you liked it. Happy reading!

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Review #18, by luving_harry_potter Late Night Visitor

26th August 2007:
Every good opening chapater, can't wait to read more but I thought I'd leave a quick review. The way you write Harry, Ron and Hermione is very good.

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Review #19, by White Guy Late Night Visitor

16th March 2007:
I like it it is a good beginning and i am looking forward to reaading the rest of it. Hope it gets finished before I read it all.
Good luck and good job, I can't wrtie notin interesting.

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Review #20, by ahmadzizo Late Night Visitor

31st July 2005:
r u ok serena?

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Review #21, by ahmadzizo Late Night Visitor

2nd March 2005:
hey, long time since last chapter.. hope everything is ok! may be u r a little busy or something... just wanted to say hi..see ya...

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Review #22, by ahmadzizo Late Night Visitor

20th February 2005:
no need for the sorry part...i know how it is like when u can't sleep well...and really i am not upset or anything :). homework going well?:P and what about the newspaper ? hope everything is ok..waiting for the next chapter.. see ya then..:)

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Review #23, by emlow Late Night Visitor

14th January 2005:
just wondering, i dont support it so i guess this story isnt for me.

Author's Response: You don't supprt a H/Hr story? Well, this is more than that. As I said romance is one aspect of it, and while there will inevitably be some romantic scenes, I hoped that there was more to take away from it than just the H/Hr aspect. But if you honestly weren't enjoying anything else, then I respect your decision. Thanks for trying it though!

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Review #24, by annabella Late Night Visitor

7th January 2005:
Once again I am thrilled, amazing inticed and enchanted. Now Im starting my second fan fic (well 3rd actually, my first has a sequal) and enlighted by your way of writting i have decided to take more time and pride in my work. Thanx for yet another great chapter, don't stop!!!!! P.S the name of my story is 'Between the Sheets'

Author's Response: Glad to be a sort of inspiration and I will gladly read your story as it sounds like it's dirty.

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Review #25, by Alandra Late Night Visitor

15th December 2004:
I absolutely love your story! Please update soon! It's just great!!!!

Author's Response: Thanks= you so much. Chapter four will be up today and I hope to post five tomorrow. Trust me, it will get more exciting.

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