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Reading Reviews for Hopeless Manifestations
  
35 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Probgslittleflower Anxiety Rising

7th September 2017:
Hope you decide to continue! Can't wait to read more!

Author's Response: I'm glad you love it! and don't worry, I haven't given up yet ahah

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Review #2, by Glisten  Anxiety Rising

15th July 2017:
N O O O O! Not the end! Now I have to wait! Charlie please, please, PLEASE release an update soon. I mean, obviously take the time you need to make it a quality one but still try to hurry a bit before I spontaneously combust with avidity!

Er, I mean... no pressure!

I adore this chapter so much! Poor Aria! All the pressure seems to have caught up to her. That Pureblood second year, (Lilith was it?) was just in the wrong place at the wrong time! Now Aria's mom is going to find out! I wonder, is she going to stand up to her mother or maybe try to justify why Lillith was wrong? I guess she could always say she had to talk with him since they were on prefect rounds together, right?

I'm so fond of the way you've portrayed Al Potter! It makes a lot of sense that he wouldn't be prejudiced towards Aria. He seems like such a sweet guy and I just know he and Aria will make an awesome pair of friends.

I don't have a good feeling about this Alfie guy! Gosh he's not even being flirtatious it's more like downright threatening and creepy. He weirds me out so much and the chapter before this one helped me realize that there's a big difference between him and James.

Oh, speaking of which I can go on forever about James! I feel like Aria certainly was being a bit cold towards him in the beginning and I was so happy when he went after her when she was having her breakdown! I really hope it'll help their relationship improve. I think it was good that he was able to be there because I know that sometimes people feel they need to be alone when in reality it's always nice to have something there with you.

The list at the end was helpful since there's lots of new names.

Very touching chapter, for sure! I'll be checking for an update every day. Do you have an estimated time for that to happen by the way? I'd really appreciate it!

It appears as though I've grown very late for the dinner party. It was totally worth it though. I just noticed your replies on my other reviews and I look forward to reading your responses in the morning! By the way, your explaination of the Verity part defiately made sense. I mean, with all those girls flocking about him like they've all had a few bottles of Amortentia he probably isn't going to be really caring about what their names are. Ta-ta until chapter 6 (or until I get too impatient and start stalking your author page) ;)

Author's Response: Ah you made it to the last chapter, I really should hurry up because spontaneous combustion is less than favourable and I think we would both like to avoid that.
I'm glad you love this chapter because I was so conflicted about it, I felt like it was all too soon and it was a bit out of character that she was so open with Albus.
I'm also pleased that you like this Albus. Fun fact: this isn't how I actually picture Albus in my head at all but I felt like Aria needs just a good person who kind of understands her. I can visualise him like this but to me I've always seen him as the son who hates the fact that Harry Potter is his father not because he hates his dad, he loves him he just struggles with the pressure of his surname. He feels like he can never live up to that name and that he's a constant disappointment to his family (even though he isn't) and he feels like James is this star son (even though Harry sees more of himself in ALbus but Al just doesn't realise it).

I'm working on the first chapter of a fic at the minute where Al is like that and he ends up going to this school of magical espionage to train to become a spy to try and earn a place on this team called Intego which consists of like some of the worlds most dangerous and talented adolescents who are basically a team of young magical spies. It's kinda like Harry Potter stroke Alex Rider with a hint of James Bond and Kingsman but I prefer my writing style in it to this one.
Okayyy, that began to sound really like a self promo but it totally wasn't meant to be, I'm sorry. What I was basically trying to say is that if you want to see how I actually picture Al then you could always check that out when I upload but it's up to you ahah.

Alfie really is a creep, he's going to cause all kinds of trouble.

It was good of James to go to her and help her during the panic attack but Aria doesn't think like your normal person so we will see what the effect on the relationship is :)

As for timescale, I'm currently rewriting and adding scenes to this chapter (there's some Aiden in here now yey) which will take a few days to do and then a day or two to validate so you'll have some more of this chapter within a week probably. As for a completely new chapter I'm not quite sure it depends how motivated I am and which fic I'm in the mood to write but it shouldn't be ages.
Once again, thank you for all these amazing reviews you've left me with and I can't wait to see you again for chapter six ahah. Also feel free to stalk my author page but note that there's a scorose on there which I kinda hate so it's abandoned.

BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING!


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Review #3, by Glisten  Of Cauldrons And Conundrums

15th July 2017:
I really enjoyed Aria and James' interactions throughout although I'd be lying if I said I wasn't equally as excited for Albus to be introduced. I'm wishing that there's going to be some mention of him in the next chapter because I'm really interested in getting to see your enterpreutation of him. I'm hoping that the prefect rounds are coming up soon.

I like how you made James good at potions, I see your straying from the cliche "James is arrogant and only good at Quidditch and females" thing, which I had a feeling you would at some point. Perhaps Harry gave him some of the Prince's tips? Either that or he's just naturally a potions genius.

So far Alfie has been lurking very ominously in the background ever since that first encounter. I wonder when he's going to try talking to Aria again? He defiately made it sound like he was targeting her on the Hogwarts Express so I have no doubt he's going to attempt something again soon.

Characters I like? Well I kind of like them all if that's acceptable, I feel like any character that has the amount of thought that you put into yours is likable, whether they have dominant positive traits or not.

First of all, I simply adore Aiden, he's a funny male character that every group of friends should have. I'm hoping I'll get to see more of him in future chapters since so far he's had a fairly minor role. Also, I see that Professor Noble's got those witty teacher lines up his sleeves, I like it!

I know I already said it in all my other reviews but I'll just reiterate for good measure: you're a fantastic writer with an awesome voice! 10/10 as usual! Oh, and also this chapter has a very nice title. Just a random thing that was on my mind.

Author's Response: Hello and thank you once more for such a lovely long review I really do appreciate it :)
Although I haven't read it yet I noticed that you've left a review for the next chapter which means that you've already met Al and I hope you love him (I'm also sure that you've now found out that the prefect rounds did come up soon ahah).
Yeah I kind of wanted to steer clear of that cliche as although he puts himself across as a mix of arrogance, women and quidditch there's a lot more to him than that. I still wanted to keep the whole 'bit (a lot) of an idiot' kind of James as I feel it makes the story much more interesting than if it was all sunshine and rainbows.
It's a coincidence that you pointed out that you love Aiden actually because originally he was just going to be a minor character that popped up for a scene here and there every few chapters but as I was rewriting chapter three, I realised that:
a) the story kind of needs someone like him
b) a love him quite a bit
So therefore you should be pleased to know that I spent half an hour a few days ago planning him some storylines of his own.
Thank you once again :)))


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Review #4, by Glisten  Raindrops Falling

15th July 2017:
SIGH! One hour ago I said I didn't have time to read this chapter and now look at me, hiding in the toilets reading the next chapter like my sanity depends on it (which in some ways it kinda does). This rant will probably be slightly shorter than my previous two, as I've spent a suspicious quantity of time in this stall. The shortness of this review could either be a good or bad thing, so I'll offer you my apologies as well as a "you're welcome" for whichever one it is, haha!

I wonder how Harry and Ginny let James become such an arrogant prat? I can't think of who is worse, him or Alfie! It makes for an interesting story though and I'm looking forward to reading the repercussions that'll follow the fake name. If Verity is his number one fan, though, wouldn't he know who she is? Perhaps it's a secret fan club.

I don't think having a filler is possible for you, since this chapter, which was supposed to be "not that great", is written just as epically as the others and therefore cannot, in my humble opinion, EVER be considered a filler.

I am excited to read the next chapter yet find fear growing inside me since the end of your released chapters is coming closer! I have no clue how I'll survive the days or weeks that I'll have to wait without this story. If you hear news of a Harry Potter nerd found rocking in a corner whispering "must wait patiently for hopeless manifestations" to herself on loop then I guess you'll know who it is!

I really have to get back to work now and even though I have a dinner engagement later today, I'll probably find myself reading the next chapter and then making a hasty excuse for my lateness. Once again, you've done a very splendid job with these chapters and thank you very much.

Author's Response: If your sanity depends on it then I better hurry up and get writing more chapters so that we can keep your mental stability intact ahah.
James does appear quite the arrogant prat doesn't he which is very much against how Harry and Ginny would have raised him but there are reasons for his behaviour, ones which will become more apparent as the story progresses. As for the verity thing, I'm glad you've pointed it out as I should have explained it so I'll make sure to slip it in there next time I make some edits. Basically with the crazed fangirl types who are constantly pining after him, it frustrates him a lot with their letters and potions ect so he doesn't pay that much attention to them, certainly not enough to know their names. He kind of just knows them as the crazy fanclub types. Hope that clears it up a little :)
Getting to the end of the uploaded chapters of an unfinished is not fun (it happened to me the other day with one that turned out to be abandoned and I could have cried) so I'll have to get to work and give you some more to read. This was the last nicely edited and rewritten chapter so I do apologise for the coming two as I feel like they need some work (especially five, it feels rushed and doesn't quite sit right with me). But, when you've finished, if you see that I've updated it but there's no new chapter, I'd advise that you go look back at either chapter 4 or 5 because there will be more added to them (chapter 2 more than doubled in size when I edited) so when I make some edits there will definitely be more to read if you're feeling a little deprived.
Once again, thank you so much for the review!
P.S. I hope you manage to come up with a suitable excuse for either:
a) your lengthy stay in the toilets
b) your potential lateness to your dinner arrangements
I apologise for both (but kinda don't too because I'm glad you're loving it ahah)
P.P.S. I've just seen that you've posted another review for the next chapter which I will reply to in the morning since it's like half eleven here in the UK and I'm something of a lightweight when it comes to sleep ahah.



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Review #5, by Glisten  Hate At First Sight

15th July 2017:
I read this chapter yesterday and I could've sworn I submitted the review but I must have just pressed "Preview" or something. I believe I remember everything I said, though.

I beleive that I've fallen in love with Aria. I mean, not FALLEN in love, but I really like her as a character you know what I mean? She has an awesome sense of humor and just has the perfect responses to everything. The part she went and told McLaggen that James wanted her back was honestly priceless! My friend walked in right after I read that part and pointed out that I had a stupid grin on my face, haha!

Oh, and way the first thing that came to her head was "Objectification" when James hit on her was just great! Yet, even though her personality is awesome, you still point out her human flaws, which makes her realistic and even more likeable.

It's sad that she has to pretend to believe in Pureblood supremacy. She's being held back because she can't talk to most of the people in her school without her mother finding out and getting mad. If only Keres wasn't so gossipy maybe she'd be able to socialize with muggleborns without her parents knowing? Speaking of Keres, she certainly is a piece of work! I'm actually really surprised that Erebus is able to put up with her! He seems to be a pretty decent guy.

There's just so much detail to your story and everything is so well written! You put so much thought into your characters. This I should such a quality story and I'm so glad to have found it. Unfortunately I haven't got enough time today to go onto the next chapter, but I can guarantee it's going to be on my mind all day! Thank you so much for writing and posting this.

I noticed your response to the last review and I really appreciate the time you put into it. I love it when an author responds to my review, so thanks for that.

Stupendous job so far!

Author's Response: I completely wasn't expecting a review for every chapter but it seems like that's what you're doing and I honestly can't thank you enough, like it really just makes me smile. And aw I'm glad you appreciated the response, when you spent the time writing such a long review I didn't want to leave just a sentence in response and I do like a good little chat (plus I'm awful for rambling ahah).
I'm so pleased that you love Aria I sometimes worry that not many people share my love of flawed or damaged characters of which Aria is a representation of both. She does have a very 'I don't put up with other people's rubbish' kind of attitude which, when it comes to James, she is struggling to balance it with the whole try to remain anonymous thing. I kind of wanted to get that attitude across with the whole 'objectification' thing as most of the female population of Hogwarts (and definitely some of the males) that he isn't related to or family friends with (E.g Longbottoms and Scamanders (Luna's kids)) get a little star struck around him and just see it as 'omg James Potter is flirting with me' whereas Aria see's it for what it really is: objectification.
She really does have to put up one hell of a facade, especially around Keres, but since Aria has managed to pretty much perfect the art of lying and deception Keres actually trusts her so, as long as Aria tries to talk to as few people as possible so not to get herself noticed, Keres pays little attention to her which is helpful. Erebus is certainly more mild mannered than Keres but he unfortunately has to put up with her. Ah the benefits of pureblood arranged marriages.
Thank you so so much for writing such a long review and I hope you continue to enjoy :)


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Review #6, by Glisten  The Sacred Eight

15th July 2017:
You have a wonderfully unique writing voice that is intriguing and downright addicting! You had a very strong start there that was very engaging. I'm proud to share that I did, in fact, know what "sonder" means because I tend to be a nerd that Googles thing like "the most beautiful words in the English language". It's actually such a coincidence that I stumbled across your story when I did, since I only discovered the meaning for that term yesterday. Funny how those things happen.

Sounds to me like you've created some AWESOME characters! I'm excited to learn more about all of them as I keep reading, especially Aria! I love her quick response to Alfie! I've always had a fondness for witty characters.

I really sympathize with Aria. It must be difficult to come from a family with all of this expectation around her to act like she believes in the Sacred Eight. Speaking of which, I really appreciate the detail you put into this story. It's stuff like that that really gives the story quality texture. It's always nice when an author does research for their fics.

I've had a taste of your story and now I need more! I'm honestly having trouble sitting still to write a review but I really do feel like you deserve my patience. Gosh, such a nice first chapter! This writing style is F A N T A S T I C, so if you're still worrying about at all, well, you really shouldn't be! I might've already said it but I'll say it again, fabulous work!

Author's Response: I'm so so grateful to be able to wake up to a lovely long review like this one, so thank you so much for that, it honestly makes my day. I'm really pleased that you love it and want to read more!
I'm glad you knew what 'sonder' means because I'm also that nerd that Googles thing like 'the most beautiful words in the English language' so I have a little arsenal of pretty words stored up and ready to use :)
I really hope that you continue to enjoy the characters, I didn't want to make Aria your sort of usual strong main character, I wanted her to be flawed and a little atypical because I always feel like they're the most interesting types of characters.
As for things like the Scared Eight I did do a little research and I'm really happy that you acknowledged that so thank you! I was originally just going to keep it as the Sacred Twenty-Eight but I thought that after the wizarding wars and reformed views, it would be unrealistic for me to keep it that high.
I know I've already said this but I'm honestly so grateful that you took the time to sit and write this review because it really makes me happy and inspires me to go back to this story (I haven't given up on it, I'm just working on another at the minutes which I haven't posted yet) but after this review I think I'm going to go back and add some more to this :) I always feel like the writing style won't come across quite right so it's great to hear that you like it.
Also, I've actually been rewriting this fic and have only gotten up to chapter three so far, so if chapters four and five aren't quite as good as the first few I apologise but I will be improving them. Especially chapter five, I'm pretty conflicted about that one I feel like everything happened too fast and it should have been like chapter seven but yeah...
But that's enough of my rambling so once again THANK YOU, and I hope you enjoy the following chapters just as much.


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Review #7, by Lauren Anxiety Rising

2nd June 2017:
OH MY GOD. I found your story today and I'm obsessed!!! I need the next chapter like I need air to breathe

Author's Response: Aw I'm so glad you love it, Thank you! Breathing is pretty important so, if you need it that much, I should probably get a move on with the next chapter ahah.

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Review #8, by Ash Anxiety Rising

9th May 2017:
I really liked this chapter!
Can't wait for the next one :)

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying it, working on more at the minute :)

~ Charlie ~


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Review #9, by BBHP Anxiety Rising

14th April 2017:
So. So. So good. I loved this so much. Everything about it. Keep it coming.

Author's Response: Ahh thank you so much, it makes me really happy when people enjoy my fics and leave reviews. I'm rewriting past chapters as I can see so many improvements that need making but once that's over I'll be sure to upload more.

~ Charlie ~


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Review #10, by Violet Potter 434 Anxiety Rising

13th April 2017:
this is great so far

cant wait for more so you'd better write quickly
from me xx

Author's Response: Aw thank you for the review, hopefully I don't take too long to write ahah, it depends how motivated I am. Right now I'm rewriting past chapters as I can see so many improvements that need making but once that's over I'll be sure to upload more.

~ Charlie ~


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Review #11, by blackzero Anxiety Rising

24th March 2017:
Superb...it will.be brother against brother for a Rosier.Superb story.I just pray you finish it like the awesome first five chapters

Author's Response: Maybe, maybe not. We will have to wait and see ;)
I'm glad you're enjoying it and don't worry, I have no intention of giving up on it, I'm actually going back and rewriting the prior chapters (a rewrite of chapter one has just gone up) as I felt the writing could be improved and I'm adding a few extra scenes here and there. As soon as that's done however, new chapters will be out.
Thank you for the review,

~ Charlie ~


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Review #12, by LittleMissAutumn Anxiety Rising

19th March 2017:
This chapter was pure brilliance. I loved the conversation between the two portraits! Of course they have nothing else to do but gossip and banter. Aria is such a refreshing character too. She's not a stereotype or cliche, she has a legitimate personality with real problems. Her and Albus are adorable together as friends and Aria needs to have more friends. Her and Zoey are fantastic (obviously) but she needs to know that she has a support group and I think Al can offer that too her. Maybe she'll become closer with Scorpius too because he'll understand her current state more so than the others. Alfie is such a creep!!! I don't trust him. He would love to drag her name through the mud if he got the chance. And the Yaxley girl! What if she tells her brother Clio though and he stays silent during the meeting? He seems nicer than his girlfriend but I could be wrong. I think the idea of the cards is really cool.

I love what you're doing with this story so far! Aria's panic attack made me want to cry and is completely understandable. The Sacred Eight would slaughter her and her mother would cover her face from the family tree with ash if she ever found out. I'm worried about them finding out and doing something to Zoey. Oh! And James! How can I forget about James? He was sweet to help her and to try and calm her down. He really isn't as bad of a guy as Aria thinks even though his ego is huge. You know he loves his family and cares for his friends. I'm excited to see where their relationship is going to go.

Update soon please!! :)

Author's Response: THANK YOU SO MUCH! After sitting through a double history lesson, spending an hour pretending that I actually understand biology (Cyclic phosphorylation anyone? I have no clue) and just dealing with the general A-Level stress, this review really made my day. I'm pretty sure this is the second time you've reviewed so I'm so happy you're continuing to enjoy Aria's little adventures, or lack there of if I'm being honest, all she's done is got on a train gone to lessons and had a rather unfortunate prefect round but alas, things shall hopefully pick up soon ;)
I can't tell you how pleased I am to hear that you think Aria is a refreshing character because, with fanfiction, it's so easy to fall into stereotypes (I totally went for the whole 'James the idiot' cliche). She does have fears and genuine problems which people often don't understand, although James may be able to associate with some more than she may realise. As for her friendship with Albus, I agree she does need more friends, she isolates herself from people out of fear of prejudice but she needs people like Al who is just a genuinely good person (I know he's a fictional character but I just want to hug him okay) and he just likes people for who they are. He's good at reading people and could tell that she needed someone (even if she didn't realise it herself) so I'm excited for you to see their friendship blossom.
Oh Alfie, don't get me started on that idiot, but he will continue to stick his nose (or abs) where it's not wanted.
The Yaxleys, like most of The Sacred Eight, are a handful and drama shall ensue. After all the pressure and expectations Aria has had to deal with, I'm surprised she hasn't broken down sooner but it all came crashing down in this panic attack that she sees as a moment of weakness (I would like to clarify that having panic attacks or anxiety does not make people weak in the slightest, that's just the way Aria see's it unfortunately).
As for updates, I'm actually going back and editing each chapter, rewording to improve the writing and adding extra little scenes in at the moment so if a few added bits would interest you they'll be up in the near future (I've nearly finished rewriting chapter one so that should be up sometime this week). I'm also working on a new story that's better written than this (though that's not saying much as I'm certainly not the greatest writer ahah) which is centred around Al, Scorpius and an OC going to a magical school of espionage (like Hogwarts for spies) because I felt I needed a few more adolescent wizarding spies in my life (this is beginning to sound like a self promo which is not my intention so I'll stop). But once chapter one of that is uploaded and I've finished rewording past chapters, I will continue to write new chapters for this :)
Wow this has gotten so long.
Anyways, I've rambled but I felt like such a lovely long review deserved an equally long reply. THANK YOU.

~ Charlie ~



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Review #13, by Ellyn Rose The Sacred Eight

11th February 2017:
I loved the beginning of this story! Such excellent writing and really lovely hook/hint as for what's to come. Also I love the premise of this plot--the sacred eight was a brilliant touch. off for more!! (also, your summary and cover are beautiful and definitely sucked me in...) excellent stuff!

Author's Response: Aw thank you so much, I'm pleased that you like it and my writing because I was worried about it. As for the Sacred Eight, you haven't seen the last of them so I hope you continue to enjoy it! I'm totally in love with the banner too ahah (all credit goes to Wildest.dreams/TDA for that one)

~ Charlie ~


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Review #14, by Strawberries202 Anxiety Rising

15th January 2017:
I love the characters so far! Aria is so complex, but I like that about her, it's more relatable for me that way. I'm looking forward to how the story continues to grow and develop. And don't worry about the story, I like it the way it is. It's serious, which I like, but it does make me wonder what will happen to Aria when the Sacred Eight find out about how she really isn't like them. And how the general population of Hogwarts will react to her being a Rosier.

Best of Luck!

-MK

Author's Response: Thank you, it's nice to hear you love them and Aria. I'm so glad you think she's complex because I really didn't want her to come across as two dimensional as there are quite a few sides to her though not in a two faced sort of way, more down to the fact that she has to act differently around different people. Things will certainly get hard for her when James finds out she's a Rosier and when Keres and Co find out she's not like them. I hope you stick around to see it all go down, thanks for the review!

~ Charlie ~


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Review #15, by adorably cute Anxiety Rising

9th January 2017:
Oh this is so good! Just read this all, loving it so far!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm really pleased that you love it, and I hope you continue to :)

~ Charlie ~


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Review #16, by luna1306 Anxiety Rising

9th January 2017:
No aria don't do it you're just going to get in trouble!
It's not worth it, she should stay away from Potter but yeah what fun would that be for the story?

Update soon

Author's Response: Aria certainly has a knack for getting herself into less than desirable situations and hey, who doesn't love a good story where all the wrong decisions are made you're right ahah. I'm already writing the next chapter as we speak, well type.
Thank you!

~ Charlie ~


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Review #17, by luna1306 Of Cauldrons And Conundrums

8th January 2017:
Great story!

I really need to know what the numbers mean!!
I love that you use all these fancy words it makes me feel very intelligent even though I have no idea what they mean.

Update soon please!

Author's Response: Don't worry, the next chapter is already in the queue waiting to be validated so should be up within the next 24 hours and you get to find out about the numbers :)
I'm glad you love the pretty words because I do too, especially the colour names ahah.

Thank you for leaving a review and I hope you continue to enjoy Aria's adventures,

~ Charlie ~


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Review #18, by bella_heath Of Cauldrons And Conundrums

3rd January 2017:
This story is really enjoyable, I like how you've written Aria. Ravenclaws are my favourite ;)

Look forward to seeing how the story progresses and the mystery of the numbers...eerie!

Author's Response: I'm happy to hear that you're enjoying it and that you like Aria's character, and thank you for the review!
Yey for Ravenclaws! I'm actually a Gryffindor but, personally, I find the other houses more fun to write about (because then they're not around James & Co constantly).
You'll find out about the numbers in the next chapter which should be put in the queue within the next few days :)

~ Charlie ~


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Review #19, by shewhomustnotbenamed_ Of Cauldrons And Conundrums

3rd January 2017:
Really enjoying this story. I like arias personality and her sarcasm is great.

Author's Response: I'm glad to hear that you like both the story and Aria woo! She can be very sarcastic when she wants to be ahah.
Thanks for the review and I hope you continue to enjoy future chapters :)

~ Charlie ~


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Review #20, by Kristina1990 Raindrops Falling

20th December 2016:
Ha! I like it :). It's perfect, filler or not :D.

Author's Response: Thank you, I'm glad!

~ Charlie ~


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Review #21, by Kristina1990 Of Cauldrons And Conundrums

19th December 2016:
“If only you were to put as much effort into your punctuality as you do flirting with these girls here then maybe you would actually make it to your lessons on time."

I like this guy.

“Do you know me,” he repeated, “and by that I don't mean did you read one of those pathetic Witch Weekly articles or follow me around everywhere I go like those fourth years seem to, I mean do you really actually know me.”

Very fair point.

“So you admit that I'm talented?” he called after me.

Looks like he always needs to have the final word.

I really liked this chapter. I figured out again why I never wanted to share a dorm with four other people (I would be Zoey) ;).

Author's Response: I didn't intentionally plan on having any overly sarcastic teachers, but as I wrote he just kind of appeared and I'm rolling with it, I like him ahah.
Neither of them really know the other, they just have a lot of prejudiced views which really need sorting out but he certainly has to have the last word, that's just James :)
See I'd be the opposite, I would wake up at the crack of dawn and be bored for like two hours whilst everyone else is sleeping ahah.
Thank you for another review and I hope you continue to enjoy!

~ Charlie ~


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Review #22, by Lady G Of Cauldrons And Conundrums

18th December 2016:
Oh, James, really? Bubotober pus? *sigh* I hope you had the decency to apologize to Verity since she had nothing to do with what happened. :/

I really appreciated your response to my review from the last chapter, and it's going to be interesting to see James reveal his true self, and I hope that's what Lily was alluding to a bit when she talked to Aria? With the whole "..the high horse he keeps insisting sitting on", like she's leaving clues that her big brother isn't what really what he wants strangers to see.

I'm glad James and Aria actually had a conversation, and hopefully Aria can remember some of his words about how she doesn't really know him (even if James of course couldn't let go of the facade all together), something I hope James can remember if there's a conflict between them-- he doesn't know Aria either. Aaand I'm guessing James has access to his father's copy of Advanced Potion Making? Or he's just ace at potions, that's also an option!

Now, I don't know if it's a mistake or just how you want it to be-- and I feel a bit bad pointing this out, but I'm a stickler for canon ages, lol-- but if James is in his 6th year then Lily can't be fourteen, since she's 4 years below James (2 years below Albus (starts Hogwarts in 2017) who is 2 years below James, who started 2015). Even if you made Albus a 5th year (I can't remember), Lily should be thirteen, unless her birthday was September 1st, of course.

Author's Response: Yeah, bubotuber pus, a bit of a low blow though he can do better. Although it's not seen in the chapter, he does apologise to Verity and it will probably be mentioned in passing in the future. We both know that he's a nicer person than he lets on which is why he is still with Chelsea despite having no romantic feelings towards her. It's not his intention to lead her on, not in the slightest, but he's more annoyed at Aria for her sake rather than his own as he doesn't think Chelsea deserves this.
Lily is smart, and somewhat mysterious. She leaves Aria with more questions than she answers.
They did finally have a conversation woo, although they still have a lot of prejudices towards each other and argue for the sake of arguing. The Half Blood Prince's potion book may have something to do with his skill ;)
No it's not a mistake ahah, and don't feel bad in the slightest! If you ever have anything negative to say feel free, constructive criticism is helpful!
Since I changed the ages and years up I should probably clarify:
James - 6th year | 16 years old.
Albus - 5th year | 15 years old.
Lily - 4th year | 14 years old.
Like you said there should be two years between each but I made it one year. I was originally going to keep their canon ages because I much prefer to if I can but that would make Lily twelve and I wanted to have this sort of mysterious, omniscient and an almost slightly intimidating (not in a cruel way though) air to her and I couldn't get that across from a twelve year old.
But yes, I'm sorry I hope it doesn't bother you too much.
Thanks for leaving another review!

~ Charlie ~


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Review #23, by LittleMissAutumn Raindrops Falling

16th December 2016:
I really like your story so far! You have great writing and I love your use of pretty words! This reads more like a book than a fanfic story and I'm loving it. Aria is me, OMG. We have the same personality haha but trouble is brewing! Her mother is horrid and I'm sure some obstacles are going to come up the more she interacts with the Potters. I'm excited to see how James will react when she starts patrolling with Albus! I hope they become friends. Update soon please. :)

Author's Response: Thank you for reading and leaving a review! I really do have a love of pretty words so I'm glad you feel the same ahah. It honestly means so much that you like my writing style as I'm always scared that it won't come across quite right or it will read weirdly, so the fact that it reads more like a book to you makes me happy.
Oh and trouble is most certainly brewing for her, she just wanted to stay under the radar but life apparently doesn't agree with that plan. I'm excited for you to properly meet Albus (probably in chapter 5, so not too long away) and I also hope you like him, he's going to have his own little story line.
As for the update, you are in luck! I just finished chapter four last night and uploaded it so it will probably be validated and available to read within a day or two. I think it went a lot better than this chapter (which I wasn't very happy with) as a lot more happens so I hope you like it :)

~ Charlie ~


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Review #24, by PaulaTheProkaryote Hate At First Sight

11th December 2016:
HELLO AGAIN OLD FRIEND!

Okay, I've left you a grand total of one review so old friend might be a little much, but I'm back! I'm stuck in grad school and I'm mostly around on other sites so when I came back tonight I knew I'd have to swing by!

Also you mentioned River Song and YES I LOVE DOCTOR WHO AND I'M SO GLAD YOU MENTIONED MY TRUE LOVE IN THIS CHAPTER.

There you go again with these amazingly descriptive introductory paragraphs that manage to set the scene in such a way that I'm completely sucked in.

I like the fact that it didn't take Molly long to realize she didn't even half way care about the blood purity nonsense. I also like the fact that she was vigilant enough to originally keep an eye on her. It's just another one of those repercussions of war, I suppose! Clio Yaxley sounds like bad news even though she's not too bad apparently. The name Clio just makes me suspicious. It's the name of a very mean girl or a very small dog and I'm not crazy about either.

It hurts my little heart that she can't just be openly friendly (here's to hoping though).

Whoops, I spoke too soon. Ignore Clio, Keres is a monster.

She's a nosey little snot. ALBUS POTTER LOVE OF MY LIFE.

Lowkey kinda super hate James right now. He's skeevy. If he's meant to win over Aria he has a lot of work left! Although I do like the challenge! I loved, loved, loved her dealing with his shenanigans by throwing him into it head on (rather literally). I'm afraid that's just going to pique his interest!

I really liked meeting Zoey too! She's going to be a really good addition to the cast!

Without going on my usual spiel about flow and characterization and blah blah blah (which you nailed all of it), I'll just end this by saying I really enjoyed the chapter and I can't wait to read the next one (even if it's the middle of the night here and I have to be up in a few hours)

Author's Response: PAULA YOU'RE BACK!
(Well I'm assuming that's your name ahah)
Your last review really made me smile so I was so happy when I saw you'd left this one :)
YES DOCTOR WHO WOO, I literally grew up with that show and was really hoping you'd get the reference.
But that's enough of my fangirling, so Molly..
She's a very independent person and likes to formulate all her own opinions rather than believing whatever anyone else says so yes she was weary at first (which she probably should be really) but she is also an accepting person.
And as for Aria she really isn't the very open type bless her soul, Zoey is only person she has ever opened up to, though she is heading in that direction with Molly. As you will see in the coming chapters she's also friendly with her dorm mates and one of Zoey's friends called Aiden, but in his case it's less out of choice, more because he's an overly friendly person who doesn't quite understand the concept of personal space. Despite her being sociable with them all, she doesn't really consider them her friends (although they are, she just doesn't realise it yet) more like classmates who she never opens up to.
Keres is a monster yep.
AND YES YOU LOVE ALBUS, he deserves more appreciation in the next gen universe. If two of your true loves are Albus and Doctor Who then I'm starting to like you more by the second ahah. He's going to have his own story line woven throughout this fic so I hope you like it, I couldn't not give him one.
As for James I agree with 'skeevy' being a good word to describe him so I guess we will see how this one pans out. And you're right, all she's done is sparked both James and Alfie's interest.
I feel like seeing as Aria is so closed off and negative she needed someone to balance all of that out and thus Zoey was born, the complete opposite of Aria (bar their shared love of sarcasm). I hope you continue to like her :)
I'm happy that you thought it flowed nicely because I think that's quite important in a story so wooo thanks!
In case you haven't read chapter three already, I apologise. It's very much just a filler and however many times I rewrote it, it just didn't work. I am, however, almost finished chapter 4 which has gone a lot better so hopefully that will make up for it.

Thanks so much for this lovely review,
~ Charlie ~

(P.S. you get to properly meet Albus in chapter 5)
(P.P.S. Keres too)


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Review #25, by putitonpaper Raindrops Falling

2nd December 2016:
Ah, don't sell this chapter short! I liked this chapter because it gives a window into Aria's thinking and how she interacts with people who aren't her friends or "enemies." Looking forward to how this story progresses!

Author's Response: Aw I'm really pleased that you actually like this chapter, I felt like not much happened and the story didn't really progress but more goes on in the next chapter wooo. I'm about two thirds of the way through writing it so it should be up soon!
Thank you for reviewing again, I really appreciate it.

~ Charlie ~


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