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Reading Reviews for Darkness Rising
  
15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by sushmita Malfoy at Odds

17th May 2017:
Scheming and more scheming, looking forward to the next chapter. I also find it odd that Dumbledore is thinking about Malfoy's missing wand.
Grammatically, I think I'd like to see your sentences a lil more crisper and shorter if possible.
Typos " like have never had
is going difficult
idea than he was"

Author's Response: Actually, He was more interested in what Tom was up to and what part Molly was going to have in the situation. I don't recall him actually thinking about the wand, just the intensity that Tom had when he was looking at the girl.

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Review #2, by Sushmita Tom in the Midst

4th May 2017:
I think I saw a typo in the chapter summary for this one on the first page "but canTom "

I definitely enjoyed the lesson they had with Dumbledore and the predicament Malfoy gets into.

Author's Response: I had more than a few laughs myself as I read and reread what I had planned for Abraxas.

Thanks again for the many wonderful reviews and the heads up on the typos (which I correct as swiftly as I can)!


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Review #3, by Sushmita Malfoy at a Loss

4th May 2017:
The previous chapter I found the bits of them just reading or writing a bit boring and wanted more from the story and their lessons. This chapter was definitely more exciting with the flying lesson. Can't wait to read more on the manipulative Tom. I wonder if Tom will continue to hold on to Molly for a few years just for her money and influential family? This is a different side of Tom we see who seems to care or atleast need someone kind by his side, but probably not for long. I wouldn't be surprised if he kills Molly in the future.

Few typos "that been sent
a boy-bind
and them thrown
more than little capable"

Author's Response: School for them is just as boring as it is for us Muggles I assume. Molly's fate has already been decided but won't be revealed for a while (definitely not in this story). I doubt that Tom really cares about money, as his previous tendencies bear out, I believe that he would be much more interested in the influence that her family wields (although we're talking about the future Voldemort here and someone with influence isn't always the safest with him.)

Thanks for the heads up on the typos


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Review #4, by Sushmita Tom in the Midst

4th May 2017:
Seems a bit harsh for Thomas Cowell to be facing charges from ministry for a fight on Hogwarts grounds though, specially if he moved on to Durmstrang as u mentioned.

Author's Response: I think that what I meant was that charges were possible pending an investigation into the attack that he made on another student. It may not have been entirely clear and I shall have to go back and check things out.

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Review #5, by Sushmita Plots and Unexpected Results

4th May 2017:
Nice plot!
Typos "He does he have
all that you
which one that he would"
"after meeting with Professor Dippet" - I think u meant the other prof

I'm surprised Tom Riddle is in his dorm as he was supposed to be in isolation as well from his punishment before the hols, or u could just remove references of it entirely from the previous chapter as well.
I'm surprised the students at such a young age know how to obliviate or even control other students' actions. I wonder if its based on a time where the rules of the ministry of magic were not as strong on what can/cannot be done, or maybe the restricted books in library were not as restrictive?

Author's Response: Thanks again for the heads up and suggestions. I will be going over this chapter again as it get to it (printers are wonderful, I can go back with your comments to see what you spotted) ;)

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Review #6, by Sushmita Molly

3rd May 2017:
Some typos "Tom was fool
kissing the older
after he had rejected"

Author's Response: Thanks for the very kind reviews!

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Review #7, by Sushmita Condemnation

3rd May 2017:
Loved this chapter and the events that led to the ministry discovering what Tom was upto. :)
Small typo "A bit if ".
I'm looking forward to your subsequent sequels as well on how Hagrid and Moaning Myrtle make Tom's acquaintance at some point and the events that change their future. This story has a really good flow to it right now and I liked the idea of him coming back to the orphanage for the holiday break.

Author's Response: Oops! I already answered your comment about Moaning Myrtle and Hagrid when I responded to another of your reviews. They really haven't been given much thought yet, but will when the time comes to kill off Myrtle (and we all know Hagrid's involvement in that situation.

Dumbledore had told Mrs. Cole that the boy would be returning at break time (I know he meant summer break, but the holidays seemed like a logical extension.)


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Review #8, by Sushmita Conflict and Catastrophe

3rd May 2017:
Molly moved on pretty fast, oops! Tom seems super mad about it.

Typos "yet an as
to fell the
began to the journey
nearly to his "

Author's Response: She never really moved on (just used a ploy to make Tom jealous, which isn't a smart thing to do).

Like a bad habit that you can never seem to be rid of, Tom shall reappear in her life repeatedly.


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Review #9, by Sushmita A Growing Void

3rd May 2017:
It does seem a little too much that Molly cries because of detention, but could it be due to the added fact that she already has a lot on her mind about her relationship going bad. I'm also surprised Dumbledore didnt explicitly tell them to stay behind if he was angry, but they still did.
Errors "mere motioned"," something attempting" - someone, "just how large a mistake you have just made"

Author's Response: Molly is a sensitive soul that just wants to fit in. Tom has already done a bit of damage to her at this point.

I think that Molly WOULD have stayed behind and Tom just did so to save face with the girl that he still needed.


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Review #10, by Sushmita Plans Carried Out

3rd May 2017:
Love reading about Dumbledore's sixth sense, and its great to read about the slow rise in power of Tom Riddle in Hogwarts to start with.
Here are some typos/errors to look through
"Should you decide to I will take stronger measures.
had gotten had gotten
was not to make it.
turned her bury her head
using it experience something"

Author's Response: Thanks for another great review. Sorry that I haven't gotten back to you about your other responses, I'm taking care of grandchildren while their mother is in the hospital with new sibling.

I intend to visit those typos as soon as I have posted this response.

Thanks again and I'm glad that you appear to be enjoying the stories.


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Review #11, by Sushmita Is This Love?

2nd May 2017:
Their love is quite sweet and I was hoping like Dumbledore that Molly could redeem him but looks like that wont happen. Tom enjoys his power and manipulative skills too much. He would never fit in Hufflepuff in any case with all that ambition and power hunger in him. Concept of isolation towers is new as opposed to detention. Maybe Dumbledore changed some things after he became Headmaster.
Typos - "something could
pair was separated
boy met but"

Author's Response: Tom is a multi-faceted character that is incredibly fun to write (you never know which way he shall turn). I wanted him to have a love interest to humanize him but we all know that it shall never work out. He is far more interested in his ambitions than he is in the girl (she is just a tool to be used to get what he wants).

Perhaps if you look at his history (even before his conception) you would realize that he was fated to become what he was. Unloving and unlovable, a perfect storm for the sociopath that he became.


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Review #12, by Sushmita Questioned Innocence

2nd May 2017:
It seems weird that Dumbledore would be thinking about this incident and pin it down to Tom though being responsible for it. Unless he spent a moment to look at Tom's eyes and read his thoughts as well. Typically that's Dumbledore's style.
Typos "think that we are going to
the pair of fellow Slytherin"

Author's Response: Dumbledore always suspected Tom, that much we know from the books (Dumbledore's conversation with Harry after viewing the memories in the Pensieve). I think that he always kept an eye on Tom after that especially after the boy came to Hogwarts where it was easier to manage things.

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Review #13, by Sushmita Plans in the Making

2nd May 2017:
Nice chapter on their first day of school. Its interesting to see Tom wield the same type of magical power over his fellow students as he did with muggles, just shows how gifted he is if even the professors don't see it right away.
Typos "get out your quills
busily copying
had to chance
until that time that
Billy was really easy to make do what I want
that he had yet"

Author's Response: Ah, the first day of school! Something that we all experience.

Old habits die hard and Tom is far too used to using what he can do to get what he wants. The professors, with the possible exception of Dumbledore, aren't looking for it yet.

I guess I have some work to do correcting those typos, back to school for me!


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Review #14, by Sushmita A Changing Life

2nd May 2017:
Its always great to go back to Hogwarts from a first year's perspective. Would have been interesting if the hat had taken sometime to think about what other house he could have placed in and then corrected himself. The added suspense in Tom's mind would have been fun.
Is this a typo "desireto" or is it meant to be that way becoz its part of an older English laguage poem, since its coming from the hat?

Author's Response: You have insight into my thoughts (unregistered legilimens?), yes, the hat often uses older terms. Since it's a relic from the founding I often believe that older language is appropriate.

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Review #15, by Sushmita A Tale of Two Alleys

2nd May 2017:
This was a perfect first chapter through the eyes of a young Tom Riddle! Loved the part of him choosing his wand. I'm surprised he went on this adventure all alone.
Small typo here "amazed as she stepped"

Author's Response: I tried to put myself in Tom's shoes (having visited the Diagon Alley attraction in Orlando, Florida) to set the stage for this chapter. The wand choosing him was the easiest part of the whole thing.

Actually, I thought him wanting to go it alone was pure Tom. He has had to grow up very quickly as an orphan and would also (at this age) want to prove his independence.

Thanks again for the reviews. The latest chapter is in the process of being written and should be up soon.


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