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Hi there Aph!

I'm here for the October BvB!  Wow - you can really do angst!  I think you've taken Remus's brooding to a whole new level!  However, as usual, your talent with characterization is spot on.  <i>This</i> is the Remus we know from the books.  He was always feeling very down about his condition and how it affected the ones he loved.  Under that guise, he also lamented  how the condition took him <i>away</i> from the ones he loved, too.  It's a complicated chain reaction and you've made the two dance a complicated rhythm with your prose and description.  I find myself agonizing along with Remus, but also desperate for a moment of reprieve from his torment.  

I also think you hit the "Angsty boys like angsty boys" prompt right on the head.  The way you used Regulus and Lily (and James and Peter to a lesser extent) to tell us about how incredibly difficult Sirius can be, I can hardly blame Remus for his mixed feelings toward him!  

I also love the way you intwined the war into the story.  We can hardly write a Marauder's era fic without mentioning the turmoil that was going on around them.  In another time, another place, those four would've been branded as unruly teenagers, but the happenings of their time forced them to grow up before they were ready — even Remus.  His condition automatically forced him to deal with responsibilities beyond his years, but war does not discriminate in such a way.  Remus used it to alienate himself even further.

Admittedly, I thought the title of this fic had to do with the calendar.  I even looked up that the Julian calendar replaced the Lunar one, and I thought it was a fitting title for that reason.  However, I feel a bit silly after reading your author's note - haha.  

Beautiful writing, as always!

&hearts; Beth

Author Response

Hi Aph!

So I'm here because I'm a sucker for Wolfstar, but beyond that I'm a sucker for stories that explore the darker, grittier parts of the relationship. I saw that this was for the Angsty Boys Love Angsty Boys challenge, so of course I had to read it!

There's just. So much to say about this, because you did so much just within this one-shot. First of all, I really think you captured Remus /perfectly/ - all the bitterness and suppressed anger and resentment that a lot of writers seem to ignore is here at the surface, and handled really really well. He's still so recognizable as Remus, even though we never quite see him like this in canon. It's just all realistic and beyond that, so beautifully executed.

Sirius is far and away my favourite HP character, but you really captured some of the... well, less favourable aspects of his personality. I can't say I agree with /every single thing/ that was said about him - although everything that was said made sense as something that Remus would think about him during this time period - but I did agree with a lot, which is saying something because I'm very picky about his characterization.

What you did with Regulus was amazing - so unique, so well-executed. In most other stories that would have me very taken-aback, but you pulled it off beautifully. So kudos for that!

And finally, as I already mentioned, your actual writing was absolutely stunning. Just poetic enough to elevate the story without making it overly flowery, full of wonderful metaphors - honestly fantastic.

I could keep going on and on about the things I loved about this, but sadly I need to get to bed now :( But brava - you did an amazing job with this piece!

-Kayla

Author Response

Hey Laura! First off, I’d like to thank you for entering my challenge, and tell you how much I loved your story.

I love how vivid your stories always are, they pull me in and refuse to let me go, they are always interesting and full of shadows. Sometimes I have to read them a few times before I even get it. Fewf, they make me feel like an actual intellectual. I actually love how lost I get in your worlds.

I can never write long review for your stories, because they leave me bone-chilled and wordless, searching the answers. Julie’s (Banshee), Jill’s (Dreamgazer202), and yours, three stories that are so intricately crafted and written with immense care. To be as good as you three are, you have to really love it. Your passion pours through the words you write.

The way you write Remus’s thoughts is so insightful, even in third person. I can really see what’s going on in his head. I love how interesting the bits that deal with his being a werewolf are. 

I also really liked the little moments that talked about James and Peter. It was almost fun, like meeting up with old friends.

Oooh some Regulus I see… 

“Snape him danger, for putting him in danger” I’m pretty sure that’s a typo, but I’m not sure how to describe it so I’ll leave that up to you.

The advice (well, I wouldn’t call it advice *chuckles*, anyway the things that Regulus tells Remus), is quite accurate/good. God that’s hard to describe. But really this was a moment that intrigued me. 

The end is very powerful, and you had a very strong finish. It was as if you’d just finished an incredibly hard marathon and then in five minutes you were ready for another.

I congratulate you, and wish you the best of luck (not that you need it) in future stories, and in this challenge. This was brilliant! You hit the angst spot on.

Yours sincerely,
ImaRavenclaw

Author Response

Well, you had me at the second line. Alone as innately comforting, safe, and bitterly sweet? Yup. That's me. 

You've done a wonderful job with Remus-- you have nothing to be afraid of there! The paragraph where he talks about all these things "in case"-- the details he worries about constantly, that felt so right. Especially because it feels like there's this other layer to the worries, in the reader's head, at least: as with most forms of self-consciousness, we know that most people <i>wouldn't</i> notice all the things he's worrying about, but there's no way to convince him of that.

And his longing for a bit of understanding, and his need for reassurance that he isn't being needlessly self-centered-- that sounds so much like Remus as well. I loved watching him rationalize his return, how he needs to go back if only because he owes everything to the people who made him feel welcome once upon a time. Poor Remus-- he's so wrapped up in his own head, he can't see that being made to feel welcome is something we owe to everyone, that it's not a gift to be repaid with your own life!

It's not only that you captured Remus, though. It's that I felt like this was a stunning and stark portrait of all the Marauders. We Harry Potter fans love to hold them up as the finest group of men Hogwarts ever saw, tricksters with flaws who eventually grew into brave and honorable young men (aside from Peter, of course). And yet your image, of Remus and Sirius clashing, feels so much more real. Of course the quiet, self-conscious one would have issues with the brazen, confident one. Of course it would kill James to see it happen. The line about James-- "James had, in a way, out-grown them all, wise enough to know he didn’t want to die, wise enough to know he might do, no matter what happened"-- was just brilliant. As soon as I read it, I felt it had to be true.

I just need to say it-- the last line is perfect. Not just for the content, which is perfect on its own, and not just for the fact that this long, beautiful reflective story ends in the exact moment when Remus transforms into a wold and temporarily loses all reflective abilities, but also for the rhythm of it, and the way it flows out of the second to last paragraph. I love it, I love it so much. There's so much going on and it all works. Don't touch that when you edit!

As for your question about the lack of plot, I really don't think it's an issue. Yes, we're sitting in Remus' head a lot, but the slight jumps in time marked by line breaks help quite a bit. And the fact that he's thinking back to past events, which lets readers reconstruct everything with him, is also helpful. I love the moment when he begins to think about the incident with Sirius and Snape, simply because it brings a canon event to the surface and shifts the conversation in a familiar direction. And of course, Remus' nerves about his transformation, plus the martyrdom thread, tie the whole thing together, so it feels absolutely complete.

I can't read a story of yours without taking a moment to mention how beautiful your writing is. I have to admit, I'm a firm believer in writing that gets to the point, and I usually stick to reading things with styles that may still be lovely and creative and even experimental, but that are straightforward above all else. I was a little worried that I'd have a hard time with this story just because you have such an eye for language and that's not what I gravitate toward. But I'm pleased to say there were no issues! Your writing is incredibly detailed and imaginative but never superfluous. I'm seriously glad I was able to dive in and enjoy. 

A note about the Remus/Sirius aspect-- it really was Remus/Sirius? I feel like I saw you mention somewhere that your relationships are heavily implied, so maybe that applies to this as well. Or maybe I never saw that. Either way, I find it fascinating that you characterize the story this way. Of course a lot of people have trouble expressing certain feelings and it comes out as anger or squabbling when really what they feel is affection, I get that. But still, I almost wonder if I missed something! But, in fact, what I most feel I still don't understand is Regulus and Remus. I felt like they had a sly romantic vibe going. So maybe I'm right and they did... or maybe it's something else. I found that fascinating as well, regardless. 

I was a little surprised to learn that Remus reserves the cabin for two nights a month; for some reason, at the beginning, I assumed he was hiding out there long-term. I'm not sure if I missed something early on or not. But I could easily see him doing either.

This has been a really lovely story, Laura, and I'm thrilled I got to read it. You nailed Remus and you nailed the people around him. I love it!

- Sarah

Author Response

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