68 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Flower n Prongs Arrival at Hogwarts

12th March 2017:
Me again!

I was pretty sure that I knew the houses of Fred and Victoire, but it was nice to have it confirmed that I was right. I know you have a LOT of stories in this series so it would probably be obvious if I had read more of the other ones but as it stands, the confirmation was nice. I do appreciate that Victoire is not a stereotypical, stuck-up Ravenclaw or somebody obsessed with studying. The fact that you mention that at least one of her dorm mates also breaks the mould ("silly" is definitely not what most people would jump to when describing a 'Claw) is nice.

I know that they're cousins (duh) but it is nice to see an example of inter-house friendship in this story. I'm curious to where Micah and Lex fit into the houses, but since Fred and Victoire are in different houses it will fit anyway. One of the things that bothered me in canon was how so many people stuck strictly to their dorm mates, so I love a fic that deviates from that.

In a bit of a sappy way, I'm glad that Fred II has somebody he seems about as close to as Fred I. The super comfortable banter between them makes them seem almost like siblings rather than cousins.

Good luck with the Nargles! :)

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Review #2, by Flower n Prongs The Magical Menagerie

12th March 2017:
Even though they are now a couple decades out from the Second Wizarding War, it is nice to see that some of the paranoia and practices of the time have held up, like having lots of locks on your door. For somebody who grew up raised by his grandmother because of the war, it definitely seems appropriate.

I also just need to talk about how Teddy reminded me of Remus in here for a bit. Him being the sort of cool adult and the one that you could turn to was obviously something that was in large part due to his age, but paralleled Remus at times. His fascination with magical creatures also made me think of his dad. I'm glad that he doesn't have to worry about money though.

Victoire having second thoughts while in the menagerie, especially around the basilisk was a nice way to set her apart from a lot of her family members. I'm sure some of the stupidity we see in Harry, Ron, and the others could be attributed to age (12-year-olds were probably not really thinking things through) but it also makes Victoire seem - dare I say? - smarter than some of her other family members. At the very least, she is clearly less reckless and less of a stereotypical Weasley Gryffindor. Yes, Fred was also cautious but seemed less so than her.

Borrowing clothing was a nice hint towards their future relationship. Stealing jackets and sweaters is just the girlfriend thing to do, apparently even before you start dating.

Now I want to know if they will they run into George or somebody who will report back to him at WWW. I can't really see him getting *that* mad but, then again, he is now a guy well into his 30s and not some reckless teenager stealing maps.

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Review #3, by Flower n Prongs Missing the Train

12th March 2017:
Hello. Here to check out the story and Victoire for the Nargles. =)

Does missing the train run in families? Even if not, missing the train because they were distracted by a book that sounds suspiciously like something Gilderoy Lockhart would have written in his prime and sweets does sound like something a Weasley could get up to. The fact that Fred II would do that seems only natural, but having Victoire is one of those Weasleys is much more surprising. She is so often portrayed as a prissy girl or a younger version of her mother that this is a refreshing change.

I loved the "I'm an adult. "No, you're Teddy," exchange. Of course, he is technically an adult but in their minds, he is still the same guy that he has been for years. I'm assuming this is heading into Victoire's sixth year, so the hints that Teddy is already into her was a nice touch.

I also appreciate the fact that they think Ginny & Harry would be the best adults to go to in this situation. I suppose when Fred is your father, he might not be as excited about being a part of your fiasco. Ron would be another good bet, but perhaps not Hermione.

Onto chapter 2. :)

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Review #4, by my_voice_rising Missing the Train

30th December 2016:
Hi! I'm finally here for our swap! Thanks for being patient and I'm excited to start reading :)

You seem to know these characters so well! The banter between Victoire and Fred is very well done, and I like that they got into a sticky situation but aren't being portrayed as Weasley twins pranksters. It'd be fun to hear more about previous trouble they'd gotten themselves into, and what their parents' reactions were. They don't seem too terribly concerned but there definitely is a hint that some sort of punishment would be involved! I could see Fleur being pretty uptight about something like that.

Oooh, so there are going to be hints of Teddy and Victoire! (Or maybe more than hints?) You've been subtle in a very lovely way. I love that he calls her "V," and that there are more photos of her on his mantle than she expected. Her obliviousness is well crafted with the line about how he's "so odd sometimes." It's much more subtle than saying that she often caught him staring, etc., and I can see this being a very lovely slow burn.

I guess if I had any suggestions, it'd be to hear more about what the characters look like to you. We have the basic concepts, but things like their way of dress, hair style, etc. are good ways of explaining more about their characters. Just some more fleshing out in that way would be nice. I know that I like these characters, but right now there's not anything that gives a strong view of their personalities. They're friendly and bad at time management (Fred's watch was funny) but other than that I don't have a too terribly clear concept. Obviously more of that will come the further we read, though, and I'm sure we learn more about them very soon!

Thanks for the swap, and great work here!

♥ Sarah

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Review #5, by Aphoride Back to the Forest

5th January 2016:
Branwen! :D So I have a little bit of free time (maybe that's a lie, but ah well? :P) and I saw you in the BvB so I just had to jump on it and stop by this again, because I love this story so much - also, to kick you to update asap! ;)

Okay, so you know I love your characters - your Victoire and Fred are so, so great, and I know I'm repeating myself here but I can't really get over just how real they are. Like, their conversations and interactions are so true to life for best friends who are cousins/close relations, and it's so so great. It works so well with this story and it really makes a whole lot of the dynamic of this, with their relationship. Hehe, I actually laughed out loud when Victoire told Fred the thing about the smile - he's a closet romantic isn't he? :P Poor lamb! ;) But it is very sweet, and I like that you've swapped the general stereotype around - that the main girl is not super romantic, and the main guy is.

I love the world you're building in this, with the creatures and the backstories to the different species and how they work and the ways they communicate with people and so on. I haven't read too much of your stuff in this 'verse (though I've started Wrinkles) so I don't know if you do this all the way through it (though I imagine so ;)), but it's so so good and I love that kind of super in-depth detail and information. It's so so impressive! :)

I'm really curious to see what happens now Victoire has been given the comb and what else they find out about banshee's powers, and so on. I just love the lore you're building into it, and I'm really kinda scared to search it in case I find something, haha :P I'm so looking forward to (hopefully!) if/when she asks Goldstein about it, because he's such a great character - you really have this knack for everyone in a story, no matter how little time they have, being so well rounded, you know? - and what the staff in general will - and, of course, what the banshee will do other than float around mysteriously in the forest and gift random students her mother's possessions :P

As always, your writing is so lovely - it's so clear and clean and beautiful, and it flows so well. You write action so perfectly, with that right balance of description and dialogue and it's so so good :)

Looking forward to the next chapter already ;) (Soon, yes? Please? :P)

Aph xx

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Review #6, by Dirigible_Plums Missing the Train

22nd December 2015:

So I always saw this around and meant to read it. . . but somehow never go round to it? With the QTR event, I figured it was time for me to stop being so lazy and review this gem in the spirit of Christmas :)

I love Vic & Fred. You don't usually see them as a pair in Next Gen fics. Fred's usually James' best friend (I'm so guilty of this) while Vic is the older, somewhat cooler one. I've read so many different portrayals of her, some making her out to be a good girl, others not do flattering. But I like this Victoire.

Teddy, Teddy, Teddy. You so fancy her. Having more photos of her, rubbing the back of your neck. We see right through hour casual' demeanour, Mister. ;)

All in all it was a nice first chapter. Vic & Fred have well rounded personalities already - you can see the way they antagonise each other a little from the opening paragraphs where they insist it was the other persons' fault. I look forward to reading about them even more.

Happy holidays!

Plums xo

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Review #7, by ravenclaw_princess Missing the Train

10th December 2015:
Merry Christmas. Here is a gift for the Ravenclaw gift exchange.

You're a really talented writer and this chapter flowed so well. I was suddenly transported and at no point did I ever come out of the world that you'd created. Right from the first sentence, I was hooked.

I love all the witty banter between Vic and Fred. They play off each other so well and their banter is hilarious. The title of this story gives a bit of an indication of what craziness will ensue, and your first chapter really delivered.

They both seem pretty easy go lucky. Nothing phases them and they didn't panic. The plan went awry, but they had level heads and thought of a new plan which would see them get into the least trouble possible. Seemed like a pretty good plan actually. I laughed when they dodged away from their parents. These two sound like the biggest trouble makers ever.

Teddy is so cute. Its pretty obvious that he has a crush on Vic. They way his demeanor changed when Vic questioned him about the photographs gave it all away, and while subtle, its the small details like this which lift the level of the story and give so much depth to characters.

This is a very cool beginning to what I can tell will be a brilliant story. I'm definitely going to be back to see what other mischief these two create and hopefully see some more of Teddy and Vic.


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Review #8, by cherry_pop94 Back to the Forest

11th November 2015:
Woah! This was a great chapter!

Does the cousin thing have to do with the fact that Victoire is part veela? I think you're exploring a really cool part of the wizarding world here. That maybe magical creatures are created somehow and that there's some evolution there as well.

The way you describe banshees is absolutely chilling. They're really fascinating creatures I think, but very difficult to write about too, I'm sure. You've done a good job of conveying of creepy the banshee is, but at the same time, I'm not afraid of her.

I can't wait for the next chapter!


Author's Response: Aww, thank you! *hug* Yes, it does have to do with Victoire being part veela - you'll see in the next chapter that Fred does not emerge quite as unscathed from the banshee's touch.

In the longer term, this is actually going to play out as a fairly significant plot point in two other related stories set after Victoire leaves Hogwarts, so I'm really glad it came off well! I was so nervous about it, but it's been so much fun to brainstorm and map out.

Thank you! ♥

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Review #9, by cherry_pop94 Wasted Research

11th November 2015:
Hello Branwen! I'm here for Bvb!

It's been a while since I've read a chapter of this, but it's still fantastic and I really need to catch up! I'm so curious to know what the comb's all about and you've left this chapter on such a cliffhanger, I'll probably read on after leaving this review.

Anyway, this was a fun little chapter. Juliet and Fred are still annoying/cute, Victoire's morbidly curious and just such a great character, and I'm learning more about your Hogwarts headcanons! I totally agree, by the way, there has to be more than one potions dungeon and more than one potions master for the school to run...

Anyway, I'm so excited to read on now!


Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad that Juliet and Fred are coming off as fairly equal parts annoying and cute, because that's exactly what I'm going for - young love is nice for the people in it, but sometimes a little melodramatic and often nauseating for everyone else. :P

Thank you so much!

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Review #10, by Aphoride Wasted Research

8th November 2015:
Hey Branwen! :) Dropping by on this for BvB - I just had to stop back on this when I spotted you in it because I've missed this story, even though time to read and review has been short, so I'm taking this chance now ;)

So you know how much I love this story, but I think it says so much about how good you are as an author that even a chapter like this, where relatively (comparatively!) little happens in terms of plot and excitement, it still fills it out and I still love reading it. It's such a skill, to be able to make anything so interesting and engaging.

Also, though on the same lines, I love the characterisation you get through in this, and how it all develops - I love how Juliet is so easily excitable, and how we see more of Victoire's relationships with her friends and how they work. It's a lovely change from so much focus on Fred, and it really fills the story out so beautifully :) Plus, they're just such great characters - I love the differences in them all and how they're all so real - I know I've said this before, but it's true and it's something I always love :D

I'm so so curious with what's going on with the comb - the lack of information about it is seriously creepy, and makes the whole thing more creepy, you know, because there's just nothing... I'm so curious to know what she's going to do about it - if she is going to ask Goldstein and if she does what he's going to do/say about it. He doesn't seem like the type to just hand it over, without getting curious himself :P

I really, really, really want to read ahead - so you may see me back in a minute because I can't wait :P

This is an amazing story, as always! :D

Aph xx

Author's Response: Hey, Laura! Thank you so much - I know that this was a little bit of an action-lite chapter, and I'm glad it came across well regardless. Some of this is dealt with in the next chapter, but I don't think she's going to be able to avoid asking Goldstein forever, because there's not a lot written about it. (And, of course, it's much more amusing to write about than a book entry.) Thank you so much for your review! ♥

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Review #11, by Veritaserum27 Missing the Feast

14th October 2015:
Hello Branwen,

I'm here for the next chapter of our swap. And this can also count for the BvB review fest :)

I love the idea that Victoire wants to be an animagus. I take it that it's something that they don't allow students to attempt until they've achieved their N.E.W.T.s? I hope she goes through with it. I've never read a story about how someone learns to be an animagus!

I also liked the scene where Professor Goldstein is discussing Victoire's schedule with her. I'm very intrigued by these new classes at Howarts. I want to take them!!

This was the only part of the story that confused me.
“I thought you said you’d told our parents.”

“I lied.”

I went back and re-read the entire chapter twice and I couldn't find where Goldstein said that he'd told Victoire's and Fred's parents. The only reference to their parents is when the professors say they hadn't told them yet and when he was trying to decide exactly what to say to them.

And yay! Victoire is a Ravenclaw ('claws unite!) I never thought about that before, but it makes perfect sense. I always pictured Fleur as a very clever witch - so it makes sense that all her kids would be in Ravenclaw house. And a Ravenclaw troublemaker just sounds so much fun to read about.

I felt bad for the last part - pretty much everything Victoire predicted about Juliet and the other girls talking about Fred came true. And I don't think it's going to end there - but I really like that deep beneath her prank-pulling, she's got a heart of gold.

I can't wait to see what Victoire and Freddy come up with next!

♥ Beth

Author's Response: Yep, exactly - they may allow it toward the end of your seventh year if you're very, very good, but that's about it, and you need to be very closely supervised by a teacher, which Victoire of course wants to avoid. (And if Goldstein knew what she turned into, it would make it a lot less useful for troublemaking. ;))

Neville actually mentioned the bit about their parents in the last chapter - he said that neither he and Goldstein nor their parents had been informed that they'd be missing the Hogwarts Express. I can totally see what you mean, though - it's a little oblique. When I get the chance, I'll go back and see about making it a bit clearer.

I'm so happy you like Victoire being in Ravenclaw! I love my Gryffie Weasleys/Potters, but I do feel like a lot of them would end up elsewhere. Most of them, of course, have a penchant for trouble regardless, though. :P

Thank you so much for the review! ♥

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Review #12, by Veritaserum27 Arrival at Hogwarts

13th October 2015:
Hello, hello!

I'm here for our review swap. Ooo! And I get to count this for BvB review fest. Woot!

I realized I'd already reviewed the first chapter of this, so I read that as a refresher and here I am! Haha - this chapter was great and I really loved the development of the two main characters, as well as the hint of a possible romance between Teddy and Victoire. I'm a huge canon shipper and I LOVE it when an author puts their own spin on the characters, but still stays true to what we know from JKR. I won't be upset if things turn out differently, but it was nice to see there's a possibility here. I also really like that Victoire seems a bit clueless when it comes to how Teddy feels about her - or acts around her. Even Freddie noticed! It's a refreshing characterization for her overall, and she's really growing on me.

I'm excited to see where Roxie gets sorted because she does have a flair for the dramatic and I think it would add a bit of excitement to the Weasley-Potter clan for the first Slytherin sorting in the next gen characters.

Oh! And we get to meet their best friends in this chapter. I love that they can see right through the Weasley cousins' antics. I have a feeling that the four of them can be rather dangerous together.

What's this?! I totally thought they were in the clear! I wonder where their Heads of Houses are taking them...

♥ Beth

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Review #13, by Penelope Inkwell Wasted Research

21st August 2015:
Thank heaven she was just straightforward about it! And Juliet was perfectly reasonable. The angst that can be avoided when people are just honest and no one gets huffy!

Fred and Victoire's relationship is so cute. I've never seen a fic before in which he was old enough to be one of her close friends at Hogwarts, but it could happen, and here I like it.

Now I've just got to know what he's found out!

...plus, not that it's the most important thing, but erm...will we get to see Teddy again? Soon-ish? I'm dying to see more of his and Victoire's interactions!


“Why don’t you go tell talk to them about it?”
--we've got both "tell" and "talk to" right here, and the sentence only needs one of them.

I've enjoyed this fic, and I'm glad I got to stop by and read it. Congrats again on your Dobby pre-nom!


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Review #14, by Penelope Inkwell The Forbidden Forest

21st August 2015:
Oh, okay, well that's freaky.

I like the idea of Victoire being a magical creatures enthusiast who sneaks into the Forbidden Forest to see them. And that bit about the car was a really fun detail--it made me smile.

*Br* the way you described that banshee, though. SO creepy. Why did you touch the comb, Victoire?! This is exactly the kind of mistake she'd never have made if her parents had the good sense to take her to Knockturn Alley. It's like a Scared Straight tactic--you learn to never touch anything that looks like it might be a Dark and powerful object. Mystical silver comb, lying on the ground, shining on the moonless night in the Forbidden Forest?! I never thought I'd say this, but listen to Fred!!!


(though they’d been unable to salvage its eggs, much to Fred’s dismay).
--"salvage" doesn't seem like quite the right word here. It implies that the Ashwinder they'd found was dead or something. Salvage is when, like, you're saving something that otherwise will be lost/trash, which doesn't seem to be the case here. Was Fred wanting to catch a glimpse of the eggs? Steal them and sell them on the black market? I'd suggest a word, normally, but here I can't tell exactly what he wanted.

“Vic!” Fred burst into the small clearing, breathing hard. “What the hell?”
--this struck me as a bit odd, because it seemed like he was right with her until this moment. Maybe you could have her run off towards the comb and leave him behind? That would explain why he bursts in after her in such a huff.

Another really enjoyable chapter! I'm liking this fic a lot.


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Review #15, by Penelope Inkwell Missing the Feast

21st August 2015:
I really liked Professor Goldstein--Anthony Goldstein, from the D.A., I'm guessing? I like that you made it someone who was a minor character in the books. It makes sense that he'd become an Auror, since they got to go straight into the department after fighting in the Battle of Hogwarts. Plus, the way you write him is just so...professorial. He reminds me a bit of McGonagall in that he's kind of stern, but you like him anyway, but he's still clearly his own character. Given the hijinks that it sounds like she's prone to getting into, Victoire is probably lucky he's watching out for her, even if he has probably given her a few detentions.

I also love that you have Victoire, a Ravenclaw, still getting involved in pranks and such. It's not just the Gryffindors! Good for her.

Oh no. That's a definite downside to living in a room full of girls. I pity her, I really do. Girl does need to invest in a good set of earplugs. I'm shocked she's lasted this long without them.


and that she’d sense some real intensity
--"sense" should probably be "sensed"

"She got really red and started giggling, and then he kissed her cheek and followed Holly upstairs.”
--Who is Holly? She just kinda came out of nowhere. At first I thought it was implying that he was going with Holly up to the dormitories to, like, snog or whatever, but that doesn't make sense because he just asked Juliet out.

Another good chapter! I'm enjoying this fic so far.


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Review #16, by Penelope Inkwell Arrival at Hogwarts

21st August 2015:
Bahaha! Smelling her hair. Oh gosh.

So Fred knows, but Victoire didn't. How long has Teddy liked her? Does everyone know.

Man, they really do have good friends, dragging their trunks of the train for them. Hold on to those two. They're gems. (Seriously, that's not a carry-on bag. That's a giant trunk, and they've got their own to haul up to the castle, as well. I'm pretty sure that's the measure of true friendship).

Man, they almost got away with it, too! So close.


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Review #17, by Penelope Inkwell Missing the Train

21st August 2015:
Hey! I'm here checking out the Dobby pre-noms (congratulations, by the way), and so I wanted to stop by and read this one. Victoire and Fred are really cute! And Teddy! I haven't read enough Teddy/Victoire lately, so I'm looking forward to some of that :D

This chapter clips along quite nicely. There's plenty of detail to picture the scenes, and a good balance of dialogue and action.

Really though, who does set their clock 5 minutes slow? *face palms*

However, if it serves as an excuse to visit Teddy, I'm for it!

Awww! Does Teddy have a crush? Maybe? *waggles eyebrowa*

CC: So, as a rule, I always try to give CC, but I just want to applaud you, because I did not notice a single spelling or mechanical error here, and that is phenomenal!

"but she also spied several of him with his friends, and, to her surprise, a few number of her."
--"a few number of her" doesn't sound quite right. Maybe: "a few of her", or "a few pictures of her," might sound better?

“Well, it won’t be food off the trolley, but it probably won’t be terrible, either. Are either of you thirsty?”
--This is well into the realm of the mega nitpicky, but you have so few other errors that that's the realm we're in. ;) This is just a flow thing, but since just asked, "Are either of you hungry?", it's a bit repetitive to ask about drinks in the same way. It might be more natural if he just said, "Thirsty?"

Glad I stopped by. And now I'd like to read on a bit!


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Review #18, by MuggleMaybe Wasted Research

20th August 2015:
Hi Beezie!

I found your story on the Dobbys Rec/Review thread.

What a fun story! I love your characterizations of Vic and Fed - especially Vic! I think she is frequently type cast, and I love that your rendition is feistier. Shenanigans and Hi-Jinks indeed!

The new plot line with the comb is quite intriguing. I never really thought about students going out in the Forest just for something to do. In the original series, it was usually by force or out of desperation that they went to the forest, not just for fun. But I find it very believable that students would do this, and be a bit reckless about it.

What a funny, entertaining, a charismatic story!
Keep up the good work!

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Review #19, by RavenclawFTW Wasted Research

16th August 2015:
Heya Branwen! Here for the swap and BvB!

So, I always love reading this story and your interpretations of Fred and Victoire. I don't want to talk too much about everything I always seem to focus on when I review this story, but I just love this Victoire so much.

Something I loved in this chapter was how Fred joined Victoire even though he didn't approve of her taking the comb in the first place. In fic, I see characters turning their backs on their friends because they don't agree with their decisions, but I love how close Vic/Fred are and how he helps her despite his misgivings. That said, I was surprised that Fred seemed so casual about the whole affair. He ribbed Victoire about it, sure, but given the strong emotional/gut response he had to the comb in the previous chapter, I was surprised he seemed so calm and collected about it this chapter, more curious than anything. I'd've expected him to continue to voice his apprehension about it.

I'm also slightly concerned about Juliet's character at this point in the story. Victoire seems to consistently say that Juliet is a nice girl beneath the hysterical reactions to Fred/her relationship, but it's hard to take that at face value when I don't feel like I've really seen her doing anything besides freak out about Fred. I'm a little confused about what he sees in her besides that she really likes him/is pretty. In this chapter, she definitely redeems herself slightly by her quick understanding of Victoire's request, but it's hard for me to really understand much about her or her relationship with Fred.

I really enjoyed the little insight into Carolyn/Wendy's relationship in this chapter and to see that kind of mature relationship. I also liked that Victoire stayed with them to talk so long-- so often in fic I feel like every couple is just totally unbearable to be around, but that's not true at all! So I liked seeing Victoire getting along so nicely with Wendy.

Then I also really enjoyed the research about the comb-- they didn't find anything right away, which adds to the suspense, but also seems really believable. I'm really excited to learn what Fred found out about it!

Hope you update soon! :)


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Review #20, by Aphoride The Forbidden Forest

16th August 2015:
Hey there, Branwen! :D Dropping by for our swap for BvB fest! :) I just had to come back to this - I wasn't sure I'd reviewed this one or not, so I'm glad (? I think, haha) that I hadn't - though there was another chapter, so even if I had, it would have been fine ;)

Anyway, enough rambling! :P You know I love this fic, and Vic and Fred - and I was so so excited to see them get going with the whole drama/adventure side of things - not that, you know, missing the train and all wasn't adventure, but this is starting to tie in with the summary, which I love so much, and I'm so so excited to see where you go from here with this and all! :)

I love the way Vic and Fred are so casual about popping into the Forbidden Forest - and even how Micah is usually pretty fine with it, but only after the beginning of the year and the threat of trouble dies down (you know, it's little things like that which make your characterisation so full and so wonderful - the sheer level of detail in each of your characters is amazing!) - despite it being totally against the rules and really pretty dangerous. It's such a great side to them both, and I love how Vic is even more relaxed about it than Fred is, so calm and collected even in high-pressure situations. It's a really interesting trait for her to have, but a really useful one too - and one which isn't often seen in fic, strangely enough.

Oh my gosh. That scene in the forest was so... creepy. Like strangely unearthly, and just creepy... but there was this beautiful layer of human interaction in it, between Vic and the banshee which was so lovely - it gave it all this kind of almost-human quality to it, which sort of made it even more creepy, if that makes sense :P I loved the way it happened almost so innocuously, but there was still that sense of danger, that things weren't quite right, and how the comb ended up still with her. Again, it's so creepy, and so suspenseful because why is it there, and how did it get back into her pocket (which I think the answer to is 'magic' :P), and what does it mean - is it really a portent of death, like Fred thinks, or is Vic right and it's not quite as serious as all that? (Though I'm inclined to believe Fred, tbh :P) I really, really wanna read the next chapter and find out (shame I have to cook dinner :P) - you've made me so curious! :)

As always, your writing is so lovely in this - you manage everything in this story so well: the bits of humour, the irritation and the guilt Vic feels in previous chapters, to the darker, more suspenseful bits of this chapter - it's a real skill, because they're so hard to weave into the same thing, and do equally as well, but you manage it so effortlessly I'm almost jealous ;) Plus your description in this, the comb and the light coming off it, the banshee herself, were so so gorgeous, too - I could picture it so easily, you know?

This is such a brilliant story - I know I've told you that before, but it's worth repeating, I think! ;) I'm so so looking forward to getting a chance to read the next chapter and seeing what - if anything - happens with the comb! :D

Aph xx

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Review #21, by DracoFerret11 Wasted Research

15th August 2015:
Hi Branwen! Me again, here to review for the BvB, as well as my love of this story! So, let's go over things:

Grammar/Spelling: I only noticed one stand-out error. Towards the end you have, "Why don't you go tell talk to them about it?" where you'll need to choose between "tell them" and "talk to them." :)

Plot: Another lovely chapter of this story! I feel like I've gotten really bad about including constructive criticism, since I'm so fond of your writing style and story. I literally never see things that I want to ask you to improve on! It's awful. I'm sorry I'm so useless. But anyhow! This was another great chapter. I like that you've drawn out the mystery of the comb. I'm so interested to see what it is and what's going to happen, but I like that you didn't just give us that information right away. The search will make it so much better when we finally find out!

Characterization: As always, your Victoire is fabulous. I never thought I would read a Next Gen story that I liked this much at ALL, let alone one that featured Vic as the main character. For some reason I always thought people wrote her as stuck up or rude, but you've taken such an original route in constructing her as a character, and I love that. I think she's unique and interesting to read, and I love the positive relationships she has with other women. It's so subtle (way better than I can do), but so great. You really get her interactions down pat when it comes to how she talks to each of her friends, as well as Fred. I'm really excited to read on.

Emotions: I guess if I had any CC for this chapter, it would be that neither Fred nor Vic seem all that upset about what the comb could mean. I get some of their curiosity coming through, but I don't seem much distress. I feel like I'd be doing everything to get rid of the thing, just in case. Or at least worrying that something awful was going to happen. So I wonder just why neither of them seems particularly worried.

Overall, this was a great chapter. I really enjoy reading this story, and I think you're doing your characters real justice. Great job, as always, and I'll read on when you write more.

--Emily/DarkRose || August BvB, Team Bronze

P.S. - This is going in my Favorites now. :)

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Review #22, by magnifique11 Wasted Research

15th August 2015:
Oh my gosh, I've never read a fic with Vic & Fred being bffs, but I love it! I need more fics like this so I can read all of them. Seriously though, I think your Vic is really unique and fun to read - if also anxiety-inducing because of that comb! I want to know how/why she has it, and I love banshees so I'm excited to see how you'll bring more of that in to the story.

I also wanted to add that I love your headcanons, especially the one about the professors and how class scheduling works because it makes so much sesne, especially considering how many students Hogwarts has. I may have to adopt some of the same ideas, (though of course I would never copy them - that's never okay).

I'm really looking forward to reading more and this is definitely a new favorite! :)


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Review #23, by navyfail Missing the Train

14th August 2015:
Hey, Branwen! Here for the BvB fest as well as returning some of the kind reviews you left for me during last month's battle.

I've always imagined Victoire and Fred having an age difference between them since I like to think that Fred and James are best friends, but you write there friendship well. They seem to be able to read each other's minds at times and are both really carefree. If I missed the the train, I would be freaking out yet they both stay really calm and collected. They even thought of going to Teddy's. I have to say flooing to their uncle's shop sounds a lot faster than going on the Hogwarts Express and not to mention that they get to see a dark creature exhibit.

I like the hint of Teddy/Victoire you put in here with the photos. I mean he has three of her! That's so cute even though she doesn't get why. Also, I'm surprised that she didn't stare when Teddy opened the door shirtless. Maybe she's just that used to him? And Teddy even proposed being roommates with her after Hogwarts! (Though I think he was teasing for the most part but I'll still take it.) I'm going to take a guess that Fred already knows that Teddy likes her. He seems perceptive like that.

I really like where you are going with this story! It seems very lighthearted but interesting and humorous. And the fact that you've been able to create your own world of characters and stick to them has always been amazing to me! I enjoyed reading this! Great work!


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Review #24, by UnluckyStar57 Missing the Train

13th August 2015:
Hi Branwen! Here for our swap and the BvB Review Fest! :D

Okay, so this is SO FUN! I totally am in love with Fred II right now, and all of the different possible characterizations that he might have, and so I LOVE the way you've written him here. He might have a good relationship with James in this story, but I can't tell yet because he's total BFFs with Victoire (or seems to be). At the very least, putting Fred and Vic together as partners in crime is such a cool and different idea, and I can't wait to see what other fun shenanigans they'll get up to at Hogwarts!

And I love the way you opened this, too. Like, missing the train was such a natural occurrence that they were already planning on telling lies about it. And then they saw their parents and some artful dodging ensued. Hah, I still laugh about how Fred was so self-assured, like "oh yeah, we'll be on that train," oh no, you won't, Fred. (And while I'm looking at her, that CI is SO PRETTY.)

Aaahhh, I have a feeling that this fic is not going to be all about Tedoire, but I love the *wink wink nudge nudge* that you've got in this chapter towards the ship. Aww, it's so cute that Teddy has a total of three pictures featuring Vic, and then the very nice blushy feelings that Vic gets when he says he loves her awww... I'm sure Fred feels pretty left out of this, but that's probably for the best. :P

The idea of a magical menagerie is really cool, like, an advanced petting zoo that isn't for the faint of heart. Vic, Ted, and Fred, not being faint-hearted, will have a really good time there!

(But oh, what kind of wrath will they face from their parents?)

"Rox won't snitch," Fred says. Oddly, I get the feeling that Rox is going to snitch. What can go wrong, must go wrong, right?

I love this opening chapter, and I hope to continue on and read more soon! I know you already have a lot of reviews on this chapter, but I always find it worthwhile to review things in order. :)


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Review #25, by Unicorn_Charm Missing the Train

12th August 2015:
Hey there! Here with your review!! :)

Ooh I think I found a new story I'm going to be addicted to! XD

The opening of this chapter really was funny. I laughed out loud a few times. :)

Fred had given her an easy smile and said, “Oh, don’t worry. We’re not going to miss the train.”

They missed the train.

This was perfection!

I don't think I've seen many fics where Victoire and Fred are the same age, but I really, really like the dynamic you've written between them. I cannot wait to read more of them. They seem more like siblings than cousins, to be honest. I love it.

Oh Teddy ♥ I am so in love with Teddy Lupin and I'm already loving your version of him. He seems so sweet and so cool. Like someone that I would need to be friends with (and probably would have a bit of a crush on). And he can cook! Score! Are he and Vic already together? Or does she just kind of like him at this point? I'm just going to have to keep going and find out. :p

I love that they missed the train. And I love that Fred set his watch slow. Who does that? Haha But they're right, spending the day hanging it in Hogsmeade with Teddy does seem more fun than riding the train to school.

I love this already! I'm so glad that you responded to my status and I had a chance to find this story. I will without a doubt be back to read on. This is a great start to what I'm sure is going to be a wonderful story! Thanks so much for sharing!! ♥

xoxo Meg

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