1,107 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Dojh167 Any Sufficiently Advanced Technology

16th April 2017:
Hufflepuff CtF Review

So I really meant what I said about looking for a shorter chapter to review by you, but my jailbreaking role said otherwise =P

I’m really curious to see where this chapter will fit in with the timeline of the first two chapters. There is no reference to Harry having recently died, so I’m going to assume it is after the second chapter, and that first chapter is set after the rest of the story? The mystery remains.

I was confused for a minute by the name Hermys cause I think Percy’s owl was Hermes, and I almost missed altogether that you sund house elf. It seems odd to me that Harry would own an elf.

omg, Hermione being hungry for toes is adorable.

Hehe I like how confidently Ron said “manipulation” instead of “operation and the familiar smoothness with which Hermione corrected him. I also find it interesting that even though Harry and Hermione grew up muggle, they have developed a mistrust of muggle medicine.

Haha, I love this line: “Arthur’s love of muggle gadgets was matched only by his propensity for accidentally destroying them with magic.” It is so Arthur and so funny!

Okay, a house elf making cute faces at a baby is the cutest thing I’ve read tonight. You win. Can I have a one shot that is just Hermys babysitting?

Huh. I never pictured Kreacher as a family man.

Omg I am a huge Percy fan and divorced moody muggle poetry listening Percy is my new fave. Omg, yes to “Percy’s been working at a midlife crisis since he was what, seventeen?”

Wait, what trial? Did Ginny not die a natural death? At least by this point we get confirmation that this des in fact take place after the second chapter.

“Not only were they expected to do utterly ridiculous things for money, most of their entertainment came from watching other muggles do the same.” Welp, you’ve hit life on the head.

“that one where the nice Italian plumber saves the princess from the gorilla?” You are a delight.

Omg I have so much respect for this little girl whose idea of a good time is playing with a manifestation of her worst fears. Yup, that’s Rose and Scorpius’ kid.

Oh no that’s horrible - is that how Ginny died? What an excellent way to reveal it to the reader though.

This was a good chapter - the dialogue between all of the characters felt very grounded and believable and was fun to read. It did a good job of getting some exposition established without being boring. I’m curious to see where the big conspiracy plot will come into play. You’ve laid some of the groundwork, but we haven’t had the big inciting action yet. You bring Percy up at the end again, which makes it seem like he’s going to be significant. I look forward to reading more about him.

Well done! I may or may not be back - the tides of CtF will tell!

Sam.

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Review #2, by Felpata Lupin Any Sufficiently Advanced Technology

16th April 2017:
Hi, Dan! I'm back for CTF (you can tell I was curious about what was to come... :P)

I loved the first part of the chapter, I enjoyed that it was a bit more light-hearted. Ron and Hermione are always so much fun to see together, I liked how you portrayed their relationship in their later years, it was really endearing. And baby Amelie seems so cute! :)

The bit about genie glass and the new attention of wizardkind for Muggle technology was really interesting, I wonder if it'll have a role in the plot. I love that it helped the Potters and Weasleys' wealth to grow and I loved all the institutions Harry founded, especially the werewolves' one (I have a love for werewolves...)

I also found really funny that Ron followed in Arthur's steps with his craziness for Muggle stuff, that's pretty amusing.

The absence of Ginny is still pretty strong in here, too. It's obvious that her death has affected everyone pretty bad. I'm wondering what's wrong with Percy, but I guess we'll find out later. Also, I'm wondering what happened exactly when Ginny died... was it a Muggle who killed her? Why? What does it have to do with Octavia?

By the way, I also loved the little snippets about Rose and Scorpius and Hugo and Fiona. I read very little next gen, but I think it's fascinating to explore their lives. I'm curious to know more about Rosie and Scorpius' relationship, they are surely an interesting couple. :P

The Boggart scene was really scary. And sad, too. And I'm so curious to learn more, so I might be back again. :)

Goodbye for now,
Chiara

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Review #3, by Felpata Lupin Everything That Ever Mattered

14th April 2017:
Hi, Dan! Here reviewing for CTF!

This was very touching. Poor Harry, how must he miss her... I'd been wondering if he was actually talking to her at first, but then his unilateral conversation, plus the clue of the prologue, made me realize that she had to be dead.

I loved all the details about their granchildren and Harry teaching at Hogwarts and everything else. I love the idea that Neville is Headmaster (and still scared of Snape... that's so endearing!)

Your descriptions were beautiful, too. I loved the atmosphere of the Autumn air and all the details of the estate and the changes over the years. You gave us such beautiful pictures of their family life, you could tell the children of the Potter-Weasley clan grew up in a happy environment.

Harry's grief was written wonderfully, too. I can totally get the guilt and the impotence and the feelings that he just can't keep going without her. It makes me slightly Angri, actually, because he must realize that he can't save everyone, but at the same time I can't blame him *hugs Harry*

I'm curious about what'she's coming next and most importantly how this will tie up with the prologue. I'm very intrigued by all of it. Also, your writing is stunning (if I didn't mention already).

I have to go now, but I might be back.
See you!
With love,
Chiara

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Review #4, by Dojh167 Everything That Ever Mattered

14th April 2017:
Hufflepuff CtF Review

Okay, I’m back and eager to find out just how dead (or not) Harry and Ginny are!
Oh wow, and this opening is not what I expected. Is it a flashback set before they died? Or some iteration of the afterlife?

The opening line reads a bit like an obituary, listing his notable achievements and connections. I think that’s clever.

Haha, the next next generation and people are still naming their kids after Lily. And Arthur! It looks like there will be a ton of new characters and their relationships to keep track of in this story, what with the way those Weasleys multiply.

I like that you let Harry be a teacher. He’s always made more sense to me as a teacher than spending all his years as a ministry worker.

Headmaster Longbottom being fabulous and still being afraid of Snape’s portrait hurts my little heart.

I like the play on words of calling Malfoy a “death-eating git”

Um Harry’s doing an awful lot of talking. What’s up with Ginny?

Haha, with all of the Weasley and Potter kids, of course they can have a whole quidditch tournament just among themselves!

Ooooh I like the idea of Lily working seriously for Weasley Wizarding Wheezes! I don’t think that’s an idea I’ve seen before and I quite like it.

Ah, so Harry is talking to Ginny’s tombstone here. I kind of thought he might be. I love the inscription “Fly fast, chaser girl.”

This is an interesting chapter. It has kind of the feel of a prologue as it takes its time in giving backstory on various characters, but it’s a little funny because the first chapter also felt like a prologue. Since we jumped back in time with this chapter, I’m left wondering when the next chapter will be set. Will it follow up this chapter, or jump forward to after the first when Harry is in Kings Cross.

I am interested to know what happens next, though since the next chapter looks kind of long, for the sake of CtF speediness I might read something else by you next time around.

Sam.

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Review #5, by victoria_anne Prologue

12th April 2017:
As soon as I read misty whiteness, I just knew we'd be at Kings Cross Station.

This made me laugh more than it probably should have: “Great,” he mumbled to himself, “you’re dead again.” Poor little Harry really is beginning to form a habit.

Interesting that he should refer to Voldemort as Tom Riddle. But then, that's what he was calling him when they duelled in the final battle.

Aw, and he's hoping to see Dumbledore. I love that that's one of his first thoughts. Especially when it came before wondering what he had done to get there in the first place, haha! But seriously... what did he do? If it really is the gateway between the living and dead worlds, it's pretty awesome that he's still able to get onto Platform 9 3/4!

Oh, does this mean Ginny is dead too? I'm certainly interested in finding out what happens next! Especially since Harry can't remember the circumstances that brought him there! I don't think I've read your work before (something CtF is bringing to my attention) so that's something I'll have to remedy!

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Review #6, by Dojh167 Prologue

12th April 2017:
Hufflepuff CtF Review

Wow, I don’t get out enough, do I? Doing these review events always gets me finding stories that I feel like I should know about but don’t. While this story is a bit old, I feel like I should have been aware of it as a dobby and golden paw winner. Derp derp. Anyway, I’m here now, and hopefully I can read the first couple chapters over the next couple rounds of CtF

It looks really interesting to me that you say in the summary that Harry will lead four generations. So would that mean Arthur/Molly, the trio, the next gen kids, and their kids? That’s quite an army, whether or not there’s fighting involved!

Your opening is very engaging - it jumps right into something interesting happening, and it’s something that neither Harry nor the reader completely understands at first.

I actually caught on before you specified that he was at the Kings Cross Station of the Kings Cross Again chapter in Deathly Hallows. I figured that out between the white missed and the tone of how straightforwardly he accepted the unusual circumstances without panic.

Haha, I love the humor of “Great,” he mumbled to himself, “you’re dead again.” It’s very Harry. It almost sounds like he may have “died” another time since Deathly Hallows and it’s just something he rolls his eyes at by this point. But no, you say that his last time here was in DH.

Oh that’s interesting, that he was on the muggle side of the platform. I wonder if that has special significance. Now that I think of it, I’m not sure it was specified in Kings Cross Again. I suppose both sides would look the same all empty like that, but I imagine since this is a place Harry’s mind sentimentally generated, it makes sense that he would want to be on the magical side.

Does Ginny here mean she already died? I imagine Harry was quite death by his death here, if there are two generations beyond him. But I don’t imagine Harry will stay dead for this story, which makes me wonder if Ginny is really dead or will be returning with Harry.

This is an intriguing start, and I’m interested to see what happens next!

Sam.

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Review #7, by Freddie Rindklip The Needs of the Many

18th February 2017:
I am not much of a reviewer, but I really like it.

Author's Response: I'm really happy that you're enjoying it.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #8, by GoGoWeasleyPants Embracing the Darkness

8th August 2016:
I'm worried about Hermione and her hate legs. What will it actually cost her to walk again?

Author's Response: As it turns out, it will cost her quite a bit. If you're still reading, I assume you've discovered that by now.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #9, by GoGoWeasleyPants The Silliest Thing I’ve Ever Heard

8th August 2016:
I'm so hooked! Great story and I really like the way you write it too.

Author's Response: I'm really pleased that you're enjoying the story. Thank you for reading and for leaving a review!

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Review #10, by Nat Epilogue

7th August 2016:
Amazing story, couldn't stop reading it!

Author's Response: I'm really pleased to know that you enjoyed it.

Thank you for reading and letting me know!


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Review #11, by Ben Epilogue

21st June 2016:
Hi, not sure if you still check these reviews, but just finished reading this, and wanted to say how amazing it was.
Emotional, exciting, funny and easy to read.

Closest Fanfic I have seen to the great JK Rowling. Thank you for all the effort I am sure that this took.

I hope that you haven't given up writing as you seem to have a gift.

12/10

Author's Response: Hi, there!

I confess that I don't check reviews every day (twice a day... every hour...) like I used to, but I do still pay attention.

Thank you for the kind words. I really appreciate it and I can't think of any higher praise than that.

I do still write from time to time, although I haven't posted anything in a while. Hopefully I can change that soon.

Thank you again,
Dan


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Review #12, by Toni Epilogue

27th April 2016:
I have just finished this story, with tears running down my face. It is a beautiful story and I am glad Harry and Esme didn't get together. Always Harry and Ginny for me. Wonderful writing. Keep it up. Cannot wait until your next one.

Author's Response: I'm very happy that you enjoyed it.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #13, by dumbledore_wannabe Epilogue

8th April 2016:
I found this story only a week or two ago and have been reading like crazy. I would probably be fired if they knew how much time I've spent reading it at work because I simply had to find out what happened next. This story is absolutely amazing. And the last part of the last chapter - I was absolutely sobbing and smiling at the same time. What a wonderful and entirely perfect conclusion to a masterful story. THANK YOU.

Author's Response: Hi, there.

I'm really pleased that you enjoyed the story. I do hope it doesn't hurt your career in any way. ;) Thank you so much for letting me know that you liked it. It really means a lot.


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Review #14, by dumbledore_wannabe Those Who Don’t Learn From History

30th March 2016:
Dennis' lesson. Brilliant.

Author's Response: Nobody understands Dementors until they've felt the cold. Or something like that. ;)

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #15, by dumbledore_wannabe Any Sufficiently Advanced Technology

30th March 2016:
Thank you for that author's note! It was making me crazy trying to remember where I had read about genie glass... Even though I hate thinking of Ginny being gone, I'm enjoying this story, very different!

Author's Response: Hi!

I always love to give a shout-out to the stories that helped to inspire this one.

Not having Ginny be part of this story was the hardest decision I made. I hope you'll like the place that decision ultimately led to.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #16, by StarFeather The Injuries We Can’t See

28th March 2016:
Hi, Dan! This chapter is also amazing! My son came back to listen to my translation ( we read the first half of this chapter last week but he went to bed in the middle.), so I read all for him to the end.

We got so excited at the fight scene in front of the gate at Hogwarts and chuckled at each movement and thoughts of Ron. My son told me that the scene of the sports bar, the conversation with the Muggle was interesting, too.

It's quite interesting to read the changes in Percy's mind. And the descriptions about the process Hermnione tried to stand up again is marvelous, too.

There were many spots I put my heart to read out aloud like an actor when I translated them to my son, I mean very moving scenes:

“You’re not listening, Ron,” Percy snapped. “I have spent years trying to forget everything that happened that night. I’m not going to dredge it all up just because you and Harry have some half-baked theory about the New Blood Order killing Ginny.”

He felt slender fingers running through his hair, and shifted his gaze slightly to the side. He could make out a blurry image of bright auburn hair. He sighed contentedly, feeling as though some terrible thing that he couldn’t quite recall had turned out to be all in his head.


“Daddy, are you awake?” Lily’s voice sounded slightly muffled, as though his head was inside a barrel. As soon as he realized who she wasn’t, the terrible thing was back, like a great weight on his aching chest. He must have let a frown cross his face.

“Including you!” she snapped. Harry couldn’t see his daughter’s eyes, but he was sure that they were flashing with anger exactly like her mother’s. After several seconds, he felt the weight of her shoulders and head on his chest. He stroked her hair with his uninjured hand and felt her body shudder slightly. “Daddy,” she whispered, “we’ve already lost Mum. I don’t want to lose you, too.”


Her plea pierced his heart. He lay there for a long moment, considering the unbalanced mess his life had become. As he comforted his baby daughter, he silently cursed the part of himself that wanted nothing more than to let it all go and be with Ginny again. It was only too easy to foresee a moment of weakness when that part would lead him to the exact decision she feared.


“I’ll try, pumpkin,” he whispered. “I’ll try.”




Thank you for great story, again. We'll be back.

Kenny

Author's Response: Hi, Kenny! Sorry to take so long to respond. To be honest, I've been avoiding logging on for the past week or so. Too much of a reminder of what's coming. But it's definitely time to re-engage and stop moping about it.

There were a lot of emotional scenes in this chapter. All of the characters are grappling with difficult situations and personal challenges. Hermione is struggling mightily to come to terms with her paralysis, but something is holding her back. Percy is trying to put the past behind him. Harry's tortured soul can't seem to let go of Ginny.

I'm really glad that you and your son are enjoying it! Thanks so much for letting me know.


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Review #17, by StarFeather Dark and Angry Souls

13th March 2016:
Hi, Dan. I'd like to say thank you that you created this story. Today I translated this chapter to my son and he liked it very much. He told me that he didn't notice the time passed while I translated this chapter into my mother toungue. As he said, your story has deep colors, how can I say, I don't know how to tell you our excitement.

Each scene is marvelous: Dumbledore of the portrait told his former students about the dark magic book. Hermione's description with help from Susan, Terry and Ernie, Ron's funny and difficult situation at the muggle computer and Harry's struggle remembering his wife and the question why Octavia was holding Ginny's wand and why she couldn't survive. Everything is super.

I'm afraid Octavia might be confunded or imperiused by the Lady to kill Ginny.

I'll be back again with my son's review in the next chapter.

Kenny

Author's Response: Hi, Kenny!

I feel terrible for not answering this sooner. Time keeps running away on me.

I'm very, very flattered that you think the story is worth translating for your son to read. It's an honor.

A lot of plot points come out in this chapter, things that will play a big role later on. Overall, it's still one of my favorites.

Octavia was neither confunded nor cursed. She was merely a curious toddler doing what curious toddlers do. Suffice it to say that what Octavia did changed Lady Tenabra's plans somewhat, but not in a way that was at all upsetting to her.

I look forward to seeing what your son thinks of the rest of it. Thank you to both of you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #18, by Bluewolf80 Epilogue

13th February 2016:
I read this for the first time maybe a year ago. I just finished it again and I NEVER re-read fanfics! This one is worth it though. It is so well crafted that when I am reading it I am reminded of a master potter sitting at his wheel sculpting, molding, with clay that is gradually taking shape into a beautiful masterpiece.

Even on my second go round I still had trouble keeping all the grandchildren straight. I can understand why Harrry would use the tapestry to "cheat"! If I wasn't such a PotterHead and already knew all of them, it would be even harder. I'll have to go back and read 'Evolution' and get caught up. I'm so glad that you did not just make up names but used the canon ones.

I think that my favorite thing was the way that you included the character of Death. There were so many references to the Deathly Hallows story. Like the cloak and meeting as old friends. Loved it! I truly enjoyed the way you weaved that into your story.

I really think this is one of the best fan fictions out there. I hope to read more of your work soon. Keep writing! I'm sure that you will be successful.

Author's Response: Hello, again!

First off, thank you for leaving such a detailed, thoughtful review. It is greatly appreciated.

I... um... wow. You left me kind of speechless there. Not completely sure how to respond to such kind words. I have a giant smile every time I reread this review.

I always felt like Harry would want a large family for two reasons: 1) he never had a family to speak of growing up, and 2) I felt like he was very envious (not in a negative way) of the Weasleys for being such a close, loving family.

The idea of including Death in this story was something that popped into my head very late in the process of drafting that chapter. I had the trainman already, but prior to that he was modeled after a non-psycho version of the Trainman in the Matrix movies. He was a gatekeeper between worlds.

Again, I can't thank you enough for all of the kind words and for leaving such a nice review. It means a great deal to me and I'm very happy that you enjoyed the story!


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Review #19, by StarFeather The Silliest Thing I’ve Ever Heard

7th February 2016:
Hi, Dan! I could come back here! I really enjoyed this chapter. So many stars entered. The trio and Luna, Percy, Audrey, and Lady Tenabra.

Tha sad moment, Harry remembered Ginny, when Hermione explained the scene, is the most impressive and his anger you wrote is the most awesome spot I felt. His power to solve the case, I think rage against the evil act can lead to the solution. I remembered why I love your novels. A strong sense of justice, to get angry for his fellow Auror who died leaving his family, this is Harry.

I like the conversation between Luna and the trio. And I like the way how Harry and she entered the Weasley's living room. The minature investigating scene reminded me of "Back to the Future" where Doc tested the simulation of Delorean.

It's horrible to imagine how Flint's dead body was like. I hate Lady Tenabra. Flint might be a bad guy, but I remember he was a Hogwarts student and played Quidditch with Harry.

I like your description of Kriffin and the book written by Lockheart. You captured how the house-elf behaves and how Harry reacts him very well. It's marvelous you set Lockheart's ridiculous book among the serious case.

One more, what will happen to Percy and Audrey next?

Kenny

Author's Response: Hi, again, Kenny! Thanks for coming back so soon!

This chapter ended up with a pretty large cast. There are a few later on that have even more, but it does start to get unwieldy when you have so many.

I think of Harry the same way: very motivated to bring justice to those who deserve it. Thanks to Petunia and Vernon, he grew up without a strong sense of self-worth, so helping others is mostly how he measures his own worth.

Luna is always fun to write. I don't think I could write her in the first person, just because I really have no idea what's going through her head. Hermione's diorama is sort of like Doc Brown's scale model, only she has the benefit of being able to conjure things and even animate them if she wants to. Knowing Hermione, I'm sure she included a lot of details.

In some ways, Flint got what was coming to him, but that doesn't make Tenabra any more likable. You'll see again and again that once she no longer has a use for you, you're just another loose end that needs to be eliminated.

House elves are fun to write, at least for me. Odd little creatures with a completely different mindset and value system.

Percy and Audrey are having a very difficult time. And if you expect that to change soon, I have some bad news for you...

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!


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Review #20, by mysuv1 The Injuries We Can’t See

5th February 2016:
not sure if i like where it is going

Author's Response: Eh, give it a chance. There are lots of twists and turns, so you might suddenly find the story heading in a direction you like better.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #21, by mysuv1 The Silliest Thing I’ve Ever Heard

4th February 2016:
this is an unusual concept

Author's Response: Writing is more fun when you try to do some unusual things.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #22, by StarFeather Searching for Answers

30th January 2016:
Hi,Dan.

Finally I came back again. As I wrote in your MTA thread, I thought chapter 11 was the best, you portrayed the trio very well but I'd like to say this chapter is also great. I enjoyed the scene, Harry's accomplishment of his mission very much. Mainly it was Harry to play an active part, but I really like you set Ron as a backup for Harry during his mission. I like the idea involving old Hagrid's disinformation, too.

Oh, my.. when I read the part of Hermione at the first sentnece, I felt the gap between Harry's mission and Hermione's state of mind, the dynamic and the static state. Then you wrote "the teachings of an ancient Zen philosopher as I expected! I strongly felt that at the very first sentence, " Hermione listened to the sounds of water falling over the edge of the small fountain...
Hm..."Peace led to serenity" yes, calmness.
"Serenity led to acceptance." acceptance? maybe... yeah, acceptance to live together with her situation.
"Acceptance led to growth"? Acceptance led to reborn? just my thought.

Poor Hermione. She's not ready for the fact that she has to use the wheel chair.

The conversation between Scorpius and Draco is very impressive. I was amazed by your imagination. How could you create such a nice scene out of nowhere? Especially I like this dialogue, "Don't let pride or your faith in Potter blind you to the truth. He can't protect everyone, everywhere, all the time." I felt sad remembering Ginny was dead in your story (That was the reason why I couldn't keep reading this when I found your story as I mentioned at your MTA. I knew this existed when I entered this site. But now I can't stop reading yours! I'm completely hooked.)

Then I confirmed why you got Golden Paw Award for Best Trio. I felt excited at Hermiolne's highly motivated attitude and her thought about the way how Harry got the file and Ron's decision that he would not tell the Auror training related to her levitation.

I take back my previous statement. The most impressive scene for me is "Father and son locked green eyes for a long moment. Even Harry was surprised when he found himself turning away first."

Oh, I'll take back the words^ again. I love the last scene, Harry's message via the silver stag the most, Dan!

I hope I can come back soon.

Kenny

Author's Response: Hi, Kenny!

I enjoyed writing Harry's infiltration of the Minister's office as much as any part of the story. It was fun to let him showcase the skills he spent his career as an Auror developing.

Hermione is not in a good way, but she's trying hard to move on from her injury. There's something she just can't get past. More on that very soon...

I worked a lot on tweaking Draco's dialog to try to preserve the essence of who he is while aging him realistically. At this time in his life, he lives for his family. It's not a completely different ideal from the way he thought when he was younger, it's just that family means something different to him now.

The dynamic between the trio has always fascinated me. I like exploring all of the little aspects of it.

Ha! I loved the idea of Harry sending the patronus, upsetting the Slytherins and getting his message across all at once. The old man does indeed have class.

Hope to see you back soon, my friend!

-Dan


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Review #23, by Veritaserum27 The Needs of the One

24th January 2016:
Dan, Dan, Dan...

You're kind of evil for the way you started this chapter off. The last one ended with Susan on the verge of death after the showdown at the Ministry. She Albus and Hugo were fighting their way out of a sticky situation and it was just as intense as the scene you describe with Harry at the opening of this chapter.

Except he's playing Exploding Snap.

I actually found it extremely adorable that he and Ron can still get up to such antics as they did when they were twelve. And it's just so Hermione-like to put a stop to it. I also find it adorable that Ron and Hermione still have the gumption to get up to whatever they were getting up to the minute Harry and Esme left the country - heh heh.

It’s a very intricate spell, but fortunately it’s also very robust. She spent a lot of time on this. I’d say she really cared about keeping in touch with her sister.

I feel like I should hold on to this sentiment. Something smells important here...

I'm intrigued that the group now have a supply of portkeys, polyjuice potion and some other good things. This is so much different from when they were hunting horcruxes and had to search around for the most basic necessities.

You have an amazing talent for writing such a complicated plot, yet keeping it all straight and understandable for your readers. There are a LOT of Potters and Weasleys, but the group manages to come up with a plan for them in a few moments time - and the Delacours makes perfect sense. I'm breathing a sigh of relief that they will be safe there.

So I gotta admit - I'm more than a little nervous for Al and Hugo to gather all the family and get to the Delacours. They don't seem to be the best at thinking on their feet in a sticky situation. I'm sure it's mostly because they simply haven't had to do it nearly as much as their parents did, but all the same - they have a LOT of people to account for and get to safety - especially considering they aren't 100% certain where everyone is. But Harry and Ron didn't have much of a choice. They can't have Hermione do it in her current state, Esme doesn't know them very well, so she would probably be more of a hindrance, and Harry and Ron must get Susan immediate medical attention. My nerves are really humming on this all playing out well (I'm not going to even try to pretend it's going to play out according to plan - this is Harry and Ron we're talking about - and their offspring).

Ah! The house elf ward at St. Mungo's! How clever. Although I don't rightly blame the elves for being so standoffish. They can't start accepting every Tom, Dick, and Susan that waltzes in and asks for medical attention - it could end up being an underground (but yet above the heads of the wizards) medical treatment facility for anyone who wanted to stay "off the grid." All the same - I'm glad they finally agreed to treat her.

Dennis Northway is a really lovable character. I don't know why, but I've grown quite fond of him.

Fortunately for Oliver, he had his family to fall back on and fortunately for Dennis, Oliver and Artie had sort of pulled him along with them. -That's just the Potter way.

And then we have our suspected Professor Tennant doing exactly what we suspected him of doing. And poorly. Even the Hogwarts students are noticing his behavior.

Poor Dennis - he's stuck between a rock and a hard place, at the moment.

As they walked, Artie peered around to make sure that nobody was listening and whispered, “We’re going to start dueling lessons again, in secret. We’re working on finding a good place to practice. -Hey! I might know of a cool place for that sort of thing!

I really love how you've got little parallels here and there to the books. For example, the inept Dark Arts Professor, the kids practicing dueling in secret, and Rowle with his two, enormous cronies for backup. I really appreciate those little details.

But here's something different! They are planning on going to Professor Longbottom to tell him about Tennant's bizarre behavior. This is a stark contrast to the books, when Harry, Ron and Hermione usually took it upon themselves to solve the problem instead of asking a teacher.

I loved the end of this and how it all tied together! Haha - I love that Neville has struck a proper balance between casting his authority and being approachable to the students. He has Dumbledore's "piercing stare" (I think all teachers need that one from time to time :) ), but he also remembers the contributions students can make to the fight against evil.

I hope the Grey Lady doesn't scare them off. And I'm so excited to see the Room of Requirement again. I think J.K. hinted that the Fiendfyre might've destroyed it beyond use in the last book, but it's never been something that I could reconcile in my head. That room is just too cool for it to not be around!

Great chapter - I didn't catch any typos! :D

♥ Beth

Author's Response: Hi, Beth! I guess I can't just keep staring at this amazing review and smiling at it forever...

A little misdirection makes a story more fun, don't you think? :p It's boring to ease readers into the exact scene they are expecting without adding some uncertainty about what's taking place and where. Or, yeah, I might just be kind of evil.

Katerina Porcher did love her sister a great deal and went to great lengths to make sure that they didn't lose touch. So you're right, it's interesting that it happened so abruptly.

There are a mountain of Potters and Weasleys in this story, so it did become a challenge to keep them all straight and remember what they were doing at any point in time.

Al and Hugo are in way, way, way over their heads. Nothing in their lives could have prepared them for what they're about to face. In some respects it's similar to how the Trio was sent out into the cold, hostile world to hunt horcruxes, but this generation doesn't have the benefit of a Hermione to puzzle out all of the tough situations or a Harry who throws caution to the wind and acts on instinct. You'll see the consequences of this fact very soon.

Yes, the House Elf Ward. I first saw this in another fic (Learning to Live Again? I'm embarrassed to admit I don't exactly remember) and I fell in love with the idea. It is a very uncomfortable situation for all involved.

I've said since Dennis first appeared to keep an eye on him. Dennis is not only a character, he's also a metaphor for a magical world that's become complacent and naive. A big part of the plot is how Dennis gradually realizes the true dangers that surround him.

Yes, the Potter/Weasley kids do have that one advantage over their parents. They have actually been taught to trust and confide in the authority figures in their lives. How much trouble could have been saved if only Harry had done the same...

I do love writing "Neville the Headmaster". It's such a contrast to how he behaves when he's in the company of his own contemporaries. There's actually a lot of that in this story and it made the writing that much more fun.

I chose to believe that Fiendfyre destroyed "the Room of Hidden Things", but that was only one facet of the Room of Requirement. It works for me. :)

Thanks so much for all of the support and attention to detail!

-Dan


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Review #24, by Jace76 Any Sufficiently Advanced Technology

30th November 2015:
I am loving that you have taken inspiration from two of my favourite stories. It's awesome to see others interpretations of what would happen to the characters latter on.

Author's Response: Hi! They're two of my favorites, as well. I hope you enjoy my ideas for what might have happened next.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #25, by Veritaserum27 The Needs of the Many

26th November 2015:
Hi there Dan,

I tried to get this all wrapped up last night, but I’d been baking all day long and I ended up falling asleep - haha! Anyway - here is a Thanksgiving Day review for you!

I loved the first scene with Susan. Actually, I love Susan. One of the things that J.K. did with her characters was to make magic ‘the great equalizer.’ Being a Quidditch player or an Auror or even Minister or Headmaster/mistress wasn’t ever construed as typically a man’s job. Along with her lack of prejudice in other areas, this is one of the reasons why I loved the series so much. I adore reading stories like yours where characters are strong, capable and brilliant regardless of their gender or sexuality or race. And I love Susan.

Poor Draco. As usual, I feel like he’s going to be stuck having to make a decision between two very, very bad choices. This line makes me a little nervous:

He vaguely remembered skimming a pamphlet from the Magical Creatures Department years ago and he could have sworn that it said that elves were not able to repair curse damage,

I really hope this isn’t foreshadowing of some sort. But goon on Astoria for not being as dim-witted or as disloyal as her husband predicts. Another strong female character. Noted. I’m a bit surprised that Narcissa Malfoy was so poor with money. She actually always struck me as someone who was really with-it when it came to maintaining her family’s posterity. Either someone has siphoned off the Malfoy fortune or Lucius always took care of all of that and when he became ill and eventually passed, Narcissa didn’t know how to keep track of their money.

I noticed this chapter contains three vignettes like most of yours, but unlike the others, this final section is about the same character as the first one. And whooo boy, does it ever have some action. Hold on to your hats! I enjoyed reading the skirmish at the Ministry quite a bit, but I did not expect Susan to get injured so badly.

“Hugo, get over here!” Al’s voice rang with barely contained panic. More bad news. At the rate things were going, Hugo was probably digging a hole nearby.

There’s that humor again. And much needed this time. Was Susan referring to Ron or Harry when she said “call your dad?”

I know I won’t be able to wait very long to get to the next chapter - YIKES! What a cliffhanger.

Sorry this review isn’t as long as usual, but I wanted to spread some Thanksgiving cheer.

♥ Beth


Author's Response: Hi, Beth! Happy Black Friday Weekend to you!

I love Susan, too. Time and again, she has Big Moments and steals scenes in this story. I don't know what I'm going to do with her. Maybe write an entire novel about her someday? If only there was time...

Draco spends a lot of time dealing with confusing decisions in this story. That's part of what makes him fun to write: he's always working with a little less information than most of the other characters. He's not the Head Auror or a high-ranking official in the Department of Magical Law. He's lived the majority of his adult life on the fringe of "polite society" because of his family's involvement in the war. So he spends a lot of time trying to work things our for himself based on what little he knows for sure plus a lot of personal insight and intuition. I really enjoyed writing his inner dialog as he puzzles through things.

Astoria is not dimwitted or disloyal in the slightest. She's a very strong character and Draco would be hopelessly lost without her. I don't think that Narcissa ever had to manage money before old Lucius passed away. I doubt that Cygnus and Druella would have considered that a "proper" thing for their youngest daughter to worry herself with and I'm confident that Lucius always made a big show of money being no concern for his family. All she had ever seen anyone do with money was spend it, and she probably trusted the Goblins implicitly to manage her financial affairs. That was a poor choice.

I mixed up the structure of the chapters a lot in this story, mostly based on what I needed to get done in each one. Three seemed like a good good number for the "scenes" in each chapter, but I don't think I stuck with it religiously.

I love Susan's gallows humor. Later on in the story, you'll meet a Beauxbatons professor who could be an older version of Susan. The motif works for me. I honestly don't remember whether Susan was telling Hugo to contact Ron or Al to contact Harry. Since it's sort of assumed that the two of them were together, I doubt that it mattered much to Susan.

A cliffhanger, you say? Well, you would certainly know one if you saw it. :p

Thank so much for brightening my Turkey Day! I always enjoy it when you stop by!


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