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This is a really cool concept for a story!  I have honestly wondered why it took Harry so long to wonder about his parents' graves.  I would have thought that would be one of the first things he wondered about.

I love how you have him going to McGonagall for help.  Don't get me wrong, I'm one of those few folks that still manages to love Dumbledore even though I think he didn't make the best decisions in Book 5, but I really do think McGonagall cares a ton about her Gryffindor charges, Harry in particular.  It's nice to see her being able to help him out.

I really enjoyed the picture of McGonagall that early in the morning.  Somehow I feel better knowing she isn't a morning person ever.  (Oh, and for the record, the play on words for your title is very nice!)  And of course she would know he was pacing outside her office before he even knocked. :)

The line about driving the portraits crazy was great!

Nice start here!  I hope Harry gets his wish to go to his parents' grave without too much hassle!  Thanks for sharing!

Author Response

hey! 
I honestly thought the same thing, which is how this story came about. I was talking to someone about it, and she was like - why don't you write it...and so I have! 

Since finding out more about him he's not my favourite anymore (but hey he's not so bad.) but in the next chapter there's more reasoning about why Dumbledore doesn't go. In the films and books Minerva always seemed to care about Harry a lot, and I love writing her, so I thought she'd fit the bill pretty well! :D 

I thought it'd be a nice little intro to the story, like she has to wake up early every day, but she isn't happy about it! That moment of her knowing he was there before he even knocked was the kind of magic that I loved about the HP series...I can't describe it, but it's little fluffy things I wanted to get in now before the next few chapters. 

Thanks so much for reviewing and I hope you stick around to find out if Harry gets to go see his parents'. 

Bex

I WANT A DAYDREAM WITH FRED!!  How do I sign up?

Okay, sorry about that shouting.  Don't know what cam over me.

May I just say first off, that I absolutely LOVED "Understood Betsy" when I was a girl.  Thanks to you, I feel like Hermione and I share something now. :)

And you, my dear, are an AMAZING author!  I loved every word of this.  Seriously, it was so good I often just forgot I was reading and felt like I was right there.  Thank you for sharing that amazing talent with us, to read and enjoy and bring to life our own daydreams. 

I have to commend you on the daydream you gave Hermione.  It would have been so easy to throw caution to the wind and take her on a wild ride with Fred, but you didn't.  And it worked that much better for it.

Now, on to my twins.  YOU WRITE THEM BRILLIANTLY!!!  Seriously, I've rarely read a rendering of them as good as this!  Makes me ready to hang up the Fred and George towel and pass the torch to you.  

Thank you.  SO much.  I'm adding this to my favorites, for as long as I can keep them anyway.

Bravo.

Author Response

Can't.
Review.
Laughing.
Too.
Hard.

Oh my gosh.  THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER!!!  How could I NOT like this story?  Can I hug you?  Can I clone you?  Can I keep you forever?

You are brilliant.  That's foreshadowing.  It will come back again.

YOU ARE BRILLIANT!  (see, told you)

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart for this.  For the uber kind shoutout at the beginning that you didn't need to do.  And most of all for making me smile and laugh in what has been a very gloomy time.

You rock.

Author Response

&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;&hearts;

(I was going to have that be my whole response but decided that you deserved more than that... Thank you! I'm so glad this story gave you something to laugh about and that you enjoyed it :D Did you notice who Fred and George were talking to in the corridor outside the Ravenclaw Tower? :P

Excellent use of foreshadowing by the way haha. And thank you. :D

&hearts;

Beautiful and heartbreaking and amazing.  You are truly gifted with words and the ability to express feelings with them.  My heart broke for Mark as I read this and I wished I could reach into the story and change things for him, make her realize what she is to him.

I'm sorry this review is so short, but I hope you can still tell that this is amazing. :)

Keep it up, my friend, no matter what.

Author Response

Farmgirl!!

Gah! You're making me blush! You're so sweet my dear!

Your reviews always make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, so matter how short! I hope you know that. :)

Thank you SO much for R&R'ing, and THANK YOU EVEN MORE for being such an amazing friend! *squishes*
Lizzie

Kaitlyn, dear, it is really not nice and fair that this story does not come with a tissue warning.  Actually, probably stronger than that.  More like a "You will bawl your eyes out when you read this story, so raid Walmart for tissues before you start" warning would be more appropriate.  

Because, seriously...GAH!!!  The feelings!  How could you do this to me!  Rip open the wound of Fred's death again.  *cries for a while before she can finish the review*

I'm so sorry it took me so long to get to this amazing story.  And I'm still so humbled and amazed that you wrote this for me, featuring George (and a cameo by Fred.)  That is one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me.

I loved that you chose Dennis as the character here.  And I adored how George came to help him put his grief in perspective.  No, it will never go away, but you can learn to live with it.  

I love the little details you always put in your stories.  How relatives got to carve the name of their loved one on the memorial.  How McGonagall still looked fondly at the corner of swamp left.  How George asks for his memories of Colin, knowing they will be different from what anyone else remembers about him.  Very good writing!  You are awesome.

Have I told you that before?  YOU ARE AWESOME AND AMAZING!

It was SO great to see Fred and Colin there at the end, still watching over their brothers even if from the other side.  I like to think maybe Fred somehow is the one who sent an urge to George that he needed to go to Hogwarts, check on and talk with Colin.  

Beautiful story, and I'm still so shocked you did this for me.  Thank you so much!  I loved it, and I wanted you to know that.

- Farmgirl

Author Response

I'm sorry this review is short.  But, the story is short so I think that's probably okay.

Besides, how many words do I need to tell you that I really like this!  The idea of the Hogwarts Express being alive and caring about the students he carries...seeing the books through that angle.  I love it!

Oh, and I love that the Express argued with the Ford.  HA!  Great job!

Author Response


Thanks Farmgirl!  I thought the Anglia would have attitude, and that the Hogwarts Express would want to show him up a bit!

Pix

Hey there Lizzie!  Figured I'd better stop by and give this a real review, instead of just random comments in a chat.

No Titanic here.  PROMISE!

You have a real gift for characters!  Right off the bat, in only a very short section, you have created characters that draw your readers in and make us care about them.  (Which, is probably unfortunate in the case of these two characters, since.yeah.  *siffles*)  They have depth, emotions, personality, quirks, different voices...everything!  And you do it instantly, without having to warm into them at all!  That's a really good talent to have, so bravo!

I have to admit I do love the nods to other fandoms.  And being a history nerd myself, I love the ancient civilizations side.  I'm really excited to see how your mythology unfolds and how you twist myths and history to fill the needs of this story!  It's a brilliant premise! 

The writing is solid and engaging, as always!  

Thanks for sharing this great start!  You are amazing.

Author Response

Farmgirl!! So glad you stopped by!

Awe! Thank you! I'm glad you like Seb and Claire. :D As to their fate... well, you'll just have to find out, huh?

There's going to be loads more mythology and ancient civilizations involved in this story, so it should be something to look forward to! (And don't worry, there's going to be LOADS of references to different fandoms in this story. You know me, I just have to...)

Thank you so much for stopping by! It means a lot to me that you reviewed this! You're so awesome!!

Lizzie

Wow!  I loved this!  I have often wondered about Hermione and her parents and that whole Australia thing.  It's a bit funny and very convenient when read in passing in the books, but when you really stop to think about it, the whole thing becomes oh so complicated and messy and difficult.  I loved how you showed that so well!  Hermione kept her parents safe, but she also disrupted their lives and erased a huge chunk of their hearts by making them forget her.  Forgetting a person you have built your life around is hard to do.

Another thing I really enjoyed about this great and original story was that it was told from Mrs. Granger's POV.  That was awesome!  I loved that we got to see glimpses of Margaret's life before she married.  You gave her a personality - friends, interests, quirks.  You explained Hermione's name and love of books and intense passion for things without ever shoving it in the reader's face.

Brilliant story and I've added it to my favorites!  Thanks for sharing and I'm so glad I finally took the time to read this.

- Farmgirl

Author Response

You know, this was short and totally different from anything I've ever ready, and a little odd...but I really, really liked it.

Poor Oliver, though.  Having to play nice with the media - especially a "pink obsessed" reporter!  That car sounds rather torturous.  And are you sure that reporter isn't related to Rita Skeeter?

I really liked your cameraman.  Thought his personality came across very well and complete, even though we only saw him for a few lines.

And I can honestly see Oliver having anger issues.  He always did take the Quidditch thing a little too seriously, so having to be benched and not help his team out would really, really get to him.

The best part was the twist though, that he LIKED the little birds!  And that he wanted to stay for a while.  Though they do say that animals can help with stress.

Perhaps Oliver should get a pet?

Great story!  Really fun to read.  So glad I had the chance to come back to your stuff for a bit.  Keep up the good work!

House Cup 2015 - Gryffindor

Author Response

Thanks for the review!

Yeah, this one was a little bit silly and weird--blame it on the 2014 House Cup, I guess.  Oliver definitely has his work cut out for him, dealing with the press and stuff.  The reporter isn't directly related to Rita, but she's sort of a follower of the Skeeter Cult, which I imagine to be a thing that exists.

Glad you liked the cameraman!  He actually turned out to be much more tolerable than I would've expected, so yay for that! :D

Oliver probably didn't have anger issues quite as bad when he was at Hogwarts, but I imagine that the stress of professional Quidditch sort of brought that side of him out into the open.  But I also would like to think that he has a soft side--hence, the birds.  Animals are very good for therapy, and with fluffy golden birds flying around, you can't help but appreciate the beauty of nature. :D

Oliver should get a pet.  He should get a canary or something, since Snidgets are protected by magical law. :)

Thanks again!
&hearts;Mallory

House Cup 2015 Gryffindor

Hey there!  Been far too long since I reviewed anything of yours.  Figured this was as good an excuse as any to come back to your impressive collection.

And just a heads up, this is going to be one of those "as you go along" kind of reviews, because I feel like giving you my thoughts as they come to me. :)

Of course the very first thing that pops into my head is crazy, LOL.  But I can't help picturing a scene from The Music Man as I start reading this, hehehe.  Now I'm going to have "Madam Librarian" stuck in my head as I go.

Oh, I really like your line about Victorian poetry!  So deep, just like the poems you are writing about.  Seriously, how do you think of these beautiful sentences?

"The Lady of Shaloot" - and now I have scenes from Anne of Green Gables in my head as well.

Really, Lily, you're going to blame him for ending his sentence in an preposition?  Everyone does that!

Hehehehe.  I love the little details in this story!  "She didn't like the way his pencil behind his ear tilted."  That's brilliant.

You know, Lily, you really aren't being that approachable for someone who is supposed to HELP people.

Love James sneaking up on her!  Great part!

Ooh, snippy Lily!  Picture books?  Really?  That's a little harsh.

(Totally random and off topic, but this story makes me miss my old library so much!  It was my favorite place, and the kids books were in the basement.  During the summer I would ride my bike there, and it was cool and smelled of musty books down there, and I would disappear to far off places for hours.  When the city tore that old building down they took a part of my heart with it.)

So, why would James be researching Lupis?  (And loved the "wolf" part. :)

OOoh, I sense a shift in the wind.  She's starting to like him. :D

Lily reads fantasy novels!  YES  I love it!  Little Miss Perfect Evans isn't as prim as she thinks.

AH!  Remus is the one with Lupis.  That, my friend, is completely genius!  And James researching to help him.  It's JUST LIKE THE BOOKS, only in real life!  YOU ARE AMAZING!

Library priest.  nice.

I adore your "ah-ha" moment of Lily realizing she has become a idea, not a person.  And that James is real.  SO insightful!  Again with the brilliance!

“What would you like to take out?” she asked, maintaining a neutral expression.

 James set his books down. “These books, and…” He leaned closer, eyes glimmering. “The librarian.”
^ BEST PART EVER!

This fic was adorable!  It's my new favorite Lily/James piece EVER!  Totally going in my favorites!  Thanks for sharing!

Author Response

Thanks for another review! :D

Yes, The Music Man was exactly what I was thinking of when I wrote this one!  I'm glad that this made you think of it, and of Anne of Green Gables when I mentioned the Lady of Shalott, haha. :)

Lily is quite standoffish to James because he's totally ruining her aesthetic.  I agree--I end sentences with prepositions all the time, but it seemed like something that would get on this version of Lily's last nerve.  And James is quite a sneak indeed, though he didn't mean to be. :)

I love the library--and I'm sorry that your old one got torn down!  It's always really hard when libraries close.  Like losing an old friend. :/

Yes, she's definitely starting to like him. ;)  They will never not be together because they are one of my OTPs.  I like to draw parallels between whatever universe I'm writing about and the HP universe, so having Remus come down with Lupus seemed like a good parallel--although it is a really sad one.  And James is just helpful and loyal to his friends in any universe. :)

Lily will have lots of "ah-ha" moments as she starts to get to know James better--for instance, she's not as "strict librarian" as she wants to be, and that's okay. :D

Yep, took that one straight from The Music Man!  I giggled when I wrote it, but it just fit in so well!

Aw, thank you so much!

&hearts;Mallory

Wow!  

So, I'm not sure if I've ever reviewed anything of yours before, but I see how that was a mistake.  You have an amazing gift for using words.  I was reading this, seeing the way you had worded sentences and put out descriptions, and sitting there going - yep, this is a true writer.  You have that old "show don't tell" thing down to a fine art!  Makes it such a treat to read!

I guessed early on that this must be Amelia Bones, though I have to confess to not knowing much about her backstory or family.  I have purposefully NOT kept myself up-to-date on all the new information JKR has put out, or the Pottermore stuff.  I like a little room for imagination in my Harry Potter world.  So you could write these characters anyway you chose and I wouldn't mind a bit. :)  I do like how you are doing it, so keep up!

I have to admit to having a soft spot in my heart for Gideon and Fabian, even though we (or maybe it's just "I") don't know much about them.  In my head cannon they are twins, but I am quite enjoying this take on them as well.  And as a Fred and George girl I like that you can see small traits of the twins in these uncles of theirs.  

I'm intrigued to see where this story goes, though I can only guess it's going to end in more heartache, given what we know of cannon.  

Amazing writing!  Thanks for sharing.

Author Response

I have much to say about this story, but first...

"What was the point in being a wizard if Fred couldn’t be brought back? What was the point in magic?" - AMEN!  Why, why, why?  Why couldn't JKR fix this?  Of all the sad and tragic things that happened in the books, this one is the most wrong.  I still deny it every day and spend the majority of my fics trying to fix it.

Second thing - Oh how I wish it had worked!  That he could have broken the mirror and pulled Fred out!  (Can I request a re-write of this story, where it DOES work and then you go on to write a novel length fic of their adventures together.  Pretty please?  I can give you...cookies.)

Gah, what a story!  Tissues?  You owe me like an entire box or two!  Fred and George are my favorites.  I still get all tingly and happy whenever I see them show up in a story.  It absolutely devastated me when Fred died.  I'm not over it.  I'll never be over it.  And so I usually avoid reading fics about George "dealing" like the plague.  But for some reason I was drawn to this one.

You have an incredible talent for writing emotions, for drawing the reader in to exactly what your characters are feeling.  It almost killed me in this fic, but I still thought I should let you know how good at it you are.

I've seen this idea floating around the internet as well, but I've never read a story that someone made about it because I thought it would be heart-wrenching.

I was right.

Again, excellent story.  Amazing descriptions.  Emotions off the chart.

And George!  GAH!  I just need to hug him!  Fred too, because you know he wanted to get out of that mirror so badly!  (I still vote for that re-write and LONG story...)

I loved that Ron was the one to find him, that he just held him and they both cried.  Ron can be so much more than comic relief or a side-kick, and you know his heart is broken for Fred as well.

I don't know if it's a good or bad thing that George can take a bit of glass home with him to see Fred.  I'll pretend it's a good thing.  But I'm worried.

Thanks for sharing your incredible writing.

The bill for the tissues will arrive later.

I will bug for that Fred and George novel.  

- Farmgirl

Author Response

I have always thought that! What is the point?! Haha I'm glad that you could agree! I deny it as well, in my head Fred moved out of the way in time. 

I wish that it had worked as well :( Maybe I need to write another version of this where he does come out of the mirror? It'll make me so happy! I am writing it at some point for you! YES COOKIES!!

*gives entire crate of tissues* I'm glad that you gave this one a chance *hugs you*

Awww thank you so so much! And I'm sorry that it's so heartwrenching *hugs you tighter*

I'm going to pretend it's a good thing as well :D 

Awww yay! Keep bugging me! I will write it for  you! 

Thank you so so much! You are amazing!

Wow!  So dark and sad!

I know this story was supposed to be short and only 500 words, but it leaves me with SO many questions!  I want to know more!

Why did James kill Rose?  Why did everyone think Albus wasn't capable of love, was the black sheep?  What exactly happened?  I've never read a story where the Potter and Weasley kids aren't best friends running around having a great time together.  My brain wants to know how something so wrong could happen?

Your words make this a very stark, lonely, full of despair tale, but I'm pretty sure that was your intent.  I think it would be hard to write such a short story and inject so much emotion, but you did it wonderfully.

I feel so bad for Albus!  Stuck in prison, waiting for a brother to save him that seems to have no intention of doing it.  

Well done.  And now I need to go read something happy, LOL.

Author Response

I'm so tempted to do a short story collection about what caused James to do this, and having people work out that he isn't the golden child everyone assumes he is. 

There are so many questions! Albus looks up to James so much, so to him it made sense to cover for James. James definitely manipulated him into it.  

I wanted to have this quite dark, and make people feel sorry for Albus. It was quite hard to write it in just 500 words, so was definitely a challenge. 

I feel bad for him too, and a little guilty for making this happen. 

Thank you so much! :D

I had to click on this story when I saw the summary.  And I'm so glad I did.

This was so perfect!  And so true!  Poor Harry, who never really got to have a normal childhood, and then spends his adulthood in the spotlight.  You have zeroed in on the one thing that he stood out for being excellent at that HE was in control of.  And the one place he had always felt absolutely free.

It made my heart happy to see him find a bit of that joy again.  Not that he isn't happy with Ginny and the baby and a good life, but still...when he's in the air he's just Harry.  Not The Boy that Lived or the famous Potter - Just Harry.

Thanks for sharing!  Beautiful writing and a great little story.  Almost wish there was more of it so I COULD see that game with Harry and Ginny playing against each other. (hint, hint)

Author Response

Hey there! 

Thank you so much for stopping by to read this! 

I really just wanted Harry to be happy in this one and get a chance to do something he's always loved.

I may write a sequel down the road, but I'm not sure when. It's definitely on the list though! 

Thanks again for the review! 

~Kaitlin

Oh, I really loved this story!  It was so nice and refreshing to read about a sincerely NICE character!  I was so please with Justin and what he did, and the fact that he really likes Eloise and worked so hard to get her to see that made me smile.

I can totally feel Eloise's pain here.  Sometimes it can be so hard to believe that others can see beauty in you, either because bullies convince you otherwise, or you convince yourself.  I'm so glad that someone convinced her to see beyond that.

I love that she was good at chess!  It was so unexpected, but brilliant!  And it was fun to see two people starting off on a relationship in a realistic way - by doing something fun and getting to know each other better.

You have a great way with words.  The writing really painted a picture in my head of everything that was happening.  I felt the emotions of each character - I was sad and mad when Eloise was being picked on, I felt her fear that this might be too good to be true, and then her elation when she realized it really was real!  And I loved Justin's dogged determination.

Thank you for a great story.  I like your writing a lot and as soon as school is out and I have a bit more time, I will be back for more.

Author Response

Hey there!

I'm glad you enjoyed this story. Fluff is not my strongest suit, so this was a bit of a departure from the normal for me.

I think pretty much everyone has felt how Eloise does in this at least a time or two. I just wanted her to be understandable and someone most people could relate with.

I don't know why, but I've always imagined her as being a brilliant chess player.

I'm so glad the emotions came through. I was most anxious about conveying them properly. The reason I have a hard time with fluff is because usually the emotions come across as fake or overly dramatic, so I tried to work really hard to keep them real.

Thank you so much for stopping by to check this out! 

~Kaitlin

*sniffles like crazy - determined not to cry because I don't have tissues by me*

Dan, this was amazing!  I loved every word of it!  Your amazingly powerful description set the tone and painted a vivid picture, and then the heartfelt emotion you piled into the characters was just so perfect!  It pushed away all the fluff and crap that we so often dump into our fanfiction and got right to the heart of what HP is all about - family.  It really, really touched me and I wanted you to know that.

Thank you as well for returning to the roots of the Harry Potter world and writing Harry and Ginny.  They are a growing rarity in HP fanfic these days and I find myself missing them greatly.  

I love the idea of Harry keeping his parents up to date on his life, sharing things with them.  And I absolutely adored that Ginny was there as well, of her own accord, to speak to her mother-in-law.  Her realization that she now understands the concept of loving someone so much you're willing to die for them is a poignant full circle and really completed your story.

Glad inspiration struck you tonight and you wrote this little gem!  It's one of my favorites!

Author Response

Hi, farmgirl! Sorry I caught you without your tissues.

Thank you for all of the compliments. I wrote this on the spur of the moment, which is apparently the only way I can write lately. I'd love to claim that I had a master plan to keep the story stripped down and focused on their feelings, but the truth is that I wrote it so fast that I didn't have time to go into a lot of description. Family was the major theme, though.

I loved Harry's visit to Godric's Hollow in DH and I felt like he would have wanted to visit his parents again after the war was over. Ginny's visit added a little more depth to the story. Being the youngest of her family, Ginny wouldn't have been able to watch her parents tend to younger siblings. I've never felt like she would have really understood that bond between mother and child until she had children of her own.

I'm really glad that you enjoyed it. Thanks for the review and all the kind words. It means a lot!

I know this is going to sound weird, but I think the thing that struck me most about this story wasn't so much the plot of it (though that was stellar as always!) but rather the craft behind it.  You know I've been struggling with how to put into words what reading this made me feel, and so I hope I can express it now.

I think what you did here was amazing.  It's like you used a story made up of words to pay homage to all words and all stories.  The very essence of why we struggle to write and why words can be so very powerful was contained in this one-shot, wrapped and tucked neatly inside the plot - but also in a way, independent of the plot.  It really touched me, because I can relate to so much of it.  Some of my very best friends are found in books.  Fictional characters are often so much more real to me than real people.  It's not something I'm always proud of, but I do deeply understand the sentiment.

And while we are on the subject of words, I am once again in awe of yours!  You are so gifted with writing!  You paint a picture in my mind with the words that you chose and it's so amazing to me.  Everything flows smoothly and has such a beauty about it.  Seriously, I love your writing so much.  I really need to make time to read more of it.

This isn't the longest review, and for that I'm sorry, but I do hope you can realize that it's a very sincere one.  

Thank you for sharing your talent with the world. :)

Author Response

Hello!

It doesn't sound weird at all!  In fact, it's probably what I was aiming for in this story; my one-shots tend to be a lot less plot driven than longer stories and I really wanted to explore all I could do with the writing in this piece, especially with the conceit I chose to employ, so I'm really pleased you liked that.

I've wanted to write about books and writing stories as a conceit for a long time - I wrote the opening few lines of this fic without really knowing where I was going with it, but Albus seemed to fit it really well and I couldn't not use him.  I'm so pleased that you liked the way that I tried to pay homage to words and stories with this story.  Words really are so powerful and it's clear that they've touched everyone on this site, and I'm so happy you could relate to it.  I don't think it's something you shouldn't be proud of, if that makes sense - a lot of us find our truest friends in books, and I think that's what makes a real reader.

You're far too kind to me, and I'm blushing right now even reading this, but thank you so much for your compliments!  I was aiming to write something that could maybe be called beautiful in a way and I'm so pleased I achieved it in some measure.  Thank you so, so much for this beautiful review and I hope you know how much it means to me! &hearts;

How on earth did I never review this chapter?  That's just not right.  Not right at all.

Tanya, I'm seriously at a loss as to how to review this.  I wanted to give you one of those massive detailed reviews that you seem to excel at so well when you review my stuff, but as I read, I found myself unable to stop and make mental notes about all the parts I wanted to mention to you.  I was way, way too caught up in what was playing out on the page before me to do that.  

I've read this before, many times, actually, as you worked it over (and over, and over, LOL.)  But that doesn't matter.  I don't know how you do it, but when you take those thoughts and ideas and emotions you have and let them pour out onto paper, something magical happens.

This story is literally one of the best I have ever written.  Your Fred, your George...they are all I could ever hope and dream my beloved twins to be.  And Josephine is SO AMAZINGLING REAL!  How can you not love her?

The genius of this set up, making me laugh and love Fred in the first part - because he is just so FRED!  So perfect.  And then ripping my heart out in the next part.

Just so you know, I don't care how long it takes you to finish this story, I will be right here, waiting and begging for more, because this is THE ultimate Fred and George fic and nothing else I read can ever compare.

Now excuse me while I go have a good cry.

Author Response

But, wait!  She is still stuck in the portrait!  You can't just leave her there!  And I wanna know the whole story of how she got there!  It's intriguing and you left me hanging.  *pouts*

Okay, okay, I'll stop being demanding.  But, seriously, these questions will haunt me forever now...

Now on to the real review.

I have actually thought a bit about portraits and how they work.  How can a portrait of a person who died, continue to be them?  And have not only their memories, but personality to react to new things that happen.  Like, if couple married, and say the wife died, and he hung a portrait of her in his house, and then later her remarried...would that be awkward?  

So, a fic like this is very intriguing to me.  And then you throw in the fact that she is still alive!  WOW!  Talk about plot twist!  I liked it!

But the fact that she's a little hard of hearing and not getting her facts straight is HILARIOUS!  How on earth did you think of these great play on words?  You must have played the game Telephone a lot as a child!  

Giving Harry a box with "peas on earth" is nothing short of brilliant.  Again, how did you think of these things!

Thanks for sharing.  Thise was a great read and I really, really enjoyed it.

Now, go free Lady M from that portrait.  Or at least get her moved to a better spot in the school!  

- Farmgirl 
?

Author Response

Heeheehee!

How portraits work is sort of explained by Rowling on Pottermore, so I just stuck with what I know from there. She says that portraits are painted while the subjects are actually living, and enchanted by the artist to move and speak, although the degree and depth to which they interact with others is dependent on the original subject's power. Which is why the Headmaster/mistress's portraits are so much more helpful than the others might be.

The real key is that the portrait's personality is not a direct echo of the original subject, but rather, from how the subject appeared to the painter. 

So, yeah, odds are if a man hung up a portrait of his wife and then remarried, it'd probably be awkward.

The fact Lady M is, in fact, alive, is one that I've had in my head for YEARS! I've got another novel length fic that I'm working on which has a muggle girl get trapped in a portrait while defending a Queen. She didn't have a name or really much of a character until I accepted the challenge and got the word "Mondegreen". The word comes from a writer who misinterpreted a Scottish ballad and substituted the words "and laid him on the green" with "Lady Mondegreen." Combine that with the definition of Mondegreen, it just fit!

And since I didn't want to write about her during her time period (founders era), because that would be TOTAL SPOILERS for my other story, I decided to write her with one of my other OC's in the future as a portrait. That way I could just tease people a little bit with her story. Heehee. :D

The play on words were actually ALL mondegreen's that I actually have done in my life. Most of them were from when I was little (like: hostages vs sausages, or Jews vs. juice), but the "Peas on Earth" is completely from my Dad. He cracked that pun so many times that I finally gave it to him. He hasn't cracked that pun since. :)

I can't tell you whether or not Lady M gets freed or not...that would involve more spoilers. ;)

Thanks for reading hun! I really appreciate it!! (And I apologize for the ridiculously long response)
LL

You know, I really hate writing reviews.  

Which I'm sure is not the sentence you wanted this to start with.  But let me explain.

When I read something like this that is so incredibly good I can never find the words to express that, to tell the author exactly how amazing it was.  It feels like my pitiful little attempts always fall so far short of what the story deserves.

I hope you know that you have written a masterpiece here (not to mention a three-tissue-box story.)  This was so...so...  SEE, again with the not having the right words thing!

The emotions you portrayed were so beautiful to read, and I loved the snippets of Ron and Hermione's life you showed over time, loved that they weren't grand or amazing or fairytale like - but they were REAL!  

And your writing.  HOLY COW you have talent girl!  Every time I read your stuff I am in awe and then I sit there and wonder why I don't read your stuff more often because you are SO GOOD!

You say you don't write Ron and Hermione very often - well, I firmly believe that needs to change.  You are obviously brilliant at them.

Thanks for sharing such a touching, gentle, moving story.  Even if I knew what would happen at the end right from the start and knew it would break my heart, I had to keep reading.  I couldn't stop.  This was lovely and you have every right to be completely proud of it.

- Farmgirl

Author Response

It certainly wasn't a sentence I was expecting you to start with, but I honestly completely understand what you mean.  Sometimes I find myself just rambling in a review because there's so much that I want to say but I can't find the right words for it (your stories included); it's actually an enormous compliment to me that someone might feel like that about my writing!

I've actually read this review several times since you left it (I mean, I'm only just now attempting to respond, and it's December!) and I don't have the words to thank you enough for how lovely you are and this incredible review on my story.  This Treasure came to mean so much to me and I'm so pleased that other people felt something from it too - I don't even know how to respond to your compliments without just repeating thank you again and again!

I'm so pleased you liked the snippets I chose to portray of Ron and Hermione's life together - my aim in writing them was to show the small, seemingly insignificant moments that make up a relationship that are the things you really miss when it's over.  It's not the big moments that you wish you could have again but the little things that really make up this marriage and I'm so happy that readers have appreciated that and that they liked the scenes I wrote.

*flails* Again, with the undeserved compliments!  Ah, thankyouthankyouthankyou is just about all I can say to this!

I'll definitely consider writing them again in the future, if life ever allows me to actually write properly again - and thank you a million times for all the wonderfulness you've packed into this review, because you've made my day hundreds of times over! &hearts;

Just a heads up, I think that last two sentences of your chapter here might have been misplaced.  Do they belong back at the conversation with Fred?

So I have to say, I really don't like that Katherine is trying to do anything to please her father.  Didn't he kill her mother?  Does she know that?  I don't want him having any influence over her at all.

And I'm worried about this Quidditch game.  Something is going to happen to her, I can tell.

Now, George needs to be nice and tell her his name.  Or Katharine needs to get smart.  Pay attention to little differences...learn to tell them apart.  LOL

Author Response

Oh, George, that is just evil.  Brilliant, but evil.  Tell the poor girl your name!  She's smart, she's gonna figure it out if you don't, and I think this will turn around and bite you in the behind.

And I did feel so very bad for Katherine at the beginning here, when they broke her snow globe.  Poor girl.  And to find out her uncle died.  I don't think he killed himself either, and hope you answer that question in this story.  Also, what or who did he fail to rescue?  I'm intrigued.

So, her dad is a Death Eater.  That can't be good.  So many more questions.

I did notice a few things that make it hard to follow the story at times.  Sometimes your use of pronouns instead of names leaves people wondering exactly who is being spoken about, or doing the talking.  You might what to check that over.  Also, when you change POV or scenes, it would be helpful to put a break of some kind, so people can tell that it's happening.

Keep up the good work.  I shall keep reading, though I'm a slow reader, just so you know.

Author Response

I saw you mention this on the forums and thought I'd give it a look.  I'm always up for a story featuring the twins. :)

Very intriguing start!  You have left me with so many questions about Katherine and her background!  How do Gideon and Fabian play into all of this.  She can't be a daughter to either of them, or the hinted relationship between George and her eventually would just be a bit icky.  So, what is their relationship to her mother?  And poor Elizabeth!  Why was she killed?  How did she know her killer?  And how was Katherine spared?  Who did Katherine go to live with and how did she get there?

See, told you, questions.  Good stories always leave you with them.

I'm also excited to get a glimpse of the twins at school, see Hogwarts through their eyes.

Nice start!  Off for more.

Author Response

Eeek! 

I am so absolutely flattered that you've read and reviewed something of mine *blush* I mean I love your work, huge fan and to have you read something written by little ol' me means a lot, so feel free to read on and comment anything you feel necessary :) The story will answer all your question :) Thank you again for the review this made my week! Heck, it made my month! 

Ps: I'm editing the story so it'd mean a lot that if you found anything leave it in a review! :)

I can totally understand your chapter summary today.  It hasn't been a particularly good day in my world either. 

Also, I have to admit that given your story summary, I kind of figured things couldn't go all that well for Blaise and Abigail in this chapter, not of James is going to come into this story somehow. ;)

It's sad to see how full of stuff a life can be, and yet how empty just the same.  I had to read that book, The Great Gatsby in school...you know the one, the classic, and I hated it.  Because it was just so...empty.  No one meant anything to anyone else.  Poor Abigail's parents have set that up for her, and even though the silk is nice, I really do hope she finds more than just that.  You can tell she wants it...but she's going to have to work a little harder for it.

I thought your line about love and hate was really, really profound.  Makes you wonder about her parents, actually.  All that hate and animosity is probably just hiding the fact that part of them still cares for the other and they are way to proud and stubborn to admit it.

Great writing again.  You do have a way with characters and settings and moods and a very good attention to detail.  I was honored to be your review exchange partner!

Author Response

Yes, things were destined to go a bit sour, haha. Thank you for the lovely compliments and for writing this review!

First of all, I am SO sorry for how late I am with this review.  It's been a rough start of the new year for me and I'm behind on everything.  Trying desperately to catch up now.  I hope you can forgive me.

Now, to the review.  I also have to confess that I am not a big fan of Next-Gen.  I have a great love for the original characters but I have a harder time stretching it over to characters we know so little about.  I guess I'm just odd.

But I do think you have done a wonderful job of creating characters here.  I read the whole thing (until the very last section) thinking how shallow and rather stuck-up these girls were and wishing they would talk about something other than clothes and boys.  Don't read that the wrong way - that's a compliment.  It takes a great writer to create characters so real they can annoy you!

And then you flip it around.  That last section peels away the layers and reveals that at least for Abigail, they are partly for show.  There is a real her hiding beneath them, yearning for more than clothes and money and popularity.  That adds so more to her and is the mark of great writing.  It's like a hook, to pull your readers in, but a very subtle and deft on.

Great writing, stellar characters, and pretty dresses.  What more could you want?

Thanks again for the review swap and I'm so sorry it's taken me such a long time!

Author Response

Hi! I'm glad you liked the characters, thank you for reviewing!!

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