|Review:||Toujours Padfoot says:|
She had been asked to be a joint Secret-Keeper for James and Lily, along with Sirius.
- WHAT IS THIS DEVELOPMENT. I am now putting it under a microscope. Does this...well this means that they won't know who the traitor was - Beth or Sirius. DOES BETH GO TO AZKABAN INSTEAD. Or maybe... Hmm... Maybe... I DON'T KNOW. BUT I WILL CONTINUE TO SQUINT AT THIS UNDER MY MICROSCOPE.
Your presence is urgently requested at headquarters tonight, at eight o' clock. Please do not delay.
- Just reading that makes me anxious. I feel like the kid in class whose name is called over the intercom to go to the principal's office, and all the other kids are staring at me and saying "Ooohhhooohhh, what did you dooo. You're in troouubbblle."
Sirius's cold is the least of his worries. Beth is going to take his Pepperup Potion and stuff it up his nose. Or Transfigure him into a kite and let the wind beat him up for a little bit. I fear for his safety.
"If you knew so much, your aim was - what, to get us to deny it? I'm not denying anything."
- AND THIS IS THE MOMENT WHEN I DECIDE I AM SHOVING BETH OUT OF THE PICTURE AND RUNNING AWAY WITH HIM FOREVER. Oh my goodness, I love that! Indignant and stubborn, just standing there looking Dumbledore right in the eye all defiant-like, being all, "This is my woman. Suck it, yo."
He really kept his cool in there, despite the fact that Dumbledore is literally his master's biggest enemy, his biggest threat, and loyalty would probably dictate that if he got such an opportunity, he blast Dumbledore into teeny pieces. But then the part where Beth could feel his heartbeat in his hand, racing just as fast as hers, reminded me of just how human he is and everything that's at stake for him right there in that room. There is no way he is going to go home that night and not fear for his life and Beth's life and basically ever sleep soundly again.
I am really, really worried now, with those details at the end. She told him it was worth it, but he didn't seem so convinced that it's worth the risk of putting her in danger. He doesn't even so much care about himself as he does about her, which makes me love him all the more, but I think things are already transpiring inside his head. Things that will not be good for Beth. I am getting the feeling that he is about to go do something very stupid.
I'm worried about how Dumbledore's going to treat Beth now, too. Will he trust her? Will he still assign her missions? Is Beth going to figure out that Sirius was the one who exposed them? Is Beth going to be allowed to sit in on Order meetings and is anyone else going to find out? Does Dumbledore know that Severus told Voldemort about the prophecy? Or does he just suspect because he knew some stranger was listening in on his conversation with Trelawney? Maybe he'll use Beth's association with Severus to his advantage, and try to turn him into a spy now? MUST KNOW EVERYTHING NOW.
I am so scared to read the rest of this novel. I've been sitting here frozen ever since Dumbledore and his cold, flat eyes came into the equation, civil and severe and making harsh comments about Severus's mark and, sdkfjsdfj. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH MORE I CAN HANDLE. I want Severus to realize that this is worth it, especially when it comes to him of all people, who has known so little love in his life. But since I know things about future plotty bits, you've got my nerves tangled up in a knot right now. Sirius already told him that if he hurts her in any way, he'll destroy him. So if Severus goes and tries to break things off with her, there is going to be chaos everywhere.
Every single week you make me have a nervous breakdown.
-lies unconscious on the floor, babbling nonsensically-
Author's Response: I am very pleased with your squinting in the first paragraph, mostly because -- well, you've hit upon something else no one else seems to have, as of now. ;) The end of Breaking Even goes through November 1981, so I'll leave it up to you all to wonder what sorts of accusations are going to be slung around! That letter would intimidate me too, though, no joke. (I feel, though, like having Pepperup Potion shoved up your nose would be massively painful. Maybe it's just me.)
LULZ, YOU RUNNING AWAY WITH SNAPE. ♥ I'm going to say something honestly: I wrote Cedric for people to project romantic fantasies on him, basically, but I never imagined that the same sort of thing would happen with Snape in anyone's case. :D And that makes me positively delighted, if I may be frank! It kind of gives me hope that I know how to write a proper romance still, one that isn't fraught with awkward looks and pauses and things people refuse to say.
But you're right; he's really not convinced it's worth it. He wants to keep Beth, but he wants to keep Beth SAFE even more, and that's the eternal struggle for Severus at the moment (which, of course, we see at the end of the next chapter too, because apparently I feel the need to drill it into people's heads). There's so much fear and uncertainty and Severus, who's never been loved like this before, doesn't know if it's something that can last amidst the world they're in. Which is where stupid things come into play: He doesn't get what's going on. :(
My lips are sealed on mission work. That comes into play in book 3! (I always forget that where I'm at in writing is father along than where people are reading. Oops.) All your questions, I think, are going to be answered in the first few chapters of Breaking Even -- except for your one about Severus and Dumbles, which will be answered after the queue closure. :3 YOU'LL KNOW SOON ENOUGH, I PROMISE.
I'm scared to post the rest of this novel, I think. I hate change, I hate endings -- and the end of Sneth, of EVERYTHING, just seems so close now. It was one thing when I had the idea for a trilogy and was starting out and everything, but I'm already almost a third of the way done with the last book. Woah. That just hit me. I am 7/9 of the way through with THE ENTIRE PLOT.
-babbles nonsensically alongside you-
Thank you for sticking with me the entire way. You have been here from the very beginning, before I set fingers to keyboard to write this. That means so, so much more than I can ever put into words. :)