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The Secret Keeper's Mistake by Sarah_Lily_Potter

Format: One-shot
Chapters: 2
Word Count: 2,316

Rating: 15+
Warnings: Mild Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature, Sensitive Topic/Issue/Theme

Genres: Drama, Romance, Action/Adventure
Characters: Dumbledore, Lupin, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew
Pairings: Sirius/Lily, James/Lily

First Published: 01/17/2011
Last Chapter: 01/17/2011
Last Updated: 01/17/2011

Summary: I wrote a million summaries but I think it’s better to just read it without knowing. Otherwise it ruins the story.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, they belong to J.K.Rowling. Please don’t send me hate mail if you do not like what I have done to certain characters.

Chapter 1: The Ultimate Betrayal
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Chapter One: The Ultimate Betrayal.

The moonlight glinted on the lake. It was the last night at Hogwarts, the last night forever, and instead of being happy; of looking into the future, Lily Evans felt as though her life were ending. Saying goodbye to Hogwarts meant that she was going to have to make serious changes to her life. Especially now that James Potter had proposed, only hours before. It had been in the Great Hall, at their final feast. Dumbledore had just finished his speech and was about to call for the food when James stood up, looking uncharacteristically nervous. He grinned across the table at Remus Lupin who grinned back.

“Can I … uh … say something, Professor?”

Dumbledore smiled. “Of course, James.”

Dumbledore took his seat and indicated that James should come to the front of the room.  All eyes were locked on James. James smiled at Lily. “Come with me? You are Head Girl after all.”

Lily stood up and followed James to the front of the hall. ‘So this is all some Head Boy stunt? Stunt? Wait, this isn’t a stupid Marauder thing is it?’ She glanced over at Sirius who looked as bewildered as she did. He shrugged.  She stood next to James, aware of all the eyes on her.

“Um … “ James began. He cleared his throat. “Okay, so we’ve had so many great times here … and tonight is the night we seventh years say goodbye to Hogwarts and the lives we’ve led here … forever. And while there are so many things I would like to keep with me forever, there is just one thing I am unwilling to give up …” James dropped to his knee and the whole school gasped. “Lily Evans …”

Lily glanced at the teacher’s table and saw all the smiling faces. Saw Dumbledore looking happier than she ever remembered seeing him. She glanced at the Gryffindor table; Peter Pettigrew’s smiling face, Remus’ huge grin, the look of confusion on Sirius’ face. Was James really proposing to her? Here, now? She found Severus Snape’s eyes in the midst of the Slytherins. They were narrowed and locked on James. Lily turned away from everyone; locked eyes with James.

“… will you marry me? It would make me happier than you could ever imagine.”

Lily sank down in front of him, kissed him gently and said, as loud as she could, “of course James!”

The Great Hall had exploded into loud cheering and applause. She grinned at everyone. Part of her could never have been happier, but there was something deep down, that didn’t feel right. She knew what she had to do.


The sounds from the Great Hall died down and the silence down by the lake took over. Lily had returned to reality, and it was time to do one of the hardest things she had ever had to do. She took a deep breath and looked over at the boy she loved. One of the boys she loved. She watched as he skipped a stone across the lake. She took a deep breath, mentally preparing herself for what was to come. ‘C’mon, Evans … man up.’

“Okay Lily, you owe me an explanation … I know I never asked you to dump the guy, but marrying him? That’s taking this affair thing way too far.”

“We have got to stop this. I’m in love with James. I’m marrying James. I can’t see you anymore. It’s over,” Lily said with conviction, but her companion barely seemed to care.

“Over? Look, sweetie, if you really loved James, why have you been snogging me for the last hour? The last two months. You know I’m in love with you. I’d never hurt you.”

Lily looked incredulously at Sirius Black. “You are James’ best friend, for Merlin’s sake! You aren’t supposed to make moves on the woman James intends to marry! Besides, you’ve made that promise to a hundred women, Sirius. As for why I’m snogging you? I haven’t the foggiest. I guess I’m just afraid to commit to James …” she sighed.

Sirius brushed a strand of hair away from her face. “I have never promised anyone anything I didn’t mean. I only make promises I intend to keep. And you, my dear, I’d keep forever. Marry me instead?”

Lily allowed the tears to flow freely, feeling them sting her eyes as they made their escape, and scorched her cheeks as they rolled down her face. “Sirius, I love you. More than you could ever know … but … I can’t. I made a promise to James. And I love him too. I’m going to be with him forever … I can feel it. I’m making my choice.”

Sirius laughed without any humour. “You picked him so that it won’t destroy the friendship he has with me. It’s the easy way out.”

Lily shook her head. “Don’t. Just … don’t Sirius. I love you both and it’s tearing me apart.”

“So that’s it then? It’s over? You’re tossing me aside? For him? What about all those times we …”

“The shagging? Believe me, I’m never going to forget them. But … I have to believe this is the right choice … I need to believe it …”

“It’s the worst mistake you’ve ever made, Lily. And I’ll never forget this moment.” Sirius turned away from her.

“Please don’t go …” Lily whispered. “I …”

“You made your decision. I wasn’t it. I’ll play your game; I’ll act like nothing happened. But don’t expect me to ever be ok with this. James will never know about how we stabbed him in the back, screwed him over …”

Lily sank to the ground as Sirius walked away. She began to shake, and then suddenly she was sobbing, loud and violent sobs. She didn’t know how much time had past, but slowly she got up and dragged herself to Gryffindor tower. She was grateful that all of Gryffindor had gone to bed early tonight. She met no one as she climbed the stairs and snuck into her dorm, dropping onto her bed fully dressed.


The next morning Lily gathered her things, and dragged her trunk into the common room. James, Peter and Remus stood talking. They turned as she emerged at the bottom of the staircase. James grinned and ran a hand through his already messy hair. Lily slowly made her way over to them.

“Lily, have you noticed anything weird going on with Sirius lately? Like a secret girlfriend or something? He came in late last night and if I didn’t know him better, I’d say he was heartbroken. But that’s crazy.”

Lily’s eyes widened at James’ words. “What? But it’s Sirius, he’s never loved anyone … well except you guys … I’m sure he’s fine.”

“He loves you too,” Remus told her.

“What?” Lily gasped.

“You’re one of us now … and we’re all family,” Peter explained. “So of course he loves you too.”

“Oh … yeah, I guess,” Lily muttered. “Well I’m sure he’s fine …”

“Who’s fine?” Sirius asked, joining the conversation.

“Um …” Peter began.

“You,” Remus and James said at the same time.

“’Course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Lily felt her heart begin to beat again. Sirius had said it himself, he was fine. He looked as though he hadn’t slept, he was avoiding her gaze, but he was fine. Wasn’t he?

James smiled, relieved. “You just seemed like such a sad git last night when you came in …”

Sirius frowned. “Excuse me? A ‘sad git’ … I’m sorry, but we can’t all be wearing stupid grins like you. We aren’t all marrying our true love …”

“Uh, what James meant to say was that you looked really depressed last night …”

“Yeah? Well I wasn’t. I’m fine. I’m just tired … and I’m gonna miss this place.”

“Aren’t we all,” Remus agreed sadly.  

“I spose we’d better leave …” James muttered.

Suddenly it had hit all the Marauders, Lily included, that these were their final moments at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. None of them felt quite ready to leave.

“We’ll all stay in touch, of course,” Remus said.

“Of course,” James agreed.

Sirius hesitated for a moment, his eyes on Lily, but then a smile broke out on his face. It was the first genuine one Lily had seen since before she had ended things with him. “Nothing could keep us apart. We’re the Marauders. Everyone else can piss off!”


Chapter 3: The Secret Keeper's Mistake
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Chapter Three: The Secret Keeper’s Mistake

Albus Dumbledore cleared his throat. “So I have some bad news …”

Lily felt her heartbeats speed up. “What is it?”                            

“There’s been a prophecy. About a child born in July … he’s to be the downfall of Voldemort.”

Everyone winced. James cleared his throat. “Do you mean …”

“There is a possibility that it is your child. There’s another possible child … but we need to take precautions. And right now you are going to need to move. I’ve got the location, Godric’s Hollow. It’s a muggle village. It’s a good village. You’ll need a Secret Keeper, so that your location is not revealed to or by anyone.”

James and Lily held each other. Neither of them wanted to move, but they knew they had no choice. If they wanted to keep baby Harry safe, they had to do whatever Dumbledore told them to do.

“About the Secret Keeper …” Albus began.

“Sirius,” James stated.

“Are you sure?” Lily asked.

“He’s my best mate. He’ll never tell anyone. He’s the best one to be given this task.”

Lily frowned.


“You cannot be our Secret Keeper, Sirius,” Lily hissed.

“Why not? Don’t you trust me?”

Lily shook her head. “It’s not trust that’s the problem. It’s our complicated history.”

“What? I can’t keep you all safe because whenever I look at you I can’t help thinking about how I want to shag you?”

“Exactly. Something might happen.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Look, I’m the best choice you have.”

“Tell James you changed your mind. Or I’ll tell Dumbledore to find someone else.”

“Fine. Find someone else. I’m not letting James down …”

“If he only knew …” Lily muttered.

“You’d be out on the street too …” Sirius retorted.

“I hate you!”

“Not as much as I hate you,” Sirius replied smoothly, sidling closer to Lily. He brushed a strand of hair away and tilted her face up to his.

“Oi, Lils, come help me carry the tea in …” James called from the kitchen.

Lily awoke from her trance and jumped away from Sirius. She shot him a filthy look. “See what I mean? I need space from you.”

Sirius put his head in his hands. “Tell Dumbledore to find someone else then … like I said, I can’t say no to James … make Dumbledore do it for me …”


“Albus, I cannot have Sirius Black as the Secret Keeper. It’s going to cause more trouble. Besides, if you think about it … whose more obvious than Sirius as Secret Keeper? He’s the best mate. Who do you think You Know Who – Voldemort – would torture first?”

Albus frowned. “Then who?”

“Well I guess Remus is a pretty obvious choice too …”

“You aren’t protecting them by choosing to find someone else …” he replied.

“I know. They’re okay with the idea of fighting Voldemort though … I’ll just pray they never get captured. Honestly, I need to protect my son. So I need a Secret Keeper that no one will consider.”

“I’ll come round tonight and we’ll talk it through with James …”


“Who else is there though  …” Lily asked.

“I offered myself,” Albus replied.

“With all due respect, Albus, I can’t ask you to do that … you have enough to think about already,” James insisted.

“I know!” Lily exclaimed.

Albus and James turned to look at her.

“Well?” James asked.

“Think about it. Someone who never really seemed like a close friend. Someone quiet enough to go unnoticed. The final marauder …”

“Peter!” James shouted. It’s perfect. “We’ll move in to Godric’s Hollow and Peter will be our Secret Keeper.”



“So, Sirius, don’t tell anyone you are no longer Secret Keeper. Not even Remus. You are fully aware that you may be tortured for information, yes?”

“I’m aware. I don’t care. As far as He will know, I’m dying to protect their secret.”

“Then it is settled. Peter Pettigrew, do you agree to my terms? No one is to know the location of Lily and James Potter. No one is to know you are their Secret Keeper.”

“I agree.”



*** Two Years Later ***


Sirius Black sat in a cell in Azkaban prison. He was there for the murder of Peter Pettigrew and for giving information to Voldemort. Of course, none of it was true. And Dumbledore knew that, but that hadn’t stopped Sirius being locked up. Peter had managed to escape Sirius’ revenge. He’d gotten Sirius arrested for murdering him. The coward wasn’t even dead. And the Wizarding World thought that Sirius was a murderer and that he had betrayed his best friend. Although, in all honesty, he had, just not in the way they thought. He had had an affair with Lily. And if he hadn’t he’d have been the Secret Keeper. He’d have kept them safe. In a way, he really was responsible for their deaths. He violently swiped at the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. He sighed. “I killed Lily and James Potter ... it’s all my fault,” he whispered.

He punched the brick wall of his cell, hating himself, wishing he could have died instead of them. “I killed them!”

“I KILLED LILY AND JAMES POTTER!” he screamed angrily.

The inmates around him cheered loudly.
“Shut up,” he hissed.

He dropped to the floor, a pathetic mess. “I loved them both so much … and now they are dead … because of me … I murdered them.”

He curled up in foetal position and began to cry, wishing that he could go back in time and make himself a better person.

“I’m so sorry …” he whispered to the floor, unable to lift his head. “I’m so sorry.”