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Rain by Ravie_girl29

Format: Short story
Chapters: 6
Word Count: 4,876
Status: WIP

Rating: 15+
Warnings: Mild Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature, Contains Spoilers

Genres: Romance, Angst, AU
Characters: Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny
Pairings: Harry/Ginny

First Published: 06/27/2010
Last Chapter: 11/17/2011
Last Updated: 11/17/2011

Summary:




One month. A month to live. A month to die. A month to say good-bye to everything he's ever loved


Chapter 1: Prolouge
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Should I tell her? The question burned on his brain all day. Could he tell her? Was it fair to keep it from her? A lump rose in his throat as he looked at her. She had her back towards him, looking out the window, it was raining, she loved the rain, something he never understood, to him it was cold and foreboding, but she said it made everything new. Her long red hair cascaded down her back. He turned to leave but she must have heard him, she turned around beaming.
 

“You're home early!” she smiled, running over to him and hugging him. “I thought you had to work until ten tonight.” she said.

 

“Um...” he said, dread filling his stomach, “It..er..., it turns out they didn't need me, quiet night, so...yeah.”

 

“I already ate, if I would have known you were coming home...”

 

He cut across her, “It's okay, I'm not hungry.”

 

“Harry,” she said, her head moving to one side and eyebrow kinked in worried curiosity, “Are you alright?”

 

He was about to say fine, but the word caught in his throat. She needed to know, but wouldn't it be better for her, better for both of them if she could just enjoy the rest of their time together? His eyes searched her, resting on her swollen abdomen, why now? Why couldn't this happen without having a child dragged into it? It was going to be hard enough if it was a clean break. She looked at him, her brown eyes growing more worried by the second.

 

“I'm...I'm okay.” He lied, “Just really tired, I didn't sleep well last night.”

 

“You sure that's it?” she asked.

 

“Yeah.” he said, “I'm going to go upstairs, tell me if anyone Floos.”

 

“Okay.” she said, still looking confused, even slightly hurt. It felt like a knife stabbed Harry's chest, he hated hurting her, but he knew he was about to hurt her worse then anyone ever could.

 

“I love you.” He said, kissing her cheek.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

He walked up to their bedroom, leaving Ginny standing confused in the living room. When he was in his bedroom he shut the door, locking it. He slowly fell to the floor running his hands through his hair. What should he do?

 

His arm began to throb, he pulled off his jacket. White bandages still wrapped his left arm where he skimmed the cursed object. But he knew under them his skin looked black and dead. He wished, possibly for the first time in his entire life, that Snape had been there. Snape had been able to give Dumbledore a year, the healer was only able to give Harry a month, two at the most.

 

I'm so sorry,” she had said, “If there was anything else I could do, I would. You should probably go home and prepare your wife.”

 

Part of him wished he would have just died, verses having a month of lying and dread. If he would have been alone, dying wouldn't be as bad. For all the times he came so close, it would have just meant his luck finally ran out. But he had Ginny, the girl whose meant everything to him; their unborn baby, yet another child who would have to grow up without a father; Ron and Hermione, his best friends through all the hell their teenage years had thrown them in; the Weasleys, his real family now; even Teddy was old enough to remember him now.

 

Maybe he could run away, leave a note and disappear, none of them would need to watch him die. As soon as the thought accured to him he banished it, he knew that would be unfair, it would drive Ginny crazy and she would never stop looking for him.

 

“God, help me.” he sighed. He let out a breath and go up. He could still hear the tapping of the rain on the roof.

 

One month, it didn't seem like nearly enough time. He wanted years, decades. He unlocked the door and lay on the bed. The rain slowly put him to sleep.

Author's NoteDon't hate me, I'm in a very dark and twisty mood lately. Please commet and I hope you come back and read the next chapter, please review, I would say no flamers, but if you must don't be to mean

Lily


Chapter 2: Telling Hermione
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  Harry sat in the Kitchen of his godfather's house. Waiting, there was a knock on the door, but Hermione let herself in before anyone could answer it. 
 

  "I'm in the kitchen." Harry called. Hermione walked in looking even more confused then Ginny had the night before.

 
  "Hey," She said, "Why aren't you at work? Why was it so important that I come here right away?"

 
  Harry stood up walking over to her, gently putting his hands on her shoulders and looking her straight in the eyes. 

 
  "Hermione, I need your help," He told her, "and I need you to not freak out, and I need you to keep this between you and me."

 
  "Okay." she said. 

 
  "No, you have to promise me, what I'm about to tell you, you won't breathe a word, especially not to Ginny."

 
  "Harry, you're scaring me, what's going on?"

 
  "Promise me, Hermione." Harry pressed.

 
  "I promise."

 
  Harry nodded, he's knew Hermione well enough to know she wouldn't lie, to know she wouldn't tell anyone no matter how much she would want to. That's why he went to her instead of Ron or any of the other Weasleys. He took off his jacket and started unwrapping the bandages around his arm. The second his black, dead skin appeared Hermione gasped, grabbing his arm and pulling it closer so she could have a better look. 

 
  "What the hell happened?" she demanded. 

 
  "Curse." Harry said simply. 

 
  "You need to go to the hospital!" 

 
  "I've already been there." He told her, "There is nothing else they can do. Hermione 
do you remember how I told you Dumbledore really died, putting on the cursed Horocrux?" 

 
  Hermione's brown eyes filled with tears of understanding, "No, we destroyed them all, no..."

 
  "Voldemort wasn't the only wizard who knew curses."

 
  Hermione understood instently, backing away. "H-how long?"

 
  "A month, maybe two." Harry told her. 

 
  Hermione threw her arms around him, sobbing into his shoulder. Harry held her, rubbing her back and letting her get it all out. He knew he couldn't cry, he promised himself when he found out that he wouldn't cry, he had to be strong, if nothing else for his friends.

 
  "I need your help." He whispered his voice tight. "Ginny can't know about this."

 
  "Harry..."

 
  "Please don't argue with me on this."

 
  "She's going to find out eventually."

 
  "I know." Harry said, "But not for a while, at least a month, I don't want her to worry." 

 
  "About her husband dying?" Hermione demanded. "It's not fair to her..."

 
  "A month of dread isn't fair to her either." 

 
  "Harry."

 
  "Hermione." He took a breath before he lost his temper. "Please, just understand my point of view here. Whether I tell her or not it won't change anything why have her worrying when she could just enjoy the time we have left together."
 

  "Because she should be prepared. If Ron was dying I would want to know." 

 
  "Hermione, you promised." 

 
  She sighed; Harry could see the pain in her brown eyes, "So why did you even tell me? If it's so much better to stay in the dark, why didn't you give me that luxury?"

 
  "Because I need you to help me." He told her, "I need to make sure all my affairs are set in order. I don't want Ginny to have to deal with anymore then she has to." 

 
  Hermione nodded like she had a lump in her throat, “I’ll help.” She said, tears now streaming freely down her face. “But I still think you should tell Ginny.”

 
  “Please don’t tell her.” Harry whispered. 

 
  “I won’t,” said Hermione. “I’ll be here tomorrow to help you.” 

 
  “Thank you.” Harry said.

 
  Hermione started to turn away, but stopped; she turned and ran into Harry’s arms again, collapsing so Harry had to support almost all her weight. She buried her face in Harry’s shirt. Harry rubbed her back. 

 
  “You’re my best friend.” She cried, “What am I going to do without you?”

 
  Harry kissed the top of her bushy head, and hugged her, “I’m sorry,” he murmured, “I’m so sorry I have to put you all through this again, I wish there was a loophole this time.”

 
  “It’s not your fault.” Cried Hermione, “And I understand, it’s just so unfair.”

 
  “I know.” Harry whispered. “Thank you,” he said, “Incase I forget to tell you again, thank you for everything you’ve done for me the past eleven years, I can never repay you for that. I could never imagine better friends then you and Ron.”

 
  “Are you going to tell Ron?” She asked.

 
  “No,” Harry said, “Not yet.” Hermione nodded, Harry knew she knew the answer before she asked the question. Harry didn’t know how long he held her, but soon it dawned on him that she wasn’t the girl he wanted to be holding. “I’m going to go home to Ginny, I want to spend all the time I can with her.”

 
  Hermione nodded, "I understand." She kissed him on the cheek, "I-I'll see you tomorrow."


Author's Note i dont love this chapter, but i hope you like it, please review

Chapter 3: Rows
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  When Harry got home Ginny was humming to herself folding up the laundry. Teddy was asleep on the couch; Andromida must have had to go out.
 
  "Another quiet day?" Ginny asked barely looking up, "You Auror's are going to die of boredom."
 
  "I just wanted to spend time with you." Harry said, "Is that okay with you?"
 
  She smiled, "Of course it is." She beamed. A lump rose in his throat again, how could he tell her? She was so happy. She skipped over and kissed him, unlike Hermione's peck which made his cheek twinge in guilt, Ginny's kiss made his entire face burn in guilt.
 
  He pulled away slightly awkwardly, faking a smile.
 
  "So how long is Teddy here for?" He asked.
 
  "Just until four," Ginny told him smiling, "He's going to be so happy you’re home, he's wanted me to bring him outside since he got here."
 
  Harry looked at the sleeping child on the couch, his hair was light purple, his eyes moving rapidly under his closed lids.
  "I wonder what he's dreaming about?" Harry asked, more to himself then anyone else.

  "I don't know," Ginny said, "what did you dream about at that age?"

  "My parents." said Harry simply.

  Ginny looked sympathetic, "Tonks and Remus would have been such great parents...at least he has us, and Andromida," she told him, "and soon he'll have a little god brother or sister."

  "Yeah," Murmured Harry, guilt welling in his stomach. One more fatherless kid in this world, one more kid that will grow up dreaming about what his dad might have been like. Harry put his hand on his godson's head.

  "I'm thinking of having Fleur bring Vicky over here so they can play," Ginny said, "I really don't want to have to put up with Fleur for an entire day, but it'd be nice to have another kid he can play with around."

  "I suppose." Harry answered.

  "Okay, what's the matter with you?" Ginny demanded, frustrated, "You're never this quiet, especially when it comes to talking about Teddy."

  "What..." Harry looked up surprised, he was always baffled when Ginny went from a perfectly conversational mood, to being cross and yelling, something that's been happening more and more since she got pregnant. "nothing's the matter, I'm fine. Just tired."

  "Don't lie to me," Ginny scowled, "You slept fine last night, and you can't blame it on a hard day at work! What's wrong? What's bothering you? You can tell me."

  "Nothing..." Harry started, but knowing Ginny would just get crosser if he pretended nothing was wrong he decided to lie, "I got in a row with your brother, that's all, I was just thinking about what he said."

  Ginny instantly calmed down, "That's it? Just ignore him, he's a stupid prat anyways. What did you fight about?"

  "Oh, just stupid Ron stuff." Harry lied, "but I always hate arguing with him."

  Ginny shrugged, "You'll make up, you always do."

  "Yeah." Harry said. After that Harry tried being a lot more cheerful, giving at least more then one word answers. When Teddy woke up they went outside and played at the park, but he must have been doing a poor job in disguising his feelings because at dinner, Ginny snapped at him again. "You know if it's bugging you so much, just go and talk to Ron!"

  "It's not that simple." He murmured, into his food.

  "Well if you're going to sulk all night, then I'll just go to bed!" She told him, slamming her hands on the table and storming up the stairs, "You can clean up for a change!"

  "Gins..." But she was gone. Great. He knew he had to tell her soon, or there would be a divorce and a funeral on the same day, but every time he thought of how he was going to do it, he kept seeing her face, the look in it when Fred died. The words Dumbledore spoke to him so long ago rushed into his head; after everything you've been threw, i didn't want to cause you more pain.

Authors note, Italics are from the fifth Harry Potter book, they belong to JKR, not me. sorry it's taken me over a year to update this, i've been busy, but I've got it all writen out and will finish it soon, i promise

Lily


Chapter 4: Nargles
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   "Have you told her?" Harry sighed, every day Hermione asked him the same thing, every day his answer was the same.

 

  He decided to ignore her. "I wonder if it would be cheating to double my life insurance."

 

  Hermione gave a dry laugh, "I still don't understand what idiot would give you life insurance in the first place, but you didn't answer my question, did you tell her?"

 

  "Not yet." He said, picking guiltily at his fingernails. Three weeks had passed since Harry found out, but still every time he tried to tell Ginny, he choked. 

 

  "Harry, you could be down to only a week." 

 

  "You think I don't know that, Hermione!" He snapped, then looking over at his friend regretted it instantly. "Sorry." He murmured, then continued picking at his nails. It wasn't Hermione's fault, she was just trying to help him, he knew that. But he was feeling crappy enough without her consent pestering. Suddenly a sharp burst of pain went threw his arm, he grabbed it and let out a breath of pain before he could stop himself. Hermione was at his side in a second, her brown eyes frightened.

 

  "I'm fine." Harry told her quickly as soon as the pain subsided a bite. 

 

  "It's gonna happen more and more frequently now." She said, "The curse is started to escape the confines the Healers set, it's just going to get worse. "

 

 

 

  "I've had worse pain." mumbled Harry.

 

  Hermione sighed, obviously knowing he wouldn't budge, she handed him a stack of papers, "I'm finished," she told him heavily, "Everything is set. I have to get back to work, but if you need anything else, just call me, okay?" 

 

  "Thanks." Harry said, he could see from the look in Hermione's eyes that she wonder whether or not she'd see him alive again. That was not an easy thing for Harry to see, guilt clawed deeper at his belly. After she left Harry put the papers in his rucksack and started out onto the streets. He couldn't go home yet, Ginny was growing increasingly suspicious with his early arrivals home, so he decided walking around would clear his head. 

 

  As always London was busy, no body noticed him. At least, not until he ran into her. He had just passed a harassed looking woman walking several dogs and a couple making out in a phone box when he hit someone head on, causing her to fall backwards onto her bum.

 

  "Hello, Harry." Said an airy, un-bothered, unconcerned voice from the ground, "Fancy bumping into you."

 

  "Luna!" Harry said surprised, putting his hand out to help her up, but she didn't take it, she seemed perfectly content on the sidewalk, in fact, she was now observing an ant that wondered by, "I thought you were in Norway studying your...whatever it was you were studying."

 

  "Four eared snumple nuffers, they are quite fascinating." She said, "But I did get quite lonely at times, so I decided to come visit my friends here in Britain."

 

 

  "Er...okay." said Harry.

 

  "Something's bothering you, Harry." Luna said, unconcerned.

 

  For some reason Harry felt comforted from Luna, he didn't feel like lying to her. The words came out without him even deciding he could confide in her, but he knew instantly it was the right choice. "I'm going to die."

 

  "Of course you are, silly." Luna told him, nonchalantly. "Everybody is going to die." 

 

  "No," Harry said, "I'm going to die in a week."

 

  "That's to bad," said Luna as casually as if they were discussing tea flavors, "You're quite a good friend, I'll miss you."

 

  Harry wasn't sure whether to feel comforted or slightly insulted by Luna's lack of concern, it was a nice change from Hermione's looks of worry and sorrow, so he decided he would feel comforted. "I'm afraid." He admitted.

 

  "That's alright." said Luna, she was observing an ant that was crawling from one finger to another, "I would probably somewhat frightened as well, but dying is the most normal thing in the world, people do it every day."

 

  Harry sat down on the sidewalk next to her, "But I have Ginny, and a baby on the way, I could do so much more still."

 

  "Yes, that is unfortunate, but Ginny is strong, and your child will be strong. They will miss you, we all will, but they will remember you as you are, brave." 

 

  "I suppose." Harry sighed.

 

  "What did Ginny say when you told her?" Luna asked, conversationally, unlike Hermione's interrogations.

 

  "Nothing, I haven't told her yet." confessed Harry.

 

  "Why not?" Luna asked, "I imagine she might want to know."

 

  "I just can't tell her."

 

  "You told me." she pointed out.

 

  "You're easier to talk to this stuff about." Harry sighed.

 

  "Telling her would make you feel better." said Luna. She stood up, "Godspeed, Harry, I will miss you until we meet again."

 

  "Thanks, Luna." murmured Harry, "Oh, and can you do me a favor?"

 

  "Mm?"

 

  "Ginny's going to have a baby in about six months. Make sure they believe in Nargles."

 

  Luna smiled, she understood what he meant. "I promise, they will." 


Chapter 5: Truth
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  Hermione's and Luna's words seemed to resonate in Harry's mind as he walked home. He knew his time was running out. Whether he had a week left or a month, he was fast approaching the end of the rope. The game was almost up. As he walked through the door to his house he considered for the thousandth time what to tell Ginny. She was in the kitchen starting dinner. She didn't even turn around when she heard him.

 

  "Gin..." Harry started, but she cut him off.

 

  "Good, I was hoping you'd be home soon, look, we need to talk...." But what it was they needed to talk about, Harry never found out, for that moment pain worst then anything he had experienced in his life erupted like a bomb in his arm.

 

  Harry let out a cry of pain, he was only conscience long enough to realize he had fallen to the floor before he blacked out.

 

  When he came to, Harry had no problem at all recognizing a private room at St. Mungo's. He was in a bed, sun pouring in through an open window.

 

  No sooner did he wake up then did the door open very gently. Ginny stepped in. She wasn't crying, nor was there any signs that she had been. Her eyes were neither red nor puff, they were blazing and steady as ever. But Harry knew that the truth had come out. She gave him the same understanding yet somehow defiant look she had given him so many times before. She was not going to weep, Harry knew that, nor was she going to get angry that he had lied to her. She was not going to break down like so many others would in her position. She would not loose herself to sorrow. She would stand by him until the end, he knew that because he knew her.

 

  Yet despite this steady and strong composure of someone much older, she looked remarkably like the vulnerable little girl he had saved from the Chamber of Secrets so long ago.

 

  "The healers told me." She said simply, her voice very even, but her eyes cast down at her folded arms to avoid Harry's. "They said you've known for a while now."

 

  "I should have told you," Harry started guiltily, "I know I should have."

 

  "Why didn't you?" She asked, the slightest note of hurt creeping into her voice. "You told Hermione."

 

  "I..." He couldn't answer, at first, every reason he had kept his looming death secret from his wife seemed to slip away from him in that moment. "I was afraid." He admitted finally. "Afraid to leave you alone, afraid that telling you would make it real."

 

  She turned her back on him to look out the window. Harry could just see the side of her face, just enough to make out a single tear sliding down her cheek. But when she spoke again her voice still didn't break, there was a small sad smile on her face.

 

  "The man who killed Voldemort..." She murmured softly.

 

  "Becoming more like him every day." Harry said, bitterly. For the first time since she came in Ginny met his eye. She looked slightly surprised, but waited for an explanation, "That's the only thing Voldemort ever feared you know, his own death."

 

  "You're not afraid of dying," Ginny said, again taking her gaze away from him, "We both know you're to selfless for that."

 

  "Any you know what I'm feeling better then I do, I suppose."

 

  "Yes, I do." She said simply, she again turned to him. Then without warning, her composure broke, and she threw her arms around him and wrapped herself around him, crying softly and quietly into his shirt. Harry held her as close as he could with her swollen stomach. Yet another painful reminder of history repeating itself. Harry kissed Ginny's forehead.

 

  "I'm sorry," he murmured to her, "I'm so so sorry."


Chapter 6: Good-byes
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Ginny didn't cry again after that day, nor did Harry. But she stayed with him every moment. Hovering within inches of him like a satellite clinging to a planet that was about to turn into a black hole. Sometimes they would talk for hours on end uninterrupted. Other times they would just lie in bed and hold each other. But neither shed a tear over the inevitable.

 

 

The same could not be said of the steady stream of visitors in the days that followed.

 

 

Because of Harry's fame the hospital restricted the people allowed to see him to just the people he knew personally. Something that he was immensely thankful for because as it was he found it extremely tiring to put on a brave face even for just the people he loved. He would never be able to do if for thousands of strangers.




 

The day after he was admitted to the hospital Mrs. Weasley burst in sobbing. Her husband right behind her looking more miserable then Harry had seen him since Fred died. It took Mrs. Weasley a full hour before she could compose herself enough to talk. When she did, she spoke like a mother would to her son, not like a woman would to her daughter's husband. It made a lump in Harry's throat when he realized that though Lily died when he was a baby, he did have someone who loved him like a mother all this time.



 
 

When Ron first came in, they didn’t speak, they just looked at each other in perfect understanding. No word could have said as much as that moment did. Neither one of them were ready to say good-bye to their best friend, neither one of them were going to admit it. Naturally, Ron and Hermione were there more than anyone else other than Ginny. They left only at nights when visiting hours were restricted to immediate family. The rest of the Weasley brothers came, too. But none of them stayed long, Bill and George seemed to find it too painful to have a teary good-bye. While Charlie and Percy seemed to respect the little time their sister had left with her husband and didn't want to intrude upon it.




 

Despite the fact school was in session, Harry was not surprised when Hagrid showed up, blowing his nose on his tablecloth sized handkerchief. Harry was, however, surprised to see the collection of teachers that accompanied him, McGonagall among them.


 

 

Harry felt like he should have said more to McGonagall, who seemed to have been so much more for him then just a Head of House. But looking up at the old teacher all he could manage to say was, "Thank you. For everything."


 

McGonagall just nodded, her lips tight, and patted his shoulder, “Take care, Potter.”
 

 

Worse than any other visit, worse then all of them put together, was Teddy, who ran in with somber looking Andromida following behind him.



 
 

The young boy with tomato red hair jumped excitedly onto the hospital bed, thinking this was all just a big game.



 
 

"What's the matter, Uncle Harry?" The young boy asked, his head cocked in curiosity. "Is you sick? Like when I had the chickin pox?"



 
 

"Not quite, buddy." Harry told him. "It's a bit worst then the chicken pox."



 
 

"Well, when you gonna get better?" Teddy demanded. Harry exchanged looks with Ginny. Part of him was resenting Andromida for letting the child come in blindsided.


 

 

"I'm not going to get better, bud." Harry said. He could see Andromida crying, but Teddy didn't notice. He looked from Harry to Ginny and back again confused.

 
 

"But you promised you'd teach me how to ride a broom this summer." Teddy said, "How you gonna do that if you're in here?"


 

 

Ginny knelt down so she was eye in eye with Teddy; she took his small hands into her own. "Do you remember," She started gently, "When you asked us where your Mummy and Daddy were, and we told you they were up in Heaven with all the angels?" Teddy nodded as though he didn't know how that conversation was at all relevant to this one. "Well, that's where Uncle Harry's going." She continued, "Up to heaven to be with your Mummy and Daddy and all the angels."




 

"But...I don't get to see my mummy and daddy anymore." Teddy said, understanding slowly creeping over his young face, "Will...Am...I'm still gonna be able to see you, won't I!"



 
 

Harry felt miserable as he looked into his godson's eyes and knew he had to tell him the truth, "I'm sorry, Teds," He said, "But you won't be able to see me anymore either."


 

Teddy's face screwed up his face as tears quickly started falling, "But-but-but, I don't want you to go!" Teddy wailed, he pulled away from Ginny and hugged Harry around the neck, "Why can't you stay with me?"




 

"I don't have a choice, bud," Harry said, rubbing Teddy's back, "One day you'll understand."



 
 

"But-but I'm gonna miss you!" Cried Teddy.



 
 

"I know," Harry told him, "I'm going to miss you, too, so much.” Harry hugged him tight, for the first time he had to fight back tears, “But listen, because this is important." Teddy sat up looking at his godfather, wiping tears from his big blue eyes and snot from his nose. "You need to be a big boy for me, can you do that? You have to promise me you'll take care of Ginny for me, okay? Because she's going to need a lot of help when the baby comes. And when it does, you need to promise me you'll look after it like I looked after you, okay? Because if I'm not there it's really gonna need you. Do you understand? Can you promise me that?" Teddy sniffed but nodded.



 
 

"I-I pr-omise."




 

Harry hugged the small boy who was whimpering into his shirt.



 
 

"You're a good boy, Teddy," Harry said, "And remember, the ones who love us never leave us, I'll always be there for you, even if you can't see me."



 

Author's N0te: So, this chapter was written on a thirteen hour plane ride at about 1:00 am so if it makes no sense, I blame it entirely on my exhaustion. Please review, seriously, REVIEW! I know you can! It takes two seconds! Review, review REVIEW!!!!
 
 


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