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La fille aux yeux saphir by ClearCutDiamonds

Format: Novel
Chapters: 2
Word Count: 6,585
Status: WIP

Rating: Mature
Warnings: Strong Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Sexual Nature, Substance Use or Abuse

Genres: Drama, Mystery, Romance
Characters: Sirius, Regulus, Bellatrix, R. Lestrange, Lucius, Narcissa, OC
Pairings: Other Pairing, Lucius/Narcissa

First Published: 10/03/2009
Last Chapter: 12/17/2010
Last Updated: 12/17/2010

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                                          It isn't a pretty story...

Chapter 1: I.
  [Printer Friendly Version of This Chapter]

La fille aux yeux saphir by ClearCutDiamonds


    The handsome boy — or rather, the handsome young man lay on his large bed, which was covered by an emerald and silver bedcover. His dark hair fell in a casual elegance about his perfect face and he carelessly ran a hand through it, pushing it aside so that he could focus on what he was writing in an emerald green, leather-bound book. A quill was poised in his hand, he dipped it into a pot of black ink and paused a moment as if to gather his thoughts and began writing. The young man had strong cheekbones, a straight nose, clear porcelain skin, full crimson-colored lips and fathomless gray eyes framed by thick lashes — perfect, aristocratic features.

    Above him, a painstakingly painted crest covered the entire left wall, underneath it, the words Toujours Pur were carved and painted over in silver. Always Pure.

    The young man continued writing, his features were creased in confusion, his eyes focused on the relatively empty page before him. He frowned and crossed out what he had written with a clean stroke of his quill and started again.

    A knock sounded at the door and the boy, startled, dropped his quill and pushed his notebook aside.

    ‘Regulus,’ called the female voice from behind the door, ‘may I come in?’

    The young man, Regulus, stood up and adjusted his clothing. ‘Yes, mother,’ he replied, turning his back to the door and focusing on organizing his desk which was scattered with newspaper clippings, old quills, ink pots and sheets of parchment.

    The knob turned and the door opened to reveal a tall woman — Walburga Black. Her straight hair fell well past her shoulders in a dark sheet, her mouth was pursed, further pronouncing her high cheekbones and her blue eyes were hard. She did not move past the threshold and Regulus turned around.

    ‘Regulus,’ she said, ‘we’ll be leaving shortly, are you ready yet?’

    ‘Nearly,’ replied Regulus absentmindedly.

    Walburga crossed the threshold and reached his wardrobe in a few long strides. She pulled out a pair of Regulus’ dress robes and a silvery-gray shirt, turning back around, she handed them to him and left the room, shutting the door behind her.

    Regulus sighed and removed his clothing and began to dress with the clothes his mother had chosen for him, he'd realized long ago that it was better to just obey than to anger his mother. Fastening the buttons on his silk shirt, he pulled on his robes and made his way towards his door. He glanced fleetingly at his reflection in the mirror, he knew all too well the face that would be staring back at him. Regulus opened his door and made his way towards the staircase.

    His gaze stopped on the room across from his, the door still had the old nameplate on it, the nameplate that read Sirius. Regulus knew why it was still there. Sirius wasn’t mentioned in their house anymore. But, Regulus knew his mother still visited the vacated room in the late hours of the night, when she thought no one was watching. Despite her shame and anger, Sirius would always be the person she loved most. Regulus knew how much it killed her to burn off her first born from the Black family tree.

    Regulus always wondered what the price to pay for glory was. And the answer never came. Everyone kept secrets, and everything was best left unsaid in the Black house. Regulus pushed all thoughts of his brother to the back of his mind and hurried down the staircase.

    Walburga was waiting at the bottom of the staircase, dressed immaculately in an emerald gown with her long hair fastened into a tight bun.

    ‘Regulus,’ said Walburga, coming forward, ‘your tie isn’t straight, let me fix it.’ Before Regulus could protest, his mother was tightening his tie and handing him his travelling cloak.

    Regulus put his travelling cloak on hastily and secured the clasp. His father walked into the room and both Regulus and his mother turned around. Orion Black was dressed in robes of all black, his hair was combed like Regulus’ mother insisted it should always be, which only made the creases in his face which could be blamed on old age, more prominent. His large gray eyes — eyes that mirrored Regulus’ and Sirius’ stood out from his face.

    ‘Are we leaving yet?’ asked Orion in his deep voice.

    ‘Yes,’ answered Walburga quickly, gathering her cloak and clutch.

    ‘Where are we going?’ asked Regulus, his voice even.

    His mother turned around, meticulously buttoning her cloak, ‘To the Tallis’ home for dinner.’

    ‘Who are they?’ asked Regulus, if he was slightly bothered about not knowing where he was going or the people in which his family was visiting, he was careful not to show it.

    ‘Mister Tallis is the former French Minister of Magic,’ his mother answered, ‘he is English but, his wife, Gabrielle is French, they have just moved back to England, they’re part of our… our circle of friends.’

    Regulus frowned but said nothing.

    His mother was now assessing herself in the hall mirror, she smoothed down her cloak and turned around. ‘Can you apparate yourself, Regulus?’

    ‘Yes, mother,’ he answered.

    ‘Very well, we’ll meet you there,’ she said and his father stood.

    Regulus nodded.

    ‘Oh, and Regulus?’ asked his mother, turning around.

    ‘Yes?’ he asked.

    ‘Don’t…’ she trailed off, not bothering to finish her sentence. Regulus already knew what she was about to say, the same thing she always told Sirius before parties: Not to misbehave, or else. But, there was no need, Regulus had never been like Sirius. His mother was still adjusting and nervous about her social standing amongst purebloods, who still gossiped about the black sheep that was burned off the Black family tapestry. His mother bit her lip. ‘Never mind. The Manor is across from the Rosier Manor.’

    Regulus simply nodded, turned around and apparated, closing his eyes tightly, bracing himself for the familiar, uncomfortable sensation. It passed and he found himself standing in front of a grand dark wood door. He waited a moment and another pop sounded, his parents. He turned quickly to see his mother walking up the garden path, his father trailing behind.

    His mother approached and reached out a slender hand, her fingers encircling the knocker and knocked once. Not a moment later, a tall, slender woman, appeared in the doorway. Her bright blue eyes wandered from Walburga to Orion and finally to Regulus. A false smile was set on her face. Her long, pale hair fell in loose curls and her patrician features only increased her beauty. With a motion of her arm, she ushered the three Blacks inside and closed the door. Even though she was old enough to be his mother, Regulus was taken aback by her beauty.

    ‘You must be Walburga and Orion and Regulus,’ she said, her thick French accent was noticeable.

    ‘Yes,’ my mother answered, smilingly lightly.

    ‘It is so wonderful to meet you all,’ she said brightly, ‘I think Charles is just…’ she trailed off, waving over a tall man, his brown hair flecked with white, his wrinkles appearing as he smiled.

    ‘Charles, this is Walburga and Orion Black, and their son, Regulus,’ said Gabrielle to her husband.

    ‘Thankyou all for coming,’ said Mister Tallis, extending his hand towards Orion’s.

    The adults continued their light conversation and smiled falsely at each other. Regulus shoved his hands in the pockets of his robes, desperately wanting to be anywhere but where he was now. Another party filled with the same narrow people and the same mindless chatter. Regulus’ eyes travelled the room, he recognized several of his Slytherin House members: Evan Rosier, Lucius Malfoy, the Lestrange brothers, Rodolphus and Rabastan, Avery, Wilkes and his cousins Narcissa and Bellatrix and their parents scattered about, no doubt discussing the Dark Lord’s latest endeavors.

    Regulus turned back towards his parents, who were still in conversation with the Tallis’.

    ‘Oh, and my daughters,’ said Ms Tallis, gesturing behind her to two teenage girls who were approaching. Both girls were dressed in light pink dresses and had tall, lithe figures, long blonde hair that fell like silk down their backs, blue eyes that mirrored their mothers’, high cheekbones and pale skin, like porcelain. The two girls were obviously twins but, if you looked closely enough, their features were slightly different. But, perfect nevertheless. ‘This is Aurelie and Adeline… but, where is Rosalie?’ She directed the last part of her question to her daughters who shook their heads.

    Regulus, his hands still in his pockets, looked up through his thick dark lashes. Both girls were eyeing him appreciatively. True, Regulus was incredibly good-looking. In another circumstance, Regulus would have perhaps had his way with them, considering the looks they were giving him. But, in this case he was too preoccupied to consider it.

    ‘Aurelie and Adeline will be entering their sixth year at Hogwarts, they were previously at Beauxbatons. And my youngest daughter, Rosalie will be entering her fifth… I don’t know where she is at the moment, but I’m sure she will turn up…’ continued Ms Tallis.

    Aurelie and Adeline smirked at each other, but Ms Tallis didn’t notice, or just chose to ignore them.

    Regulus excused himself and wandered towards the drinks table and grabbed a glass of Firewhiskey, he enjoyed the warm burn in his chest as the amber-colored liquid went down. He pushed a persistent curl aside and turned around, his eyes wandering the crowds of people again. He spotted the group of Slytherins and made his way towards them.

    Bellatrix saw him first. ‘Well, well, well. Nice of you to show up, little cousin,’ she said, coming forward, Rodolphus at her side.

    Regulus nodded towards her, but said nothing. Lucius and Narcissa were talking quietly, their heads bowed. Evan, Rabastan, Avery and Wilkes came forward, all joining the new circle.

    Bellatrix pursued her lips, her heavily-lidded eyes trailing over the crowd. ‘Have you met the new members of our little assembly?’ she asked Regulus, who made an effort not to roll his eyes. The Slytherin elite's incredible exclusiveness and Bella's constant talk of superiority annoyed Regulus to no end.

    Regulus nodded absentmindedly, ‘Annabel and Anne, was it?’

    Bellatrix smirked, ‘Adeline and Aurelie,’ she corrected him.

    ‘Charming,’ Regulus replied, uninterested.

    ‘That’s so typical you, Regulus. Can’t even remember a girl’s name,’ said Bellatrix.

    ‘Ah, but I was close,’ he said, the trace of a smirk on his lips.

    His cousin rolled her heavily-lidded brown eyes.

    The topic of conversation changed and Regulus tuned out. His eyes travelled the immense room and his gaze locked with one of the twins. She touched her neck and flipped her long blonde hair over her shoulder. Regulus turned away, unfazed.

    ‘—rumored to be part Veela,’ said Evan, his eyes gleaming.

    ‘Who is?’ asked Regulus, faintly interested.

    ‘Ms Tallis and her daughters,’ piped up Rabastan, an evil glint in his eye. ‘What I would give to—’

    ‘Be quiet, Rabastan,’ chided Bellatrix.

    ‘Oh, Bella,’ said Rabastan, ‘don’t be jealous, Rodolphus is too whipped to cheat on you, anyway.’

    ‘Shut up,’ hissed Bella through clenched teeth.

    Rabastan held up both hands and smiled innocently. Bella glared back at him.

    ‘Come on,’ said Evan, ‘let’s walk around a little. You coming, Reg?’

    ‘No, I think I’ll stay here for now,’ said Regulus.

    Evan shrugged and him, Rabastan, Avery and Wilkes went off.

    ‘Wankers,’ hissed Bella under her breath.

    Regulus smiled, faintly amused.

    Bella and Rodolphus began arguing and Regulus took his cue and subtlely left the couple and went through the crowds towards the back doors that led to the garden, which looked deserted considering it was the end of August and the autumn chill was not welcoming. Regulus, however, liked the cold.

    He opened the door and stepped outside, shutting it behind him.

    The cold chill was refreshing, it bit at his exposed skin and soothed him. He let out a sigh of relief. He was finally alone, with no one to bother him.

    He stepped down the porch steps and onto the garden path. The garden was framed by flowers of all colors and thick trees. Regulus walked through the expanse of foliage and sat down behind a tree, where no one would be able to see him. He pulled up his sleeve and caressed the area around his inner arm, where the Dark Mark was branded. It throbbed a little, sending pain pulsing through him. His cool fingers massaged the area around it, he was careful not to touch it. He pinched the bridge of his nose as an effort to numb his headache. He leaned against the trunk of the tree and was about to close his eyes when he saw a flash of white. He got to his feet quickly and walked towards the white.

    When he came closer, he could see it was a girl. She was standing on a rock, her back to him. She was very small, probably not even past five feet. Regulus noted her curves and realized that she was probably not a young girl. Her white heels lay discarded at her feet. She was trying in vain to grab onto the vines that hung to the stone walls that surrounded the garden. Regulus watched her try to grab the vines and pull herself up. She had no luck and kept on ripping the vines. Regulus was amused by her incessant attempts to get over the stone wall.

    ‘You know… I highly doubt you’ll be able to get over that,’ Regulus called out to the girl.

    The girl jumped, startled. She turned around and slipped off the rock and into the flowerbed. Regulus bit back his smirk and came forward to help her. She lay sprawled across the flower bed, he could see her white silk dress had grass stains all over the front. As he came closer, he saw that the girl had long, light brown hair that fell in waves well past her shoulders. It was messy and had leaves in it, some of it plastered to her face. Her childlike face was round, she had slightly golden skin, with a splash of freckles across the bridge of her small nose. She was biting her full bottom lip apprehensively and her cheeks were flushed with embarrassment. It was only when he locked eyes with her that he felt he couldn’t look away. Her wide eyes were a rare blue — like sapphires. She pushed herself up on her elbows, breathless, which only drew attention to her ample chest, Regulus looked away quickly and grabbed her small waist, pulling her up and out of the flower bed.

    She brushed herself off, looking at anything but him. Regulus continued to stare at her. Everything about her was small. She had a tiny, shapely figure. Her face was small, her hands were small, everything except her eyes. Her kaleidoscopic eyes. She continued to bite her lip apprehensively and Regulus could tell she was insecure. She wasn’t a classic beauty. She was a simple, subtle beauty. She was different than the girls Regulus normally liked and watched.

    ‘What were you trying to do?’ asked Regulus, breaking the silence and looking down at her.

    She looked up and fathomless icy gray met warm kaleidoscopic blue.

    ‘Nothing,’ she answered quietly.

    Regulus frowned at her and she looked away again and bent down to pick up her discarded shoes.

    She backed up a little, leaving more space between them. Neither of them said anything. Regulus was still frowning at her and she averted her eyes and played with the hem of her long dress.

    ‘Rosalie!’ a voice called out from the house, ‘Rosalie!’

    ‘Oh, no,’ she whispered, she stood up quickly, trying in vain to look presentable.

    ‘Rosalie!’ the voice of Ms. Tallis called out again.

    She lifted the hem of her dress and grabbed her heels by their straps and looked over her shoulder at Regulus. She bit her lip, her eyes searching his face, but said nothing. Their eyes locked again and Regulus couldn’t look away.


    She glanced at the house and then at Regulus desperately. She turned around and ran up the stone walkway and Regulus watched after her until her couldn’t see her anymore.

    Regulus followed soon after, walking leisurely through the garden, his footsteps could be heard at the end of the stone walkway. At the doors, Ms Tallis, her previous smile and kind face gone, was reprimanding Rosalie in a strict voice. Regulus was too far to hear what she was saying but he could see Rosalie’s big blue eyes brimming with tears. Ms Tallis’ cold glare and low hissing reminded Regulus of his mother when she used to reprimand Sirius. No matter how nice people looked on the outside, it was only to keep up appearances. But, behind closed doors was where the truth lay.

    Regulus’ footsteps approached and Ms Tallis turned, startled and Rosalie’s eyes widen. Ms Tallis eyed Regulus’ suave appearance and Rosalie’s stained dress and messy hair.

    ‘What were you two doing?’ asked Ms Tallis suspiciously, her gaze hardening on Regulus.

    ‘Nothing,’ replied Rosalie quickly, averting her mother’s piercing eyes and Regulus’ stare.

    Ms Tallis raised an eyebrow. ‘Very well. Rosalie, go upstairs and change into something else. We’ll talk after…’ she trailed off. Her gaze travelling from Rosalie, who picked up her skirts and disappeared inside, to Regulus, who had shoved his hands in his robe pockets.

    ‘White,’ Ms Tallis mused aloud, ‘do you know what white symbolizes, Mister Black?’

    Regulus had a faint idea as to what Ms Tallis was hinting at but feigned ignorance, ‘No, Ms Tallis.’

    ‘Purity,’ she said, turning her piercing eyes to Regulus, ‘White symbolizes virginity.’

    Regulus was silent, but stared back defiantly at Ms Tallis.

    Ms Tallis turned on her heel and walked back towards the doors that led back into the house. She disappeared behind them leaving Regulus alone.

    Regulus ran a hand through his dark curls and sighed. Above Regulus a room was illuminated and Regulus looked up to see Rosalie staring at him through her window. But when he looked back she was gone, and the light in her room was put out.

    Regulus looked up to see that the brightest burning star in the dark violet night sky was the Dog Star, the Sirius star. Regulus closed his eyes firmly and breathed in the cold night air.


Author's Note
I know I shouldn't be starting another story, but, I like writing this. I think Regulus is such an interesting character and I think he's really misunderstood. The title, La fille aux yeux saphir means "The girl with sapphire eyes." So... Comments? Thoughts? Corrections? Anything, I'd love to hear everyone's input. Thankyous all for taking the time to read!


gorgeous chapter image by Sundrops @ TDAs

Chapter 2: II.
  [Printer Friendly Version of This Chapter]

La fille aux yeux saphir by ClearCutDiamonds



            There was only silence. And then the soft light emanating from the candle was put out, enveloping the boy in darkness. The curling smoke rose from the candle and towards the ceiling in coils of faint gray. Regulus’ gray eyes were open in the darkness. Despite his exhaustion, he couldn’t sleep. If truth be told, he hadn’t actually slept well once in the past three months. He sighed heavily and shut his eyes. The burning pain in his inner forearm was what kept him awake all those nights, and it was a constant reminder of his ignorance.


            Outside in the hall, there was the faint sound of footsteps ascending to the landing that divided his bedroom and Sirius’ old one. His mother’s footsteps. This reoccurrence had been happening ever since Sirius had left, more often as time passed. Regulus ran a hand through his dark curls. Even when Sirius was gone, Regulus was still second-best. Even though Sirius had left – effectively soiling the family name and Regulus had stayed loyal to his parents, pledging allegiance to the Dark Lord – his mother still loved Sirius more. And it killed Regulus.


            A single tear escaped Regulus’ gray eye and slid down his cheek. He didn’t wipe it away nor did he stop the rest of the tears from falling.


            The door across the hall closed and the footsteps trailed across to Regulus’ door. He shut his eyes quickly, feigning sleep. The silver knob of the door turned ever-so-quietly and the door opened, flooding the dark room with light. His mother stood silently at the threshold for a few moments.


            When she spoke, her voice was only a whisper, but Regulus heard it clearly. ‘If only it had been you that had been the disappointment… not him.’


            The light disappeared as she closed the door again and Regulus tried to fight back the tears that were pooling in his gray eyes to no avail. In the darkness, he wept silently.






The aging house-elf drew back the emerald satin curtains that fell to the floor to reveal an overcast of gray skies and pouring rain. Regulus’ gray eyes snapped open. He rubbed his weary eyes, adjusting to the harsh light.


‘Good morning, Master Regulus. Mistress Walburga requests your presence in the drawing room. She expects that you have already packed for your return to Hogwarts,’ said the house-elf, meticulously folding Regulus’ new black robes.


‘Yes. Thank you, Kreacher,’ responded Regulus.


‘Master Regulus.’ Kreacher bowed low towards Regulus and disappeared out of the room, shutting the door with a resolute click.


Regulus sighed and covered his face with his hands. He stood up and walked to the adjoining bathroom. The mirror above the marble sink reflected Regulus’ tired face. The tears had dried but his eyes were still red-rimmed. He splashed his face with ice-cold water and it washed away the previous look of sadness from his eyes. Drying his face, he looked back at his reflection to see that his expression revealed nothing of his inside turmoil. His reflection showed only a mask.


He walked back into his room and opened his black leather trunk. His initials R.A.B were engraved in emerald. He reached for the new school books on his mahogany desk and placed them neatly in his trunk. Next, he placed the new robes Kreacher had just folded and left on his dresser in his trunk and looked around his room, checking to make sure that he hadn’t forgotten anything. Finally, he reached for his leather-bound journal and quill and packed them, as well. After shutting his trunk forcefully, he secured the clasps and placed it at his door.


Regulus dressed quickly in plain black robes and slipped his wand into his pocket. Looking around his room one final time, he grabbed the handle of his trunk and walked out, shutting the door firmly behind him.


He stopped in front of Sirius’ door. The feeling of sadness returned to Regulus. He felt the need to walk into Sirius’ room one last time. It was stupid, but somehow Regulus felt as if the room was the only connection he still had with Sirius. He couldn’t explain the feeling that came over him every time he thought of his older brother.


Leaving his trunk at the top of the landing, Regulus walked past the staircase dividing their rooms and turned the knob, pushing the door open slowly. He made sure not to make any noise that would attract his mother and stepped inside. Much of Sirius’ bedroom was still the same: the large bed with the gold and scarlet bedcover, the long velvet curtains, the chandelier, the pictures and posters that drove their mother mad. But, it was all different. The bed was made, the velvet curtains were drawn and everything in the room was finely coated with dust. The room was empty, forgotten, untouched. Left behind were only traces of his brother. He was gone forever and Regulus knew that.


Regulus woke with a start that night. He could hear noises coming from across the landing — from Sirius’ room. He glanced at the bedside clock; it was a quarter past midnight. Regulus knew his parents were sleeping and he had a faint idea as to why Sirius was up. He pushed his bedcovers aside and got out of bed. The sinking feeling in his chest and his anxiety made him move faster. He opened his door and moved across the landing to Sirius’ door. Leaning his ear against the wooden door, he tried to listen to what was going on. All he could hear were drawers being opened and closed. He was breathing quickly now. Without knocking, Regulus opened the door.


Sirius looked up, startled. He visibly relaxed upon seeing Regulus. He had no doubt been scared that he had been caught by his parents. Neither Regulus nor Sirius said anything. Sirius dropped a book into his trunk but still averted Regulus’ gaze.


‘So, this is it, then? You’re running away?’ asked Regulus, effectively breaking the silence.


‘What else do you want me to do, Reg?’ asked Sirius.


Regulus didn’t answer him right away. ‘We used to be so close, you know. I wish everything would go back to the way it was.’ Regulus had always been the naïve dreamer.


‘You know it can’t,’ said Sirius.


‘I know,’ replied Regulus.


Sirius looked up finally, meeting his brother’s eyes. ‘Come with me, Reg.’


‘I can’t,’ answered Regulus flatly.


‘Why not?’ asked Sirius. ‘Look, the Potters will be happy to have you, too. And Uncle Alphard left me some money…’


‘I highly doubt they’d want a Death Eater in their midst,’ said Regulus bitterly.


Sirius dropped the bottle of ink that he was holding. The glass bottle shattered and the black ink pooled on the floor. ‘Tell me you didn’t. Please.’


Regulus said nothing but rolled up his shirt sleeve to reveal his Dark Mark.


Sirius stared at it silently. ‘Fuck, how did this all get so messed up?’ he whispered, sitting down on the end of his bed, raking a hand through his dark curls.


Regulus pulled down his shirt sleeve. ‘I don’t know.’ He breathed in deeply in an attempt to stop the tears that were pooling in his eyes.


‘Why did you do it?’ asked Sirius softly.


Regulus cried now, it was all too real. ‘I don’t know. I don’t know! I was stupid and I believed them. Nothing I did was ever good enough. I wanted to be strong and I wanted mother and father to love me…’ He trailed off, weeping.


‘We can fight them together. Forget about all this. It’s just a mark. Dumbledore will protect you,’ pleaded Sirius.


‘I can’t run away, Sirius. He’ll kill me. I’m in way too deep now, Sirius. It’s too late.’


Sirius watched his weeping brother. It was like watching him drown and not being able to save him.


Regulus stopped weeping and looked up, tears tracks glistening on his cheeks from the light of the candle. ‘Did you hear that?’


Sirius stopped what he was doing as well and both boys listened. Someone below was stirring. ‘Fuck,’ hissed Sirius, dumping whatever was left on his bed into his trunk.


Regulus stood up and helped him as they heard footsteps mounting the stairs. ‘It’s mother,’ said Regulus. ‘Go before it’s too late.’ He pushed the rest of Sirius’ belongings roughly into Sirius’ hands.


Sirius pulled Regulus’ wrist. ‘Come with me. We can sort it out, Reg. I promise.’


‘No,’ said Regulus, forcefully shutting Sirius’ trunk closed. ‘I’ll be fine. Just go.’ Both boys knew Regulus was lying, he wasn’t going to be all right. ‘Leave.’


There was a curious expression on Sirius’ face that Regulus couldn’t comprehend. He looked like he wanted to say something but couldn’t. His gray eyes — eyes that mirrored Regulus’, were brimming with tears. There was nothing either could say that would fully grasp their feelings.


Sirius muttered a spell that caused his trunk to shrink and slipped it into his pocket. He pulled open the window where a Muggle motorbike was idling mid-air. He turned to Regulus and smiled sadly. His smile spoke the words that he could not find. He turned and slid onto the motorbike, driving out of sight.


The door of Sirius’ room burst open to reveal Walburga Black. She was dressed in a long satin gown, her hair fell loose at her shoulders and her face was wiped clean of any make-up, which only made her appear older. The long velvet curtains billowed softly from the air of the open window. Walburga looked around Sirius’ vacant room, tears in her hard blue eyes. Silently, she swept across the room to shut the window. Regulus didn’t need to say anything for she had already understood. He knew in that moment that she blamed him. He knew that she wanted him to have stopped Sirius.


‘Go to bed, Regulus.’ Her voice was only a harsh whisper and then she walked past him again and down the stairs.


Regulus didn’t move, though. He stood in Sirius’ empty room and stared at the starry night. When they were children, he and Sirius would star gaze, always childishly wishing that beyond the stars was something better than the world they lived in.


After awhile he walked towards the door, turning only once to look back upon his older brother’s room. He stared at the spot where, only moments ago, Sirius had stood — but would never stand again.




His mother’s call shook him from his reverie. He closed the door firmly and grabbed his trunk. Walking down the stairs quickly, Regulus could hear his mother and father speaking in soft tones in the drawing room. He placed his trunk in the foyer and walked towards the drawing room where his mother and father were awaiting his arrival for breakfast.


‘Good morning. Mother, Father,’ said Regulus, pulling up a chair.


Orion Black didn’t respond nor did he make any indication that he had heard his son as he continued to read The Daily Prophet.


‘Good morning,’ replied his mother.


Regulus was used to his parents’ stilted manner. Kreacher came into the room with a pot of tea and filled the cups just as Regulus reached for a piece of toast. The entire room was silent and Regulus sipped his tea quietly. He glanced around the room. Why his parents liked to have a room decorated with a family tapestry on every wall was beyond him. The constant reminder to be “Always Pure” was woven into everything the Blacks did. The older Regulus got, the more nauseated he was by his parents’ obsession with blood purity. His gaze travelled to the black hole in the tapestry next to his own name. No matter how hard he tried to avoid it, the black hole always seemed to be staring him straight in the eye.


‘Are you ready for your return to Hogwarts?’ asked his mother.


‘Yes, mother,’ replied Regulus.


Finally, Orion folded The Daily Prophet neatly and set it aside. His stare rested on Regulus. ‘You have made us very proud in your joining allegiance with the Dark Lord, Regulus. You show promise in proving yourself and the Black family loyal Purebloods. At least one Black son has showed that his loyalties lie with the right belief.’


‘Thank you, father,’ replied Regulus obediently.


Walburga Black excused herself and Kreacher returned with more food, but it only made Regulus feel sick. Orion pulled out his pocket watch, checked it and slipped it back inside his robes. ‘We should be leaving, your train will be departing soon.’


Regulus nodded and followed his father out of the drawing room and into the doorway. He grabbed his trunk and met his father and mother at the door.


‘We’ll meet you on the platform,’ said Walburga. His mother and father disapparated and Regulus followed suit.


            He apparated to King’s Cross Station and walked towards platforms nine and ten. As he came closer, he shut his eyes and broke into a run. The rushing air and sound of the train’s whistle met him as he opened his eyes. He looked around for his parents and saw them standing with the other Slytherin Purebloods.


            ‘Ah, Regulus,’ said his mother. ‘There you are.’ She glanced at him momentarily before turning back to Mrs Malfoy and continuing their previous conversation.


            All the Slytherin Pureblood families isolated themselves from the other families on the platform. Regulus looked around uninterestedly at the Slytherin families that were intermingling. Evan Rosier sidled up to Regulus along with Rabastan Lestrange.


            ‘How was your summer, Regulus?’ asked Rabastan, a smirk playing at his lips.


            ‘We saw each other last week, Rabastan,’ replied Regulus. ‘Everything’s been quite uneventful since then.’


            ‘Well, with the new school year starting up and plenty of new female opportunities…’ Rabastan trailed off, a dark gleam in his eyes. ‘Not to mention the fact that you’re the Dark Lord’s latest… servant.’   


            ‘You’ll want to keep your mouth shut, Lestrange,’ said Regulus, his tone icy.


            Evan Rosier’s eyes darted from Regulus to Rabastan. ‘Let’s change the subject, all right? Mulciber, Avery and Snape are waiting for us in the compartment. Let’s make this good-bye quick, shall we?’


            The boys separated and headed off to their respective families to say their good-byes. Regulus inwardly groaned as he spotted his mother talking to Ms Tallis. Her blue eyes found his and she gestured him to come forward. ‘Regulus, I was wondering when you were going to come say good-bye to your mother.’


            ‘You knew I wouldn’t have forgotten, mother,’ said Regulus, smiling tightly.


            His mother offered her cheek for Regulus to kiss, but did not kiss him back.


            ‘You must be so proud,’ said Ms Tallis, her eyes trailing on Regulus. ‘To have your only son so faithful to the Dark Lord.’


            Regulus caught the flash of hurt cross his mother’s face before she forced a smile. ‘Yes, Regulus has made us so proud.’ For someone hiding so many dark secrets, his mother’s front was anything but vulnerable.


            ‘Gabrielle,’ interrupted Mr Tallis. ‘The train is to be leaving any minute, it’s time to see the girls off.’


            ‘Of course, Charles,’ replied Ms Tallis, turning around.


            Aurelie and Adeline stood behind Mr Tallis in matching blue silk robes. Mr and Mrs Tallis kissed them both good-bye and they turned to leave, glancing at Regulus as they did.


            ‘Regulus,’ said Orion Black gruffly. ‘Make us proud.’


            Regulus nodded. Walburga Black stood at her husband’s side. ‘We’ll see you at Christmas and—’ She stopped short and her gaze locked on something on the platform. Regulus followed her gaze to see Sirius who stood amongst his friends, smiling. He must have sensed that he was being stared at for his eyes met Regulus’ across the crowds of people. For a moment, time seemed to stop. And then Sirius turned away and Regulus heard Avery calling his name.


            ‘ ’Bye mum, ’bye dad,’ said Regulus hastily, finishing his mother’s good-bye. He grabbed his suitcase by the handle and hurried towards the train as the final whistle sounded.


Regulus made his way up the steps and to the narrow hallway of the train. The train began to move out of the platform. Girls and boys leaned out of windows, waving to loved ones. Regulus knew he had no one to wave to.




            Regulus turned around to see Evan standing a few feet away. He walked towards Evan to the compartment where all the Slytherins were seated.




            ‘Late as usual,’ drawled Bellatrix from where she sat next to Rodolphus.


            ‘Got held up,’ replied Regulus monotonously, putting his trunk on the overhead shelf.


            ‘Never mind,’ said Lucius Malfoy impatiently. ‘You’ve met everyone?’


            Regulus looked around the compartment to see the twins, Aurelie and Adeline in attendance along with Avery, Mulciber, Snape, Evan, Narcissa and Rodolphus and Rabastan Lestrange. Regulus nodded and took the window seat at the corner of the compartment.


            ‘Now that we’re all here,’ said Lucius. ‘The Dark Lord wants all members to meet at the first full moon.’


            ‘That’s a month away,’ piped up Mulciber. ‘What does he want us to do?’


            ‘Make progress on recruiting faithful Purebloods,’ replied Lucius. ‘Obviously.’


            Regulus was staring out the window at the passing English countryside, ignoring Lucius’ pompous act and the talk surrounding the Dark Lord. The twin sitting next to Regulus shifted in her seat, leaning close to his ear. ‘I have to use the lavatory, could you show me where it is?’


            Regulus looked up to meet her pale blue eyes and seductive smile. Unlike her sister’s eyes, hers were nothing special. ‘Sure,’ he replied boredly, getting up.


            ‘We’ll be back,’ said Regulus to Lucius, not waiting for his approval to leave.


            Avery and Mulciber nudged each other and Evan smirked at Regulus as he walked out of the compartment. Regulus shut the compartment door after the girl came out. He could feel her eyes on him. ‘Bathroom’s this way,’ he said, not meeting her gaze. He led the way down the hall and stopped as they reached the first girl’s lavatory. Leaning against the wall, he waited for her to go inside, but that clearly wasn’t her intention.


            ‘Well, aren’t you coming in?’ Her voice was teasing.


            Regulus paused. She was just like all the others: pretty, foolish and easy. Her seductive smile and cheap tricks didn’t fool him, besides he didn’t even remember her name.


‘Yeah, sure,’ he said, flashing her one of his trademark smiles as she opened the door for him.








            Regulus didn’t know why he did it. Perhaps it was for affection. He knew it wasn’t for love because he’d never associated the two. Perhaps it was for dominance, however sick and twisted it was. He needed to be touched and in return feel something that would ease the pain.


            Regulus wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as followed the twin — Aurelie — who’s name he’d figured out, as she opened the door. She stopped short and Regulus nearly bumped into her. He looked past her to see Rosalie waiting at the door of the lavatory.


            Her blue eyes widened as she spotted Regulus behind her sister and she looked away quickly. Nearly a foot shorter than her sister, Rosalie seemed out of place in her pale rose silk robes, a red velvet ribbon gathering her long, dark hair back at the nape of her neck. She dropped the large leather-bound book she was carrying and picked it up quickly, flushing as she did.


            ‘Don’t be such a prude, Rosalie,’ said Aurelie coldly. ‘Run along.’


            Rosalie narrowed her eyes. ‘Right, we should just all be whores like you, Aurelie.’


            ‘I’d keep my mouth shut if I was you,’ said Aurelie angrily. ‘Do you remember what mother said? One more mistake and—’


            ‘Funny she didn’t include anything about doing things in lavatories with boys,’ said Rosalie calmly, glaring defiantly at her sister. She glanced at Regulus momentarily, eyeing him with the same disdain as she did her sister.


            ‘You’d better watch your mouth,’ replied Aurelie icily. ‘Come on, Regulus.


            Aurelie tossed her long blonde hair and began walking off. Regulus turned to look at Rosalie. She met his gaze with her intense blue eyes. ‘I think the boys lavatories are that way,’ she said, pointing left and pushing past him.


            Regulus opened his mouth to retort but found himself speechless.





Author's Note
The summary of the chapter was taken from The Killers' song, "When You Were Young."

Thank you all for reading!