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The Boyfriend List by Jellyman

Format: Short story
Chapters: 8
Word Count: 6,497

Rating: 12+
Warnings: No Warnings

Genres: Fluff, Humor, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew, OC
Pairings: James/Lily

First Published: 04/14/2007
Last Chapter: 06/16/2007
Last Updated: 03/27/2010

Thank you for the wonder banner by Vjosa!

Over 15,000 reads!

Lily Evans has always been a popular girl. She’s had her share of boyfriends, best friends, crushes and admirers. But now she has been put to the test. During a lovers quarrel, Lily is challenged by James to make a list of six relationships he has ruined for her. Now it is up to Lily to save her pride and create the one and only – The Boyfriend List.

Chapter 1: Prologue
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A/N: This was written in response to GinnyWeasleyPotter’s ‘The Boy Book or The Boyfriend List’ Challenge... I hope you like it :)

Disclaimer: I own... well, nothing, really... what a let down.

The Boyfriend List


December 3rd, 1977

The common room was muffled and peaceful as Lily Evans snuggled into James Potter’s shoulder, sleep threatening to engulf her. His fingers twirled her long red hair as she sighed softly. Her hands, which were splayed across his torso, fingered the soft cotton of his shirt, as she considered calling it a night and going to bed. This thought flew out the window as James leaned down as started kissing her neck. She giggled softly and nuzzled his neck, placing soft kisses on the exposed flesh.

Oh, yes, this is defiantly better.

She smiled into his shoulder as he kissed her nose.

‘You’re so beautiful,’ James murmured, his breath tickling her face. Lily smiled, her eyes twinkling, and she gave him a light kiss on his jaw and trailed kisses down his neck.

‘Seriously, Prongs,’ Sirius Black’s voice cut through their haze of tranquility, standing over them like a disapproving mother. He shook his head, his dark hair fall over his eyes. A near-by group of girls swooned. ‘I thought you had some amount of class. Shame on you. Shame on you both!’

‘Shut up Padfoot, leave them be,’ Remus Lupin, looking up from his game of chess with Peter Pettigrew. Remus’ silver eyes sparkled as he added. ‘Have fun children.’ Peter and Sirius laughed as James reddened, his arms flying as he attempted to swat Sirius while still holding Lily.

Lily glared at Remus as she sat up, stretching. ‘I think I am going to go to bed.’

James, Remus and Peter nodded and said ‘Goodnight’ but Sirius was too busy looking at Harriet Johnson who was bending over, trying to tempt her cat out from under the cabinet, giving everyone an eyeful.

‘Pwoar!’ Sirius breathed. ‘I wonder if she has a boyfriend.’

‘Kyle Pittwater, 7th Year, Beater on the Ravenclaw Quidditch Team,’ Lily said, with slight disgust.

‘I’m sure something could be arranged to fix that little hitch,’ Sirius said in a reasonable tone of voice, cocking his head, still staring up Johnson’s skirt.

Lily snorted in disgust. ‘Really, Sirius, don’t you think of anything else besides getting into innocent girls pants?’

‘Not really,’ he murmured, still eyeing up Harriet’s skirt.

‘Aww, Sirius, ignore Lily,’ James said, reeling Lily in with his arm. ‘She didn’t have much of a chance to play the field before she got me.’ He nuzzled her neck affectionately but she pushed him off, anger clear in her forest green eyes.

‘Yeah, because of you,’ she spat, raising her eyebrow.

‘Because of James?!’ Sirius laughed, tearing his eyes from Harriet, who had stood up. ‘Don’t flatter yourself!’

Lily growled menacingly. ‘It was! He ruined every relationship I had!’

‘Hey, hey,’ Peter said, frowning, ‘that’s a bit harsh - ’

‘He did! I can name at least six!’

‘Actually,’ Remus added, a thoughtful expression on his face, ‘I think she might be right you know...’

James cut in. His expression was stony as he said, ‘Prove it. I wanted names, dates and years. Six people who I have supposedly ruined your chances with.’

Lily stared at him at him for a beat, trying to find a hidden meaning behind his simple words. She couldn’t. ‘Fine,’ she said, spinning on her heel and stomped up the stairs.

‘Man, that girl has anger,’ Remus observed as a swish of bright red hair disappeared behind the door. Peter nodded in agreement and they both went back to their chess games, thoroughly unfazed by Lily's behavior.

James groaned, holding his face in his hands. ‘Good God. What have I done?’

Sirius patted him on the shoulder, his gaze focused on short blonde who was struggling to reach a book on the shelf, causing her skirt to ride up. ‘You know Prongs, I really don’t know.’ He frowned, pursing his lips. ‘Hey, do you think she has a boyfriend?’


Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. She was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans

A/N: I’ll try and post the next chapter in about a week! Please review =]

Chapter 2: Arthur Weasley
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A/N: Hello there. Well, this is the second chapter of The Boyfriend List I hope you like it :)

The Boyfriend List: Arthur Weasley

Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. Lily Evans was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans


1. Arthur Weasley

November 1st, 1971

His firey red hair glittered in the candle light; his eyes crinkled as his mouth spread wide in laughter; his voice carried over the table.

And the best (and the worst) thing about Arthur Weasley?

He was in his Seven Year. He was a matured man. So unlike the boys in my year.

I sighed, averting my gaze back to my food. I was only in my first year.

But he was so nice! Surely he wouldn’t mind a younger woman?

But then there was the case of his girlfriend... that Molly person... I saw them come into the common room the other night, laughing and snogging.

It was repulsive. I hated her.

I stirred my mashed potatoes around on my plate feeling depressed. There was not possibly anything worse than unrequited love.


Except, possibly, James Potter. Also know as the bane of my existence.

Seriously. People called him that. We had only been at Hogwarts for three months and already he had: three loyal friends; the admiration of girls (and boys...but in a different way) in our year; a crush on me, and; pulled five major pranks on me.

Lucky me.

I, on the other hand, had found no friends, did not have the admiration of neither boys nor girls, had a crush on a seventh year and had pulled no major pranks on nobody.

‘Lily,’ he said, breathing heavily. He obviously ran. But from where? ‘Would you be my girl - ’

‘No,’ I said in a bored tone.

His smile grew wider. ‘I knew you’d say that,’ he said.

Then he stared at me.

For a really long time.

Bored with the entire thing, I felt my gaze slip back to Arthur. I sighed wistfully, completely forgetting James was even beside me.

He was so perfect. Why was he with her? I mean, couldn’t he see we were meant to be together?

‘Uh, Lily?’ a voice cut through my train of thoughts. I jumped startled and was horrified to realize I had been drooling.


I glared at James, wiping my mouth. ‘Yes?’ I snapped impatiently.

‘Why were you staring at Weasley?’

I flushed bright red. ‘I wasn’t! Now, go away so I can finish my dinner!’

He frowned and cocked his head, as if trying to figure something out. ‘You were! You looking straight at him and - ’ he snorted ‘ - drooling! I saw you!’

‘I was not!’ I shrieked, causing people to stare. I shoved him off the seat, sending him sprawling across the floor. ‘Now GO AWAY!’ Now we had the full attention of everyone around us. Including Arthur Weasley and Molly The-Girlfriend. Not to mention many of my classmates.

Oh God. This can only end badly. Especially since it involved James Potter.

He stared at me from the floor; obviously the wheels spinning in his brain has finally clicked.

Oh no. I sent him a warning look but all I got back was a face of pure shock.

‘SWEET CIRCE!’ he yelled, loud enough to grab the attention of everyone in the Great Hall. Even the professors had stopped their conversation. ‘YOU, LILY EVANS, A FIRST YEAR, LIKE ARTHUR WEASLEY, A SEVENTH YEAR??’

Silence engulfed the hall as they digested the information James so kindly shared with them. Then laughter erupted from each of the tables as I felt anger and embarrassment well up inside me and a hot blush rush to my cheeks. I stole a glance at Arthur – he was beet red but was still laughing with Molly.

I couldn’t control myself as I picked up my pumpkin juice and poured it over James head, tears threatening to spill. He looked slightly ashamed sitting on floor, his eyes downcast.

Then I fled from the hall, running till I reached the Owlery, were I sat and cried till I had no more tears to shed.

I couldn’t believe he had done that.

A/N: Hope you liked it =] If you didn’t, tell me how I can make it better! It would help (but you can also tell me if you did like it =]). I’ll have the next chapter up in about a week.

P.S If you read/review my other stories, I'll love you forever =]

Chapter 3: Matthew Goldstein
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A/N: Here’s the next installment of The Boyfriend List. I hope (desperately) that you like it enough to review =]

The Boyfriend List: Matthew Goldstein

Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. Lily Evans was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans


2. Matthew Goldstein

October 17th, 1972

Clap, clap, clap! My sound of my shoes hitting the hard stone floor of the corridors ricocheted of the walls, sounding eerily empty. The potions corridor had always creeped me out, but it scared me even more so now it was empty. I was rummaging through my bag, searching for my lip balm, distracting myself from the creepy silence.

Suddenly, my foot hit a stone and fell, letting my arms fly out to break the fall causing my bag to fall to the floor, with books, papers, ink and quills to fall and scatter.


I sat up, staring at the mess. The inkpot had smashed and soaked through my parchment and books and my quills were a pile of soggy feathers strewn through the ink. I groaned, starting to gather my books.

Relief rushed through me as I heard the sound of footsteps behind me and a voice calling, ‘Lily Evans?’

I looked around, a goofy smile on my face as I recognized the voice. ‘Matthew?’

Matthew Goldstein. Class stud. Enough said. The only problem was that he probably knew it.

A smile brightened his beautiful face as he hurried up to me. ‘What happened?’ he asked, kneeling down to help me.

I blushed slightly and flicked my long red hair over my face the red of my hair would camouflage the red on my face. I mentally snorted. Not likely.

‘You know,’ I said in an unnaturally high and perky voice. ‘Me just being my usual clumsy self!’ I laughed nervously, stupidly and pathetically, all at the same time.

Gah. Idiot.

I mentally slapped myself. Get a grip!

‘So,’ he said, standing up, my books piled in his hands, ‘how have you been?’ He flashed that smile and I almost swooned when our hands brushed as he handed over my books.

‘G-Great,’ I stuttered, my knees threatening to give.

He stepped closer and I felt my heart speed up in my chest. ‘You know, Lily, you’ve been on my mind a lot lately.’ I mentally grimaced at the corny line, but thought nothing else of it as it was coming from him and not James Potter.

I swallowed hard, my heart about to jump out of my chest. ‘R-Really?’ I stuttered. ‘W-Why?’

He shook his head, laughing his musical laugh, his golden locks falling in front of his eyes. ‘Why?’ he asked, looking me in the eye. He coughed nervously as he looked at me. ‘You’re beautiful.’ Argh. Where does he come up with this stuff? a notably stupid voice in my head asked.

My face heated up and I am sure my face was redder than my hair. ‘Uh, thank you - ’

‘Do you think we could study together some time?’

I gave him a confused look. ‘Um, sure, but - ’

Then he was leaning in and I was sure I was dreaming as he pressed his lips against mine. The kiss was light and gentle but didn’t last long, as a loud bang suddenly echoed down the hall and we jumped apart.

My neck snapped to the source of the noise - the end of the hall - and was greeted with the sight of James Potter – who had dropped his books – staring at me in shock, Sirius Black struggling not to laugh, Peter Pettigrew grinning, amused at James’s expression and Remus Lupin walking down the hall, apparently unaware no one was walking with him.

Matthew cleared his throat, shifting his weight from one foot to another. ‘Oh, hey James - ’ Remus glanced at him, realizing what was happening, and raised an eyebrow disbelievingly. Rather how I was feeling at that moment.

James growled menacingly. ‘Get away from her.’ Sirius let out a snicker and stuffed his hand in his mouth as Peter stifled a laugh. I glared at them poisonously.

‘James, I’m not your - ’ I started but Matthew cut me off.

‘I was just helping her pick up her books!’

My eyes cut to him. ‘I beg your pardon?’

He looked at him, fright clear in his expression. ‘I’m sorry,’ he mouthed, not looking sorry at all. To James, he said, ‘As if I’d want to kiss her, I mean, she’s yours - ’

But he didn’t get to finish his sentence. Because I had hexed him.

He was such a prat. I sighed and began picking up my books as Goldstein hit the floor with a dull thud.

He may have been a prat, but he’d just stolen my first kiss. I gritted my teeth as I stalked away.


A/N: Please review! I hope to have the next chapter up in about a week =]

Chapter 4: Anthony Macmillan
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A/N: Blah, blah, blah. Hope you like it =]

The Boyfriend List: Anthony Macmillan

Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. Lily Evans was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans


3. Anthony Macmillan

September 31st, 1973

The Library was musty and dust fell and settled as I struggled to pull a rather heavy book on the properties and uses of moon rock off the shelf. I glanced back at my desk where my wand laid. I really couldn’t be bothered walking over to get it.

I was in the middle of a five thousand word essay on basically everything about moon rocks for Defence Against the Dark Arts and I had already used at least three books and I only had three thousand words.

And at the rate my progress with getting this book off the shelf was going, it was a good thing it wasn’t due for another three weeks.

‘Do you need help?’ a voice asked from behind me.

I turned, keeping a hand on the book to steady it. ‘Anthony! How are you? Oh, yeah, if you could, that would be great!’

Anthony Macmillan was a fourth year Ravenclaw and somehow, despite being in different houses and different years, we had developed a friendship. A girl in my dormitory, Linda Jumperable, said that she heard he liked me. I told Linda to go get her head checked.

‘Holy crap, Lily,’ he laughed, as the book loosened and came down, causing him to stagger, ‘Why is it so heavy?’

I rolled my eyes and led him to my table which was a little way away. ‘Because moon rocks are so very interesting.’

‘Ah, the moon rock essay,’ he said sympathetically, sitting next to me. ‘What are you up to?’

I opened the book to the index and scanned the page for the information I needed. ‘About three thousand.’

He raised an eyebrow, an odd look in his eye. ‘And when is it due?’

‘Um... the 21st,’ I said, flipping the book to the page I needed, being to take notes on a scrap piece of paper. He laughed loudly and I attempted to swat him, embarrassed. Suddenly he grabbed my wrist, not harshly, but gently. I frowned, my gaze sliding over from my essay to our hands, up his arm and met his eyes.


He closed his eyes and lowered his head, but kept hold of my hand. ‘Lily.’

I gently tugged my hand slightly, ignoring the tingling sensation that was running up my spine. ‘What are you doing?’

He breathed in out and deeply for a few seconds. Then he yanked my wrist forward and slammed his lips against mine. And then, as quickly as that happened, I felt a hand fist the back of my shirt, and pulled me back.

‘What on ear – oh, God, James, what on EARTH is your problem!?’ I yelled, jumping to my feet, banishing my wand under his neck.

‘Potter,’ Anthony spat, rising to his feet. ‘What do you want?’

James glared at him, backing away from my wand. ‘Don’t touch her.’

I leaned on the nearby bookshelf, my face in the hand that wasn’t holding the wand to James’s neck. ‘James, when will you learn? I am not yours!

James looked at me with a grin. ‘I know. But you wish you were.’

I growled. ‘Give me one good reason not to hex you.’

‘Because you love me - ?’ Suddenly Anthony lashed out, punching James in the jaw. I screamed as James fell on the floor and rounded on Anthony.

‘Why the hell did you do that? I snapped, rushing to James side. His nose was beginning to bleed and he looked dazed.

‘He was acting like you were his property!’ Anthony was beginning to look uncomfortable, nursing his hand, not meeting my gaze.

‘Yeah, no need to whack him! God, boys are so stupid!’ I sighed, exasperatedly. I looked around the Library for Sirius. Wherever James was, the Marauders were not far behind.

‘Look, Lily - ’ Anthony said, trying to grab my hand.

‘Just leave me alone,’ I said coldly, heading for Sirius (who was hiding behind a bookshelf), leaving Anthony standing in the middle of the Library.

A/N: Sorry for the delay =] If you review both new chapters, I'll love you forever and ever, not just forever.

Chapter 5: Sirius Black
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A/N: Ho hum. Welcome. Hope you like the chapter... it should be interesting =]

The Boyfriend List: Sirius Black

Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. Lily Evans was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans


4. Sirius Black

December 15th, 1974

This is so stupid, I thought to myself as I walked hand in hand with Sirius Black through the snowy streets of Hogsmeade.

‘Can you see him?’ Sirius hissed out of the corner of his mouth.

I shook my head bleakly and continued to wonder why on earth I was even doing this in the first place, not really looking for James Potter, who was, as per usual, the start, point and meaning of this whole thing.

You see, last week, I was approached Sirius Black with a proposition: the ultimate revenge on Potter.

When I questioned further, he refused to disclose anymore information on how exactly he was going to get the ‘ultimate revenge’, why he wanted the ‘ultimate revenge’ or what I had to do to get the ‘ultimate revenge’.

Tempted by the prospect of the ‘ultimate revenge’, I couldn’t refuse, and he finally gave me the details.

The previous week, Sirius had told James he intended to take Hufflepuff Jackie Lowenstein to Hogsmeade. After Sirius beat James particularly badly at wizards chess and then proceeded to flaunt it in James’s face for the next week, James had decided to find revenge – in this case, in the form of Jackie Lowenstein. When I asked Sirius why he was so worked up, he said it was like ‘taking an eye for an eye, or in this case and love for a love’.

‘And you love Jackie Lowenstein?’ I had asked skeptically.

He grinned wolfishly. ‘No. But she has great legs.’

He’s such a prat sometimes.

Suddenly I was pulled out of my reverie, when Sirius suddenly slammed his mouth into mine. I quickly put my arms around his neck (quite a feat, considering he was at least 5 inches taller than me) and closed my eyes in a dreamy fashion noting the only reason Sirius would kiss me ‘passionately’ would be because James Potter was in sight. I opened one eye and this idea was confirmed when I saw James Potter standing out the front of the Three Broomsticks, a giddy blonde – which I presumed was Jackie Lowenstein – hanging off his arm. His face turned into a vicious scowl as he saw us and he yanked Jackie off in the opposite direction.

I immediately broke off the kiss and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, staring down the path James had just gone down.

Sirius slowly followed my gaze and asked, ‘Do you think he saw? I couldn’t see because of your fat head.’

I turned and whacked him on the arm, faking a smile for benefit of keeping the appearance that we were going out, as I hissed, ‘My head isn’t fat!’

‘Sure it isn’t,’ he said, grinning. ‘Well? Did he see?’

I stretched my smile into a real one. ‘Oh, he saw.’

Sirius smiled evilly. ‘Excellent.’ He glanced down at me, offering one arm and gesturing in the general direction with the other. ‘Shall we?’

I nodded and took his arm, while he lead me down the same street James Potter had just graced with his presence.


‘And did you see his face?’ I laughed, trotting up the path to Hogwarts castle. ‘His eyes looked ready to pop out!’ Sirius let out a bark like laugh as he walked beside me.

We’d spent the rest of our afternoon following James and Jackie around Hogsmeade, flirting and snogging when they saw us and chatting and laughing when they weren’t looking. Sirius was actually a really fun conversationalist and I had had a great time over all.

As we neared the castle, the conversation slowed and turned into awkward silence as we stopped on the steps to the castle.

‘Well,’ Sirius said after a moment, a smirk forming on his lips, ‘It’s been fun.’

I raised an eyebrow, my heart thumping hard in my chest as a spoke, ‘But no fireworks?’

His smile grew wide as he shook his head, his dark falling in his eyes. ‘But no fireworks,’ he agreed.

I released the sigh I didn’t know I was holding, a smile growing on my face. ‘Thank God. I don’t think I would know how to reject you.’

He chuckled slightly and said, ‘You’re a right bitch, you know that?’ And then gave me a gentle kiss on the lip, backed off and ran up the steps into the castle.

I glanced around for James Potter but he was no where to be seen. I smiled lightly and walked back to the Great Lake, intending to mule over my thoughts.

Tee hee, this chapter was fun to write! I hope you like it =] I’ll have the next chapter up in a week!

Chapter 6: Amos Diggory
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A/N: There seems to be confusion about which of these should be classed as real chances. For those who are confused, don’t worry, all will be revealed =]

The Boyfriend List: Amos Diggory

Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. Lily Evans was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans


5. Amos Diggory

November 24th, 1975

I had officially just gone on the perfect date.

With whom, you may ask? Well, it might sound weird, but I had just gone out with the most popular boy in school. Amos Diggory.

But why would he ask you! you may ask.

Mind your own business, I might say.

But seriously. I was in shock.

It had gone unbelievably well. That was the shocking part. We’d even ran into James Potter!

Well, that part wasn’t as satisfying as I thought it would be. James barely glanced at us.

Actually, I don’t even think he recognized us.

Oh well. It was a good thing, anyway. It meant less pleading on my part.

But, oh, the day was wonderful! Amos took me to all the right places, did all the right things at all the right times and, despite the fact I was one year younger than him, I just couldn’t get over the fact he even asked me!

I sighed as I flopped onto my dormitory room bed, a stupid smile on my face.

Ahh... Everything was so splendid! I didn’t even think James had a crush on me anymore (if he saw us even)!

But, funnily enough, as that thought dawned on me, I felt an odd tug on my heartstrings. It was completely baffling, as I had waited for this day for practically my whole time spent at Hogwarts.

I think I’ll put it down as simply the regret of another chapter in my life passing.

I felt like I was floating on dream as I quickly stepped into the shower, feeling the scalding water warm up my freezing body. Despite only being Autumn, the weather had been awfully cold.

_Luckily, I now had Amos to warm me up, I giggled as the stupid, cheesy thought slipped through my head.

God, one date and I am practically in love with the guy. Puh-thetic.

I quickly slipped on a pair of jeans, a jumper and a pair of flats. I ran a brush through my hair and ran down the dormitory stairs, happiness fueling my steps as I ran to the Great Hall for dinner.

Despite being late, and the Great Hall being loud, the chatter almost completely died as I stepped into the Great Hall. I not-so-subtly craned my neck to see if Amos was sitting where he was supposed to sit, at the Hufflepuff table.

Only he wasn’t there.

I should have realized something was wrong at about this point.

Trying not to look disappointed, I walked up to the Gryffindor table, the chatter returning to normal, if not louder.

I lowered myself into a seat next to my closest friend, Melanie Puttler.

She looked up nervously as I sat. ‘Oh, Lily, I am so sorry,’ she whispered, throwing herself on me.

I frowned and pried myself from her arms. ‘About what?’ I asked suspiciously. I immediately looked up and down the table for James Potter, but he was no where to be found either.

Amos and Potter. Not here.

What an odd coincidence.

Mel frowned up at me. ‘You don’t know?’ she said.

‘Know what?’

Her eyes widened and she looked back at her plate. ‘Haha,’ she forced. ‘I got you, Lily. Nothing happened.’

My frowned deeper as I thought, lifting my plate to spoon some rice.

Amos and Potter.

The thought just wouldn’t leave me, when I need to know what on Earth Melanie was talking about.

Amos and Potter.

Amos and Potter.

Amos and Potter.

Then it clicked.

The gentle tinkle of expensive china was the last thing that was heard before I exploded.

A/N: And I think you know what happens next... and what happened =] Review?

Chapter 7: James Potter
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A/N: Well. I hope you like it!

The Boyfriend List: James Potter

Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. Lily Evans was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans


6. James Potter

November 9th, 1976

I stared at James Potter from across the table, feeling my heart break in two as he flirted with Cindy Lowington. He hand was on the small of her back, his face stretched into a wide smile as he laughed at something she had said. His voice carried across the table and like flowed over me like honey. His jet black hair glistened in the candlelight as he gently stroked Cindy’s ratty blonde mess she so rudely called hair.

I lowered my gaze to my plate of potato and sausages, feeling my appetite disappear.

When, you may ask, did Lily Evans start to get jealous of James Potter’s play things?

And I may answer, that’s what I ask myself every morning I get up.

You see, I cannot pin-point the day I started to like James Potter. Merlin, sometimes I think I have liked him ever since I the first time I saw him, on the Hogwarts express.

Only, of course, it didn’t show itself in full view till a few weeks ago when I found him snogging some girl in a broom closet in the Charms corridor. Being Head Girl, I, of course, gave them both detentions (despite James being Head Boy... I know) and screamed a whole lot, which made me feel a little better, but when I went to bed that night, the reality of the whole thing came crashing down on me.

James Potter did not love me, as he so often professed. If he loved me, he wouldn’t go around kissing blondes in broomclosets.

And yet I still liked him. No matter how much he flirted and snogged other girls, it didn’t stop me from falling for him.

It was quite pathetic really. Now, I couldn’t even think about accepting any invitation of James’s in fear of getting my heart broken. It was a weak and pathetic strategy, but it was one that I stuck by, as I couldn’t bear to think what people would say if James Potter broke my heart instead of the other way round.

I glanced over at him and quickly straightened as I realized he was not on his seat and that Cindy had slithered back to her seat at the Ravenclaw table. Then someone slid into the seat next to me.

I sighed. I didn’t need to see who it was. I already knew.

‘Hey,’ James Potter’s voice swept through my like a river, almost making me swoon. But defiantly making me light headed.

‘The answer is no James,’ I said, softly, shoving some mashed potato in my mouth, forcing myself to look at him.

He grinned, glancing at my lips which, I was sure, were covered in potato. Just for the hell of it, I slowly dragged my tongue over my lips, lifting both the potato and James’s eyebrows.

‘I didn’t even ask anything,’ he said, in a distracted tone of voice.

I smiled smugly and cut up some sausage, shoving it into my mouth as I went. ‘I know. But even a monkey could tell what you were going to ask, James.’

He pouted and leaned back, watching me eat. ‘Lily, go out with me.’

I raised an eyebrow. ‘Was that even a request?’ I asked in a mocking tone.

He smirked. ‘No.’

I snorted disbelievingly. ‘You’re ego is much too large for the room, Mr. Potter,’ I said, taking a bread roll from the basket and biting into it, while looking at him innocently.

As long as I kept food in my mouth, the less I would be inclined to accept.

Everyone with eyes could see you flirting with that silly blonde, you oblivious twat, I added to myself.

‘Lily, please,’ he practically begged, taking my free hand.

I frowned disbelievingly, snatching my hand away, scooting away from him. ‘No! You don’t just go around ordering people to go out with you, Potter!’

He put his other hand over mine and said, in a reasonable tone of voice, ‘I wasn’t seriously ordering you and you know it. Please, Lily, go out with me!’

‘And yet you still do it again!’ My body language was getting erratic and I was getting frantic. The longer I hung around him, the weaker my resolve not to go out with him got. We were also beginning to attract attention from those around us, which didn’t help, as I was beginning to feel as though their eyes were practically burning holes in my skin. ‘Leave me alone James!’

He frowned, looking at me, concerned. ‘Lily,’ he asked cautiously, putting his hand over mine, ‘are you al - ?’

I slapped his hand away from me, tears springing to my eyes. ‘I said, LEAVE ME ALONE!’

And with that ringing through the Great Hall, I jumped out of my seat and fled to the Owlery and sat down and cried.

A/N: This chapter feels odd to me... if you spot something I can make better, please tell me! I’ll have the final chapter *tear* up on Saturday, probs =]

Chapter 8: Epilogue
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The Boyfriend List: Epilogue

Lily Evans was mad. Lily Evans was really mad. Lily Evans was really, really mad.

She needed to prove something.

She quickly had a shower and got dressed in her pajamas. She grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down at her desk. She unscrewed her inkpot and took out a quill. She dipped it slowly into the ink and paused over the paper. Slowly she lowered her quill to the paper. Slowly she formed the words:

The Boyfriend List
By Lily Evans

1. Arthur Weasley
2. Matthew Goldstein
3. Anthony Macmillan
4. Sirius Black
5. Amos Diggory
6. James Potter

December 4th, 1977

After three grueling hours of thinking of previous boyfriends, Lily Evans had finally done it. She knew there were probably more relationships James had ruined but she didn’t want to think about it anymore. No, really.

The experience made her realize all boys at this school were cowardly prats. Both including and excluding James Potter.

She glanced at the clock on her beside table and groaned as she saw the time. Two o’clock.

She quickly slipped into bed and fell into a deep sleep of chocolates, roses, hearts and boys.

‘I’m done!’ Lily pronounced proudly the next morning during breakfast. She slapped down her small list of names in front of James who was sitting with the rest of the Marauders.

Sirius quickly leaned over James and grabbed the list before James could even look at it.

‘What am I doing on this list?’ he asked, frowning. They all looked up at her, eyebrows raised.

Lily lowered herself into her seat and helped herself to some bacon. ‘Well,’ she started, ‘if you hadn’t of been James’s best friend, something could have been.’ She smiled lightly. ‘You’re quite a good kisser you know.’

Sirius preened. James glowered.

‘I remember that day,’ he said darkly. ‘I was so mad at you two.’

‘I believe, James, that was the point,’ Remus smiled.

‘Give me that list,’ James muttered, snatching the list out of Sirius’s hands. Sirius laughed lightly at his friend’s obvious annoyance, and downed some bacon.

‘Me?! Why am I on this list?’ he said, frowning in confusion.

‘Well, if you must know,’ Lily began stiffly, concentrating hard on grabbing some egg, ‘I’ve liked you since last year. But last year, need I remind you, you were still a prat.’ She ended, as if this was reason enough.

James regarded her curiously. ‘That explains so much.’

After a slight pause, he looked back at her list.

‘Arthur Weasley?’ he spat incredulously, ‘How did I ruin that chance? There wasn’t even a chance there!’

Lily pouted and pinched him. ‘Well, there might have been had not someone completely blew it!,’ she hissed.

‘And,’ he continued, ignoring her, ‘Amos Diggory deserved that beating. He is a prat.’

‘Well, he wasn’t to me!’

James ignored her again. ‘And Goldstein and Macmillan are also prats.’’

‘I think,’ Peter piped in, speaking loudly over Lily's disagreeing remarks, a humorous twinkle in his eyes, ‘you should declare this list invalid, James.’

James smiled mischievously at Lily, who had shut up, her mouth forming a perfect O, as she struggled for words. ‘I think winning should have an incentive - ’

Lily found her voice. ‘You most certainly did not win! And that was not part of the deal!’

‘- and I think Lily should face her fears. This afternoon, you and me, two brooms, the Quidditch pitch.’

Lily eyes widened and she stayed silent for the rest of the meal.


Just as they were leaving, James and Lily straggeling behind, James pulled her into a dark corner.

He grinned happily at her shocked expression. ‘You know, I could make those flying lessons worth your while,’ he said softly, kissing her.

She matched his grin and kissed him back. ‘I’ll bet you could.’

The End
A/N: OMG. The first story I have ever finished! Hope you enjoyed it and thanks for reading! :) Review?