You are viewing a story from

Valour by blackballet

Format: Novel
Chapters: 45
Word Count: 100,067

Rating: Mature
Warnings: Contains profanity, Strong violence, Scenes of a sexual nature, Substance abuse, Sensitive topic/issue/theme

Genres: Drama, Horror/Dark, Romance
Characters: Dumbledore, McGonagall, Lupin, James, Lily, Sirius, Pettigrew, Voldemort, OC
Pairings: James/Lily, Remus/OC, Sirius/OC, Other Pairing

First Published: 08/07/2013
Last Chapter: 06/05/2016
Last Updated: 01/12/2017

banner by me 

Life goes on

But so does death


          Innocence and arrogance combine in a story about eight newly-graduated revolutionaries. 

Chapter 42: The New in the Old

 (June 15th, 1981)


“Just look at it, James,” Lily cooed, crouching to face the small, white-furred cat that was sniffing her fingertips.

“Let’s go home, Lil,” he said in exhaustion, hiking Harry further up his hip. The two were on their way home from the funeral.

“James I just have to have this cat!” she exclaimed. James looked down at Lily, and smiled gently. He hadn’t seen her smile like that in a long while.

“And just what is so special about this cat in particular?” he asked, egging her on. “We have plenty in the garden to choose from.”

“This one reminds me of Dorcas,” she said quietly, stroking its ears. It stuck its nose in the air, and Lily continued petting down its back as James’ face froze.

“Alright, Lil. But I’m not going to remember to feed it, I’m telling you right now,” he said, scoffing lightly as Lily picked up her new cat. They continued down the road to their house.


Marlene sat atop the freshly packed dirt. She picked at her ugly trainers that she used for Quidditch training in seventh year when she rebelled against her mother and did that sort of thing. She sighed, letting her hand float over the pills of soil. Dorcas was down there. Her body was down there, so Marlene would never see her again.

“Here,” Sirius said, handing her a bottle of vodka. The two had missed the funeral, and thankfully so. Marlene tipped her head back and took a large gulp of the vodka. She felt so guilty over Dorcas’ death, she didn’t mind the bitter sting.

Sirius leaned again the side of her headstone. It read: Dorcas Meadowes March 30th, 1960-June 12th, 1981 friend to all

That made Sirius scoff. She was so much more than someone else’s friend. She was a mother. Sure, she lost her baby, but she was a mother. And she was a daughter. So she killed her father. So her father killed her mother. She was a sister. So her father killed her sister. So what? She was alive. Now she was dead. Was, is, it’s the same thing. And if it wasn’t, Sirius wasn’t either.

“Do you think she knew? Like, she knew as soon as it was happening that she would die?” Marlene asked Sirius sloppily and slowly. Sirius smirked slightly.

“She called me. She must’ve known, otherwise she would’ve just kicked their arses.”

Marlene nodded in agreement, and leaned back on the cold stone behind her.

“Oi, you two!” a police officer said from across the graveyard. Marlene raised her eyebrows at Sirius and held out a hand for him to help her up. “What do you think you’re doing?” he yelled. Marlene smiled slightly. A portly man like that looked so silly running over to the two wizards.

Sirius stood up and hoisted Marlene up along with him.

“Where should we go?” he asked groggily, as the policeman grew closer. Marlene shrugged.

“Your place?” she asked. He nodded, and as the policeman finally approached them, huffing and red in the face, the two spun away simultaneously.


Peter sat as still as he could, gluing his back to the chair as much as possible. He never had very good posture, so this was a real challenge for him. The atmosphere was also very strong, and it was slightly suffocating to Peter, but he knew he couldn’t ask to be excused.

Voldemort’s dark eyes pierced Peter even when they weren’t looking at each other. That’s how Peter knew he was searching around in his brain.

“So, Peter. Mary has betrayed us,” he said, calculating behind his mask.

“It seems so, master,” he tried, sounding weak.

“Thank you for attempting to stop her. You are right. We will find her.” Voldemort cut into his steak with his wand and watched Peter for his reaction.

“I was only doing my duty, My Lord,” he responded. Peter also glanced up from his dish, waiting for a reaction.

“What I found strange,” Voldemort said, floating a piece of meat into his mouth, “is that the Order of the Phoenix was even informed that Dorcas Meadowes was taken,” he said stonily, chewing in his cheek.

“She called Sirius Black. On a muggle telephone,” Peter rambled, making Voldemort slam his fists down on the table on either side of his plate. The silverware and china that lined the table shook with the force, and Peter jumped in his chair slightly.

“Another muggle contraption that will be the death of me,” he grumbled. “Did you not think to disconnect her communication device? I assume you filthy half-bloods know how to use muggle paraphernalia just the same,” he said nonchalantly, going back to cutting up his dinner. Peter swallowed and continued.

“No I did not, master. I apologize…”

“Oh do you apologize Peter?” he asked darkly, not looking up from his plate this time. “Elf!” he yelled out, calling for a house elf to tend to him. A small, trembling house elf appeared next to him, his large head bowed gracefully. “Make another, this is overcooked,” he said, not looking down and dropping the dish ungracefully to his left. He stood suddenly, and Peter attempted to stand as well, but was unable to move.

“Did you not think?” he asked, moving towards Peter slowly and dragging his wand across the unused table settings. “Or were you perhaps hoping to be caught?”

“No, never Lord,” he pleaded uselessly.

“DO NOT LIE TO ME, PETER!” he bellowed suddenly, making Peter feel as if he’d been blown back into the chair. “You will suffer for your shortcomings. And Mary’s, considering she was here under your recommendation.”

“My Lord, I beg of you.”

“Yes, you do, Peter,” he said, raising his wand to Peter’s chest. “Crucio.”


(June 16th, 1981)


“I mean, if we’re being honest here, she was a bit of a bitch,” he said, snorting and taking another sip of the Vodka bottle from the day before.

“She was!” Marlene agreed emphatically, hanging off of Sirius’ shoulder as they laid together in Sirius’ guestroom again. “Did I ever tell you,” she said slowly, her lips sticking together, “that one time she borrowed my lipstick and then never gave it back? I mean who does that! And now, who knows if I’ll ever get it back,” Marlene sighed dramatically, tears coming to her eyes again.

“You never told me that!” Sirius said, gasping and stroking Marlene’s hair as if her loss of lipstick was the worst thing that could ever happen. “I’m sorry Marlene.”

“It’s okay, Sirius,” Marlene said, closing her eyes as she began crying again. “I’m just going to miss that lipstick so fucking much.”

Sirius looked down on Marlene, watching her cry through her closed lids, and sighed. “Marlene, I love you. And I want to have sex with you,” he said plainly. Marlene opened her eyes slowly as if someone had painted them shut.

“Oh, shut it you prick. You love Dorcas.”

Sirius frowned and pursed his lips as Marlene closed her eyes again. He poked Marlene in the side a few times until she opened her eyes again.

“But Dorcas got killed,” he moaned. Marlene shook her head and closed her eyes again. “I’m never going to find anyone better than her and she got killed,” he muttered suddenly, his mood flipping back to two days ago.

“I loved her, too. And now I’m stuck with you,” Marlene spat bitterly, glaring up at Sirius. “How do you think I feel?”

“I was never supposed to be with her, McKinnon! You’re the reason we even got together in the first place!”

Marlene frowned deeply, pursing her lips at Sirius.

“Oh, don’t act like you didn’t fucking know,” he muttered, tossing his hair out of his eyes.

“Sirius, what’re you...”

“So you mean to tell me that not one person in your family ever told you that we were arranged to be married in fifth year?” He whispered violently, shaking visibly. “That’s why Dorcas and I got together. Not some petty shit about Mary.”

He took a great, stabling breath. “I couldn’t fall in love with the person my parents wanted me to. I’d be a pretty lame rebel.”

Marlene tilted her chin down as she sat up from Sirius’ shoulder. He tilted his chin down to look at her, but she avoided his gaze.

“Anyway.” Sirius took the bottle from Marlene and tossed it over the side of the bed. “Seems to have worked out for them just like it always does.”

Marlene suddenly threw her head down over the side of the bed and threw up the contents of her stomach.