You are viewing a story from

Mirroring Happiness by emerald_moons

Format: Novella
Chapters: 3
Word Count: 6,476
Status: Abandoned

Rating: 15+
Warnings: Strong Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature

Genres: Drama, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew, OC, OtherCanon
Pairings: James/Lily, James/OC, OC/OC, Other Pairing

First Published: 06/13/2008
Last Chapter: 10/01/2009
Last Updated: 10/01/2009

Banner by Em_ @ TDA  l  Rewritten l  beta'd by kaityb

They say you never really miss what you had until its gone. Not that you could ever say I 'had' James Potter. Who knew the he would eventually tire of his little escapade, consequently turning the entire school against me.

At the start of the year I had thought that would be my only problem. I hadn't suspected how that was just the beginning of an inevitable fall. In more ways than one.

Chapter 1: Shut Away

Chapter One
Shut Away

You may know me as Lily Evans, the girl James Potter used to chase, but doesn't anymore for reasons that no one truly knows. You may also know me as that one girl that went lunatic on James Potter, and that you should avoid her and her friends at all costs, if you like being liked, that is. You may, finally, not know me at all, other than by the cruel things the students of Hogwarts called me.

Skank. Slut. Whore.

Those were the nicknames that I was labeled with by the end of my sixth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It all occurred because of the general assumption of what I said and did to James Potter, otherwise one of the most popular of boys at Hogwarts.

That assumption is a lie.

I'm not going to tell you what happened that night either. You will figure that out soon enough. All you can know is that of all the guesses Hogwarts has for James Potter's sudden detestation, almost all - if not all - of those guesses are wrong.

~ * ~

"Lily Marie, I am not going to repeat myself again. Get down here." my mother's voice rang out for the fourth time in a minute after I had not replied to her other calls to supper.

I snapped my book shut with a sigh knowing I could not ignore her any longer.

“Coming!” I yelled down to her, as I didn’t plan on finding out what she had planned for me if I did not come. My parents may not be wizards, but that fact came in to no consultation when I was faced with their fury. Generally they were very pleasant people, but only a fool would test their limits too much. My father especially was a force to be reckoned with.

Putting the book under my arm, I stepped down on the ladder to the main floor of the house from my loft bedroom. Quickly I made down it, moving with ease after living up there since the summer before my second year at Hogwarts. It made living with my sister much more pleasant when I didn't have to see her glaring at my magic books strewn across our bedroom.

My eyes slid over the rooms before me. Petunia, my petulant and only sister, sat on the couch in the living room staring at the wall absentmindedly, not caring that the food was ready. She always insisted on eating in that room when I had friends over.

Speaking of friends, I wondered where my best friend and her boyfriend were. They were to arrive through the Floo Network at one. Glancing at the clock on the wall, I noted that it was three minutes after one. They were, as usual, running late, if only slightly.

You hope, said an annoying little voice in my head. It sounded suspiciously like Petunia when she was in a right foul mood (an example was right now), and was beginning to sneak its little voice into everything lately, especially with the rising tension in the wizarding world and the constant whispers of war.

I shook my head, trying to shake off the worry that arose whenever my friends did not arrive exactly on time. It was stupid, I knew, to worry about silly things like that when I had only just owled my friends yesterday.

A startled shriek yanked me from my thoughts, and I found that my worries were, as always, foolish, and Petunia was clinging to her seat on the couch like it was the only thing keeping her to the ground.

“Lily!” Before I could attempt to reassure my sister that she was not, in fact, going to levitate off of the couch, I was attacked my best friend, Alice. I stood still in her embrace for a second, before leaning into her hug.

“Hey Alice.” Seeing Alice was both a joyous and depressing experience. Alice was not returning this year to Hogwarts with me and soon would be off to do Auror training. My other friend and Alice’s boyfriend, Frank, had been out of Hogwarts two years, so I knew what it was like to be missing him. But Alice had been my constant support since third year. It was going to be hard to go back without her. I had to force myself to let her go.

Frank pulled me hug also, and I thought numbly on how much like an adult he looked. I had acknowledged that he was nineteen in my head, but had never seen it so plainly before me.

“Long time no see, Lily, much too long.” Frank smiled kindly, and Alice nodded. Petunia sniffed disdainfully from her seat, but my friends were too used to her to pay her any mind. Frank moved past me to greet my parents and I could feel my father beaming from where he stood. He adored them both.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” Alice murmured accusingly in my ear before continuing on past to say hello also.

I gave her a tiny smile, resigning myself to her determined look. She may look like a fragile, gentle young woman, but she was fierce when she wanted to be. There was little use arguing with her.

“Come on Lils, time to eat.” I pulled up and chair, feeling ravenous.

I stared down at the food before me, feeling a grin creep up my face. Spaghetti. Frank’s favourite. I really did wonder if my friends noticed how much my parents were in love with them. I settled into the seat next to Alice and opposite of my father.

Petunia walked into view, on her way to the bedroom used to share with her.

“Petunia, dear, are you going to eat anything?” my mother asked tiredly.

Frank stuffed his face with food quickly, his eyes transfixed on his meal, whilst Alice looked on with disinterest.

“No mother, I’m not hungry now. I’ll eat later.” Even though she had not said it, we could hear ‘after they are gone’ being strongly implied in her words.

My mother nodded curtly, watching sadly as her older daughter sulked away. I gazed morosely at the floor.

“How I wish she wasn’t so stubborn,” She breathed out, starting to eat. “Excuse her. She and her boyfriend, Vernon, are fighting. I’m sure she doesn’t mean to lash out.”

It was a lie, an often-heard lie at that, but no one commented. Petunia was a touchy subject and it would never be a smart idea to prod at the thinly hidden truths of Petunia’s sourness.

“So, I hear you all are going out to Diagon Alley this afternoon to help Lily fetch her supplies and such?” my father asked. I silently thanked him for the change of subject.

“Yes,” Frank responded, his eyes alight. “I have not been there in so long. I wonder if it has changed. I hope not, it was always nice to have that consistently. It would wouldn’t be right if it were any different!”

Alice giggled softly, “Sure, dear, whatever you say. You just want to make sure you can have Florean’s Ice Cream, right?” Frank blushed a deep red, and I joined in.

“Oh no, he wants to see Madam Malkin. You know about that enormous infatuation he has always had with her?”

Alice gave in indignant squeak, “He better not be making eyes with some tart, or she may not survive the day.” She put on a cool smirk, “And now, darling, you wouldn’t want me to go to Azkaban because of a silly thing like that, isn’t that right?”

Frank watched his girlfriend nervously, “Of course not, Alice. No flirting for me!” he laughed tightly, eyeing her uneasily.

Alice grinned broadly, “No that’s my little whipped boyfriend. Good boyfriend.” She patted him on the like she would a dog. We laughed at the truth of it all.

“I sincerely pity you, Frank,” my father laughed mischievously. “These women - what are they doing to us?”

Frank shook his head, clicking his tongue against his teeth mournfully.

“Dad, don’t think I don’t know what you are doing,” I accused as I turned to look Frank square in the eye. “Come on, we need to save you” I stood, my chair squeaking against the floor as I did so. Alice followed in quick succession and we moved to either side of Frank.

“Now Frank, are we going to do this the easy way, or the hard way? I really would prefer if you came peacefully, but-”

He put up his hands in surrender, “I’m coming, I’m coming. No need to do stuff to me.” He forcefully said as he stood also and we flanked him like bodyguards. As we marched him across the room, he turned around and mouthed ‘save me’ at my father.

Once we had him safely away from those who could possibly turn him against us fine women, we burst into hysterical giggles.

“Oh, your face!” Alice said, kissing Frank lightly. He refused to kiss back, crossing his arms in annoyance.

“Don’t be like that, Frank. You know we had to save you from evil words my father was saying against us women,” I laughed lightly, settling down on my bed. Alice and Frank took the two chairs in the room.

“Uhuh,” Frank muttered back, clearly unconvinced. “So, when are we leaving for the alley? I admit it; I want that ice cream.”

Alice turned serious, “After I have a chat with Lily.”

I was about to protest, to tell her that this was unnecessary and did we really have to have this conversation here, but her pursed lips told me that she was not taking no for an answer.

Frank rose from his chair, “Okay, girlies. Girl chat on, boy out.” I smiled as he went back down the ladder again.

Alice leaned back in her chair, watching me skeptically and I resisted the urge to flee. I knew what this was about. I relaxed back into my pillows, glad for once that I had demanded walls around my loft space. It was moments when Alice wants to have ‘talks’ that I am glad I am closed away from everyone else.

“All right Lily. I’m going to talk and you are not, got it?” Alice said, and I gave her a small nod. “You are avoiding me and Frank. Last year you wanted us over all the time, now you only had us over because this is what we planned mid-way through sixth year. I don’t need you to tell me why because I know that answer myself. Hell, I saw that answer. Ever since whatever the hell happened with Potter and you - that you won’t talk to me about for some stupid reason - you have barely talked with us. Digging your head in your books and trying to pretend no one exists.

“I saw the relief in your parents’ eyes when you were joking with us, Lils. You won’t talk about it and aren’t dealing with it.” Alice looked a bit helpless. A twig of guilt made me begin to open my mouth, to tell, but I shut it almost as soon as it opened. No. The guilt didn’t matter.

“Look, would you just talk to me? I don’t like leaving you at Hogwarts, alone, in less than a month, as is. If I knew what was so wrong…” Alice was offering to listen. But I couldn’t tell her.

I rose, avoiding her eye. “I think it would be a good time to go to Diagon Alley, don’t you think?” I started for the ladder.

“Lily… just answer this, okay?” Alice muttered quietly, and I paused. I would listen at least.

“Do you-” She broke off, looking for words. “Lily, James asked you this question since third year: ‘will you go out with me?’ You always said no. No thought, no hesitation, just no.” Alice hesitated herself; nervous I would run. “Would you say yes now? I don’t know what happened with you two but would you? If he asked you, what would you answer?”

I froze. That was not what I expected, of all the things she wanted to know. I thought for a moment, watching Alice approach me. What was my answer?


The word had pressed itself through my teeth without my consent. But, I realised it was true. My answer was yes.

A/N: So, what do you think? This is a rewritten version of this story that had three chapters, but was not working very well for me so I changed the storyline a bit. If you have read the other version, do you think this is better? Is Lily's characterization correct? Do you like her?

Thanks for reading!