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It Can't Be That Bad by PenguinsWillReignSupreme

Format: One-shot
Chapters: 1
Word Count: 2,066

Rating: 12+
Warnings: No Warnings

Genres: General, Humor
Characters: Scorpius, Albus, Rose

First Published: 12/08/2008
Last Chapter: 12/18/2008
Last Updated: 12/18/2008

Amazing banner by BitterSweetFlames @ TDA

Scorpius, Rose and Albus are at The Burrow when their NEWT results arrive. As they sit to discuss their futures, the three realise the one thing they’ve never learned about each other.

Chapter 1: It Can't Be That Bad

A/N: I re-read this and couldn't believe how dreadful it was! So I've spent the afternoon editing it pretty seriously. It's just filled out a bit in places. Hopefully the humour hasn't been lost! Any spelling errors, let me know. I have double checked it but things still creep in!

It Can’t Be That Bad
The golden sun beat down upon the garden, where two children were playing with a ball and three teenagers sat by an algae filled pond. They were in Muggle clothing, their shoes and socks abandoned somewhere inside. They were sat cross-legged, watching their surroundings contentedly. 

The trio were the most unlikely group of friends in several respects. Their mismatched appearance was enough for strangers to notice. Each eighteen-year-old had different hair colours: black, blond and auburn, and differed in their builds greatly. The only girl was tall and stocky, and whilst the blond boy was even taller, he was lanky with legs that seemed to be apart from his body (some Muggle-born students at school had even nicknamed him Bambi). The raven-haired boy was yet to have his final growth-spurt, nearly a head smaller than the redhead, and his slight frame meant he was often the victim of their friendly jokes. 

For those who knew them better, it was a surprise that they got on well with such contrasting personalities. The girl was headstrong and intelligent, with an exceptionally short fuse. The short boy was a bag of nerves, always worrying that what he did wasn’t good enough, and their companion had an air of arrogance and superiority about him at times. 

Then there was the biggest mismatch of all: their families. It was odd enough that two cousins should be best friends, let alone the pair of them befriending a member of a family their own relatives had feuded against for generations. Yes, sat in the garden of The Burrow in the heat of July were Rose Weasley, Albus Potter and Scorpius Malfoy, all laughing jovially amongst themselves. 

A tray of Molly Weasley’s homemade lemonade sat in front of them, multi-coloured straws and little umbrellas decorating the glasses, whilst on their laps were empty bowls coated in the remnants of chocolate ice-cream, a special treat to calm their nerves. 

“I can’t wait until next year,” Scorpius said with an enormous smile, leaning back on the grass. He tucked his arms behind his head and sighed. “Freedom at long last! No parents to tell us what to do, no teachers to tell us off. It'll be bliss. Sheer bliss.” The other two laughed in agreement. 

“I know, I wish these letters would come,” Albus said, searching the sky in earnest. Rose screamed as she looked up too, to see three specks in the distance flying towards her that Albus had missed. Scorpius sat up straight, and the three of them stood up, their bowls clattering to the floor as they raced for the door. 

Scorpius and Rose got there first, their long legs proving advantageous once again. They leant on the kitchen counter to catch their breath for a second before Rose squealed -
“The NEWT letters are here!” 

Albus fell through the back door a second later, clutching his side and glaring at his friends as a round of excited voices filled the air from the kitchen table. All three sets of parents were there, Scorpius’ against their will, along with some other Weasleys, all clutching mugs of tea and coffee, looking a little the worse for wear after the many sleepless nights in anticipation of this day. 

Rose threw the window open just in time as the three owls soared in, sitting politely on the windowsill, waiting patiently for the teenagers to approach. 

"Oh no!” she then added as her owl stuck her leg out. Harry and Ron shared identical looks and burst out laughing, glancing at Hermione as they recalled their OWL results coming. 

“Like mother, like daughter,” Molly laughed, smiling at her daughter-in-law who had gone the colour of Rose’s hair. Hermione glared at her husband and brother-in-law as they caught their breath back, and shushed them, pointing at the backs of the three teenagers as they untied their letters. The owls flew off into the distance, merely three dots on the horizon by the time the sound of the envelopes being torn open echoed through the room. The envelopes fluttered to the floor. There was a split second silence and a scream, a sigh and a shout of triumph erupted from the teenagers. 

“Six Outstandings,” Rose squealed, both of her parents swamping her in a big hug before the last syllable was even out of her mouth. 

“Four Os and an E,” Albus said softly, his dad lifting him up off the ground with a whoop of excitement and a ruffle of his hair as his mother approached to kiss his cheek affectionately. 

“Five Os and an E,” Scorpius yelled, punching the air as his mother smothered him in kisses and his father congratulated him coolly. The trio of teenagers pushed their parents away and began to the compare the sheets of parchment in earnest. 

“So now we need to sit down and think about what you’re going to do,” Hermione announced, shooing George’s thirteen-year-old daughter Roxanne and Bill’s son Louis from the table and into the garden so that they could all sit down comfortably. The three eldest children looked at each other nervously. Rose elbowed her cousin, who stepped forwards jerkily. 

“Aunt Hermione, can’t we just relax for a bit?” Albus asked softly. Hermione looked a bit put out, but after everybody else around the table made sounds of agreement, she nodded and got up to find Hugo, James and Lily to tell them the news. 

“Scorpius, we’re going to get going. Your grandmother wants me to take her to Diagon Alley,” Draco Malfoy said, the relief that he could finally leave evident in his voice. “Just Floo home when you’re ready. Your grandfather will be there.” His wife kissed her son’s head and the Malfoys Apparated away together. 

“Yeah, we’d better go and tell Teddy how you got on,” Ginny added, getting up and kissing Rose and Albus on the cheek and saying a polite goodbye to Scorpius. Harry imitated her and they walked off to find Lily so they could go over to Teddy’s home and tell him the news. Ron, who had still not gotten over his daughter’s friendship with a Malfoy, sat awkwardly at the table for a moment, before his mother took his arm and marched him outside. 

“Welcome to the slightly insane Weasley residence,” Rose muttered, blushing traditional Weasley red. Scorpius laughed lightly. 

“Rose, I’ve learnt loads about you two in the past seven years, we know everything about each other. I know you have some strange family members, so does everybody. Don’t worry,” the blond assured her. 

“Everything about each other,” Albus commented, intrigued. “That’s quite scary. We’ve known each other for seven years.” The other two nodded, sitting down, slightly in awe. There was a second’s silence as they thought about the past few years of friendship: the fights, the tears, the laughs. 

“Actually,” Rose said slowly, after a moment of reflection, “we don’t know your middle name, Scorpius.” 

“I haven’t got one,” Scorpius said quickly, a little bit too quickly. Albus raised an eye disbelievingly. “And anyway I don’t know yours either.” 

“Well, I know you’re lying,” Rose scoffed. Scorpius looked offended and a jerk of his head told Rose to explain. “The envelope for you just then. Mr S H Malfoy?” 

“No, no, you’re imagining it,” Scorpius protested, looking urgently for the envelope. Rose sighed softly, pulled out her wand and Summoned the piece of paper non-verbally. It landed swiftly and neatly in her awaiting hand and she turned to show him.  “Fine, but I’m still not telling you!” 

“It can’t be that bad,” Albus reasoned. “I mean, two of our uncles have Ignatius and Bilius as their middle names.” Scorpius sniggered but then shook his head. 

“I’m not telling you! It is worse than those two.” 

“What’s worse than Bilius?” Rose asked incredulously as James and Hugo wandered in from upstairs, clearly having been ordered there by Hermione to offer congratulations to their siblings. 

“Nymphadora,” Albus said, without thinking. He clapped a hand over his mouth and Rose turned to her cousin, gobsmacked. She stood up, put her hands on her hips and let her mouth hang open in awe. 

“AL!” she exclaimed, looking ready to hit him as James and Hugo began to snigger behind the black-haired boy, who began to cower slightly. Rose was the Weasley with the worst temper by far. Hugo always claimed that all the temper genes had been used up on Rose, and although Dominique could throw a fairly hefty tantrum when she wanted to, with the combination of Veela blood and the Weasley temper, no-one was more terrifying than an angry Rose. 

“Ah, Rosie, it could be worse. It could be SEVERUS,” James declared as his cousin grew redder in the face. Scorpius laughed loudly as Albus hit out at his brother, whose years of dodging the back of his mother’s hand proved useful as he stepped neatly out of the line of the swing. “And I’ve got a decent middle name, so you can’t even use that against me!” he added smugly, walking into the garden with a grin plastered on his face. Albus banged his head on the table in despair. 

“See? Our parents have no taste in names, so come on Scorpius H Malfoy, what does that initial stand for?” Rose asked, smiling sweetly. The blond groaned and ran a hand through his hair. “Oh, Scorpius, come on. You’re eighteen, we’re not going to stop being your friends just because you have a middle name that’s worse than Severus and Nymphadora.” 

“Yeah, they’re friends with you with that stupid first name, what difference will a silly middle name make?” Scorpius turned to look at James, who had wandered back in with Roxanne on his back. The thirteen-year-old giggled and James hurried off with her upstairs before Rose could launch one of her ‘You and your prejudices, James Potter, will do you no good...’ rants. 

“Sorry,” Albus and Rose chorused in identical monotone voices. Scorpius shook his head. He was used to it by now: James had never forgiven Rose and Al for befriending the boy who had prevented Gryffindor from completing a 7-year hold on the Quidditch cup by catching the Snitch in the last Quidditch match of James’ last year. The eldest Potter had been so angry that Rose and Scorpius had to avoid visiting Al in Gryffindor Tower, just in case James launched himself at the Ravenclaw Seeker. 

“No, he’s right. I think my dad was on drugs when he named me,” the blond muttered. The clock in the living room rang out two bells. Scorpius checked his watch. “I should get going. My grandfather will want to congratulate me, and Gran will want to take me out. Are you coming round tomorrow?” 

“Yeah,” Rose and Albus chorused, getting up to escort their friend to the fireplace. 

“Well I’ll see you then Rose Nymphadora Weasley and Albus Severus Potter,” Scorpius said with a small chuckle, taking some Floo powder from the pot Rose was holding. 

“Yeah, see you Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy,” the girl replied, her voice jaunty but showing no sign of there being anything wrong with what she’d said. Albus, who had taken a sip of Molly’s lemonade just at the wrong moment, snorted and sprayed the drink over the floor at his feet. Scorpius, who was preparing to step into the fire, swivelled and opened his mouth like a goldfish. “Next time, don’t leave your stuff lying about, Malfoy.” 

“Whatever, Weasley, Potter,” he said, snatching his stolen results sheet off Rose, who winked at him cheekily. Despite trying to keep a straight face, Scorpius let a small chuckle escape and gave a defeated sigh as Albus and Rose laughed from either side of the fireplace. He made a rude gesture in their direction before stepping into the grate, cursing his parents’ poor naming skills and his friends’ inquisitive natures.

A/N: Dedicated to: Rhiannon, Laura, and Emma. You lot all inspired me to write this originally. Thank you all so much. I love you, even if you'll never read this!