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Her Feelings by CrazyForYou

Format: One-shot
Chapters: 1
Word Count: 1,073
Status: COMPLETED

Rating: 15+
Warnings: Sensitive Topic/Issue/Theme

Genres: Fluff, General
Characters: Neville, Ginny
Pairings: Harry/Ginny

First Published: 01/21/2008
Last Chapter: 01/25/2008
Last Updated: 01/25/2008

Summary:
Harry, Hermione, and Ron are out searching for Horocruxes. Ginny, back at Hogwarts, is missing them (especially Harry). She expresses her thoughts, and begins to cope with his absence


Chapter 1: Her feelings

Enjoy =)








A young, red head, sat in her seat, looking bored. She tried to focus, and listen to the lecture, but the professor was making no sense. He was rambling, droning on in his slow, monotonous voice. 

She looked down at the parchment where she was supposed to be taking notes. It was blank. 

She let her mind wander. It wandered to a certain dark haired boy, with glasses, who was off with her brother and their best friend, hunting the Dark Lord. She missed them. If they had been here, she wouldn’t eat by herself at lunch, she wouldn’t lay awake at night thinking of them, praying for them. 

She missed that boy; she missed him with all her heart. And yet she chastised herself for her feelings. 

He had broken her heart; he had dumped her, saying that he wanted to protect her. And yet, even though she had refused to let him go, he had pushed her away. 

When she had seen him over the summer, she had been unable to really look him in the eye. She wasn’t ready to face the feelings she might see, the longing, the love, or the emptiness. She wasn’t sure, but she wasn’t anxious to find out, either.

She found herself writing a poem on her note taking parchment. 



Love is dreaming of YOU
Love is thinking of YOU
Love is wanting YOU
Love is hoping for YOU
Love is waiting for YOU
Love is holding YOU
Love is YOU!

 

Ginny Weasley sighed. She was only 16, but she had fallen head over heels for this boy, since the moment she had set eyes on him. Even after he had pushed her away, she still clung to her childhood crush. 

The bell rang. Finally, she was free of that class. 

 

The Next Time in That Class

 
It was fifteen minutes into the period and she had already written another poem.

 

It’s a roller coaster ride.
One moment you’re soaring,
Riding on a high.
The next moment,
You’re falling,
A seemingly endless drop.
And then, with a neck-breaking halt,
You’re on your way up again.
You’re laughing,
Crying, and screaming,
Seeing your life,
Your world,
Flash before your eyes.
It’s a crazy whirlwind of emotions.
It is love.

 

“Sheesh,” she thought to herself. “No wonder I hate this class, I somehow find myself writing poems. Writing poems about a guy I’m trying to get over. Ugh. I guess I have to convince myself I don’t like him.”

Finally, the bell rang, and Professor Binns looked up, but half the class was gone, so he was unable to assign homework. 

“Yes!” the students crowed.
 

The next day was Saturday, so Ginny got a break from having to listen to him drone on. She went to Hogsmade with her friends to get a break from the creepy Death-Eater teachers. 


On Monday she found herself sitting at her desk in History of Magic. She was kind of excited because she knew she wasn’t going to be writing any love poems. She had spent a good portion of the weekend telling herself that she didn’t like Harry any more. 

Her brain was telling her that she had really good arguments. How he had broken up with her, how he had pushed her away, how he had led her on, how he was her brother’s best friend, how he probably didn’t even remember her, the list went on. But her heart refused to let go. Halfway through the class, she found herself doodling hearts on her paper. She looked down and saw that inside the largest, it said “Harry James Potter”. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me. I swear this class brings out the worst in me.” She moaned to herself. 

After having spent most of the weekend telling herself to get over him, she couldn’t even sit in class for thirty minutes without thinking about him. 

“Great. That’s just great.”

After class, she sought out Neville in the Great Hall. He gave her a hug, greeting her as a friend. She felt bad for having avoided him all year, but she had thought that he would bring back too many memories, memories of Ron, memories of Hermione, and of course, memories of times spent with Harry.

Instead, after getting to know him, she realized that he was also struggling to cope with the pain of them not being there.

 

Friday, two weeks later

 

Ginny was fighting to stay awake, lost in her musings of Harry, her brother, and Hermione, when it hit her. She grabbed her parchment and began to write, scribbling furiously so she could capture her feelings on paper. 

She was writing so avidly that Professor Binns looked up from his notes to see what student was so enraptured by his lecture. He saw Ginny and smiled at her, but she was so intent on writing it all down so she ignored him. He coughed slightly, startling her. She looked up and smiled angelically at him. He was enthralled.

“Ten points to Gryffindor, Ms. Weasley, I’m so excited that you have been paying so much attention to my lessons.”

Ginny blushed, and looked down at her paper. “Um…Thank you Professor,” she mumbled.
 


Everyday I wake, and then it hits me,
You’re gone.
You used to be there for me,
You used to smile at me in the hall.
You used to sit with me
You used to laugh at my jokes.
And now you’re gone.
You said you wanted to keep me safe
To minimize the pain
But your absence hurts
Your absence cuts,
It burns.
I’ve lain awake at night,
Crying,
Or lost in my thoughts.
Now, I’ve come to realize
That I need to move on.
Not leave you behind,
But keep living my life.
I’m surrounded by friends,
I’m surrounded by memories,
But I’m not going to let them
Pull me down.
I’ll stand strong,
And wait.












A/N - The poems are mine =)
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