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My Baby Girl’s Wedding by obsessive

Format: Novella
Chapters: 21
Word Count: 47,941
Status: WIP

Rating: 15+
Warnings: Mild Language, Mild Violence, Substance Use or Abuse, Sensitive Topic/Issue/Theme, Contains Spoilers

Genres: General, Humor, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew, OC
Pairings: James/Lily, Snape/Lily, OC/OC

First Published: 04/23/2007
Last Chapter: 02/23/2009
Last Updated: 02/23/2009

My name is Edward Evans. About thirty years ago I married my wife Kendra, and we have two daughters. One of them eloped with a man I can’t stand. My youngest is the only one I have left, and there is no way I’m going to let her walk down the aisle. Especially not with James Potter waiting at the alter. Yay! Over 17,000 reads!!!

Chapter 9: Baby Boy Dursley

Disclaimer: The Plot and Lily’s parents are all my doing. However Lily and James aren’t mine. I’m not JKR and this is in no way connected to her. Live with it.

AN: I’ve noticed that lately these chapters haven’t been as funny as some of the others. I’m trying really hard to bring that back and if you think that I’m successful let me know. Please and thank you.

The tea ended in the usual fashion, but with one small difference. Potter and Black left together. Black complimenting Kendra as much as he could, and James kissing Lily goodbye delicately and lovingly, but usually when if finally came time for them to leave each other’s company they would stare deeply into each other’s eyes, until I had no choice, but to grab him by his elbow and steer him out by hand. He kissed her, like he always did, then turned and left with his best friend, without saying a word to her.

This small fact didn’t escape the notice of Kendra, and it especially didn’t go unnoticed by Lily. She stood stalk still as the door closed with a snap. She didn’t move from the point where James had left her. I looked her over, with a small sense of satisfaction, as she stood in shock at his cold departure. Then her eyes started to water. I didn’t move from my place at the door. Finally the tears made their expected appearance, but before anyone could so much as blink Lily was up the steps in a flash of dark red hair.

As fast as Little Lily Lou had moved, her mother was faster. Before I could even inhale again after the disappearance of my daughter Kendra had smacked me across the head again. I turned to look at her in time to see her hand swinging towards me again. It made contact with my skull again, so this time I had to grab a hold of her wrist and move quickly out of the range of fire.

“What did you do!” she hollered stomping on my foot. “What did you do! Edward! Tell me what you did! What did you do! What! What! What! What!” she yelled at the top of her lungs, all the while stomping my feet and whacking every inch of me she could reach, from the distance I was holding her at. Finally after five minutes of this she calmed down and started growling at me, “Edward Evans what did you do?”

“Why do you automatically assume that I did something?” I demanded. She stomped on my foot again. Unlike all the other times she dug her heel deep as deep into my foot as it would go. Without even thinking about it, I reached the same as James did when Lily kicked him in the shin earlier. Eyes watering and crying out in pain I reached over and grabbed my aching foot. While I was down Kendra smacked me across the head again. Then she grabbed my face and forced me to look at her.

“Are you really going to make me answer that question?” she growled menacingly. I quailed under her look. I love my wife, but she is one of the scariest things to graze the phase of the planet when she gets angry. I always snap like a Christmas cracker whenever she gets mad. She squeezed my ear really, really, really hard to speed up my confession.

“I threatened Lily.”


“Information that I weaseled out of Petunia, when she was over two weeks ago.”

“What information.”

Before I could stop myself I was telling her every thing. “Lily used to be friends with a boy named Severus Snape who is now and Death Eater, and James hates Snape with the burning passion of a thousand suns, and he doesn’t know that he and Lily used to be friends, and Little Love doesn’t want him to find out.”

“And you blackmailed Lily by threatening to tell James about Severus,” she was yelling again.

“Yes, and oh OW!” I hollered as she squeezed my ear even harder. “OW! Let go! OW! OW! You mad old bat! OW!” My screams of pain only made her pinch harder.

“I hope for your sake that this is a joke!” I shook my head, eyes watering. Kendra took a deep breath and let go of my ear. I straightened up slowly, testing to see if she was going to freak out again. Once I was fully on my feet she had her eyes closed and was breathing slowly. I put a hand on her shoulder trying to help her calm down even further. Without warning she smacked me clean across the face. “You are an inconsiderate, irrational, dung head, who isn’t even worth the time to wipe off the bottom of my shoe!”

Finally she turned around and stormed up the stair to our room. I left her alone until it was time to go to bed. Once I reached the top of the steps and knocked on out door, she pulled it open with a crash. I opened my mouth to speak, but I didn’t even get a chance to start apologizing. She just shoved an extra pillow and blanket into my arms and slammed the door in my face.


It was three days before Potter came over again, and, considering he usually couldn’t stay away for more than twelve hours, that was bad. In those three days my wife had forced me to sleep on the couch and hadn’t even acknowledged my presence. She hadn’t even spoken to me. She hadn’t poured my coffee, set me a place at dinner, or even looked at me. I hadn’t had any human contact for three days. My Little Lou would emerge from her room every meal. She would only see us and lose control. Crying hysterically, she’d shake her head and return to her room without a word.

When James finally did stop by for the first time in three days, it was early and my day off work. I was still asleep on the couch when there were three sharp raps on the door. “Kendra!” I called not even bothering to open my eyes. However she’d been ignoring me for three days, and I didn’t expect for her to respond. With a groan I pulled myself off the couch and opened the front door. Potter was standing on the threshold. His hair as messily windswept as possible and his hazel eyes ripe with concern.

“Wow,” he mumbled softly. “What happened to you?”

“For your information, Potter,” I spat his name out with hatred. “I just woke up. It’s a tad early to be paying an unannounced visit.”

“All due respect, Mr. Evans, but it’s nearly eleven,” he informed me politely. I gestured him into the house with a glare and a glower. He stopped when he saw the couch with my pillow and blanket still on it. “You’re sleeping on the couch?”

“No,” I snapped at the nosey slim ball. “Not that that’s any of your business.”

“You were just taking a nap on the couch in your pajamas at eleven in the morning?”

“What do you want Potter?” I growled at him.

“Is Lily home? Remus said she’d owled in sick from work for the past three days.” I didn’t answer; I just glared. He kept on babbling, “I just thought she needed a break or something. She’s not really into magical sports or games, but she was supposed to meet my parents and I for lunch yesterday, but Lils never showed, and that’s not like her,” He paused waiting for my answer. When none came he just plunged on. “Is she home? Is everything ok?” he asked quickly.

I glowered. “I’m sorry Potter, I guess that Kendra was too busy making me sleep on the couch to send you an owl. She has barely left her room for the past three days. All I have seen her doing is crying since you left with your mate after that tea party.” James froze at these words. “No thanks to…” I trailed off suddenly realizing that for the first time in seventeen days I was alone with him. Lily was up in her room sobbing uncontrollably, and god only knows where Kendra was. There was no one to stop me from telling him. Telling him about it all, Snape, Lily lying. I opened my mouth again, but no words came out. He looked at me, clearly braced for a lecture. I let my mouth hang open stupidly, but before I could think up a way to deliver my fatal blow to his engagement there was a squeak from the stairs.

“James?” We both turned to see a girl with dark red hair
standing on the step, still in her white flannel pajama pants and white tank top. She had a tissue up to her noise and her eyes were red and puffy, more so than I’d ever seen them, to go with her red blotchy skin. Her hair was a mess, and it was clear that it hadn’t been brushed in days. “James?” she repeated when he didn’t say anything. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to check on you,” he told her quickly bounding up the steps, two at a time, and taking a hold of her shoulders to steady her as she swayed slightly on her feet. “I hadn’t heard from you in a couple of days, and I started to get worried. Everything’s ok right?” Lily nodded her tear stained face. He looked at her skeptically. “Lily? What is it? What’s wrong? What happened? The reason for the date didn’t change did it?” She tried to wave her arms to signal him to stop, but he plunged on. “Because if it did I’m fine with that. In fact I’d be thrilled with.”

“James,” she tried to stop him.

“Well,” he said reluctantly, “Maybe not thrilled, but I would be ok with it. It’s not like I’d run out on you or anything. Really. It’s all alright. Because if that’s it maybe it doesn’t seem like it now, but everything’s going to be ok.”

“James no the reason for the date hasn’t changed.”

“Then what’s wrong?” Lily opened her mouth, but no words came out. “Lils?” I could see her eyes starting to get even more watery. It was hard to tell because of how soaked they were already, but as I focused on her face I could see more tears joining the previously accumulated moisture. Her bottle green eyes wandered over to me. I could tell when I wasn’t wanted, so, standing up, I made my way over to the kitchen where found Kendra sitting looking like she was ready to talk. I sat down next to her slowly.

“You didn’t tell him?” I shook my head. She nodded slowly. “Did you want to?” I nodded. “But you didn’t?” I shook my head again. She smiled. “Lily interrupted you right before didn’t she?” I knew that no matter what I had to be honest. I nodded. She smiled and nodded again. “Tell you what Edward, today is September tenth. The wedding is in a little less than two months. You can sleep on the couch until it happens.”

I felt my mouth drop open, “But what if it never happens?”
“Then the sitting room can just become your new bedroom till death do us part.” I banged my head on the table.

“I hate you.” She smiled again at these words.

“Then I’ve finally achieved the proper role of a wife set down by my predecessors,” she said as she set down a cup of coffee down in front of me. Lily walked in with James standing right behind her. Little Lou was looking better than she had in three days, but still it looked as though she had just been run over by a truck. She was still a little unstable on her feet, and Potter had to keep his hands on her waist to help her stay upright. Slowly he steered her into a seat next to her mother. He stayed standing and rubbed her shoulders to make sure she was still taking deep steadying breaths. Kendra smiled at his show of chivalry. I looked away, not being able to stand the sight of his hands on my precious sweet heart.


An hour later Lily had regained control of herself completely, but Potter was still fussing over her so much that he wouldn’t let her walk. She had remained sitting at the kitchen table having tea being forced down her throat. Finally the boy was confident enough in her mental health to start talking about matters of actual substance. He sat down calmly next to Lily, while I put another cup of tea in front of our youngest daughter, Kendra having gone to get the mail. She pushed it away looking a little green now. James started moving his hands in a circler motion along her back.

“Listen…” he started cautiously. Lily looked up from examining the kitchen table. “Remus was wondering if once you would be up for lunch?” Lily let out a little sniff. Potter tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

“Lunch with the Marauders?” He nodded. “Doesn’t that sound a little exhausting?” He laughed at this statement. He stopped though when Lily started to look a little green again.

“Listen if you’re not up for it I’m sure they’ll understand. It’s no big deal, but Peter hasn’t seen you in ages, and Remus wants to meet your parents.” I looked up at these words. He turned to look at me. “So all three of you are invited to lunch with the marauders on Diagon Alley tomorrow at noon.” Kendra came in as he stated the last statement. She was looking through the mail and opening a letter, with Petunia’s handwriting on it.

“That sounds wonderful James. Lily will have to show us how to get to the place, where are we having lunch and Oh my god!” she shrieked in happiness while reading Petunia’s letter. I sat up looking hopeful.

“What is Tuney divorcing Vernon?” I asked, my voice dripping with excitement. Kendra shook her head still smiling like a fool. Of course I didn’t understand how she could be so happy. If they weren’t getting divorced what good news could come from the Dursleys.

“Petunia’s expecting!” she squealed jumping up and down. Lily screamed too and jumped up, and before Potter or I could move the two women were bouncing around the room, screaming in jubilation. My daughter’s fiancé was on his feet before I could even blink again.

“Wow, wow, wow, Lils. Slow down. Take it easy,” he fused concernedly, making Lily sit back down in a kitchen chair. She kept on squealing though and clapping her hands from her chair. I looked at them shocked. How could they be celebrating this? James seemed to be thinking a long the same lines and looked at them confused. “I thought you weren’t happy about Petunia marrying Vernon.”

“Thank you!” I called pointing at James. Both girls stopped and looked at us offended. Then without a word the two women stood up and left the room noses in the air. Potter and I were left sitting at the kitchen table in complete silence. I looked at him angrily. He looked back at me. “Just to let you know that was one of the moments where you shouldn’t have said anything.”

“Well your addition probably didn’t help,” he snapped. I could feel myself turning red and my eyes getting wider. He sifted positions uncomfortably. “You know…I think…I’m just…goanna go.” He mumbled looking at me a little scared, “So…if you could just…tell…Lily we’re…meeting at Frank’s…tomorrow…if I’m still alive...that is,” He was getting out of his seat now. “That’d be great,” he stammered quickly, just before making a mad dash for the door.