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We Couldn't Bring the Columns Down by ladyspirit

Format: Novel
Chapters: 21
Word Count: 59,752
Status: WIP

Rating: Mature
Warnings: Strong Language, Strong Violence, Scenes of a Sexual Nature, Substance Use or Abuse, Sensitive Topic/Issue/Theme, Contains Spoilers

Genres: General, Humor, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Snape, Sirius, Lily, James, Lucius, Narcissa, OC
Pairings: Other Pairing, James/Lily, Lucius/Narcissa, Sirius/OC

First Published: 05/21/2007
Last Chapter: 06/23/2011
Last Updated: 06/23/2011


“STOP THE MADNESS!” James was screaming, his face glowing with mirth. Apparently his groin was recovering. Sirius rolled onto his back,  he had his wand out and it was pointed at Lily.
Read it now or Regret it Later. You have been warned.OVER 29,500 READS! 
Oh yes and fyi this'll be the best thing you ever read.

Chapter 5: She Was Someone Else

Delilah was sitting against the headboard of her bed; tears streamed helplessly along her paled cheeks as the clock on the wall ticked towards midnight. There was a box of twenty cigarettes laying beside her shaking feet, she’d already burned through ten of them. She’d pulled her drapes closed but she could still hear Angelica and her friends muttering to each other; probably bitching about her, she thought miserably.

It was a horrible feeling, she thought, to have her heart pour out through her eyes. It was a gruesome image but an accurate description of the pain she felt. She couldn’t believe that just a few hours before she had felt so close to happiness wrapped in the scent of Lucius and the heat of his arms. She stubbed cigarette number ten out on her scarred headboard and dumped it into a jewellery box she had brought to school to specifically play the role of an ashtray. She lit number eleven with shaking, polish-chipped fingers and inhaled the smoke even though she was beginning to feel ill. She couldn’t not smoke, she had to do something and she couldn’t eat. She leaned her head back to stare at the canopy of her bed through a veil of tears, her neck and neck of her t-shirt were sopping already but the tears just wouldn’t stop. 

“Shit! Shit!” Lucius jumped to his feet and began struggling into his clothes, “Fuck!”

“Oh no…” Delilah mirrored him although at a much less rapid pace. Her world seemed to be moving in slow motion. They’d done this for almost two years… how could someone find out now…? She buckled her belt then reached a hand out for Lucius and started to tell him things would be OK but he jerked out of her reach. Her hand closed over the empty air in front of him, her face crumpled in confusion.

“Don’t fucking touch me,”

She’d never forget the look on his face; the utter revulsion, the hatred. That looked had ripped her apart. She couldn’t cry, she could speak, she couldn’t rely on anger, she’d went blank, she couldn’t have moved even if she’d wanted to. It was as if someone had pulled the rug from under her feet and she was tottering backwards; in limbo, neither up nor down. She buried her face in her knees, her white jeans were stained with eye shadow and floods of mascara tears.

Every happy memory she had with him was suddenly overshadowed. She grasped desperately through her thoughts trying to remember his face in any expression but that twisted, evil one, but she couldn’t do it. She thought back to their first kiss, the most public of all their kisses, it had been the final Hogsmeade trip before Christmas in their fifth year. They’d already been flirting for weeks, ever since he’d had to save Andromeda Black from being impaled on a unicorn that Delilah had accidentally spooked in Care of Magical Creatures. The snow had fallen thick and soft all over the village, Delilah and Lily had separated to buy each other Christmas presents and Delilah came across Lucius standing outside Honeyduke’s with his pale face practically pressed against the steamy glass.

“What are you doing?” She asked sliding up beside him and trying to peek in the window he seemed so interested in.

“Nothing.” He grinned suspiciously and turned away from the window. He really was beautiful; tall and lean with pale, regal features and platinum hair that curled loosely below his ears. He was so close to looking utterly angelic but there was something in his eyes, in his expression that robbed him of innocence. There was something dark and inviting about Lucius Malfoy.

“You’re obviously doing something- are you spying on someone?” She stared hard at the bustling shop and Lucius shrugged, “Go on tell me,” She urged

He smirked at her, “Fine. I’m watching your friend.”

Delilah frowned and scanned the shop again and sure enough, there was Lily arguing with James Potter by the caramel creams. “Why were you watching Lily?” She asked, “Are you some sort of peeping Tom, chocolate shop pervert?”

“No,” Lucius snorted, “I’m trying to get some clues on what the get you for Christmas.”

Delilah felt herself flush delightedly, “Oh?” She beamed, “Well you can never go wrong with chocolate. I’m particularly fond of caramel.”

Lucius was smiling strangely at her then, without warning he lent in and pressed his cool lips against her soft, warm ones. For a moment Delilah stood stock still with her eyes wide open and shocked then, before she could relax, he had pulled back.

“What was that for?” She croaked and Lucius pointed up.

“Mistletoe,” He began walking away, “I had to do it, those are the rules,” 

Don’t fucking touch me. She dumped number eleven unfinished into her jewellery box and just enjoyed the empty knowledge that it would slowly burn to nothing more than an orange stub. Maybe if she lay still for long enough she would burn up and end. She crawled, fully dressed under her blanket and pulled it over her head making the decision to never again emerge from her covers. They could pry her cold, dead corpse from this bed for all she cared.

“There’s no point trying, she won’t come out of there, she’s been under those rotten covers all day,” Delilah could hear Angelica sneering disgustedly, “Stupid attention seeking idiot,”

“It’s hardly attention seeking to stay in bed,” Came the slightly annoyed response, “Anyway, I need to speak to her,”

“Fine but you’re not even meant to be in this tower,” The sound of the door opening wider reached Delilah’s ears and her sisters footsteps towards her bed. She snuggled further into her blankets and prayed Jessica would go away but alas the drapes were pulled aside.

“Delilah? I need to talk to you,” Jessica’s voice would not be muffled by the blankets. Delilah let out a very unrealistic snore and Jessica grabbed a handful of covers and began to trail them off Delilah who clutched at them desperately but fatigue from too much sleep and not enough food had left her weak and she was soon mercilessly exposed to the fading daylight. She groaned and curled into the foetal position aware that she still fully clothed and smeared in makeup.

“Oh lord,” Jessica groaned, “Are you doing drugs?” Delilah ignored her, she closed her eyes hoping that it would make Jessica disappear. After all she was in Hogwarts; stranger things had happened. “Delilah! Answer me right now! Are you on drugs?”

Delilah sat up and scowled, “No I’m not on drugs,” She snapped, “Jesus. Can’t a girl sleep in nowadays? Does it always have to be sordid?”

“It’s nearly six PM Delilah, that’s hardly a lie in and anyway why are you still in last nights clothes? Have you been drinking?”

“No!” Delilah sat up and made room for her sister on the bed. Jessica climbed on and they watched each other silently, it had been so long since they talked properly that neither was quite sure how it worked.

“Are you alright?” Jessica asked, “Lily said she couldn’t even tempt you to Hogsmeade,”

“I’m just tired.”

“Have you been crying?”


“OK… Well… Can we talk in private?” Jessica glanced over at Angelica who had begun plucking her eyebrows by the mirror.

“I don’t know, ask Angelica,”

“Oh for goodness sake!” Angelica slammed her tweezers down, “I’m going to dinner anyway! You Hufflepuffs are so selfish!”

When Angelica had left Jessica scanned the dormitory thoughtfully, her eyes rested on the bathroom door “In here,” She got up and Delilah followed her into the bathroom where she proceeded to lock the door and press her ear up against it as though making sure Angelica hadn‘t crept back in to eavesdrop. Delilah put down the toilet seat and sat down watching her sisters curious movements with dull, uninterested eyes.

“Well?” She persisted when Jessica seemed satisfied they wouldn’t be overheard, “What’s brought you all the way up here? I’m assuming this is more than a social call? Is it mum?”

“No, no, it’s not mum,” Jessica wrung her hands anxiously then perched herself on the edge of the bath and stared at her feet, “I’ve done something incredibly stupid, Delilah,”

“Well you are the stupid twin.”

“Delilah!” Jessica looked as if she wanted to be annoyed but something was worrying her too much to brood on annoyance, “This is serious! I’ve done something so stupid! So incredibly stupid!” She was still twisting her hands desperately and when she looked up from them to meet her sisters gaze her eyes were brimming with unshed tears, “I slept with Sirius Black,” Her voice was barely more than a whisper and Delilah felt her jaw drop.

“You did what?” She gasped. She would have been less surprised if Jessica had admitted to a clown fetish and that she was now running away with Severus Snape to join the circus. Well maybe the same amount of surprised. “How? How?… Since when-… I don’t-… What?”

“Today,” Jessica bit her lip anxiously, “We went to Hogsmeade together and I don’t know what happened… He was just so charming and nice and you know how good looking he is and then… oh I can’t believe I was so stupid!”

“Well…” Delilah tried to compose herself, “I suppose it’s not too bad. I mean it’s not like you’re the only girl who’s ever fallen for Sirius Black’s charms. I know it sucks now but you’ll get over him,” She tried to sound sympathetic but obviously failed as Jessica burst into tears, “Shit!” Delilah hissed rising from the toilet and going to her sister, she put her arm around her awkwardly and wondered why Jessica had come to her, she had friends she was much closer to, “Don’t cry, it’s not that bad! The old hump and dump is a real asshole thing for him to do but-,”

“No!” Jessica sobbed, “You don’t get it!” She was practically wailing, “He asked me out and I said yes, we’re dating and I really like him!”

Delilah was now officially confused, “Then... What’s your problem?”

Jessica took in a deep, shaky, tear-wracked breath then wailed, “He thinks I’m YOU!”

Delilah was so shocked she lost her balance on the edge of the bath and crashed backwards into it. She stared up at her sister with her feet above her head and began to laugh, “No seriously,” She snorted and Jessica shook her head sadly.

“Last night when he asked me out he thought I was you, then today he thought I was you, then when we slept together he thought I was you and then after that he called me Delilah and I realised.” She took another one of her huge asthmatic style breaths and watched her sisters face twist in a rainbow of emotions ranging from pure amusement to utter horror.

“What did he say when you told him-,”

“I didn’t! I couldn’t! I was so embarrassed! He can’t ever know!” Jessica’s eyes were wide and earnest, “I’d rather die than have him know! Delilah, don’t you get it? I lost my virginity to him! I threw it away to a boy who doesn’t even know my name or that he slept with me! He thinks I’m you! He fancies you! Not me!”

“Sirius Black doesn’t fancy me,” Delilah snorted automatically as she climbed out of the bath, “If he fancied me he wouldn’t have-,”

“Delilah as far as he’s concerned he just made love to you in his dormitory and has asked you out. He fancies you. Get over it.” Fresh tears streamed down Jessica’s cheeks, “I feel so dirty,”

Delilah rolled her eyes and hugged her sister tight, “It’s OK, it’s not your fault, you could have done worse things,”

“I just-,” She sniffled horribly, “I just sensed this awesome connection you know? I thought ‘wow I really like this guy and he really likes me’, I thought I’d be spontaneous for once and just take a chance and I did and then I find out that I’m not even me!”

“Of course you’re you!”

“Sirius doesn’t think so!”

“Oh lord,” Delilah suddenly felt sick, “So now Sirius- and probably all the marauders- think I’ve shagged him?”

Jessica sobbed even louder, “It’s so humiliating!”

“Jessica you have to tell him you’re you. He can’t think he slept with me,”

“But he can’t know!” Jessica gasped clutching her sisters shoulders and shaking her, “Please Delilah! Please pretend! I’ll do anything! Anything you want!”

“Pretend what?” Delilah shrieked, “Pretend I did sleep with him? Pretend after everything he’s done that I was willing to hop in the sack with him?”

“Please!” Jessica wailed, “Please- just for a few days- pretend to date him then you can break up with him and he’ll never know! Please!”

“Jessica I can’t!”

“Please!” She cried sliding from the edge of the bath to the floor and hugging her twins legs, “Please, I’ll do whatever you want! Please, I can’t let him know- No one can find out- I don’t know if I could live with the shame, I don’t think I could do it!”

Delilah stared at her sister pityingly, “Just for a few days,” She sighed already regretting her decision, “Then that’s it. I’m dumping him.”

“Oh thank you, thank you,” Jessica stood up and flung her arms around her sister, “You’re the best sister ever,” She continued hugging her then pulled back, wiping her eyes, “He’s in the common room waiting for you to go to dinner,”

“No,” Delilah pushed her hair back from her eyes, “I’ve plans to spend all night up here, I’ll start operation break up tomorrow,”

“I don’t know if-,”

“Jess, deal with it. I’m staying up here, having a nice shower and going to bed early. That’s the way this is happening. You go, have dinner, be me and maybe start picking fights with our boyfriend. Got it?”

“Ok,” Jessica nodded bravely, “OK, my name’s Delilah Tyler and I’m Sirius Black’s girlfriend.”

“Yuck, it even sounds disgusting,” Delilah scrunched up her nose, “Now wipe your eyes and change out of that summer dress, Lily will see through you in a second.”

“Oh no Lily-,”

“Look don’t worry. She’s loved up with James she’ll barely speak to you at dinner. Just don’t eat much, wear some of my clothes and make fun of Peter a bit.”

When Jessica left the dormitory twenty minutes later with her makeup redone and costume in place Delilah climbed into the shower to ponder the craziness of what had happened. So, technically, she’d shagged Sirius Black and was his girlfriend- without even leaving the dormitory. Sometimes life was incredibly strange. She thought of her sisters tear stained face and tried to forget the surge of jealousy that had occurred in her gut when Jessica admitted to sleeping with Sirius. Because she’d decided she didn’t fancy Sirius. Not one bit. Still, she thought savagely as she rubbed her hair with shampoo, it would be interesting to see how Lucius would react to her new relationship status. 

A tension had been building steadily between Lucius’ shoulder blades as the minutes and hours ticked by and he received no owls of disgust from his family. He’d taken up residence in an armchair in the Slytherin room common room and turned it strategically to face the girls staircase but still he had not seen her, still he did not know what she was planning. He had not slept, he had not ate but he had waited, oh yes he had waited and he would be damned if this Black sister destroyed him.

His eyelids felt heavy but he would not allow them to close for if he slept and missed his chance to hush Andromeda then he could never forgive himself. His long, pale fingers drummed on the arms of his chair; a subconscious outpouring of his nerves.

She had to say she’d stay quiet; she had to. If she told then it was over, he and Delilah would be over and he didn’t know if he could stand it. He wasn’t strong enough for it to happen yet, maybe in a few months time he could grow up but not yet… please not yet.

He thought of never holding her, never sharing a secret smile with her across the Great Hall, of never pretending they would grow up together again and the thought chilled him to the bone.

Maybe it came with being a spoilt child but Lucius had always wanted what he couldn’t have and back in his fifth year there had been something desperately alluring about the chubby, Gryffindor, Mudblood; Delilah. She was so much a muggleborn that she didn’t know enough to respect his blood or his name; she had treated him like an equal because she didn’t know better and it intrigued him. He’d taught her to care about blood and she’d taught him, in the tiniest way, not to.

It wasn’t that he hadn’t considered throwing caution into the wind and turning traitor… It was more that he hoped he wouldn’t have to. He went to bed every night hoping that the next morning he’d wake up and not care about her anymore but each morning he would rise caring more and it became a vicious cycle until he couldn’t bare to be with her or to leave her.

He couldn’t disappoint his family; his mother especially. He was the only heir to one of the greatest wizarding families in the world and he couldn’t do that to his mother; he couldn’t destroy the name she held so dear. He thought of her pale, pretty face that got thinner every time he saw her, of her breathy, wheezing voice and he couldn’t bare the thought of being the final straw; the thing that finally killed her.

He ran a hand through his tousled hair in agitation and considered his options. If Andromeda did tell or had already told what could he do? As far as he could figure there were three options; number one was to deny, call Andromeda a liar and go on the offensive, maybe even claim to have seen her getting it on with a Mudblood. Number two, admit to it but claim it to have been a one time thing, possibly a dare or a bet and maybe even claim to have been horrendously drunk; but even then his mother would be disappointed. Number three was the option that set his heart racing and his palms moistening; he could admit to it and stand by Delilah; he could tell his parents he loved a beautiful, muggleborn, witch and there was nothing anyone could do about it. There was something disgustingly Gryffindor about option three but, for some reason, it was the option he was unwillingly hoping for.

Although the thought of people finding out was terrifying, Lucius couldn’t help but think that the reality would be wonderful. He wouldn’t have to grow up and be his father with a wife like that idiotic Narcissa Black who cared about nothing more than names and parties. He wouldn’t have to take a stupid ministry job and spend all his time pouring over documents and keeping on top of ‘The household affairs’. He and Delilah would find their own norm and break this constricting mould he’d been born into. She’d write her songs and sing for change wearing something white and floating and he wasn’t sure what he’d do but he knew he’d love her. He knew he’d be happy.

Andromeda was suddenly in front of him with a queer expression on her face, “Are you waiting for me?” She asked and for a moment Lucius didn’t want to know. He wanted to go back to his dormitory and not know what way his life was going to go.

He was at a cross roads, he could feel it. This was a fundamental moment to what his life would become and he wasn’t sure which way he hoped it would swing, “You don’t have to worry,” Andromeda told him watching his expression closely, “I’m not going to tell anyone- I swear it,”

Lucius nodded slowly and his face fell to face his lap, “Thank you.”