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From Hate To Love And Back Again by Irish_Ginny

Format: Novel
Chapters: 27
Word Count: 66,986

Rating: 12+
Warnings: Mild Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature

Genres: Fluff, Humor, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew, Voldemort, OC
Pairings: James/Lily, OC/OC, Remus/OC, Sirius/OC

First Published: 05/31/2006
Last Chapter: 10/23/2006
Last Updated: 11/01/2006

Thanks to the wonderful Midori for such an amazing banner!!!

This takes place during James and Lily's 7th Year. After James is once again rejected by Lily he asks the other Marauders for help. But is this a good idea? Especially if Sirius is helping? Join James, Lily and their friends as they tackle their last year and everything it brings; love, loss and laughter. PLEASE REVIEW!!!! I really need you to tell me what you think!!

Chapter 18: Chapter 18: Against the Odds

Chapter 18: Against the Odds

The next few days were hard on the entire group. James and Lily didn’t say a word to each other all weekend and they avoided any room the other was in. This made things difficult for Sirius, Remus, Jo and Alice because they had to divide their time between James and Lily.

Early on Sunday morning Jo and Alice were sitting in the common room talking about what happened and what they should do.

“Jo we have to do something. I can’t stand to see them like this anymore,” Alice said sadly. She hated seeing the sad and pained look in her friend’s eyes all the time.

“I know, but Lily won’t listen to anything we say to her. She just stormed out on us yesterday,” Jo said.

“That could be because James walked in,” Alice reminded her.

“That’s true. We have to get her to believe that James had nothing to do with what she saw, that it wasn’t his fault. If she doesn’t we have no hope of getting them back together,” Jo said.

“But what about James? He thinks Lily being with him is causing her too much pain. He said he has to give up,” Alice said sadly looking at her friend. She was counting on Jo to think of something, she always had an idea.

“Well, I think the first thing we have to do is get Lily to understand what really happened. If we can do that she can show James that she really does want to be with him and he does make her happy,” said Jo thoughtfully.

Alice nodded. “Should we go and talk to her again?” she asked.

“Yeah, she is sure to be up. She is always up early on a Sunday,” Jo said before getting up to leave but she stopped when she heard someone call her.

“Jo darling, what are you doing up at this early hour?” Sirius asked walking over to her and putting his arm around her shoulder. “Did you miss me so much you couldn’t sleep?” Jo reached up and hit him on the head, something she did too many times a day according to Sirius.

“I could ask you the same question,” she told him.

“Well Moony and I,” he said turning to Remus who had appeared at the bottom of the stairs. “We were coming down to discuss Prongs and we heard you two talking about just that. So we sat on the stairs listening to what you were thinking.”

Jo hit him again. “Why didn’t you just come down? We could do with your help.”

“Everyone could do with our help,” Sirius told her with a smile before jumping out of her reach so she couldn’t hit him again.

“We’re sorry about that, but we wanted to know what you really thought of the situation, not what we all think together. You seem to be thinking along the same lines as us though. We think it would be best to talk to Lily first and get her to believe us before we can do anything else aswell,” Remus told them.

"That's a lot of thinking for you!" Jo said quietly but Sirius caught it.

“We were just about to go and talk to her,” Alice said. “Maybe it would be better if we all went, that way she would know that you agree with us that it is not James fault?”

Remus nodded and the four of them left the common room. Sirius walked with his arm over Jo’s shoulder. He was exhausted; he never got up this early on the weekends. “The things you do for your friends! They better appreciate this,”

Lily woke up and turned over to look at her clock. 7:30, she groaned. She usually woke up early on the weekends but not this early. She swung her legs over the edge of her bed and sat up. Before she got up she noticed a note on her table. She reached for it and opened it slowly; afraid of what might be inside.

Lily Evans,
I warned you to stay away from him Evans, that he was mine. But no, you had to be stubborn. I told you you don’t deserve him and I am right. He needs someone who won’t bring him all the pain and sadness that you did. And that person is me! Maybe you saw us last night after he realised it? So stay away Evans, you are never to go anywhere near him again because if you do you will have to answer to me.



Lily threw the letter at the wall in frustration. Why should she care that he had a new girlfriend? Why would she be upset that Katie Chang had once again stolen her boyfriend? Why should it bother her that he never told her he didn’t want to see her anymore? Why should she care about what he did? But she did. She did care that James had a new girlfriend. She was upset that she had lost James to Chang. It did bother her that James had never told her that he didn’t want to see her anymore. She was so upset and frustrated about the situation. She looked around her room. She had stayed in the Head’s Room because James had moved back to Gryffindor Tower. But now she wished she had done it first because too many things about this room reminded her of him. She remembered the way he used to lean against the door and smile at her before he came in, how he told her so many times before she went to sleep that he loved her, all the times they sat on the common room sofa together talking and laughing, how he held her close when she was upset or anything went wrong, how he told her he would never leave her, that he would love her forever. She picked up a picture of the two of them that Sirius had taken of them at James house a few weeks before.

“Well it looks like you never really meant it James, did you? You swore you would never leave me or hurt me, didn’t you? But now you have. It is all my fault though. I should never have agreed to this in the first place. I knew you would never change. You are still an arrogant, conceited, big headed, self-centered, bullying, show-off, cheating JERK!” Lily shouted at the picture. She had too many emotions bottled up over the last month and they finally blew. Even with tears started to run down her cheeks she continued to shout. It had all become too much for her to hold in.

“Why did I ever think you had changed? You only wanted me because I was a challenge to you. But I was an idiot and thought you really had changed, that you really did love me. Even though we had only been going out two weeks I thought we had something special, that we would be together forever. Those two weeks were the happiest in my life. Except that you had other plans didn’t you? All you wanted was to prove you could get any girl you wanted. You never really loved me. You used my weakest moment to make your final move. I was so upset and alone that I actually believed that what you said was true. But it looks like you are still the same James Potter. You can’t love,” she cried dropping the picture on the floor where the glass frame shattered in a million pieces. “Just like my heart,” she thought to herself.

“That is not true,” said a deep voice from the door. Lily didn’t have to look up to know who it was, she knew his voice.

“Go away Potter, I don’t want to talk to you,” she said quietly

“Please Lily, I need-”

“DON’T CALL ME LILY!” she shouted at him. She still sat with her back to him. She didn’t want to face him.

James looked at her sadly. He hated seeing her upset. Over the last three days he tried to push Lily out of his mind. He wanted her to move on, to find someone else and forget him, but he couldn’t forget her. He had wanted her to go so she would be happy, except she wasn’t, and neither was he. He missed her being around. He missed her laugh, her smile, the feeling of her hand in his. She just wouldn’t leave his thoughts. No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t do it. He loved her and he didn’t want to let go. He tried to, he really did, but he couldn’t. He needed her. He wasn’t the same without her. Even before they had started going out she was always there, in his thoughts and right in front of him. He couldn’t bare the thought of losing her, yet she seemed to hate him. He had come to explain to her what had happened, even if she still didn’t want him, he needed her to know he loved her. He thought back to what Sirius had said the night it happened.

“Well, Prongs mate, it kind of looked to Lily that you were cheating on her. She isn’t likely to be very happy about that,”

He was right. He couldn’t live with himself if Lily thought for the rest of her life that she had cheated on her. He had to tell her the truth, and then see what happened after.

“Lily, please. You have to listen to me,” James said moving slowly into the room.

“No I don’t. I don’t need to hear your gloating Potter. Just leave me alone,” she told him.

“I’m not here to gloat Lily. I’m here to tell you what really happened. Please just look at me?” he asked sitting in the chair at her desk.

She turned slowly and looked at him with a mixture of anger, pain, frustration and sadness in her eyes. “I know what happened Potter. I saw it,”

“No, you jumped to conclusions. You didn’t wait for me to explain,” he told her.

“So you are here to make up excuses to try and get me to come back to you like an idiot?” she asked him angrily.

“No Lily. I already told you that I need to tell you what really happened.” He took a deep breath before continuing. “I was walking down the Transfiguration corridor when Chang came up behind me,” he said Chang’s name with disgust in his voice. “I asked her what she was doing out of her room and she said she was taking over for a sick prefect. I said ok and started to walk on but she stopped me and asked where you were and if we had broken up. I told her no and she said she was disappointed because she really liked me. She came really close and I told her get away but she just came closer. Then she….then she kissed me, just as you came around the corner. I heard you shouting and I pushed Chang off me but you had already run off. When I got back to the common room Alice told me you had gone upstairs and that it would be best if I gave you some time,” James said quite fast. He looked at Lily but she wasn’t looking at him. Instead she was staring out the window.

“You have to believe me Lily,” he said.

“Why? Why should I believe you?” she asked him still staring determinately out the window.

James looked at her stunned. “Why wouldn’t you believe me Lily? Alice and Jo told me about the letters you were getting from Chang, why would I leave you for someone like her?”

“I don’t know. I got another letter this morning saying she was your new girlfriend,” Lily told him quietly.

“So you are going to believe HER? Don’t you trust me Lils?” he asked but regretted it seeing the look that came over her face. “You idiot Potter! Of course she doesn’t trust you! She just found you making out with another girl!” said the incredibly annoying voice in his head.

“Why should I trust you Potter? You told me you would never leave me, but you did. You said you would never hurt me, but you did that too. You told me you would always love me, but you never did. You are still the arrogant, heartless jerk you always were,” Lily shouted at him.

“That is not true Lily. I do love you, I always have. I didn’t mean to hurt you, it was a misunderstanding. I don’t want to leave you. I love you more than anything else in the world. How could you even think like that? Can you not remember these last two weeks?” he asked her standing up and looking down at her.

“Do you not remember every night how I would hold you as you cried? How we would sit together for hours on a chair talking? How I stayed with you every moment after Halloween to make sure you were ok? Does that sound like someone who doesn’t love you? Would someone who didn’t love you do anything for you? I would Lily, and have,” he told her.

Lily looked down at her bed. Her eyes filled with tears again. She loved James, but she didn’t want to get hurt again. She still wasn’t sure if what he had said was true, even though Alice and Jo both told her that was what happened aswell.

“But why James? Why do you love me? Look at everything you have had to deal with because of me? Why do you think you love someone like me? You could have any girl you want, why me?” Lily asked him.

“I don’t know how to answer that Lily. I don’t know why I love you. Maybe it is your intelligence, or your humour, your smile, your caring or maybe it even started because you were the first girl who ever said no to me? Or it could be all of them, or even something completely different. The only thing I do know is that I love you,” he said sitting down beside her.

“How can you be so sure? We are only seventeen. How do you know that you won’t fall in love with someone else?” she asked him.


Lily looked at him with tears still in her eyes. “Don’t you get it Lily? I can’t explain why I love you, I just do. I know that you are the one for me, that there is no one else. I have chased you for seven years and never gave up. Everyone thought it was a phase, that I would get over you, but I knew it wasn’t. Even at eleven I knew I loved you. But I need you to tell me you feel the same Lily,” he told her.

“But James, look at everything we have been through and it has only been two weeks. Is it really worth it?” she asked him.

James looked at her exasperatedly. “No one said love was easy Lily. Everyone has to go through things. Maybe we had more to pull through more than anyone else but we got there didn’t we? Are you going to let one jealous girl ruin what we had and could have? I would do anything for you Lily. I would give my life if it was to keep you from harm. And you are worth all of it Lily. If we gave up at every obstacle that came our way we would never have gotten this far. Maybe we didn’t have a good start, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a happy ending,” he told her. He sat back down beside her and turned her to face him. He reached up and wiped her tears away. “But you have to believe that Lily. You have to want to get through it for it to work,”

Lily looked into his hazel eyes that were filled with determination, pain, sadness, but most importantly love. She saw that love shine brighter than ever before as she looked at him. “Do you want it to work Lily? Do you love me?” he asked her quietly.

“Ye-Yes James, I do love you. I love you more than anything in my whole life,” she told him, fresh tears running down her cheeks.

“Then why are you fighting it? Why are trying to hurt yourself?” he asked.

“I….I don’t know James. Everything has just happened so fast. I mean my parents die and the next day I start going out with you. Then I came back to Hogwarts to have everyone whispering about me and getting those threatening letters. Then I break up with you over all of it. I didn’t want to get hurt anymore James. I forced myself to believe what I saw was true instead of talking to you. I just wanted to escape from it all. I thought that by leaving you, I don’t know, I could leave it all behind. But I never realised how much I needed you until you weren’t there anymore. You were the only thing that kept me going through everything this year, and I repay you by breaking up with you? I was just so confused and upset and stressed that I took it out on you. I am so sorry James,” she cried.

He reached out his arms and wrapped her in a hug. “It is ok Lils,” he said into her hair. “You have been through so much already this year. I can’t imagine how you are feeling. But you need to know that I love you and will always be here for you, no matter what happens,”

“I do James. I am so sorry for all those horrible things I said about you, I didn’t really mean them, I was just confused,”

James laughed. “Don’t worry Lils, I know you don’t really think I am a heartless arrogant git or whatever you called me earlier,”

“Actually, it was an arrogant, heartless jerk,” she smiled at him.

He laughed again and bent his head down until his lips met hers. He had no idea how long they sat there, and he didn’t care. He was just happy things had worked out.

Outside the room, four people were leaning against the door after listening to James and Lily’s conversation.

“Well Padfoot, looks like you owe me those ten galleons,” Remus said happily. “I told you Prongs could do it without our help,”

Sirius looked very disgruntled when Remus said this. Jo looked at him questioningly.

“What? Moony and I placed a bet about how they would get back together. I said we would have to talk to them and get them thinking straight again,” Sirius told her.

“And I said James would realise that he and Lily are meant for each other and he would talk to her. So it looks like I was right,” Remus grinned.

“Yeah, yeah Moony. But I am kind of glad you won,” Sirius said. Everyone looked at him shocked. Sirius hated to lose.

“What? It means they can sort out their own problems and won’t be coming looking for me everytime they have an argument,” he explained. They all laughed at him.

“You know what Padfoot? You’re right. I think they will be fine on their own,” Remus said smiling. “Looks like Prongs has finally grown up,”

“Damn him,” Sirius said but laughed. “Why did he have to go and do that?”

They all laughed again before heading back to Gryffindor Tower.

A/N: I think there was too much mush and fluff in that! Ok i really need reviews people! Thanks so so so much to everyone who has reviewed! even if its only two words just to let me know! Please? Thanks for reading! Hope you liked it! = )