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From Hate To Love And Back Again by Irish_Ginny

Format: Novel
Chapters: 27
Word Count: 66,986

Rating: 12+
Warnings: Mild Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature

Genres: Fluff, Humor, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew, Voldemort, OC
Pairings: James/Lily, OC/OC, Remus/OC, Sirius/OC

First Published: 05/31/2006
Last Chapter: 10/23/2006
Last Updated: 11/01/2006

Thanks to the wonderful Midori for such an amazing banner!!!

This takes place during James and Lily's 7th Year. After James is once again rejected by Lily he asks the other Marauders for help. But is this a good idea? Especially if Sirius is helping? Join James, Lily and their friends as they tackle their last year and everything it brings; love, loss and laughter. PLEASE REVIEW!!!! I really need you to tell me what you think!!

Chapter 15: Chapter 15: Letters

Chapter 15: Letters
Lily woke late the next morning. The seven of them had been up pretty late the night before talking. Lily hadn’t slept too well as she was thinking of what the next day would be like. If Gryffindors had said things like that, she worried what the rest of the school (particularly Slytherins) would say about her.

For the first time in her years at Hogwarts, she got slowly out of bed, dreading the day that was ahead of her. She usually loved school and would have no problem getting up, but now things were different, she didn’t want to get up and face the rest of the school. “Come on Evans!” said a voice in her head. “Where is that Gryffindor courage?” But Lily didn’t feel like being brave today. She knew she had to, but that didn’t mean she wanted to be.

She got up and went into her bathroom and had a quick shower. After, she returned to her room and put on her new school robes, looking at herself in the mirror when she had them on. They felt wrong. She felt she looked different somehow. She turned when she heard a voice in her doorway.

“Morning sunshine!” said James cheerfully. “I was just coming to see if the fair maiden would be joining the handsome prince for breakfast.” He looked at her, he knew she hadn’t slept well and was worrying about the day ahead. “Or I could bring some up to you?” he offered.

“No. It’s ok, I’ll join the ‘handsome prince’. It would be harder to face everyone during class when you can’t jump up and hex them for me,” Lily smiled.

James laughed. “Says who? I hexed people in class loads of times. They just didn’t know it was me.”

Lily laughed at him and together they left the Heads Dorm and headed towards the Great Hall. Before entering Lily stopped.

“What’s wrong Lil?” James asked.

“Nothing. Just bracing myself for whatever is around that corner,” she told him.

“Don’t worry Lils. I am here. The only thing waiting for you is an amazing breakfast and our friends,” he said taking her hand.

Lily nodded and took a deep breath before entering the Great Hall, hand-in-hand with James. The whole school stopped as they entered. Everyone seemed to be in shock from what they saw, wether it was James and Lily coming in together, the fact Lily had come back, or both. The hall suddenly broke into urgent whispers as James and Lily made their way towards the Gryffindor table and their friends. Lily looked straight ahead trying to ignore everyone looking at her, but no matter how hard she couldn’t block out the whispers that followed her.

“I knew they would get together,” said one boy.

“WHY! I thought she hated him,” said another.

“Did you hear her parents were killed by You-Know-Who?” asked a Hufflepuff girl.

“I don’t know what he sees in her. He could do so much better. Like me!”

“Damn that Potter! How does he get all the girls? Even the ones who hate him!” said one frustrated boy from Ravenclaw who James knew liked Lily.

“Looks like she was let out of Azkaban early. Probably because she is Head Girl,”

“She always seemed so nice, I didn’t think she would turn evil,”

“I don’t know what Dumbledore thinks he is doing, letting a known Death Eater back to school,”

“WHY? WHY? WHY? Why did he pick her? She is a MUDBLOOD!” said a very angry looking Slytherin.

“It takes someone really evil to sell someone they know to Voldemort. I didn’t think Evans would do that,”

“I feel so sorry for her. Losing both her parents, it is so sad!”

Lily walked quickly to the Gryffindor table, gripping James hand more tightly with every comment. James had to let go of her hand and put his around her waist because he was afraid if this kept up she would break his fingers. When they reached the table, they sat down with their friends. Lily was trying hard not to cry after some of the things she had heard, but she wasn’t going to let them know they were getting to her. James was right, they were only saying this because they just wanted to find out what happened. The others, however, weren’t hiding their emotions as well as she was. James, Jo, Sirius and Remus looked like they would like nothing more than to jump up and hex everyone in the hall who had said anything. Peter seemed uneasy about the whole situation and didn’t say anything, but no one paid him any attention because he never really said much anyway.

James kept his hand firmly around Lily’s waist all through breakfast. Students around the group seemed to get the message from James, Sirius, Remus and Jo’s death glares not to say anything. Sirius tried to lighten the mood by telling jokes, which made Jo shout at him, so all through breakfast they listened to Jo and Sirius fight with each other.

“Oh come on Black, can’t you even stay quiet for two minutes?” Jo asked angrily.

“I have tried, but things just get so boring. I mean what is better than listening to me talk?”

“Let me see?” she said pulling a fake thoughtful face. “Being attacked by a herd of Grindylows, having potions all day-”

“Hey! That makes me think you don’t like being around me Plunkett!”

“You think? Anyway, I wasn’t finished, you interrupted me. What could be better? Being locked in a room with a dragon, being chased by a rampaging Hippogriff-”

“Ok, I get the point, but-”

“Being chased by ten bludgers without a broom. Pretty much anything is better than listening to you Black,” she said with a smirk.

“See Plunkett, you can’t get enough of me,” Sirius said happily.

“How thick are you? How did you get that from what I said?” she asked him wildly.

“You are denying you like me, so you are making up horrible things like this. I am really quite flattered,” he smiled.

“You are such an idiot Black! I do not like you! I never have and most certainly never will. You are an arrogant jerk who thinks he is so god-damn brilliant. How could you even think I had anything but bad feelings towards you Black? I HATE YOU! So just give up. Go off with whoever is the new girl-of-the-day because I am not interested. Just let me live in peace, and a peaceful life does not include you! Do you get it?”

Alice couldn’t help but laugh. Jo turned to her.

“What is so funny?”

“It’s just, I seem to remember having this exact same conversation with someone a month ago about someone she said she ‘hated’. And well, she is sitting beside him now with his arm around her,” Alice laughed.

“Exactly!” said Sirius. “You are just like Evans, so bloody stubborn and proud that you won’t admit you like me. Not that I ever thought you liked me Lily,” he said turning to Lily. “Prongs would have killed me if you did. I only wondered how you didn’t fall for my dazzling charms and dashing good looks. Why did you go for Prongs? Have you seen him?”

Everyone laughed at him. Jo however looked murderous but was saved from having to say anything because at that moment the post arrived and all talk was drowned out by the noise of hundreds of owls flying into the hall. Lily looked up and was surprised to see a beautiful snowy white owl flying towards her and landing on her shoulder. She removed the letter and offered the bird her rashers rinds, who took them gratefully and took off.

Lily looked down at her letter and opened it. She read through the letter shocked. Her face turned pale and her eyes filled with tears when she saw who it was from. With every word she read more tears rolled down her cheeks. James looked at her to see her pale face and tears running down it.

“Lils? What is wrong?” he asked worriedly. All he got was a sob in return as she finished the letter. She handed it to him with trembling hands. He took it and read:

Dear Lily,
I never got to see you after it happened so I am writing to tell you what I wanted to tell your face. I want you to know this is all your fault. You killed are parents Lily. If you weren’t a freak none of this would have happened. We would still have parents, and a home, and our belongings. All of this is your fault. I hope you feel really guilty for it.
The funeral was two days ago so don’t even bother writing to me asking when it is. I didn’t think you deserved to go and say goodbye to the parents you killed. I didn’t want you there so I didn’t tell you.
I hate you Lily. You destroyed our family. Our home. Our lives. You don’t deserve to be alive. What happened to “Being a witch will help me to protect you all”? You didn’t do a very good job did you? Decided to save yourself and leave our parents to die? I am disgusted with you Lily. I never want to hear from you ever again. You are no longer my sister or a member of the family you ruined. I have disowned you. Since mom and dad didn’t leave a will I have taken everything that was left. You are alone now. I hope you are happy about what you have done.
Vernon and I are getting married next week. You of course are not invited. I never wanted you there in the first place but mom insisted. But now she is not here to stop me and it is all your fault. I would never inflict you and your problems on my new family. They are too good for you. As am I. So never write to me again. Do not even think of coming anywhere near me because I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!


James threw the letter at the others so they could read it. He wrapped both of his arms around Lily and pulled her close to him. She slung tightly to him and continued to cry. “Damn that Petunia! How dare she say such things to Lily? She was finally starting to come around, she is going to be crushed by this. I could kill her! DAMN HER!” he thought bitterly.

Alice placed the letter back on the table after they had all read it. Alice’s eyes were swimming with tears and Remus looked like he too wanted to cry. Jo and Sirius looked ready to kill again. They all knew Petunia hated Lily being a witch and they didn’t get on well together, but none of them thought she would do something this cruel to her only sister. They were horribly mistaken. They all looked at Lily who was still crying silently, but had sat up so she didn’t attract any more stares from students.

“Don’t mind her Lils. She is so horrible to say that to you. It is awful,” said Alice quietly.

“I am going to kill her!” stated James, Sirius and Jo.

“But she is right,” Lily said. “If I wasn’t a witch they would still be alive. And she is right about how I couldn’t protect them. It is my fault,”

James turned Lily to face him. He had an angry look in his eyes. “Lily, you listen to me right now. This is NOT your fault! You have to believe that. I told you it wasn’t, so did Dumbledore, and my parents,”

“And us!” said Sirius, Remus, Jo and Alice together.

“Exactly. Lily you can’t let one selfish cow like her make you take the blame for what happened to your parents. Please don’t blame yourself. It won’t help. She just wants to have someone else to blame so she can feel better. She is putting all the blame on you because she doesn’t want to feel the pain you have had to feel,” James told her.

“Lily, you have been through twice as much as she has. She wasn’t there when it happened. Where was she? Out with her boyfriend. She didn’t see the fight you put up. She never saw how you risked your own life trying to save them. She just feels guilty because she wasn’t there to help, so she thinks by saying it is all your fault it will make her fell better. You cannot let her get to you!” Jo said reaching over to take her friends hand as she spoke.

“They are right Lily. You have to believe it is not your fault. There is nothing you could have done. You did everything you could do without getting yourself killed aswell. I am sure they are very proud of you,” Remus told her.

“But what am I going to do? Where am I going to live? I have no money. If it is true that she has taken everything, I have no where to go,” Lily said.

“Yes you do. You have us. You are coming to stay with me over the summer and Christmas. We could never leave you on your own. You will always have us, no matter what happens. We are your family Lils. The seven of us are in this together. None of us will betray you,” James said giving her a hug.

Peter had stayed quiet throughout the entire conversation but he looked up at this last comment. He felt terrible for what he had done and what he was doing at this minute.

Lily got up a few minutes later telling everyone she had to run to her room, she had forgotten her bag. Alice and Jo said they would go with her and meet the boys in class. So together the three girls walked out of the Great Hall, with more whispers following them, and up to the Head Dorms. Alice and Jo stayed to examine the common room while Lily went to get her bag out of her room.

When she entered her room she lay down on the bed for a minute thinking about the letter. She never thought Petunia would ever say anything like that to her. She was horrified that her only sister was blaming her for the death of their parents. She tried not to think about it, like James suggested, because whenever she did her eyes would fill with tears of anger and grief. “Could this day get any worse?” she asked herself. The answer to that question was on her bedside table. As Lily went to pick up her bag and leave the room, she noticed it. She walked back over to her bed and saw “Another letter? Who could it be from?”

She didn’t really want to open any more letters after the last one, but she didn’t think anything could top the one this morning. Maybe nothing could top it, but it could sure try. She picked up the letter and opened it to find not a letter from Dumbledore or something like that, but something that made Lily’s stomach drop for the second time that morning. She had been expecting a sympathy letter from a reader of the Daily Prophet, or one from someone thinking she had killed her parents. But whatever she had been expecting, it wasn’t this.

Lily Evans,
We are writing this letter as a warning. We saw you with a certain messy black haired boy this morning and we wanted to let you know: KEEP YOUR FILTHY MUDBLOOD HANDS OFF JAMES POTTER! He deserves someone better than you. Someone who will not bring pain and suffering to his life. Stay away from him if you now what is good for you. If you continue to go out with him you will be sorry. He needs someone better than you and we are making sure you let him. He has to move on, so don’t hold him back. This is your first warning. If you continue to lead James on we will be forced to take action. We will be watching you Evans, every step you take. You have been warned. If you are still together at the end of the week we will come and make you wish you never had the amazing pleasure of meeting James. So I suggest you leave him to people who can make him happy. If you don’t leave him we will take him from you!

Head of the J.P.F.C


P.S: Evans I have done this before on you and I can do it again. Don’t kid yourself thinking this is just a stupid love-sick student trying to frighten you. I mean it. Stay away from James or you will be sorry!

Lily looked at the letter again. Maybe dating James would be harder than she thought. Especially with his over obsessed fan club on the prowl.